Weeks passed, and Rachel and Kurt had done so many mash ups that Mr Shuester couldn't have loved them more. Meanwhile the situation between Finn and her was fairly awkward; they didn't talk to each other, but they hadn't officially broken up (yet, would add Kurt), and things were stuck in oddness. Rachel didn't even seem to be depressed anymore, which was good for her but also for Kurt, 'cause it meant she was over Finn, possibly. One morning, Kurt woke up and got prepared to go to school, and when he went downstairs to have breakfast, he noticed that Finn wasn't there. It was impossible he had already gone to school.

"Where's Finn?" he asked Carol as she poured him some coffee.

"He doesn't feel well" she answered, looking apprehensive. "He's staying here today."

"I see.. I'm sorry. Should I go say hi to him before I leave?"

"Kurt, you're so sweet" said Carol with a smile. "Don't bother, honey, I'll tell him when he wakes up. Thanks"

"Ok, I'm leaving then" replied Kurt. "Bye, Carol, bye dad.."

"Bye, Kurt!" they replied at the same time. "Have a nice day" added Carol, as he left the house.

Once he got to school, he wondered whether or not Rachel should have known about that. Much to his surprise, she didn't show up that morning. He thought that was weird, but then he hypothesized that maybe she had a test and was in her class already. No problem, he would have met her in the canteen. When Kurt didn't see Rachel at lunch, he began to worry. He decided to text her: "Hey, princess, where are you?"

After a few minutes, she replied: "Hi, Kurt, I'm not hungry, I'm in class right now.."

He tried to remember her timetable.. Thursday, 5th hour.. English class. He didn't text her back, but he ran over to her English class. As he got in, he found her looking out of the window, absorbed in her thoughts.

"Princess" called Kurt. She jumped with surprise.

"What are you doing here?" she asked with flat voice.

"I'm here for you. What are you doing here?"

"Nothing" Rachel shrugged. "I don't feel very well today.."

"I see" Kurt hesitated. It was too weird.. "You know, Finn's feeling bad as well." It was the wrongest thing he could have said. Her eyes filled with tears, as Rachel collapsed on the ground.

"What..!" Kurt quickly walked towards her. "Hey, hey, what happened?"

"I-I'm such a-an idiot.." sobbed Rachel, covering her eyes with her hands. "I c-completely screwed u-up"

Kurt put his arms around her. "What do you mean?" he asked, rubbing her back.

"I-I talked to F-Finn yesterday.." she replied, her tears wetting Kurt's jumper. "And I t-told him.. about.."

Kurt didn't want to get her in hurry, so he didn't say anything, and waited for her to speak again.

"I t-told him that I-I wanted to m-make him feel a-as bad as I f-felt" continued Rachel, sobbing harder. "And t-then I told him I-I kissed Puck, yesterday"

Kurt felt all the warmth in his body leave him. His arms, still surrounding Rachel, suddenly seemed heavier.

"Did.. did you really kiss Puck?" asked Kurt, swallowing. "Or you just lied to hurt Finn?"

He hoped she'd have replied no. He hoped she was so mean that she had made up a stupid lie to hurt Finn. But she didn't reply. She kept crying into his chest, and Kurt had to take it as no. He was caressing her with no sweetness at all, now. Like a mechanical movement, his hand rubbed her back, her hair, her shoulders.

When the bell rang, the two of them were still on the ground, the pain that kept them together worked as glue. Rachel had stopped crying, Kurt was like paralyzed. It was hard to define which one was more hurt.

Later on that day, the guys met up again in Glee Club. Rachel sat quietly on her chair, the further she could from Puck and Lauren. He was acting normally, it wasn't such a big deal for him cheating on his girlfriend. Even Kurt avoided sitting next to Rachel right now. He felt somehow betrayed as well; he and Rachel had been very friendly, lately, more than friendly.. if she'd had to cheat on her boyfriend, it should have been with Kurt, not dumb-crested-head-Puckerman. After realizing what he had just thought, Kurt massaged his temple, shaking his head. He was gay. Gay. He shouldn't have fantasized about making out with Rachel.

