Fighting Back

Chapter 33

Nicole decided to take Gemma's advice to pack up her shit and leave the Clubhouse.

She wasn't exactly sure what had happened to cause Happy to flip on her like and quite frankly she didn't care. Happy was a grown a man and if he really didn't want anything more to do with her then she wasn't going to breakdown and cry or beg him to reconsider she was never going to let herself sink that low.

So with that in mind Nicole started packing away her belongings. She was halfway through packing when she heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." She called out as she continued her packing. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Jax walk in.

"You packing?"

"Yeah, think it's about time I moved back to yours, if that's okay?" She asked giving Jax her full attention as he moved towards her.

"Course it is. You okay?" Nicole smirked to herself only Jax could tell that something was bothering her even though she had her Gemma style game face on.

"Yes...No..."

"What's wrong."

"Nothing, I'm fine really, just had a busy morning." Jax's interest peaked. He couldn't help but wonder if Happy had a word with her like he'd asked.

"How come?" Nicole looked at him, a little confused why he was so interested, especially considering the day they had in front of him.

"Well first I got woken up at the crack of dawn, then I went to help Gemma but that ended up with us arguing and then to top it all off..." Nicole shut her mouth when she realised what she was about to say. She really didn't need Jax knowing about her and Happy's little arrangement as far as Jax was concerned he still liked to think of her as a virgin.

"What...What topped it off?"

"Maybe the fact that I know I'm gonna be losing my cousin by the end of the day." Jax pulled her into a hug.

"I'm only going inside."

"Only." Nicole scoffed.

"I'm gonna be okay." He pulled away so he could look into her eyes. "We're going to be okay, you just have to trust me."

"I always trust you."

"And I need you to promise me something."

"What's that?"

"Don't run." Now Nicole was truly lost.

"What do yo..."

"No matter what happens today don't leave, don't run away." She pulled out of his hold.

"Jay what are you talking about, is there something I should know?"

"Just promise me."

"Okay." Jax bent down and kissed her on the cheek before running his hand over her hair.

"I've gotta go, me and Clay have got to go and see Otto."

"How come?"

"Deal we made when we were in Belfast. Need to find Jimmy, Russians are hiding him. We need Otto to talk with Lenny the Pimp, he has connections that might her us get a location." Nicole nodded. "Look as glad as I am about you moving back home, will you do me a favour and stay close today." Nicole rolled her eyes, that was the last thing she wanted to do.

"Jay..."

"Please Nic..."

"Fine, but I have to pop out for a bit and that's non negotiable but I swear when I'm done I'll come back."

"Okay, just make sure you take your gun."

"Always do, it's in my purse next to my lip gloss." Jax shook his head at her.

"I'll catch you later." He walked over to the door but before he left he turned back to look at her. "You sure you okay?"

"Perfect." Although he smiled at her and she smiled back he wasn't convinced. The way her smiled didn't reach her eyes told him she was not okay, and for the first time that morning Jax doubted himself.

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After packing up the rest of her belongings she placed her bags by the door ready to take later. She grabbed her purse and leather jacket before heading out of the door, but unfortunately she barley managed to step a foot outside Jax's room before she got pushed back inside.

"What the..."

"He didn't vote me in." Nicole dropped her head unable to look at him. She felt to guilty.

"Koz if you've come here..."

"I thought we were passed all this shit." He shouted getting closer to her.

"We are, it's just..."

"If you don't want me around fine, but you're messing with the club here..."

"Gemma knows." Nicole snapped causing Koz to stand in front of her with his mouth gaping. "She doesn't know it's you but I didn't want to risk it. If Clay and Jay find out you know they will kill you."

"Shit." Kozik ran his hand over his face.

"That's why I asked Tig not to vote you in. If your not around there's less chance she'll find out."

"When they guy's go inside you know there's a chance that I might get voted in anyway."

"Then say no, say you changed your mind."

"You don't get it Nic the Mother Charter asks you to do something you do it." Kozik slammed his fist down onto the dresser. "Fuck."

"I'm so sorry Koz." He turned to look at her.

"Not all down to is it. Takes two right?" Nicole smiled sympathetically. She knew this was just as hard on him as it was on her.

"Maybe I could try talking to her."

"Nah, I've gotta take responsibility for what I did." Nicole could tell that this hurt him, so she walked over to him and ran her hand down his arm. He turned to look at her before pulling her against him, hugging her tightly. He knew she was trying to do best, trying to stop any shit blowing back on him and for that he had to respect her.

