(A/N) Okay, so this one is late. So sorry. It's just I had a con to get ready for and then go to, you know. All that and I guess I had exams to do. Not that I studied for those. But they still took up some valuable time. This was just really bad timing, but at least it's Zack again. Hopefully I can still get his personality right… or at least the way I used to do it. I think I can. We'll see. It's been a while.
--
I stared questioningly into the scene before me. Usually I could understand what my dreams were telling me, but this? This was just colors swirling about in a hazy way. What could that possibly mean? It almost looked like the lifestream but… more than just a solid green. There were purples and blues, even some yellow here and there. They just swirled around and twisted around each other. I couldn't make any sense of it. I was dazed and absent-mindedly took a step forward. It only took that for everything to stop. It all just froze and looked as though it were solid. It looked like I could reach out and touch it. As soon as I'd regained my senses I found myself attempting to do so.
My fingers slowly extended forward as I reached out to grasp it. Every second I got closer, there came a loud buzzing sound all around. I didn't like it, but it was only a dream and I wanted to see if anything would happen. So I continued to move forward. So much so that I could almost…
'BZZZZT!'
Everything turned red with patches of orange in thinner areas. I heard a metallic sound with sparks crackling after it. Then there was an abrupt shredding sound, like a sword piercing through the chest. At almost the same time there was a yell. I looked and looked, but there were no images, just sounds. But the shout sounded like Cloud. And then there was another. The voice for the second one took me a while to place because I'd not realized it was me. An impulsive reaction to something flying at me and splashing across my face.
I stopped to try and identify the substance that was now running down my face and dripping from my chin. This was easy enough to figure out with a quick touch and swipe of the finger. It was indeed blood. Bright red blood. Fresh blood, very fresh, and still warm. It had to have come from the chest.
This was insanity, but it all receded when I heard someone approach from behind. Laughing about something. Not exactly an evil laugh either. More like, 'I just saw the funniest thing ever', sort of laugh. It made me feel better about what I'd just seen by just knowing something funny had happened. Besides, I knew the voice. "Angeal?" I asked. "You came back?"
"Only on heavy prompting from Aerith." Was his reply. I rolled my eyes. He always tried to make it seem like he didn't really care in situations like this. But the fact of the matter was he was concerned. I could tell. It was sorta an on-going joke we had.
"So what are you laughing about?" I said to get him to say something.
"Oh, nothing. Perhaps I'll tell you later." He answered. "Right now I can't. There's something that goes along with it that you must find out for yourself first."
"Oh…" I sighed. One of those. Fine… I'd deal with it later. "Why are you here then?"
He paused and looked as though he were really trying not to think about something so that he may better concentrate. "Because…" He started and then stopped again. "Because it seems that you need some help waking up."
"What?" I asked. I needed help? That wasn't expected.
"Just hold still." He said holding my head still by placing a hand on either side of my face. "This may hurt." He warned. I didn't have much time to process it before there was an almost electrified pain on my forehead. It later occurred to me that he'd, for some reason, bashed his head against mine.
"Ow!" I gasped sitting upright.
"Sorry, I dropped it." I heard someone say.
"Wha…?" I asked. I was so dazed I couldn't even see yet.
"Cid 'dropped' your phone on your head." Tifa answered. "It went off a minute ago and we came to see if you'd woken up yet. But you were asleep when we came in. So he… well…"
"Bah, whatever. The guy's been asleep for three days. He can-"
"Three days?!" I shouted. I'd been aware that I was asleep for a while, but three days? I was shocked that had actually gotten to a number of days. "Oh man… is Cloud okay?!" I said urgently. Last I could remember he was sick; very sick. That took priority. I had to know that he was okay.
"Uhh…" They both said at once. That couldn't be good. Something like that was never a good sign.
"That's uh…" Tifa tried to answer, but she wouldn't allow herself to do it.
"We lost him." Cid blurted out.
My heart sank. Cloud was… lost? No. He couldn't be lost. How did that happen? "You… lost him?"
--
I tried to believe what Tifa was saying. But it seemed too unreal. More than likely I just didn't want to believe it. "Out the airlock?" I asked. Was he even alive? He had to be. Angeal would've told me if he weren't, wouldn't he? Yeah. If Cloud was dead, he probably would've told me that I'd failed my objective and escorted me to purgatory. That was right. What was I thinking? If Cloud were dead he definitely would not have been laughing.
"Yeah." Tifa said uncomfortably. "Vincent said he took care of it, but…"
"What does that mean?" I asked. What could he mean by, 'He took care of it?' I wanted to know, but I had the feeling that he left it at that. That assumption was confirmed by her shrug. That wasn't good enough. "Where did he fall? How far are we? Did you even go out and look for him?!" I'd convinced myself that he was alive, but that only gave rise to the new issue; Cloud was lost. That meant he wasn't close which meant he was in danger. That wasn't good. Not in the least. He was supposed to stay by my side at all times… Or at least in my sight.
"Oh, for cryin' out loud." Cid said from the corner of the room. "We don't know what's up. He fell out near Nibelheim and we had to go to Mideel."
Mideel? Nibelheim? That was a continent away! "I have to go find him." I said getting out of the bed and starting for the door. "He won't last long on his own."
"Cool your jets!" Cid shouted. Cool my jets? How could I do that? Even if I had jets I wouldn't cool them. Jets would definitely help though. He really didn't understand that I had to find Cloud right now. "You didn't hear us out at all-"
"We're going back to look right now." Tifa broke in. That was fine. I'd almost forgotten how much Cid scared me and started something stupid. "We wanted you to help out with our mission but you slept through it so…"
"We're in Junon." Cid sighed. "Tryin' to restock on some things but, believe it or not, they're still floundering around with their economy after the uh…" He glanced at Tifa. "The incident."
