Um, I guess that this is kind of a double post, 'cos I uploaded the chapter about an hour after the previous one, so please read chapter 6 before you read this update! :D Sorry if Ed seemed really OC in the last chapter. It's kinda hard to put his usual character in there, 'cos he's so depressed at the moment. Poor Ed. I'm so mean to him. XD I hope it's not becoming boring! I'll try to progress the story a bit, but ideas have been coming reaaaaaaally slowly to me. Wah, I guess you could say I have mild Writers Block… Hmm, also, I might put the rating up, just to be on the safe side. It might get quite dark later on… Anyways, enjoy folks; I'll do my best! OSSU! ^_^
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At the first crash, Winry's eyes snapped open. She lay frozen for a few seconds before cautiously sliding out of bed. It sounded like the noise had come from the kitchen. Suddenly, there was another crash, this one louder and more clattering than the last. Yep, definitely the kitchen. She had become a much lighter sleeper since Ed had disappeared. Perhaps it was because she had always been waiting for him to come back to her, listening even in her sleep for his return. Winry pushed open her bedroom door and poked her head into the hallway. There were no sounds coming from the kitchen anymore. She frowned. Maybe Al had gotten up for a midnight snack and knocked something over? Al was getting more like his brother when it came to food. Smiling fondly, Winry made her way to the kitchen. As she pushed open the door, however, the smile slipped from her face. A familiar bandage-clad back was facing her. He was standing rigidly, facing towards the window, as if he'd frozen in place. His one good arm was gripping the side fiercely, and his head was hanging low.
"E- Ed?" Winry questioned, numbly. He span round, his face contorted with pain. Winry automatically took a step back. He blinked, and his face softened, though the pain remained quietly reflected in his eyes.
"Sorry Win, did I wake you up?" His eyes lowered to the floor, answering his own question as they fell on the smashed glass. Scattered around the shards of glass were an assortment of automail parts that had previously been sitting on the counter beside the sink. It looked like Ed had swept them onto the floor, most likely in anger. Winry cleared her throat.
"Um, I heard a crash and…" She trailed off. Ed looked apologetic.
"Yeah, sorry. I dropped my glass. I was just getting some water." He murmured, shifting his weight to his automail leg. Tactfully, Winry said nothing about the automail parts scattered at their feet. Instead she frowned disapprovingly at him.
"Ed," she began reproachfully. "you shouldn't be out of bed. I'm sure Granny left you some water on the bedside table. Didn't Al tell you not to get out of bed?" He grinned sheepishly at her, catching her of guard. Winry blushed. Lucky it's dark…She thought, cringing internally.
"Uh, yeah, he told me. I just wanted to stretch my legs a bit. Well, my leg, technically." A smile was still playing faintly around his lips. Winry was glad. At least he was smiling again, even if it was only a ghost of his old smile. He bent down to gather up the broken glass, but stopped halfway, wincing. His hand flew automatically to his stomach, as a tiny hiss of pain escaped his lips. Winry dropped to his side.
"Ed? Ed, what's wrong?" she asked, her question laced with worry. He grimaced, but didn't make another sound as he gathered up the glass and piled it on the side. When he was finished, he leant back against the table, a light sheen of sweat on his face. It had only been a tiny task. Certainly not enough to make someone tired. He was definitely in pain.
"Ed, you're in pain. What's wrong? Is it your wound?" Winry asked again, worriedly. Ed waved a hand at her.
"Don't worry, it's nothing. Just a little twinge." Winry scowled at him.
"Edward Elric, if you think you can still lie to me after all these years, without me figuring it out, then you are very mistaken." She huffed. To her surprise, Ed chuckled.
"No, I guess you're right. You know, you sound uncannily like Granny when you do that." He smiled tiredly. Winry softened a little.
"Ed, let me look at it. You probably need your bandages changing anyway." He shook his head.
"Really, Winry, it's nothing. It's just sore. If you're really determined, you can look at it in the morning. We should probably go back to bed, I bet you're just as tired as I am." Ed insisted. Winry frowned at him again. She'd noticed there was something off with Ed throughout the whole conversation. He just wasn't acting like 'Edward'.
"Fine," she sighed. "but I'm taking a look at it first thing in the morning." Ed smiled.
