I don't own How To Train Your Dragon, I'm just a fan :)

Hand on my Heart

Chapter 4

"Well, I thought the answer would be obvious." Astrid giggled. She decided that giggling would be more Viking like than bursting into tears. She may not have loved Hiccup long to the casual observer, but they knew nothing. The thing nobody knew was that she had secretly liked him for years. When they heard the news that Hiccup's mother and Astrid's father were likely dead, they had bonded over it. They may have only been eleven years old but it was significant to her. Nobody had offered her even a word of comfort when he'd found her sobbing in the woods. At first she'd told him to get lost but he told her that if anyone could understand, it was him. They'd cried together that day and she'd let him cuddle her. Berk had always been a place where everyone knew everything about everyone and yet he'd never told a soul about it. It would have been quite a feat for him as well, letting the village know that the ice queen Astrid had cried... and yet he didn't. She'd harboured feelings for him since then. Although, she kept her distance and it crushed her every time she saw someone pick on him.

She had her own quiet way of extracting revenge on those people. If it was Snotlout, she'd punch him extra hard. If it was an adult, she'd find a way to humiliate them so they would know the feeling. Eventually, the village eased up slightly on their ridicule of him as they all understood it themselves now. She never acted upon her feelings for him purely because of her father. He had wanted her to be a shield maiden and that meant no husband for her. It all changed when Hiccup had taken her on that flight she would never forget. She had fought her feelings for him so fiercely; she ended up coming across as cold. She used to daydream about scenarios where things would be different. It didn't bother her remotely what people thought of him or what they thought of her for wanting him. She always figured that if she were with him, she could easily take care of anyone that dared say anything about him... After all, she had been doing it for years.

When he had faced the Red Death, she was sure that she had lost him. That moment where Stoick had announced that he was alive, she made a promise to herself that she would no longer let her father control her life. After all, what parent wouldn't want their child to be happy?

"Right." Hiccup looked down at his feet and she noticed him deflate. She laughed again.

"You are so stupid. Of course I will." She smiled at him and his head snapped up.

"I... I... I..." He stuttered.

"Just kiss me, Hiccup." And he did. It was the first time he had ever kissed her, even if she told him to do it. She pulled away and rested her forehead on his. "You can kiss me whenever you want." He smiled at her widely and gently embraced her. It aggravated her that he still seemed to walk on eggshells around him. "Hiccup? Why are you so cautious around me?" She asked confused. He hesitated for a moment then took a step back.

"Astrid... please... don't take this the wrong way... I'm not used to you talking to me, let alone telling me that you want to be with me. It's just very... sudden." He said apologetically and she huffed with frustration. Of course she could see his point but it still frustrated her. If she ever saw her father again, even if it was in Valhalla, she was going to punch him right in the nose.

"Hiccup, I guess it's time I told you the truth." She grew nervous. "I've loved you ever since that first day in the woods." He hesitated for a moment and considered what she had said.

"That was all Toothless' doing, not mine." He said to her honestly and her jaw dropped. Did he not remember?

"Not that day, Hiccup. The first day we ever spent in the woods." She said more firmly. If he didn't remember she was going to smack him silly. Realisation shadowed his face; then it grew grim.

"You mean when our parents..." He started.

"Yes." She nodded.

"So... all these years... I tried to talk to you and you ignored me..." He looked broken.

"I was trying to keep a promise." She said.

"To who?" He asked confused. She told him her story. She spilled her heart out and he only looked more and more shocked.

"You're not really going to punch your dad in Valhalla are you?" He asked shocked.

"Yes! Is that all you took from what I said?" She snapped.

"It's just a lot to process. I don't really have words to tell you what I think about it." He told her honestly.

"Well, you think about it and get back to me." She said dryly and he nodded. He turned his back to her and started packing up Toothless. He couldn't face her or she would see the tears that streamed down his face. He started thinking about everything she had just revealed to him. He was shocked at her carefree attitude regarding the other villagers. He was a failure as a Viking and he knew it. He wanted to be better for her but didn't know how. All he knew was that she deserved better but he wasn't about to let her go either. He came to the conclusion that he could be that man for her, but it would take time and a great deal of effort. He also knew there was only one person that could or would help him with this.

He saddled Toothless once he was finished packing up the belongings he had taken with him. When he was sure that his face wouldn't give away his tears he turned back to her and saw that she was already packed and sitting on her dragon. Waiting for him. What he was about to do, could make or break them... but it was worth it. She was worth it. She deserved it. He bent down to Toothless' ear and whispered.

"Can you do me a favour?" He asked his friend. Toothless nodded in agreement. "Thanks bud, when I tell you, can you tell Bluefly to take Astrid back to Berk? She won't go if I ask her to and I need some time." He explained to the dragon. Toothless gave him a quizzical look but nodded his agreement. He jumped on Toothless' back and strapped himself in.

"Ready?" Astrid asked him.