"Incident?" I asked. Hmm… incident. Which incident would that be? It involved Tifa and Junon… "Oh, right! Scarlet almost killed her and then there was that catfight… with Scarlet." I said realizing there was probably a reason Cid didn't mention it. She didn't look too upset though. She looked more like something had weirded her out. "What?"
She shook her head as though to say 'nothing', but as usual Cid wouldn't be so nice. "Now it's just weird that you know that."
"Huh?" I didn't get it. I was just looking out for Cloud like I always did. Just in case he got into any trouble. Not that I didn't care about Tifa but, she had her mother to look out for her and her father. Cloud didn't have that. Truthfully, and sadly, he had his mother… but he didn't have his father. Same in life, looking out for someone took both parents. Only I wasn't his father. I was his lover. It was weird. But, she didn't really mind it. She unexpectedly liked me. Usually mothers detested the man that took her little boy's innocence. But… she didn't mind it at all. No remark about him being too young or anything. Even though some people told me he was too young for me. Some. But no. Not her. She was just happy it was me rather than one of the boys at the barracks. And an even greater shock to me was that she didn't like Sephiroth. Not just after he uh… killed her. But even before that. She didn't think he was a good man. But he was… even though he didn't exactly handle Cloud as delicately as he should have. But that was what happened when a city guy tried to make it with a sheltered country boy.
"Zack?" Tifa asked. "Great. There he goes again, he's spacing."
"What?" I was spacing? I was. Oops. I couldn't help it. Thinking about his mother really made me consider some things. And wonder about his jackass of a father. She never really talked about him. Of course I didn't really talk to her either. Cloud's entire being was an enigma. His mother had brown hair and blue eyes. Blonde was probably a recessive trait on her side. So it was either he looked like his father or… but at the same time he looked like his mother. Without seeing the father Cloud was a real mystery to me. Were they both gorgeous or did Cloud get lucky?
"Zack."
"Ah!" I shouted. Someone from behind had spoken in a deep dark monotone voice. I then realized it was only Vincent. "Yes?"
"I got a call from Reno. He says he'd found him and lost him at the Gold Saucer."
"Reno?" Tifa asked.
"The Gold Saucer?!" I shouted. Really? Was there any worse place to lose someone? How could Reno, a Turk, lose one small boy? It was ludicrous. "When did he lose him? What? How?"
"Hey…" Cid said, but no one paused to let him speak.
"He found him down near Corel Prison with some chocobo farmers. He took them up to the park with the helicopter, they went to the races, left to get some food and when they came back he was gone." Vincent answered. That didn't sound too good. No. That actually didn't sound good at all. Anything could've happened. Especially if they lost him in the Chocobo Square. I couldn't help but think that he was getting violated as we sat here and talked. Most likely getting ravaged by a bunch of thugs as he kicks and coughs out screams from being held down by a lead pipe. Oh man, Angeal was going to kill me if that happened. How could I let this happen? Damn me for falling asleep! "He says he lost him the other night and doesn't know where he went."
"Hey!" I heard Cid again. This time I actually cared to pay attention. Hopefully something good. "You got an e-mail on your phone telling you to come to North Corel." North Corel? Why there? "It's from somebody claiming that they found Cloud and took him there for shelter."
"Who sent it?" I asked.
"I dunno. I didn't look." I stared for a couple seconds out of confusion. Who wouldn't? He read my mail, but he didn't bother to see who sent it? Odd, very odd. But whatever.
I picked up my phone from where it had landed after slipping off my head and looked for the message. It was the most recent, obviously and in the SOLDIER folder. That was weird. The message itself had no subject. It just told me that Cloud was fine and that they'd taken him to North Corel for us to pick up, like Cid said. And as weird as I'd thought it was before, what was even weirder was that it was in the SOLDIER folder but with an unknown sender. My phone didn't make mistakes like that. So the sender must've hacked it somehow. But how would they do that? "Is Yuffie in Wutai?" I asked. The question was more directed towards myself. There was little chance that Yuffie learned how to hack my phone, especially after I'd died. So… how did this happen? Hmm… "Oh well." I sighed. That wasn't important right now. What was important was getting this ship moving to North Corel. I had to see that he was okay for myself before I could relax. Without actually seeing him there was still the possibility of… anything really. And there was always the trustworthiness of this person to put in question. What if this person decided they wanted to-?
No, no. People weren't always like that. Whoever this person was saved him from such a fate. And not all people did so just to have a chance of their own. I'd just been so used to not being able to trust anybody for so long. And in this situation with the people I'd been seeing… it told me I didn't really have to worry as much I used to. But, then again, I hadn't met very many strangers. I'd mostly been encountering AVALANCHE members. Sephiroth was the only thing I'd seen that made me concerned for his wellbeing. Even though Sephiroth had said that he wasn't going to kill him he could still do damage. Sufficient damage. He could do anything; mental, physical. He was a trained General for pity's sake! He was a master of torture! And Cloud wasn't himself. He could make him do whatever he wanted, but it would all be for nothing. He could force Cloud to apologize a thousand times over, but it would not be a true apology. It'd only be words, simple words. No meaning behind them. Besides, Cloud was the one who deserved an apology. But that wasn't something anyone was about to get. Not from Sephiroth. So, I suppose, our focus should be on finding him.
"When can we leave?" I asked. I guess it came on as an impatient question because Cid gave me a dirty look. Of course, when didn't he?
"We can leave as soon as we get everything we need." Tifa answered.
"Well what are you missing?" I sighed. "I'm not meaning to sound rude but it's kinda important that we get him back." We didn't know for sure if the person he was with was equipped to handle any sticky situations. Any problems by the name of Kadaj, Loz, or Yazoo were all a league out of the ordinary. And they were all under the orders of Sephiroth who, unlike them, was not an idiot. Well… I guess Loz was the only idiot. But the others weren't exactly as smart as him…
"We know, Zack." Vincent answered.