"Yes nurse." He smirked slightly. Winry blushed brilliantly, silently praising the darkness.
"Oh, shut up." She smiled poking him towards the hallway. She was impressed with how normal she kept her voice sounding. They stopped out side Ed's room. He shuffled awkwardly.
"Listen, Win. I'm sorry, you know, for always making you worry." He said seriously. Winry smiled and rolled her eyes.
"Come on Ed, you know I'd be worrying about you even if I didn't have a reason. You and Al used to get yourselves into trouble every other day." Ed sighed.
"Yeah, but it doesn't make me feel any better." He said unhappily. "I'll try and keep out of trouble for you." Winry frowned. This wasn't like Ed at all. He rarely apologised for things. In fact she'd probably heard him apologise more times in the past day than she had her whole life. Also, Ed never usually liked to voice his feelings to her so readily. She reached up and put a hand on his forehead.
"Are you feeling okay, Ed. You do feel a little warm… What's brought all this on?" she asked warily. His cheeks flushed slightly.
"Nothing," he said hastily. "I'm just…" he shook his head. "It's nothing. Thanks, Winry, for always looking out for me." He gave her a small smile and disappeared into his room, leaving her standing bewildered by the doorway.
"What was all that about?" she muttered to herself. Winry shook her head before making her way back to her room.
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As soon as Ed was behind his door, he let out another hiss of pain. The gash on his stomach was really starting to sear. He knew he was being stupid, not telling Winry how much pain he was in, but he just couldn't face making her worry about him again. It had been hard enough trying to act as normal as possible when his realization was crushing down on him. Throughout the whole conversation, his mind had been screaming at him. Trying to force him to think about what he had just understood. Once he had recognised what the feeling was, it had become crippling. The guilt and fear had begun to tear at him in every direction, trying to bring him to his knees. If Winry hadn't walked in when she had, he couldn't guarantee what he might have done. Even worse than the crushing feeling was the fact that he still couldn't remember its cause. His memories were still just as elusive and slippery as before. His guilt was unfounded. Feeling slightly light-headed, Ed looked down at his stomach.
"Oh great," he groaned. More blood had seeped through the bandages, leaving a dark, tennis ball sized stain on the surface. If the wound had been healing up before, it definitely wasn't now. There was undeniably a problem here. Sighing, Ed limped over to the bedside table to grab the roll of bandages sitting on it. He was surprised that he had managed to conceal the fact that his leg was in less than good health. Winry normally noticed all things when it came to her automail. Oh well. At least she wouldn't have to worry about that too.
Carefully, Ed began to wrap a few more rolls of bandaging over the surface of the old ones. Hopefully, the wound would stop bleeding in the night, and this would just cover it up. Once he had finished, he painfully climbed back into bed. He didn't bother throwing the covers over himself. He was too hot anyway. Without anything to distract him, the guilt and fear returned, battling in his mind and wrapping themselves around his heart. He almost wanted to curl up into a ball and just give up. But he refused to let himself be anymore broken than he already was. He could not leave Al behind again. If he retreated into is mind, if he let the darkness swallow him, then Al would suffer even more than he would. Winry too. Winry needed him to stay strong. To continue to be the same old Ed. He would try harder.
He closed his eyes, willing sleep to come so he could escape, just for a little while. The wound on his stomach continued to sear, and the empty automail port on his shoulder ached. It had been aching since he had first awoken, but as his body had gotten tired, the dull ache had grown more intense. Sleep still would not come.
Despite the pain he was feeling, both physical and mental, Ed's eyes were still dry. It seemed that he could still not cry, even after all these years. Perhaps he was merely not capable of the action anymore. Slowly the seconds ticked by. It must be getting close to dawn soon, thought the sky was still dark. Gradually, sleep crept towards him. He no longer cared if he had nightmares. He wouldn't remember them anyway.
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Ahhrg! I'm sorry! Ed is so OC in this chapter! I didn't mean for him to be, but it just kinda happened. ^^; In fact so is Winry. T_T I'm sorry! I hope this chapter was okay, I don't really like it much, but I'll try to make the next one better! Thanks for reading, and please don't forget to review! Cookies for all that do, and a double helping of angst in the next chapter! XD
Ciaossu! ^^