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After visiting the store Nicole pulled up outside the cemetery. She grabbed the bunches of flowers, two bunches of yellow carnations and a bunch of white roses, her usual choice from the passenger seat before walking through the iron gates.

She made a quick stop at her Mom and Dad graves where she laid the two bunches of yellow carnations in front of their gravestones. She placed a kiss upon each of their graves and told them she loved them before moving onto her second stop. When she arrived at Michael's grave she did exactly the same thing. Placed a kiss on top of his gravestone before moving the dead flowers from his grave and replacing them with the bunch of white roses. She stared at his name for a moment or two before she moved on.

As she stood in front of his grave Nicole's eyes went to the two rings resting on top his gravestone she recognised them immediately as Jax's. She shook head before sitting down.

She couldn't believe that less than a month ago she had found Jax slumped against this gave as he sobbed, he had came here like she had done so often with her Mom and Dad's grave, to hope for some sort of guidance. But she now failed to see how this man could ever guide Jax.

"You were meant to be different." She said finally finding her voice. "Your the only person who Jay could trust, he looked up to you so much through his life, put you of a fucking pedestal and all..." Nicole took a deep breath. "All this fucking time you had another family. A kid with someone else." Nicole couldn't look at him any more so she decided now was a good time to leave. She wiped her tears before they even had a chance to fall.

"I'm done. The only people we can count on is ourselves. I just hope your finally happy." She stared at the grave for a moment before she threw the single white rose that she took from Michaels bunch of flowers onto the ground. "Goodbye John."

As Nicole made her way from John's grave she somehow found herself standing back in front of her Mom's grave.

"How the hell did I get her Mom?" She asked as she knelt down on the grass. "I could really use you right now Mom." Nicole didn't know what took over her but she completely lost it and started balling her eyes out. "I..ne...need you." She cried.

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Nicole stopped her car just outside Teller/Morrow. When she had finally stopped crying, Nicole finally started to see things clearly.

Something was missing, and it had been for a long time. She thought returning to Charming would fix that, that the hole inside of her was because she had missed her family and at first they did fill that aching whole inside her but that quickly passed and as the shit started hitting the fan again she felt the familiar emptiness. And today after staring at the two gravestones that were placed side by side Nicole finally figured out what it was. Love, happiness.

Her Dad had died of a broken heart. Of course according to the Doctors it was the booze that killed him, and they were right the booze did kill her dad. When he started drinking the dad she knew and loved disappeared and she was left with this broken shell of a man who had turned into a nasty violent bitter drunk. Which only proved to Nicole that he died when her Mom did.

She didn't want to leave her family, she loved them more than anything but if recent events had proven anything to her it was that she was never going to be able to find them things here. Life in Charming was just to hard.

The guys were going inside, trouble would be kept at bay. Tara was expecting a baby, which meant Gemma would be busy playing Grandma. And she would be stuck here in Charming doing...doing nothing.

No Nicole's mind was made up she was doing this, by the end of the day she was leaving Charming.

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"Nicole." Nicole turned to see Gemma standing in the doorway of the office. "Inside now." Nicole rolled her eyes as she started to walk towards the office.

"Yeah." She asked as she crossed her arms across her chest as she leant against the filing cabinet.

"So where have you been?" Gemma asked as she took a drag from her cigarette as she sat in the chair behind her desk.

"Around." Nicole answered simply.

"You've been crying." Gemma stated as she noticed the red rims round Nicole's eye.

"No." Gemma knew she was lying.

"Sit." Gemma motioned to chair on the opposite side of the desk. She noticed that Nicole was about to walk away. "That wasn't a request darlin." Nicole huffed as she sat down.

"What's this about Gemma?"

"I know it was Koz who you slept with." Nicole went to open her mouth to say something but Gemma cut her off. "Don't even bother to try and lie to me." Nicole expected Gemma to be angry but as she looked into her eyes it wasn't anger she saw it was guilt. "Tig told me everything."

"Gem..I..." Nicole was completely caught off guard when Gemma moved from her side of the desk and pulled her into a hug.

"I'm not saying I agree but I understand. I know it happened the night Clay..."

Gemma couldn't even finish her sentence. If she was honest she had never forgiven herself for that night. She should never have let Clay lay a hand on her. After all the shit with her Dad Nicole put all her trust into her, trusted her to protect her, and Gemma had let her down that night.

She knew Clay was sorry, the weeks of making up, buying Nicole gifts had proven that but to Nicole that made no difference because Gemma had allowed it and she knew that hurt Nicole more than anything else and she was the one who had to apologise but she never did.