"We need fuel." Cid said starting toward the door. "But I've got it covered. Just go out and try to stay out of trouble." What was that supposed to mean? Stay outta trouble, huh? Since when did I do otherwise? Trouble wasn't good. It was always something to avoid. So, obviously, I was going to do so.
"Fine." I shrugged. I could take orders. But I had to take certain precautions before I could go out. Such as changing out of my uniform. As I'd been telling myself, SOLDIERs did not exist anymore… well… I didn't exist anymore. It wasn't as though people actually believed what the news, etcetera, told them. But I'd been gone for a while. And, based on the staring and general shocked expressions from the people of Edge, I'd say it was safe to assume that I ought to at least try to disguise myself here. It would probably work. I wasn't a very important person, so a weak attempt should've been good enough to fool them. Edge was a place that I probably should've been more careful in. But it was an emergency and there was no time to think of a good disguise. This was only Junon. The only things I was known for here was letting that gosh darn Hollander get away from me! A rather humiliating failure that happened at least twice. I believe Cloud had to chase after him once. But that didn't go over too well either. I asked him about it, but he wouldn't tell me. I suppose that meant it was really bad. He did make it to the bathhouse though. So I once had inkling that Angeal had something to do with it, but even he wouldn't say anything. So I'd dropped the subject. It was probably a case of getting jumped from behind or something… Or trying to fight Angeal… hmm…
Ah well. I'd just leave it at that. No sense in trying to get the truth out of him now. As his mind was, that hadn't even happened yet. And it wouldn't. Hollander was dead. So there was no fat guy to chase. "Why was that old fat guy so hard to catch anyhow?" I asked myself as I looked around for spare clothing. "I mean, he's old. And fat." There was no logical reason as to why neither of us could catch him. It didn't make sense.
"I wonder if I should try calling Cloud." Just to tide me over until we get to North Corel. Who knows? He may be in a panic too. Wouldn't want that. So I stopped in a hallway, couldn't say which one, they all looked the same to me, and took out my phone. Staring at the window as I dialed, I remembered the feather I'd found and reached into my pocket to see if it was still there. Sure enough, it was. I mean of course it was. Where was it going to go? It wasn't as though these people go through my pockets looking for spare change or anything… Nah. They wouldn't do that. Tifa wouldn't let them. Besides, it wasn't like I had anything to take.
I tried to clear my head and just listen as the phone rang. That was a good sign. The fact that it was ringing clearly meant that his phone wasn't dead or switched off. The sad thing was I heard the responsive ring from somewhere close by. Man! That sucked. That only meant that wherever he was at this particular moment, he did not have his phone. Hopefully he didn't get separated from the anonymous savior, with MY number, along the way.
I followed the sound, even though I knew it wouldn't lead me to him. But I figured I'd better go find it so I could at least give it to him once we'd found him. It led me down to about the end of the hall and staring at a familiar door. Once I'd opened it, I found the room almost exactly how I'd left it… but with an absence of a certain crucial blonde sleeping semi-soundly in the bed. But the sound didn't lead me to the bed. It led me to the corner of the room and into the hamper. I then found the phone in the pant pocket of his uniform.
"What're you doing?" I heard Tifa ask from behind.
"Discovering Cloud's phone in the pocket of his discarded uniform." I answered transferring the phone to my pocket for the time being. "Tifa… not that I expected him to be wearing this all this time but… if he's not wearing this, what is he wearing?"
"Oh! Uh…" She looked a bit surprised by the question. It wasn't as though I was demanding to know, but I was curious. "He would be wearing… the only thing that fit?" She shrugged.
I kept my focus on the hamper to avoid her seeing my confused expression. She hadn't answered my question at all. And to further add to the dilemma was that she'd answered it in such an awkward almost… embarrassed sort of way. "And that would be?" I asked as light-heartedly as I could.
"Some of Sherra's clothes." She answered back nonchalantly. I blinked a couple of times before actually trying to understand what she'd just told me. Sherra was a name. A woman's name. The name of the ship, but the ship was named for Cid's… significant other…?
"You put him in girl clothes?!"
"If you want to be technical, yes… but it's not like we put him in a dress or anything." She said in such a way that told me she'd just noticed I wasn't particularly happy about it. "He's wearing pants and a shirt. They're just… cut for a woman's body."
"Hmm…" That was okay I guess. It could've been worse. Not that I thought she'd put him in a dress or anything, he wouldn't wear it anyway. It was just… effeminate clothing. It wasn't the best thing to be lost in. Especially not something to get stuck in while out in public. Not to mention he was lost with a complete stranger wearing girl pants. Not the worst thing that could happen to somebody but it wasn't good either. There was the off chance that whoever this person was bothered to get him something different to wear. But… "Whatever." I'd rather find him without clothes anyway.
"Okay." She said starting to tidy up a little.
"Alright…" I said trailing off and finding myself in the hall. It was then when I remembered that I had absolutely no idea where I was going. "Hey, Tifa, where did you find the spare clothes?"
"Go back towards the bridge, instead of a right take a left, it's the fourth door." She answered back not even looking up from her current task.
"Oh…" That took care of that. She wasn't even going to show me herself? I bet she walked Cloud to it. Oh, but of course she did because he never would've picked out girl clothes! Not that it was her fault, or anyone else's for that matter. But the whole situation just seemed so… so… well typical but that wasn't the point.
As I walked I began to notice the blonde's scent more and more. It was torturous. It was a very faint scent but still torturous. All this time and I still hadn't had a decent moment alone with him. It was all just problem after problem. When was the planet going to allow us even just a moment together? Preferably a moment of peace. These conditions weren't exactly ideal for arousing his inner feelings. Not that his attractions were top priority to me. I just though that when the Ancients said 'punishment' they meant 'have fun and be safe'. A common misconception, right?
"What're you doing in my closet?" I heard Cid ask while I rummaged through various articles of clothing.
