Fighting Back

Chapter 12

Jax and Clay finally arrived at Nate's house after separating from Chibs, Opie Juice, Happy, Piney and Bobby.

As soon as Gemma's eyes landed on her husband she ran into his arms as he willingly accepted her.

"God damn I missed you baby." She spoke as she tried to gather as much of him as she could in her arms. Today she was taking Nate, her father, to a hospice and she was glad to finally have her man by her side in her hour of need.

"Missed you to baby." Clay pulled away so he could give his wife a kiss, a kiss that she gave into and returned with the same need as his.

After a couple more moments Gemma left Clay and moved over to Jax. She wrapped her arms around her son as Jax did the same thing, As much as he would never admit, all he'd wanted since Abel was taken was to have his Mom by his side.

"How my grandson doing baby?"

"Good. Nic's watching him."

"Wondered where she was. Thought she might have come with you." Jax could see the disappointment in his mothers face.

"Neeta was busy didn't trust anyone else." He said hoping that this would give his mother some comfort.

"Yeah."

"Where's Tara?"

"Inside."

Clay let them have their moment and went over to Tig who was standing near the door. They shared a brief hug.

"You a'lright?" Tig asked.

"Yeah, you?"

"I'm good." Clay and Tig were now both watching Jax and Gemma.

"Just you two?"

"Yeah. Hap, Piney and Bobby have gone to pick up some scripts for Hap's Mom. The others are meeting us here when they finish the drop." Tig nodded.

"Nicole not come with you?"

"Nah. Her bruises are still visible. Wanted to ease into telling Gemma about her and Ryan."

"Bet she was pissed." Tig said with a smile on his face, he could imagine the argument that erupted after Clay told her she wasn't aloud to come.

"Actually no she wasn't, didn't seem bothered." Tig eyed Clay curiously. "I know I didn't believe it either. Was expecting a whole load of shit from her but she was fine. She was pissed though when I told her who was gonna be watching her."

"Who'd you get?"

"Kozik." Tig straightened up, and his eyes widened. Clay obviously noticed this. "I know you don't like him, but he was the only..."

"You shouldn't have left her with him." Tig warned.

Clay was curious with Tig's reaction to the fact that he had left Nicole in Kozik care. But he didn't get a chance to query it as Jax and Gemma came over to them.

"How's the old man doing?" Clay asked his wife.

"Not good. He knows he's leaving. I just..." Gemma stopped mid sentence, not really knowing how to explain how she was feeling. She saw her father wondering into the gardens of his house. "It's gonna be a tough afternoon." She added. "You guys go on inside, I'm gonna try and get him settled." Gemma left them as she went after her father.

Tig gave Jax a nod. "How you doing brother?"

Jax shrugged. "How's the shoulder?"

"I'll live."

"Tig is there something I should know?" Clay asked gaining both Jax and Tig's attention, although Jax was the only one who seemed to be confused by Clay's words, it was Tig who questioned them.

"About?"

"Why I shouldn't be leaving Nicole with Kozik." Tig didn't need to look at Jax to know that he was staring at him waiting for him to respond because he could feel his eyes burning into the back of his head.

"Don't trust him."

"That all?" This time it was Jax asking the question. Tig looked back at Jax and nodded.

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Jax went inside and found Tara in Nate's room packing away some of his belongings. Jax stood silently in the doorway watching her, until she finally turned around and saw him.

"Hey." Tara stopped packing. This was the first time she had spoken to him since leaving after he had told her not to. She got onto her feet, preparing herself for what was about to come. "Jax I'm sor..."

"I don't want to hear it Tara. You did what you did. Nobody got hurt."

"If only he knew." Tara thought to herself.

"I don't want to fight any more." He walked over to her and kissed her cheek.

"I don't either." She agreed wrapping her arms around him.

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Jax and Tara walked into the kitchen where Gemma, Tig and Clay were sitting around the kitchen table. Jax noticed that Gemma looked pissed and gathered that Clay had told her about the plans of taking her to Vancouver.