"Hit me." Nicole spoke finishing off her sentence as she pulled away from her.

"I never really apologised for that did I?" Nicole shook her head as a tear rolled down her face. "I'm sorry Baby." Gemma wiped her tear before hugging her again, this time she felt Nicole hug her back tightly.

"I love you."

"I love you to Gem."

After a long hug and a quick check that their makeup was still intact from the their tears the two of them made their inside the Clubhouse where they were greeted by Ally Lowen who was sitting at the bar.

"Everything okay?" Gemma asked as she took a seat next to her.

"We'll soon find out."

"You want some coffee?" Nicole asked as she made her way to the kitchen.

"Sure." Ally knew the boys had some big numbers to crunch so she had plenty of time.

######################

"20 equals zero that means Lenny couldn't get a location." Piney said from the end of the table.

"The others are longitude and latitude." Juic spoke from behind his laptop.

"2 million means we can by Jimmy." Clay stated.

"2 Million SHIT." Chibs shouted.

"We should just show up and take Jimmy we've got enough hardware." Tig shouted in frustration.

"That's not gonna be the location of the safe house it's going to be a location for an exchange, trust me. Putlova will be bringing an army." Booby answered to Tig's suggestion.

"Yeah looks like an access road off Rio Vista. 40 minutes."

"Clay where the hell are we going to get two million?" Jax asked flicking the ash from his cigarette into the ash tray.

"How much funds do we have?" Clay asked Bobby who was the clubs treasurer.

"Nowhere near enough."

"I know someone." Clay and Jax turned to look at Kozik who was standing behind Happy.

"What do you mean?" Jax questioned.

"He makes counterfeit cash."

"You think he could manage to make two mill by today."

"I'll call him." Clay nodded to Kozik. He left to room to make the call.

"You think this will work?" Bobby asked Clay who shrugged at him.

"Depends how good it is. Russians have a good eye."

They all looked up at the double doors when Kozik entered the room.

"So?" Clay asked.

"Yeah he can do it but he can only make bout 1.7 which means were gonna need to pad it out and he said it's not gonna be perfect."

"Where we gonna find 3 grand?" Opie asked.

"I have an idea." Jax said with a smug smile on his face.

"Okay." Clay looked to Jax "You organise that shit." He turned to Koz. "You give your guy the go ahead. Take Tig and Hap with you to pick it up." He then turned to Opie. "Op tell Lowen the equations true."

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As Opie walked out of the Chapel he went straight over to Ally. "Tell them it's true."

"Okay." Ally took one last swig of her coffee before saying her goodbyes to Gemma and Nicole.

"What's that about?" Nicole asked.

"Don't know, but I'm sure we'll find out." Gemma turned in her seat to face her niece. "What do you have planned for the rest off the day?"

"Nothing now, Jax wants me to stay close today." Gemma cocked an eyebrow.

"He does?"

"Yeah. Gem is everything alright with him, right?" Gemma wasn't really sure how to answer her because Gemma didn't know.

"Yeah why?"

"Nothing just being stupid, I'm sure it's nothing."

"He's probably just worrying about leaving you alone considering everything you've been through lately. You know how protective he is of you." Gemma said hoping to reassure her. The last thing she wanted to do was to tell her what she really thought was going on, she knew Nicole couldn't handle that information right now.

"Probably, but you know I can cope on my own." Gemma reached out for Nicole's hand.

"I'm sure you can but you'll never have to find out because your always going to have me around." Nicole smiled at Gemma, but she couldn't help but feel the pang of guilt inside. She knew if she was ever going to leave Charming she wouldn't be able to tell Gemma because she would somehow manage to convince her to stay. And Nicole couldn't stay.

Both Nicole and Gemma's attention turned to the double doors when the rest of the guys started to filter out.

Nicole saw Tig heading to his room and decided to take advantage of this. Slipping off her stool she made her made down the hall. Knocking on his door she waited for him to answer.

"Yeah." She heard him holler from behind the closed door. Taking that as her cue to enter she opened the door and walked inside to see Tig changing his shirt. "Wondered when..."

"You told her?" Tig nodded.

"I had to Nic it was the only way she would keep her mouth shut. She said something to you?" Tig asked as he buttoned up his shirt. Nicole took a seat on his bed.

"Yeah but to be honest she was okay, actually she finally apologised for letting Clay hit me that night. That was something I never thought would happen." Tig joined her on the bed.