"Finding something to wear. My uniform is getting kinda funky." I answered. "I thought you went to get some fuel."
"I called it in. It'll be here in a while." He sighed. "Why are you going through my things?"
"Huh?" What did he expect me to do? "I can't wear Sherra's clothes if that's what you want." I paused as I pulled out something suitable. "My uniform is gross and I have to at least try to avoid being recognized. Just to avoid unnecessary confrontations, of any kind, and I don't want news of our location. I'd feel really stupid if Sephiroth picked up the trail because of me."
"… well… couldn't he do that by finding out where me, Vincent or Tifa are?"
"… I never thought of that." He would do that, wouldn't he? So that meant he probably knew we were here. So why didn't he make a move? Did he know where Cloud was? Hopefully not.
It was thoughts like that which made me really frantic about finding the poor kid. The sooner he was back in my arms the better. That damn fuel couldn't get here quick enough! Which made me wonder if I should even risk wasting more time by going out. No. I ought to. But I'd need some money so that I could get some things. Perhaps some restore materia for any present, or future, injuries. But, more than anything, I was going to find some clothes for myself rather than Cid's stuff. Perhaps I'd try to find Cloud something too but… I couldn't be sure what his preferences were in this phase of his life. Was he more true to his real personality or was he trying to be cool and impress people? Geez… he couldn't complain with jeans, hoody, and a T-shirt. Last I could remember casual was good for everybody. It wasn't like he could get too upset. Anything was better than what he had now, right?
--
I finally stepped out in some forest green cargo pants and a black button-down shirt. It kind of surprised me that he hadn't worn them yet. Surprised, but relieved. I didn't think that I would be able to wear it if he had. It wasn't so much that it was him. It was just… I had no idea what kind of person he was. Was he the type to spontaneously go commando? I seriously doubted it, but I had no way of knowing for sure. That was the only thing that freaked me out.
Letting out a long sigh I slipped on some sunglasses to hide my mako eyes. That was one of my main concerns. With this I could at least deny any claims but I couldn't deny anything if they could see the mako glowing within my irises. That was a dead give away. Kind of crippling in stealth missions now that I had the time to think about it. Not that I was ever the stealth type. But that was beyond the point. It wasn't even that I was worried about Sephiroth finding us through me being recognized. I just didn't want to put up with it now. Nothing to slow us down. Cid told me to stay out of trouble and I intended to do so. There were no openings for small talk in my schedule. So, no talking to store clerks or anything. Just a go in real quick and then leave sorta deal.
"Hey, are you looking for something?" Somebody asked.
"Um…" I glanced over in their direction just to see if there actually was something I needed. And indeed there was. He was sitting with his back to a, seemingly, abandoned building. He had his wares laid out on an old newspaper, which consisted of mostly junk. Not a person I would usually buy from but he had some gems in the rough with a couple of pieces of materia. I saw two spheres of dark green. More than likely a weak fire materia and… maybe a blizzard. I was beginning to get a little discouraged when I didn't see any of them were useful. But then I saw something lime green glimmering in the back of what looked like a lead pipe. Score! Cure materia! I was glad I'd found some but, to be honest, I was hoping for something of the Cura variety. "Sorry. I think I'll keep on looking."
"Don't I know you?" He asked.
"I don't think so." I said starting to walk away.
"Sure I do. You're that Fair fella." He almost laughed.
"What're you talking about?" I asked.
"You're Zack Fair. That first class that was here years ago." He said pointing. I knew I didn't mean to but I looked a little dumbstruck by something actually recognizing me. I shrugged it off quickly and quickly denied his claim. "No. I'd recognize you anywhere. It's that scar of yours." I couldn't help but twitch a little. This guy's persistence was annoying. But it was okay. This was fine. It was only one person.
"Fine." I sighed. "You're right. Just don't tell anybody."
"I could do that…" He said. Good. Someone reasonable. "… If you bought something."
That caused me to go into a state of shock. I couldn't believe this guy was blackmailing me. It wasn't that I was desperate to keep my identity a secret it was just… this guy must've been desperate. I mean to threaten someone who could just kill him with no questions asked, that was dangerous. I suppose I could indulge him. "Okay." I said trying not to sound annoyed. "How much for this?" I asked holding up the Cure materia.
"Hmm… how much you got?"
"Two hundred gil." I answered.
"Then it's two hundred Gil." He replied.
"Oh come on!" I said rolling my eyes. "Fine." I grunted giving him the money and pocketing the materia. That money wasn't even mine. I… borrowed it from Vincent.
"Thanks." He said taking it without any regrets. "I always knew you were alive." He whispered Just as I'd left. Great. Not only was I blackmailed, but I was blackmailed by a complete lunatic. Of course I was dead. I'd been dead for a while. Where did he expect me to be if I weren't? Underground? Waiting until the heat let's up? Geez. Whatever. It wasn't like he actually took all my money. I'd learned over the years that if they ask how much you've got, you only tell them a small fraction of what you've got.
"Hopefully no one else identifies me because of my stupid scar." I hadn't even thought to hide the 'X' on my jaw. Oh well… I only had one more stop before it was off to find Cloud.
--
The next thing I knew I was back on the ship, slamming the door behind me, and slumping down in the hall with my chest heaving. Nothing bad had happened while I was getting the clothes I'd needed. But, when I'd left, I could only assume that the grubby man hadn't kept his mouth shut. I'd had no idea I was so popular. Or… in one man's case unpopular. Something about destroying his marriage. And then there were those people who were mad at me for 'dying' like that. Like I could help it! What was with that?!
I focused my attention on the snickering coming from the familiar blonde man that was not Cloud. "What happened?" Cid asked.
I couldn't answer right away, it was weird but, I really needed to breathe. They'd made me run that hard. Finally I could force out what had happened in between breaths and conclude with, "Ludicrous!"