"Clay how's is it going to look if I run away to Canada?"

"Doesn't matter. We get you set up somewhere safe, off the grid. Get you some new papers." Clay answered.

"Maybe you go red head for a while." Tig joked. Jax smiled as he took a seat next to Clay.

"I'd rather shave my head." Gemma quipped.

"Heat will die down Mom."

"And how long is that gonna be. How long till I see my family? My grandson, my niece."

"We'll figure it out." Jax told her. He looked at Tara who was standing behind Gemma, he could tell that she didn't agree with all this.

Nate walked into the room, Clay and Jax got to their feet.

"Good to see you Nate. How are you?" Clay asked generally concerned.

"Hey Grampa."

Nate just looked his grandson and son-in-law up and down for a moment before finally speaking. "What are you doing here?"

"They came to help me get you settled Dad."

"I don't need their help. This...this is what killed your mother." Nate shook his head as he left the room.

"Seems the old man remembers me." Clay stated sitting back down.

"You guys should just stay clear. Tara and I will handle this." Gemma left the room in the same direction as her Dad.

"You have to tell her." Tara spoke finally.

"We will but maybe we wait till Nate gets settled, spread the misery." Tara once again shook her head in disagreement, causing Clay to give Jax a 'Sort it out' look.

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Nicole went over to the CD player and inserted 3 doors down, Away From The Sun album. She pressed played. Grabbing the bottle of Vodka off the coffee table, she took another swig as she paced around the front room. With her free hand she ran her fingers through her hair, before slumping onto the couch and lighting a cigarette.

Today was one them days where she wished she had never bothered getting up, unfortunately this was a feeling she was getting used to.

Everything was so fucked up, that Nicole was struggling to find a way out of the mess.

She had no idea what was going to happen to Ryan, what he was going to do when he found out that the charges haven't been dropped. She knew she would have to go and see him again. Maybe if she told him the situation begged him not to follow through on his threat of turning in Happy, offering to do anything he wanted maybe he would change his mind, but Nicole wasn't going to hold her breath.

And then there was Kozik, she was finding it hard to be around him without it bringing back old memories, memories that she'd rather forget. She took another hit of Vodka, as she lay back into the sofa, listening to the music.

I'm not supposed to be scared of anything but I don't know where I am
I wish that I could move but I'm exhausted and nobody understands
I'm tryin' hard to breathe now but there's no air in my lungs
There's no one here to talk to and the pain inside is making me numb

I try to hold this, under control
They can't help me, 'cause no one knows

As the words of the song Changes played through her head she shouldn't take it any longer she had to get out of the house, suddenly she was finding it hard to breathe. Grabbing her jacket and bag she left the house on unsteady feet.

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Jax took the last of the boxes down into the basement. "That's the last of them." He said to Tara as he placed the boxes on the floor. He went to head back upstairs but Tara stopped him.

"I wanna come with you." Jax stopped and looked at her. "To Canada." She continued.

"No." Jax backed up and went over to Tara.

"Look I'm the only one who's not wanted. You're going to need my help."

"What I need is for you to go back to Charming."

"He's mine to." She blurted out, Jax furrowed his brow at her.

"What?"

"I want to be with my family."

"WERE NOT YOUR FAMILY." Jax shouted making her flinch, but not because he shouted it was what he had said.

"How can you say that to me?"

"Because you don't want this life, your not made for it."

"But your Mom, Nicole they are?"

"Don't bring them into this, this isn't about them. Your not coming and that's it." Jax once again went to walk away but he was stopped again by Tara shouting at him.

"Yes I am."

"You wanna be an Old Lady then ACT LIKE ONE. DO WHAT YOUR TOLD." He screamed at her as he finally reached his limit.

"I just helped your mother kill someone. THAT OLD LADY ENOUGH FOR YOU?"

"What did you do?"

"The caretaker, the one Tig was screwing she attacked your mother."

"What the hell." Jax ran his hands through his hair.

"We had no choice it was self defence. Tig helped us get rid of the body."