Mr Shuester had started talking something like 5 minutes before, and now he was looking at Kurt.

"So?" asked Will. "Did you guys prepare something for today?"

Kurt shook his head. The last thing he wanted to do was sing with Rachel, who had stood up and replied: "Yes, I have something, Mr Shue. It's another mash up.. I felt down and I wrote it yesterday"

"Very well, Rachel" said Mr Shuester, nodding. "I'm sorry you felt bad, but I'm glad you wrote something"

She smiled, joyless, and then gave Brian some sheet music. She stared at Kurt the whole time she sang:

"Comparisons are easily done
once you've had a taste of perfection.

You're like an Indian Summer in the middle of winter,
like a hard candy with a surprise center.
How do I get better once I've had the best?

You said move on, where do I go?
I guess second best is all I will know..
'cause he knows I'm unfaithful,
and it kills him inside
to know that I am happy with some other guy.
I can see him dying,
I don't wanna do this anymore,
I don't wanna be the reason why
every time I walk out the door,
I see him die a little more inside.."

Kurt couldn't believe his ears. She was talking about cheating! And apparently she was singing to him..

"He kissed my lips, I taste your mouth,
he pulled me in, I was disgusted with myself.." continued Rachel, peeking Puck, then looked back at Kurt.

"Because when I'm with him I am thinking of you,

what would you do if

you were the one who was

spending the night?
I wish that I was looking into your blue eyes.."

Wait, what? None of the two songs spoke about blue eyes. Kurt's heart began to beat harder.

"I don't wanna hurt him anymore,
I don't wanna take away his life,
I don't wanna be a murderer..
Our love, his trust..
I might as well take a gun
and put it to his head,

get it over with..
I don't wanna do this anymore.

So won't you walk through and
bust in the door and take me away?
No more mistakes,
'cause in your eyes I'd like to stay." When Rachel finished singing, tears were rolling down her face. Kurt was dazed. He had also checked out the color of Puck's eyes more than once. They were definitely not blue.

"Good job, Rachel" said Mr Shuester, sweetly rubbing her arm. She looked really upset. "Take a sit, please."

Rachel sat back down, now avoiding Kurt's gaze. His rage was completely gone. He couldn't help but thinking that her song was dedicated to him. It was a lame thought, totally crazy and irrational.. but it was there. Into Kurt's head there was a storm going on:

"She said blue eyes" he thought. "Yes, but she kissed Puck, so it means that she doesn't like you.

Puck doesn't have blue eyes.

Puck isn't gay, and she knows it.

I'm not gay.

Yes, you are.

Ok, fine, I am. But I like her.

No, you don't. You just think you do because you two have a lot in common.

Isn't that a good thing for couples?

You two are not a couple.

We could make one.

No, you couldn't. That's crazy, forget it.

But she sang blue eyes!
It could be everyone". Kurt turned around and looked at his friends. Sam's eyes were more like.. light green.

Brittany had blue eyes, but Kurt bet Rachel hadn't even notice that.. Artie. He had blue eyes too. Dammit.

"Don't be silly" Kurt told himself. "Why would she like Artie?

Well, why should she like you?

Because we spend a lot of time together. Plus, Artie has a girlfriend.

So what? She used to a boyfriend, and likes someone else.

Someone being me.

Someone being someone.

I'm someone.

No, you're no one.

No, I'm someone.

No, you're no one, you're gay.

Hey! That's really offensive!

I'm you, idiot" Kurt realized that if he hadn't talked to Rachel soon, he would have gone completely crazy.

That's why he waited for the lesson to end and then offered to give her a ride home.

"You're so nice to me, Kurt" whispered Rachel with a tiny smile. "I don't deserve people like you"

"Don't say that" replied Kurt shaking his hand. "You simply made a mistake, people do that all the time"

"It wasn't unintentional. I wanted to hurt Finn, I was mean, and selfish, and conceited.."

"You were impulsive" said Kurt, sighing. "If you had thought twice, you wouldn't have done it."

"But I haven't thought twice" Rachel's voice cracked. "I wanted my revenge. I was so mean.."