"Haha!" Of course Cid laughed. "Had a feeling that would happen."
"Then why didn't you warn me?!" I gasped.
"I dunno." He shrugged. "We'll be leaving in a couple minutes. Why don't you go lie down or something? You've suffered enough."
Geez! What was this? Initiation?! Whatever… I could do that. Just as long as he set course for Cloud. I was really beginning to feel a need for him. It was probably just that his absence was getting to me. I just wanted to hold him. Honest. Perhaps tease him a little, but not in a sexual way. That would be… inappropriate in our current relationship. Obviously I would be respectful and make sure he was comfortable and anybody who may be around was as well. Such as Tifa. Something told me she wouldn't appreciate seeing anything like that happening. Especially since she'd had feelings for him as well. Thank the planet she wasn't a sore loser. Speaking of which…
"Hey Tifa." I said glancing at Vincent. He was just looking at people and things in that eerie way that he did. We all jolted a little as the ship took off. But that was all the reaction there was.
"Zack, are you okay?" She asked. "You don't look so good."
"Nah." I said trying to look chipper and pretend none of that ever happened. "I'm fine."
"Okay." She shrugged.
"Zack." Vincent said surprising us both. How did he always manage to do that? "You need to make a plan. This situation requires it."
Geez. It was all seriousness with him. "I've got it all covered." I said brushing him off. He looked skeptical. "I'm serious. It's covered." I said again. Now they both seemed to question it. "What? You don't trust me?"
"We do." Tifa answered.
"We're just not sure you actually know what you're talking about." Vincent added.
All I could do in response to that was fold my arms and all but pout. "Do you really think I'm that much of an idiot?" I asked. "I'm not really clueless. Perhaps a spaz but… not clueless." It was then that Vincent asked me about the plan again. I just repeated that I had it covered and walked past him. He probably wanted to know what he could do. But I didn't exactly know how he could help yet. Sure I'd made a plan, but it was a bit in progress. I'd need to see the terrain, know where we'd be stationed, and who I had to work with. Sure I knew what the members of AVALANCHE were capable of, but I didn't know how they handled certain situations. How did they handle the remnants? I'd have to give them the game plan when we got there. It wasn't like I could be sure of any plan right now anyway. How did Cloud come up with battle plans for this guy? Did he come up with battle plans when fighting Sephiroth? It wasn't like I could ask him or anything. He wouldn't remember anything about it. Besides, if he were older and not at the point where I had to control myself I'd try to ask him the question and then just lock lips with him.
"Mmm…" The thought made me think of how delicious he was. He needed to come back here and feed my ferocious appetite. I was craving more than just that though. His whole being was something I needed. He brightened the room with his smile, his laugh was contagious, even his frowns had an effect on all the surrounding persons. I'd just like to see the person who could live through one of his pouts without hugging him. Did such a person even exist? It'd be pretty hard for me to believe if someone told me there was. It was just everything about him that made people react in certain, perhaps strange, ways. Even the other cadets who used to pick on him, among other things, were only doing it because he was such a little cutie I'm sure. He was quite the mischievous siren who had the ability to attract even the most powerful people to him. Sadly, a lot of the people that responded he didn't want to. He'd even managed to attract the previously thought to be asexual General to him. Although Sephiroth quickly blew it and they became 'just friends.' "Gyah…" I sighed. "This ship needs to go faster!"
I opened the door to an empty room and quickly shut myself in. I wasn't really up to playing twenty questions with Vincent right now. His… heart (?) was in the right place and all. But I just didn't have the answers. At least not the answers he wanted to hear. I had to come up with something though; just in case he cornered me later on and risked interrupting me on something of another note. Something of equal importance. And for once I wasn't talking about trying to get closer to Cloud. I was prepared for interruptions with that… I think. It wasn't that I'd be okay with it. I just expected it to happen at really crucial points. I'd appreciate it a lot if they didn't, but since when do friends just butt out of relationships? Sephiroth never did. But maybe that was because he'd had an interest in him too. Either way. It was safe to say that friends, even though they meant well, would interfere with something they didn't fully approve of. Even though these guys really didn't have jurisdiction over our relationship because it was there before any of them were even involved. But, again, not the point!
The issue I was really worried about was whether I would be interrupted or not while trying to investigate certain somethings. Such as – it wasn't quite as important but was at the same time – I needed to know who Cloud was with. I doubted I could figure it out, but I had to try. Whoever they were… they were good. They were able to keep their name and number a hidden factor. It wasn't that good I guess. Anyone could make their number private I suppose but… the fact that they wanted to keep their identity a secret was what worried me. What did this someone have to hide that could be given away by something as simple as their name?
"Is Cloud with a criminal as we speak?!" I gasped.
Was my poor little blonde at the mercy of some sicko? Some… some sex offender who could easily pin him down to the cold hard floor? A rapist?! Someone who would push him down on the ground, take complete advantage of his brief state of shock and pin his wrists up over his head; then quickly stop his kicking and flailing by straddling his hips? Completely ignoring his pleas while taking both his wrists in one had and-
"Cut it out!" I hissed while repeatedly smacking a hand to my forehead. "Gaia?! What's wrong with me?!" Why did I keep thinking these awful yet arousing thoughts about Cloud? The worst thing was that they were not only probable but possible! "For shame!" I growled.
How dare I get these dang thoughts stuck in my head of poor little Cloudy being helpless against some grotesque… I didn't even know what. All I knew was that it was wrong of me to think those things! I mean what was I?! A pervert?! Well… maybe in some ways… But I ought to be thinking thoughts about him with me! Why didn't I ever think up fantasies of him and me?! As far as I knew I wasn't one of those people who got turned on by seeing someone else do things to my lover. I was the type that would get pissed if I actually saw it. So why did I keep on thinking about it? I didn't think Sephiroth would even like that. As far as I knew he was the type to freakin' KILL anyone who even so much as tried to touch him. I couldn't say much about the type he was now. Like I knew. I wanted to say I almost… wanted to know. Just a bit of curiosity. But… more than likely he was a sadistic bastard who would do… uh… sadistic… stuff. Which was doing the stuff sadists do… "Don't think about it!" I scolded. "Don't you dare think about it!" That would be the worst thing I could do. If anything it would just tick me off. "Don't you give even the imaginary Sephiroth any pleasure…" I said slumping down on the floor. I had to think of something. I didn't even care what. I just had to stop thinking those thoughts. They were maddening!