As if on cue Gemma, Clay and Tig come enter the basement. "We've gotta go." Clay announced upon his arrival.

"I'm dealing with something." Jax replied not taking his eyes off Tara.

"Yeah so are Bobby and Piney." Tig added sarcastically.

"What's going on?" Clay asked picking up on the tension that Tig obviously missed.

"Apparently are lovely Ladies whacked the caretaker. And this idiot helped them." Jax pointed at Tig who was looking at Gemma.

"Actually I just made a phone call." Tig informed them.

"We'll deal with this shit later, right now we've gotta go." Clay walked back upstairs, Jax following making sure to curse at Tig as he passed him.

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Kozik arrived at Annie's house just as the thieves were walking Happy, Piney, Bobby and Annie out of the house by gunpoint. Kozik drew his gun.

"Let them go." Kozik ordered.

"Think your a little outnumbered. Drop your gun or Granddad gets it." The man who was holding Piney hostage said.

Just as the man finished his sentence they heard the rumble of motorbikes approaching. Kozik turned around and saw Jax. Clay, Tig, Juice, Opie and Chibs pulling up. They pulled out their own guns and aimed them at the thieves. Kozik looked back at the man who was holding Piney and gave he a cocky grin, which got even more cockier when he heard more bikes pulling up.

"Looks like your the one who's out numbered now shithead." Kozik said.

After disarming the thieves, Chibs and Juice searched the guys van and found some prescription drugs. Annie told them that they did't belong to her. Jax told her to take it but she said that it's not her thing, but that it did have a lot of street value if they wanted it, which of course they did. Tig saw Kozik heading to his bike and decided to take advantage of the fact that everybody was busy, he made his way over to him.

Kozik was about to put on his helmet and head back to Charming, when he heard someone approaching him, he turned around to see Tig heading in his direction, he rolled his eyes knowing full well what was coming.

"Before you start I haven't done anything to her." Kozik said flatly.

"If I find..."

"Tig I just said I haven't done anything." Kozik said again. Tig took a step closer to him as the two squared up to one another.

"You stay away from her, you here me."

"What's going on?" Jax asked as he approached the two of them.

"Nothing." They answered, finally backing away from one another.

"Right." Jax smirked. "You heading back to Charming?" He asked Kozik.

"Yeah."

"Tell Nic I'll call her later." Kozik nodded and finally got on his bike and drove away. "What was that all about?"

"Nothing." Tig answered bluntly before walking away from Jax.

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Carl was in the workshop when he heard the sound of tyres screeching into the parking lot. Looking from under the hood of the Blue Nissan he was working on when he saw it was Nicole's Mustang. He watched on as she tried to park up almost hitting the car she was trying to park next to. He knew something was wrong.

Nicole sat in the car her shaky hands resting on the steering wheel as her tears fell. She had no idea what she was doing, she had almost hit that car next to her, what if it had been a person, she shuddered at the thought.

"Nic.." She looked up at the sound of the voice, and saw Carl standing at her drivers door. Seeing him Nicole finally felt like she had someone to turn to. "Come on."

Carl gave her his hand and helped her out of the car, he could feel her shaking. He pulled her close to him as he walked her into the garage office. He sat her down on the battered couch, and went over to the coffee pot and poured her a cup, adding a couple of sugars he figured she could probably use it.

"Here, drink this." He told her as he knelt beside here, placing the coffee mug in her hands. He watched as she wrapped her hands around the mug, he could she was enjoying the warmth it gave her. He moved a piece of her dark hair from her face. "So you ready to tell me what the hell is going on?"

"I'm trying so hard to keep my shit together for Jay but I'm struggling. I don't know if I can do this any more. I just keep screwing up."

"Nic what are you talking about?"

"Ryan." She croaked out between her tears.

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Kozik left in the direction of Charming as the other guys headed to Nate's house so they could head up to Canada. The entire ride Kozik kept thinking about his conversation with Tig, he knew he was always going to mad at him, about what he did. He couldn't help but wonder how he would react to thought of him returning to Charming for good, not just him but Nicole to.

