Naughty or Nice, Part 6, Conclusion
Rating: T
Spoilers: Series 5
Part 6
Eggnog and punch flowed freely. Vale, dressed as Don Juan, took great care in making the punch tipsy. Becker, dressed in his black uniform, danced with a nice, candy cane elf.
"Action Man? Where's your costume?"
"I'm a soldier."
"You're boring, and black. Where's your holiday cheer?" asked Connor.
"She's right here," said Becker, twirling Jess their way. She giggled as she twirled, but didn't seem to notice who the newcomers were, and twirled back to Becker.
"That's sweet," said Abby. "So, are you naughty or nice?"
Becker smirked. "I'm not telling."
Abby laughed. Abby was dressed in a tight red dress with jagged edges that hung down her legs in varying lengths. Her hair was shocking. She wore a long, wavy, fiery red wig.
"Wow, Abigail. You look stunning and... warm."
Abby laughed. "Thank you for changing it up a bit. Everyone greets me with "you're hot."
Becker laughed. "Proper greeting for a fire goddess."
"I guess. Connor owes me. I only agreed to this costume so he could be a frost giant. I thought the idea of opposites, fire and ice, was pretty cool. Oh, sorry, about the pun."
"A frost giant! So that's what you are," said Jess, giggling a little too much. "I thought you were just a big blue smurf."
"Jess!" cried Connor as everyone in hearing distance laughed. "Do smurfs wear dead animals, carry clubs, and look mean?"
"You're lucky that I know they're fake furs," said Abby. "That wolf skin looks so real its making me sick.
Connor had blue makeup on his face, neck and arms. He wore a fake leather raggedy armor on his chest and down his torso, kind of like Roman armor, but much more primitive. The wolf skin, complete with head, sat on his head and draped down his neck.
"I should have made you take that off," said Abby. "It's setting a bad example."
"It's a party, Abby, not a school lecture. And besides, how much naughtier can you get than wearing a poor, cute wolf. I'd like to see a Smurf do that, Jess."
Jess stared. "Uh, I forgot. What are we talking about?" she asked, then her eyes, slightly red and watery, focused on Abby.
Abs!" she cried, hopping into her arms. "You're here! Boy are you red! You weren't always a redhead were you? Oh, I'm so glad you're here! You can rock around the Christmas tree with me. Becky won't. Oh! Connor's blue. Has he always been blue?"
Then she hiccuped.
"How much has she had to drink?" asked Connor.
"Obviously, a little too much," said Becker. "I better check with Vale again. I think he's disobeying orders and over-spiking. Will you watch her?"
Connor and Abby nodded as Becker gestured to the spirit-laden elf jingling away to imaginary music.
"We'll keep her safe," said Abby.
Becker nodded and left for the punchbowl.
"Wait! Becky! Come back!"
"He's not leaving Jess," said Abby. "He's just checking the punch."
"Oh, good. It's very yummy, but could use a kick," she said.
Connor laughed. "I think its got plenty Jess. Abs, want to dance?"
"Yes, yes let's all dance," said the elf.
Connor and Abby stayed close to Jess. Jess was giddy, spinning around with very little coordination.
"Jess," said Abby, "let's sit down, maybe have a coffee."
"A coffee?" asked Jess. She looked confused.
"Yeah," said Connor. "A nice frothy coffee, your favorite."
"OK," said Jess. Abby maneuvered her to a table, and Connor got the coffees. They sat there for a while, and Jess seemed to calm down.
Becker and Vale, fired from punch duty, walked up to the little group.
"Quite a shindig, huh?" asked Lt. Vale "I'm loving it, so many naughty ladies. Are you naughty?" he asked Abby.
"A little of both I guess. Fire is necessary but deadly, and I bring the fire," she said dramatically.
"Is anyone nice?" asked the frost giant.
"I'm nice," said Jess with a hiccup. "Excuse me. See, nice. Beckey's nice. Hi."
Connor smirked. "Hi, Becky."
Becker scowled. "How are you feeling, Jess?"
Jess smiled with delight. 'I'm fine, Becky. You're so sweet. You're so cute, too. I love you, Becky.'
'I think maybe you should lie down,' he said.
'Becky! Naughty! In front of everyone too!"
Becker blushed.
"Yeah, she's toasted," said, Matt, wearing a smart red soldier's jacket and black pants.
"No fair!" cried Jess. "Becky, he's a soldier too! He stole your costume!"
"Is she alright?" asked Matt.
"Little too much punch," said Becker, glaring at Vale.
"Uh, excuse me. I think I'll hang out with some naughty nurses," said Vale, disappearing.
"There are naughty nurses here?" asked Conner, earning him a kick from Abby.
"Matt is a toy soldier," said Emily.
Becker smirked. "Yes, he is."
"Shut it Scrooge, at least I dressed up."
"Emily looks like a ballerina," said Jess, yawning.
"Yes, that is my costume. I am a toy ballerina. I am wearing a long skirt, the shop lady said, but it does not seem so to me."
Abby laughed. "It is, for a dancer's skirt, that's long."
Emily's light pink skirt went almost mid-calf on one side, but only hit her knee on the other. For a Victorian lady, it was scandalous. The top was much more modest, long sleeves and a scoop neck, matching the pink in the skirt.
"I'm sleepy," said Jess. "Take me to bed Becky?"
There were coughs, stares, gasps, and winks. Becker blushed redder than ever. "I'll take you to lie down, alone. That's what she meant."
"Boo!" cried the tipsy elf. "I did not! Let's snuggle up together, like last night."
Becker turned even redder and winced. He felt every eye upon him.