"I guess I'm showing plenty of people how weak I am without him…" I sighed. This was not only stupid but it was bad that I obsessed about him even when he was practically as far away from me as possible. How was I supposed to focus on protecting him when he was all I could think about?! "Rrrh! This is so frustrating!" How did I used to do this?! It seemed like it was impossible now but then… "Rah! Angeal…! What do I do about this?!"
There was no response. I guess it was a little much to expect one. It was just like him to stop responding and start forcing me to think on my own… but this soon? Too soon for my liking. I felt like I was going to lose it if I didn't get some help with this. He must've felt it too because he responded soon after that thought crossed my mind.
"Stop panicking." I heard him say. Although I didn't even bother looking for him. I knew I wouldn't find even his counterfeit near by.
"Easier said than done." I groaned.
"No. Now isn't the time for you to start panicking. If everyone panics you know you're in the right to. But right now you're just being ridiculous."
"I know but…"
"You also need to stop relying on me so much. There are people down there that can help you out you know." He paused probably to laugh to himself. "It would make you seem less crazy…"
"I'm not crazy, I'm concerned." I shot back. Even though I knew I sounded crazy. Who didn't sound crazy talking to something that appeared to not be there. Even though it actually was there…
"Relax. I can tell you for a fact that Cloud isn't being held down and tortured as we speak."
"And how would you know that?" I asked. He didn't answer. "You know who it is!" I gasped. "You know who's with him. You know this person?!"
"I never said that." He answered. As though that were going to fix it. "You're so nerved up that you're assuming things." Uh-huh… that could be true. But… "We look after him too, remember?"
"Oh… yeah…" I said looking down at the floor. That was right. He was right. I couldn't help but feel a little stupid for that. But not too much. It was entirely possible that he knew the person who was currently with Cloud. But whatever. I just wished that it were me alone with him. That would've been perfect! But it wasn't so. "I wonder if he misses me…"
"He does…"
After that I felt his presence fade a little. It was as though he'd taken a few steps back. I supposed that meant that he'd cut the connection and wasn't going to talk to me anymore. Okay. Fine by me. The only thing that bothered me was that he left me with 'he does' instead of 'goodbye' or something along that line. Not that I was unhappy to learn that Cloud missed me but it seemed so clichéd. I wasn't even going to try to recollect how many times he'd done something like that to me. All I could do was roll my eyes and try to think about something else. That, unlike other things, would be easy to accomplish. I could do that by looking out the window… Too bad there was no window in this room.
"I wonder how close we are." I mused. Not nearly close enough knowing my luck. One had to hope we'd at least gotten somewhere. It was then that I took the time to marvel at my impatience. I really needed to learn how to wait… Perhaps some other time. This time around my impatience was justified most definitely. After all, it wasn't everyday that my… friend… was being hunted down by a madman. No that was only about half of the time. "Whoa." It really was. It wasn't always Sephiroth but Cloud was often being chased down by madmen. Sephiroth, Hojo, Hollander, Genesis… Interesting. Very interesting. But far from the point. I wasn't completely sure what the matter at hand was exactly. But listing all of the nut jobs in the world wasn't helping it. Perhaps I should've been focusing on the whole Sephiroth deal, but all I could think of was stuff I'd already figured out. There wasn't much else I could do on that topic at this time. It was, admittedly, a pressing matter and I couldn't stop myself from being so anxious about it. However, Angeal was right, freaking out and becoming a total wreck over it wasn't going to save anyone. It was… difficult to keep that in mind but I had to do it. Not for my sake, but more for everybody else. I was sure that they'd do fine without me. It wasn't like I was a necessity to this operation. And even though I knew that I still felt the need to appear somewhat sane in front of everybody. I felt the need to stay strong and pretend things were alright even though I wasn't alright.
"Geez. I'd forgotten how much emotional baggage comes with flesh." I groaned. And that led me to think of what it would feel like to learn that Cloud had been captured by Sephiroth. I found that the thought gave me an ache in my chest so I quickly chased it away. Hopefully I'd never have to feel that ever again. It was devastating. That's all I could describe it as. "Who am I kidding?" I asked. "Sephiroth getting his hands on Cloud? Ludicrous." I snorted. Cloud wasn't an idiot. Of course it might help if I told him that Sephiroth was the one hunting for him. But I couldn't be sure what would happen. Whenever I'd tried to guess I'd only come out with two worse case scenarios. One, he'd think I was crazy and believe any lies Sephiroth told him or he'd all but give up. More than likely the latter. I was more concerned about him finding out that the General wanted to kill him and then pretty much kill himself by losing his drive to live. That would be the worst thing he could do to himself. I couldn't let that happen. And, regrettably, that made it so that I didn't trust him enough to know. If he found out about that I was in trouble. Cloud was a very… delicate being. He always had been. After certain incidents occurred he'd only improved in some areas and worsened in others.
Just thinking it about it made me let out a long sigh. That was Cloud. "Cloudy, Cloud, Cloud…" He was the type of person who often needed to be saved from himself. He had a kind of personality that would badger at every action he took. He would tear himself down at every turn. His personality was just… very unforgiving. "I need to get you back." I said again. Something I needed to stop telling myself and just do. There was the importance and the pressing matters… and then there was my need to have him close. I'd found that even though keeping myself restrained was torturous, it was great for building up anticipation. Something that made me want to force him to at least tell me how he felt. That would make things so much easier. "Perhaps I shouldn't try so hard to hide my feelings?" Even though I didn't think I had been. Not too much anyway. Maybe… "No." Keep it as is.