"That's good sweetheart."

"Yeah it is?"

"So heard your fucking the killer now." Nicole's head snapped towards Tig, who had a smug smile on his face.

"Seriously, who told you that?"

"Your aunt." Nicole shook her head.

"Well go on lets get this over and done with."

"What?"

"Tell me that I'm being silly that I'm acting like a whore and he's no good for me."

"Ain't gonna hear any of that from me doll."

"Really. Because I thought after Koz..." Tig raised his finger at her.

"That shit was different you were a kid, your adult now your allowed to make your own choices."

"Yeah well whatever it was it's over now."

"Shame." Nicole was confused she never really expected the conversation to go this way.

"What?"

"I know you had a bit of thing going with the retard..."

"Juice. His name is Juice Tig." Tig laughed.

"Yeah whatever...what I am saying is that never seemed right to me don't get me wrong I like the kid he just wasn't for you."

"And Happy is?" Nicole scoffed.

"Maybe. He just ain't good at relationship shit just give him time. The fact that he came back to you more than once proves there's something more..."

"Or I'm just a great lay." Tig laughed as he wrapped his arm over her shoulder.

"That I don't doubt. Seriously though that guy cares for you always has."

"I know, never doubted that. I just..." Nicole sighed. "Look I'm not looking to be his old lady or anything like that, I just...Happy's been part of my life forever I don't want him to hate me."

"Trust me he could never hate you."

"You didn't see him today TIg, he was different..." Nicole's hand subconsciously moved to cover the finger marks on her arm that Happy had left. She shook her head. "I'm to blame really I shouldn't have pushed him."

"Hey don't go blaming yourself, Hap's a grown ass man he's responsible for his own actions."

"I guess." She kissed him on the cheek.

"What was that for?"

"For being so great." She said smiling at him sweetly. "I'll miss you."

"We're only going inside, you know you can visit." Nicole nodded.

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Jax made his way into Stahl's office. She spun around to face him.

"I hope you have some good news for me."

"Putlova wants 2 mill for Jimmy." Jax told her as walked over to her desk.

"Jesus Christ."

"We've got our hands on some counterfeit cash, but I've got to pad it out with real bills. Buy us some time to get Jimmy out of there."

"Where did you get the counterfeit cash?"

"Not your worry. I need money."

"How much?"

"300 grand."

"Not much then." Stahl remarked sarcastically.

"Can you get it or not?"

"When do you need it by?"

"This afternoon."

"We're going to be there, at the exchange."

"No, noway. If the Russians see you they will kill Jimmy and if my Club sees you they'll know someone ratted, we can't take that risk."

"Well in that case no cash." Jax ran his hand over his face.

"Fine, I'll give you the location. But you've got to hang back a few miles at least."

"Okay."

"We'll put Jimmy in the van. You send in your team pretend your after the Russians. Let us go and grab Jimmy."

"Fair enough I'll set it up."

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Stahl had come through and managed to get Jax the cash. He carried the bag into the Clubhouse later that afternoon just as the guys were packing the fake money into two large duffel bags.

Jax dropped his bag on top of the pool table, next to a bag that was full of various guns."3 Grand."

"Good work." Clay said patting him on the back.

"We ready?"

"Yeah, just need to discuss something with you."

"What?"

"I've asked Nicole to help us."

"Why?" Jax asked angrily.

"Need someone to drive the car."

"Can't a prospect do it?"

"No, we are gonna need as many bodies as we can get are hands on, plus she offered her services."

"Where is she?"

"In your dorm." Jax started walking to his room. "Don't try changing her mind on this we need her."

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Jax leant against the door frame. He watched as Juice walked Nicole through what she had to. He obviously said something funny because Nicole seemed to laugh at him. Jax smiled he missed the sound of her laugh.

"Hey." Both Juice and Nicole turned to face Jax. Juice made an excuse and left the room leaving the two of them alone.

"Before you say anything Jax I offered to do this."

"I know, didn't come to try and talk you out of it."

"Good."

"You understand what you need to do."

"Yeah Juice filled me in."

"I won't let anything happen to out there." He told her as he came to stand in front of her.

"I know you won't, I trust you remember." She leant on to her tip toes and kissed him on the cheek. "We better get going."

"Yeah."

I know this is a bit of a weird place to end it but I kind of wrote this chapter and it ended up being over 20 pages

so I decided to cut in half. The second part should hopefully be up tomorrow or

Wednesday at the lastest.

Again thanks for all the review and adds

xxxx