"Last night?" asked Abby.
"Action man!"
Becker walked over to Jess, ignored everyone else, and picked her up. She threw her arms around him, and snuggled into the soldier.
"Ah, Becky," she whispered.
He walked away from the table, face firmly staring ahead of him. He heard scoffs and giggles from behind him.
"Just rest, you two," called Matt. "She can't handle anything else! Not right now, that is." Then he giggled heartily.
"It's a good thing you're so darn cute," said Becker.
"I know. I am," she said, sleepily.
"Jess, you can't hold your liquor," he said, carrying her to a temporary quarters.
She didn't reply. She was asleep. He gently laid her on the bed, took of her elf shoes, and covered her up.
He sat on the bed and sighed. He thought about going back to the party, but one look back at the angelic Jess, and he smiled. He kicked off his shoes, and crawled in next to her.
Jess, who had seemed dead to the world, rolled into his arms. "Becky," she whispered.
Becker laughed, and kissed her head.
Back at the party, Jess' party planning was not wasted. Cupcakes, candy canes, and mince pies were scarfed down, and the Christmas spirit was flowing, in hearts and glasses.
A frost giant danced with a ballerina, as a fire goddess danced with a toy soldier. Don Juan was entertaining both the naughty and nice.
Suddenly, a burst of wind blasted through the canteen entrance and a shower of snow followed. Then Father Christmas, complete with his long green coat, furry hood, and red bag of gifts burst in.
"Happy Christmas!" he bellowed.
"Happy Christmas," the canteen called back.
Father Christmas made his rounds, handing out gifts and accepting kisses from the ladies, and shots of libations from everyone.
"Easy!" called Connor. "You're driving!"
"Ah, Connor Temple, created your own anomaly and almost destroyed the world, naughty," said Father Christmas, and he handed Connor a lump of actual coal.
"What!" cried Connor. "Yeah, I did do that but that's not all..."
"No," said Father Christmas. "You also saved the world, nice," he said, and also handed Connor a gift.
"Try to be more careful next year, eh?"
"Abigail Maitland," said Fr. Christmas.
"Yes, Lester, er, Fr. Christmas?"
"Kept that idiot alive in the Cretaceous, and helped save the world, nice," he said with a twinkle of his eyes, and handed her a gift. "By the way, congratulations," he said nodding at Connor.
Abby and Connor exchanged glances. "How did he know, did you tell him?" they asked each other in unison.
"Matt Anderson and Emily Merchant, traveling through time, messing with things, naughty."
They each held a coal piece.
"And you both saved the world, sacrificing your old lives for others, nice," he said with a grin, presenting each of them a gift.
"James Lester!" called Fr. Christmas.
Everyone laughed. "Where could he be?" asked Abby, laughing.
"Here, I am," said Lester.
Everyone gasped. They all had believed Fr. Christmas was actually Lester. Now, he couldn't be.
"James Lester, holding the ARC together, protecting your minions and sticking it to megomaniacal despots, nice."
"Do you have a twin brother?" asked Abby.
Lester shook his head, and his present. "He is a rather handsome man, isn't he."
"He looks just like you, maybe a little heavier, and more jolly," said Connor.
"As I said, handsome," said Lester.
"Happy Christmas!" cried Father Christmas, turning to wave to everyone, and then out he went, back through the canteen, followed again by wind and snow.
"What was that?" asked Abby.
"Whatever do you mean?" asked Lester, "it was Father Christmas."
The rest of the canteen was in shock, especially when they found out that gifts and coal had been distributed across the ARC, all by Father Christmas, and in a very short amount of time.
"Why are you all so confounded?" asked Lester. "He can travel very fast, you know."
The canteen slowly came out of shock, and music began playing, and dancing and eating continued.
Abby took time out from the party, and went to check on Jess. She found her asleep in Becker's arms, also sound asleep. On the bed, beside each of them was a gift, and a card.
Abby snuck up to read each one. Jess' said, "Jessica Parker, keeping the team safe and informed and a certain captain less bullish, nice. However, for the short skirts and painful high heels, naughty."
Becker's said, "Captain Becker, protecting the ARC and his teammates with an unwavering loyalty and devotion, nice. However, for being gruff and mean at times, naughty. Also, a double naughty for staring at short skirts, you know whose."
Abby stifled a laugh, and noticed for the first time, three lumps of coal, one for Jess, and two beside Becker. She tiptoed out of the room, and rejoined the party.
"So, are they being naughty?" asked Matt.
"No, they're asleep."
"Nice," said Emily.
"Nice party, eh?" said Lester. "I commend Miss Parker."
"Who was that earlier?" asked Abby.
"Who was who?" asked Lester.
"The big green man giving out coal and presents," asked Connor.
"It is interesting how much he resembled you, Lester," said Emily.
Lester shrugged.
"So who was he?" asked Matt.
Lester was surprised. He said, "Are you all dense? It was Father Christmas, of course! No more punch for you lot, you've had too much. Well, back to the festivities." And he left to mingle.
"It couldn't be," said Connor. Abby shrugged.
"I believe stranger things have happened," said Emily. "Matt and I are proof."
Abby nodded. "True. It's hard to believe, though, that we had an actual visit from..."
"Santa Claus," said Connor, grinning.
"He wore the attire of the man depicted in my time," said Emily, "not the red suit of Santa Claus."
"Yeah, I noticed that," said Connor.
Matt grinned. "Maybe he came through an anomaly."
"Maybe he did," said Abby, smiling.
Matt took a swig of punch, and said, "At any rate, Happy Christmas."
"Happy Christmas everyone!" they all shouted.
The End of Naughty or Nice