--
I couldn't even tell how much time had passed. All I knew was that we were close to North Corel and I was on the edge of my seat. I must've been spacing for hours because I couldn't remember much of anything before this point. What did it matter anyway?! I was so freaked, so… high off of the building adrenaline that I was about ready to jump out of the airship myself! Which, at this point, I probably would. "I wonder how much longer…" I murmured as I fidgeted in the corner of the bridge.
"Can't you wait a few more minutes?" I heard Tifa ask almost laughing.
I looked up and tried to stop myself from fidgeting, a task that proved to be harder than one would think. But I managed to put a little bit of restraint on myself so as to not appear crazy. "I can try." I answered managing to keep my grin from showing itself. "Can you?"
"I can manage about two more minutes." She said glancing out a nearby window.
"Bravo…" I sighed. "Wish I could."
"What's there to worry about? He's not alone." Tifa said in a consoling manner.
"You trust this… person he's with?" I asked. I wasn't so sure it was a criminal anymore. It was more likely that one of Sephiroth's remnants had found him and then sent me that message to throw us off their trail. Why hadn't I thought of that before? I guess that proved how messed up my mind got when Cloud was involved. Sephiroth was probably laughing at me for it. Even though I'd counted that as a failure in one category, I'd succeeded in making everyone else question whether or not to believe in the unknown, unnamed, escort. I also noticed that their heart rates increased once I'd asked. Perhaps I'd uncovered some pent up doubts and frustrations? Oh well. They'd be just as relieved when we found him if that were the case.
"Sorry." I said realizing I'd probably just broke down everyone's optimism. Something that probably took Tifa hours to build.
"Cid." Vincent said suddenly. "Land the ship here. We shouldn't get too close to the town."
"Right." The pilot answered.
That point must've been the peak of my impatience thus far. To me, the ship couldn't land fast enough. I could only hope that Cloud was somewhere nearby. But more than likely he wasn't. I suppose the center of town wasn't the best place to hide. But whatever. Thankfully North Corel wasn't a big place, so there'd be a small number of areas he could potentially be. And, with that in mind, I was planning on taking off straight for the inn as soon as I could. That would be the smartest place to look. "C'mon." I mumbled. Time itself seemed to slow down as I watched the landscape overtake the sky through the window pane. But after what seemed like minutes I felt the ship shudder as it landed and I bolted.
"Zack!" I heard Tifa shout but I didn't stop.
I ran straight to the airlock and did everything I could not to rip the door off its hinges. Instead I pulled down the handle and tapped it. Turns out, with all the built up adrenaline, that was all that was necessary. With that single tap the door swung open and I jumped out and took off into town. At this point I was unstoppable. I felt like I'd knock out anyone who tried to get in my way. It was a very dangerous state of mind I knew. But I felt it was needed. Mostly because I was angry at myself for falling asleep for three days and letting him fall out the damn airlock! I felt as though there should've been some sort of consequence for that. "Whatever…" I sighed. I'd rather focus on more positive things for the time being. For instance, the inn was coming closer into view. That meant that I was getting closer to Cloud. That was always good.
"Hey you, what're you doing?" Somebody asked as I walked into the small hovel of an inn.
"I'm looking for somebody." I answered peering into one of the two rooms. Both were empty. "Has there been a small spiky haired blonde staying here?"
"Uhh…" Geez. They had to think about it?! Cloud was easy to spot. The thought of anyone missing him, even in a crowd, was ludicrous! "Yes. He was here. But he left a little while ago."
"Where'd he go?" I asked. There must've been an obvious sense of desperation in my voice because it pained them to give me an 'I dunno' look. But I got it. "Alright… umm… was there anyone else?" Perhaps I could get a clue as to who this mysterious 'person' was.
"I didn't check them in so all I know is that he left with a silver haired man."
"Thanks." I said dashing out the door. That was all I needed to hear. Silver hair meant bad man. Needless to say I'd already picked up the blonde's scent; so I already had an idea of where to go next. But it wasn't that simple. He'd been everywhere in this town. I'd have to try to distinguish which scent was the freshest. "Huh…" Was it just me, or had I been overworking my nose lately?
"AUGH!!!" Someone yelled out at the eastern border of town.
"Well… there's that." I shrugged and took off towards the source.
--
It didn't take me long to get out there. And I was a little curious as to why none of the others had followed me, but I wasn't going to let it bother me. Whatever was out there, I could definitely handle. I was expecting anything. Monsters, remnants, anything. What I found first… was a chocobo. But not just any chocobo. A green mountain chocobo. It was the cutest little thing , but what was it doing here?
"Kweh?" It chirped.
"Whatcha doing out here?" I asked kneeling down and letting it sniff my hand.
"Wark!" It screeched hopping up and down.
"Are you… trying to tell me something?" I asked. That was weird. I didn't know Lassie was a chocobo.
"Kweh." It replied turning and starting to leave. I stood in the same place for a moment scratching the back of my head. I could've sworn that bird just nodded before it walked off. "Wark!" It screeched again while jumping up so I could see it.
"Okay. Okay. I'm following you." I said striding after it.
Where was this bird supposed to be leading me? It couldn't be a trap. Sephiroth didn't have the patience to train a chocobo like this just to kill someone. He'd always gone for the more direct approach. I quickly snapped myself back to reality when I noticed the bird had quickened its pace. Soon after, I heard a series of gunshots and then another shout, then… silence. I then started picking up an accelerated heart rate and labored breathing. The sound was familiar. Very familiar. A noise that I knew only as one particularly beautiful blonde panting. He was especially gorgeous when he was losing his breath in a fit of euphoria… I felt my lips twist up into a smirk; but I had to wipe it away when I saw blonde spikes coming into view. I never knew relief could feel so good!