"Ready." He said sadly and she raised an eyebrow at him but he'd already taken off so she followed quickly. After a few minutes, she was riding beside him in the air. "Astrid?" Hiccup called to her.

"Yeah?" She asked.

"I just want you to know that I love you and I'll be back for you as soon as I'm ready. I just need some time and you don't deserve to suffer because of it. Please forgive me." He said to her and she felt the panic rise within her.

"What are you talking about?" She asked frantically.

"I'll understand if you move on." He said to her.

"What?" She shrieked.

"Now, bud." He patted Toothless' neck and Toothless started warbling to Bluefly. She looked at Hiccup and warbled back to Toothless then banked left and started heading towards Berk. In the distance, Hiccup could hear Astrid's voice.

"What are you doing, Hiccup? I'm so going to kick your ass!" She continued shouting but Hiccup could no longer hear her.

"Thanks, Toothless." Hiccup said to his best friend. Toothless crooned back to him sadly. "I know, bud. I just need to be better for her. She deserves that. We'll go back one day. But today isn't that day."

Hiccup contemplated everything Astrid had told him. That essentially she had been in love with him as long as he had loved her; she was just better at hiding it. It baffled him as much as it warmed him. He felt less alone knowing that he had always had someone in his corner, even if she was his silent avenger. It embarrassed him slightly that she had been sticking up for him for nearly six years without anyone ever knowing it. He knew that he screwed up a lot and people had stopped being downright cruel to him, even if they were still exasperated by him. He just felt that if he was going to be Astrid's husband one day, which at this point was a big If... he would have to be a Viking. A real Viking. He would go back to her one day and if she had moved on, he would be happy for her. But if by some miracle she was waiting for him, he'd be the best husband and father possible and would make her proud.

Hiccup watched the land masses below him until he found the one he wanted. Toothless landed in the forest near the village and was told in no uncertain terms only to come to the village if called. He didn't need a repeat of what happened in Berk happening here. He made his way to the village and marched straight to the Chief's house and knocked. He smiled at the face he was greeted with.

"Hiccup?" She shouted elatedly while grabbing him in a big hug, which was strange given her size.

"You know for a little lady you've really got some grip, Cami." He laughed.

"Shut up, Haddock." She smiled as she let go.

"I missed you." He laughed.

"Well get in here!" She said loudly and ushered him in. He followed her over to the seating area in her and her mother's house. "So are the rumours I've been hearing true?" She asked.

"It depends what you heard." He laughed. He had missed his friend. She was the only person that he had ever truly considered a friend before Toothless, but she lived so far away that he hardly ever got to see her.

"That you befriended a Night Fury and killed a dragon that was controlling them all!"

"Oh... that rumour. Well... that's true." He blushed a little. He hadn't realised that anyone outside of Berk knew about that.

"Well where the hell is he?" She smiled. "Is he a he?"

"Yes." He chuckled. "He's waiting for me in the woods behind your house. I figured we'd cause a ruckus if we just landed right in the middle of the village."

"Probably. Though, I'm in charge here till my mother gets back. Did you see her in Berk?" She asked and Hiccup frowned.

"No. Nobody even told me that she was there."

"Yeah, she was going there to talk to your dad about the dragon raids. We haven't had any since the day before she left. I take it that's because of you." She smiled.

"They're really friendly normally." Hiccup agreed. He wasn't one to brag.

"I was supposed to be going but Bertha has decided that she wants me to be Chief when I turn eighteen so I have to start learning. We argued about it of course, I told her she could send me to Berk instead of her so I could see you, but she pulled rank of course." Camicazi scowled.

"I thought you wanted to be Chief?" He asked her.

"I do. I just thought she would wait till I was a little bit older so I could have some fun before being burdened with it. Wait... Why aren't you in Berk?" She asked suspiciously and Hiccup's smile fell.

"Well, I'm actually here to ask for your help." He said to her.

Almost two years later:

Astrid was walking home with her wet and newly cleaned clothing and linen when she overheard some of the villagers getting excited. She ignored it of course. She had a tough time of it since the day her Nadder brought her home and she had become somewhat solitary. Everyone had tried to convince her to move on... That he would never return. It was too painful for her to think his name or hear it. She regretted everything about that day. She should have known that he would do something like that. He never did have much common sense. What she regretted most, was telling her mother and the Chief that Hiccup had proposed to her and said he would be back. The Chief was overjoyed as was Astrid's mother. But the months passed and soon both her mother and Hiccup's father encouraged her to accept marriage contracts elsewhere. But Astrid point blank refused. She knew Hiccup would come back for her and if he didn't – well there was nobody else for her. Needless to say, her mother was worried. It wasn't until she heard Gobber speak that her interest peaked. She didn't turn to him though; she just slowed her steps slightly.

"What is that?" Gobber asked while looking to the clouds. "No... It can't be!" He shouted excitedly. "It's... NIGHT FURY!" Astrid's head snapped up to the clouds and she saw it. A Night Fury... And not just any Night Fury...