Kozik was so involved in his own thoughts that he didn't even notice that Nicole's car was gone. As he walked inside the house he was greeted by the stereo blasting, and an almost empty bottle of vodka on the coffee table.

"Nicky...Nicky." He searched the bedrooms only to find out she wasn't there. He grabbed his keys and drove to the only other place he knew she would go, Teller/Morrow.

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Nicole watched nervously as Carl digested what she had just told him about her trying to drop the charges on Ryan. He looked like he was struggling and Nicole knew, just like everyone else that he didn't understand.

"You hate me don't you. Just like everyone else will when they find out." Carl didn't answer her. Nicole wiped away her tears. "I shouldn't have come here. I'm sorry." She croaked as she placed the cup of coffee onto the floor and got to her feet. She was out the door when she felt him grab her arm. Turning around, she looked into his sad eyes and she lost it. Her body started shaking as she sobbed against him.

"Sushhh it's okay. It's going to be okay."

When he finally felt her settle down, he pulled away so he could look at her and was taken aback by what he was greeted with.

He may have only known Nicole for a short time, but during that time he had never seen her like this. She had always come across so strong. Yes she'd had a lot of shit thrown a her but she always seemed to deal with it, and somehow come out stronger. But not this time, this time she was breaking and Carl wasn't sure if anyone could save her, but he was going to try his damnedest to.

He firmly placed his hands on her shoulders as he stared down at her.

"Now I'm going to need you to tell me everything okay. Tell me why you wanted the charges dropped. And I promise you nothing you can say can make me hate you. Understand?" Nicole nodded as she gave him a closed lip smile.

"I went to see him at the hospital." She paused as she stepped away from Carl and staring passing the small office. "He told me that if I didn't drop the charges then he would tell the police that it wasn't Hale who shot him. I didn't want to do it Carl, I promise, but I can't let him do this." She ran her fingers through her hair.

Carl looked at her in confusion, it was obvious to him that she was leaving something out, something that he knew probably involved the club somehow. Carl had come to learn that something's that involved the club were only to be discussed between Son's and family, a rule Nicole followed religiously which was why he wasn't going to push her.

Saying it out loud she realised just how much she didn't want Happy to get taken away, and even though she may have failed in getting the charges get dropped she wasn't about to idly sit back and allow that to happen. She went to leave but again Carl stopped her.

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As he pulled inside Teller/Morrow he saw her car parked up. He parked his bike and strode inside the Clubhouse, he scanned the bar but couldn't see her.

"Where's Nicole?" He asked some of the hangarounds. No one gave a proper answer they just shrugged signalling that they didn't know where she was. He stormed back outside heading to his bike when he saw the light in the garage office.

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"Where are you going?" He asked as he spun her round to face him.

"I have to go and see him, find another way."

"Another way to what?"

"To get him out."

"Why?"

Carl didn't get his answer because at that point Kozik decided to barge in. Nicole looked up over her shoulder before quickly turning away as she pulled her arm free from Carl so she could wipe away her tears.

"I thought I told you to stay put." He yelled in Nicole's direction, but she was to upset to answer him. "Nicky" He grabbed her arm focusing her to look at him, and when she did all he was met with was tears. Kozik looked over to Carl.

"What's going on?"

"Nothing." Nicole answered, pulling her arm free from Kozik's grip. She was really getting sick of everyone grabbing her.

"Doesn't look like nothing."

"Nic maybe..." Carl stopped when Nicole glared at him giving him a warning look. She didn't want any of the Sons to know about Ryan especially Kozik. He was the last person she wanted knowing her business.

"I'm not going to ask again." Kozik warned.

"It's nothing just leave." She shouted in a frustrated scream.

"Fine. I'm done with all your drama bullshit anyway. You need to fucking grow up."

"Hey back off man." Kozik let out a small laugh, as he watched Carl stand protectively next to Nicole. He shook his head, before he stormed out.

"What the hell is that guy's problem?" Carl asked.

"Me."