"Cloud!" I shouted running towards him. That drew his attention away from something else. I wondered what, but it was then that I was overtaken by the smell of fresh blood. There were a few drips of it everywhere and occasionally a small puddle. "Cloud, are you okay?" I asked checking him over. There weren't any injuries I could see. Well none that he didn't already have. Wait a second. "What're you wearing?" It looked like a jockey slash viscount slash Lloyd sort of thing. I didn't know what to call it. But whatever it was it was cute and definitely not what Tifa told me he was wearing. This was better.
"I'm fine and… please don't ask." He said picking something up. Something that smelled heavily of blood. I couldn't see what it was though.
"There are bullets everywhere…" They were all over the ground, some were bent, others were melted, and some of them were even cut in half.
"Can I explain this at a better time?" Cloud groaned. He sounded tired.
I watched him wipe off and pocket whatever he'd picked up before I'd decided it was okay to invade his personal space. "You sure you're okay?" I asked picking him up so his feet were dangling. It felt as though he were struggling for some reason, but I wasn't ready to put him down yet. It was too soon.
"Yes." He answered in an almost whining tone. That was odd. But okay. I set him down just as he'd started kicking.
"But the blood?"
"It's not mine." He said jumping up and wrapping his arms around my neck. That was a surprise. But then he started kicking again. What did he…? Oh… wait… He wasn't kicking. He was trying to swing his legs up so that I was cradling him. I see. I could do that.
Who could even think of bringing harm to this little sweetheart? I asked myself as I obliged in his rather odd request. He must've really missed me. I felt the arms around my neck tighten slightly as he squeezed. Gaia, he was beginning to act like the little kitten I'd loved with such a passion. Not that he had to act that way for me to love him. He was just… arousing some thoughts. But I was no idiot. I knew that he wasn't ready for that yet. I was just enjoying his company for now. Something I'd been without for days. And even though I was asleep for most of it, it still killed me to know that he wasn't close by my side. But instead he was probably in mid-peril for the length of it. I gently rubbed his back to keep myself from doing anything else. And as I did, he looked up at me with confusion in his eyes. He was so cute! But I wasn't going to do anything more. We could stay like this. I didn't even care how long. We could stay like this forever if he wanted to. At least, that's what it felt like. But I guess he had other plans because he made me go crazy when I felt his skin on mine. It took me a second to register what he was doing. Since the only thing this outfit kept uncovered was his head. G-Gaia! He was nuzzling me! Why was he doing that and what did I care?
But then he stopped. I couldn't imagine why. As far as I knew I was returning his affections. But still, he waited. It were as though he were thinking something over. He was taking forever. I couldn't wait much longer. What was this? Karma finally biting me for all those times I used to tease him? The anticipation was coming back. I knew either he would make the next move or I would. I just hated to be left hanging. I felt him move and then…
"Wha…" Was all I could muster when I felt the light little pecking touch of his lips on my cheek.
My face went blank once I'd realized what he'd done. But then my surprise melted into something better. An emotion that I couldn't even name my mind was so gone. I only recognized the warmth welling up from my core to the surface. My face must've been red because he gasped as though he'd done something wrong. But I couldn't make myself say anything to let him know he'd done absolutely no wrong. I couldn't speak. My voice was gone.
"Zack?" I heard him ask. But I couldn't even move to look at him. "Zack, what…?" He was cut off by something and I'd noticed it too. But I couldn't do anything to stop it. I was going down. "Zack!" He shouted as I fell backwards.
--
"Zack, are you okay?!" I heard the blonde ask.
"Hmm?" What just happened? I felt something trapped in my arms and wriggling to get free. It took a second for me to realize it was Cloud. "What's wrong?"
"You blacked out." He answered. "And now you won't let me go." I tightened my grip when he tried to pull free again. "Zack." He whined.
I didn't answer. Instead I rolled over so that he was pinned on his back and I was looking down at him. He cringed and shuddered while snapping his eyes shut and looking away. It were as though he were bracing himself for something. I wondered what. But then the answer came. It was faint, but he was mumbling a plea for me to not do something. Then I remembered. The other boys in the barracks used to pin him down and spit/drool on his face. Disgusting. I couldn't blame him for his reaction. And, tough as it was, it was a clear indication that I needed to stop what I was doing. So I stood up very slowly and then stepped back.
"Sorry, Zack, I didn't mean to make you mad." He said in a very apologetic voice.
"No. Don't be sorry. You didn't do anything wrong." I answered while re-approaching him. "I thought I did to be completely honest." What would make him think kissing me was doing wrong? "I guess I did get a little carried away though." Whoops. My bad. But this was a good thing. He kissed me. It may not have been anything more than a peck but he still kissed me! And that was the best thing ever!
Before I knew it, he was in my arms again. I couldn't remember if I'd grabbed him or if he came to me but that wasn't important. All that mattered was now. I leaned in really close and gave him the same light brush of a kiss on his cheek. As expected, his face lit up with a blush. It made him look so adorable that my mind flew off again and I squeezed him in a hug.
… A part of me heard the others calling for us from a ways off. But I ignored it, pulled the blonde closer, and buried my face in his hair. He was so soft. And his hair was so feathery and silky. Still they called. But they were going away from us. Good. They could take their time finding us.
--
(A/N) Aw… aint that nice? And sorry again for posting this so late. It took me a long time to get thins one the way I wanted it. And I'm still not entirely sure I'm satisfied with it. But oh well… hope you guys like it.
P.S. A big thumbs up to anyone who can tell me where Lloyd comes from and why he was even mentioned. I only ask that you don't cheat and look it up please.
Thank you. Hopefully next chapter is out sooner but I wouldn't expect it before school starts. I can't make any promises. But I'll definitely try.