"Stop saying that" irrupted Kurt, tactless. "You weren't mean, or conceited, you just didn't love him enough"

Rachel looked at him with widened eyes.

"Yes" continued Kurt, "if you had truly loved him, you wouldn't have given a damn about that stupid lie. And if he had really loved you, he would have forgiven your mistake. But he didn't. So get over it."

"There's no need to be that rude" murmured Rachel, wrinkling her nose.

"I thought you said I was sweet"

"That too"

"Fine" said Kurt, shrugging. "Come on, get into my car. It's cold out here."

Rachel huffed, and then obeyed. As he started driving, she began to hum her mash up of Unfaithful and Thinking of you, reminding Kurt that he still had to ask her something.

"I really liked that mash up of yours" he commented. "It's nice. Sad, though"

"Thanks" replied Rachel, looking out of the window. "As you know, I wasn't in a good mood"

"I did notice, yeah. Can I ask you something?"

"Uhm, I guess, yeah.." Rachel hesitated. He had understood she had sung it for him. Her heart raced.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought I heard you sing 'I wish I was looking into your blue eyes', today"

"Yes, you're right"

"Ok" Kurt tried his best not to simper. "You see, Rach, I don't remember Rihanna singing about blue eyes.."

"You're right, she doesn't" affirmed Rachel, getting more and more uncomfortable.

"And Katy Perry doesn't either, does she?"

"Nope."

Kurt wrinkled his nose, holding back a grin. She'd added the blue eyes detail, she'd just admitted it herself!

"It's interesting" he said, "that you wanted to specify the color of the guy's eyes.."

"Well, after our mash up of Brown eyes and Blue eyes, I thought it'd have sounded cute" Rachel shrugged.

"Indeed. But Puck doesn't have blue eyes"

"Whatever do you mean?" asked Rachel, angrily. "Puck has nothing to do with my song!"

"Really? Isn't it about you cheating on Finn?" Kurt's words were a little too sharp. Who was conceited, now?

"Well, yes" answered Rachel. "But I hate Puck."

"Wow, I wonder what you'd have done if you actually liked him.."

"Kurt!" Rachel was indignant. "This is really none of your business!"

"Well, it was when you came crying on my shoulder!"

"I didn't go anywhere, you came to me!"

"Fine!" he yelled, furious. "You know what? Next time I'll mind my own business! No, even better, I'll call Puck and tell him to go cheer you up, so you'll both 'hate' each other a little more!"

"Shut up!" Rachel was enraged. "I don't care about Puck, I don't care about anyone but Finn!"

"Yeah, keep saying that to yourself"

Rachel was speechless. "What.. what.. what's that supposed to mean?"

"You're not in love with Finn" said Kurt. "Look, I don't know if you sang about Puck, or Artie.."

"Artie?" asked Rachel, sincerely confused.

"..or Sam, or whatever." continued Kurt, ignoring her. "All I know is that 'when you are with Finn, you're thinking of me', so stop repeating you love him like a broken record, it's stupid.."

"Excuse me?" Rachel's expression was both amused and scared. "What did you say?"

"You heard me. You sang 'when I'm with him I'm thinking of you'.. I'm not dumb Rachel, it was pretty obvious that you meant to say that when you are with Finn, you think of Puck, or whoever 'him' stands for"

"No.." murmured Rachel. "You didn't say that. You said 'me', you clearly said 'you're thinking of me'..!"

Kurt blushed. "No, I didn't" he replied.

"Yes you did!" insisted Rachel, grinning.

"Whatever!" yelled Kurt, glad to see they were close to her place. "I meant 'him', ok? I was mistaken"

Rachel crossed her arms, huffing.

"You act like a baby" said Kurt, trying to change the subject.

"Isn't that the reason why you love, love me?" hummed Rachel, jokingly. "Love, love me.."

Kurt laughed, as he stopped the car in front of Rachel's house. "Here we are, princess"

"Thanks for the ride.. again. I'll buy you a oil tank for Christmas"

"How about some fodder for the white horses of this beautiful carriage, milady?" joked Kurt.

"That will do" she replied, smiling. "Bye, Kurt."

"See you tomorrow, princess"