Hey, it's been a while! Sorry about that, any way. I read your comments and there was the consensus you wanted more, so here you go. MORE. It's like I'm you're little bitch; always doing as you ask. BUT tbh I'd fire me as it has taken me a good half a year ... forgive me? Xx
This is dedicated to any one who bothers to read this, yes YOU! You are the lucky winner of this fantastical award- treasure this moment as if it was your last.
Some months later
BLAKE
I woke up the way you always do during summer in New York. Sweating and panting. No not in that way; I mean it was hot outside, like 37 degree hot outside. My eyes flicked to the bedside clock. 09:14. A solid 8 hours of sleep. I let my head fall into my pillow with a definite thump. I felt an uncomfortable heat about my body. I waited a few moments trying to contain my annoyance under the swelling, snoring air. Legs thrashing I pushed the blankets of me, revealing my skin. Letting out a sigh I turned my head to Gerard to see if my fit had woken him.
Snore.
No, still dead as a door mouse. A few more moments I lay looking at the cream ceiling; waiting for an excuse to get up.
*Brrriinngg*
The phone's chirp stirred through the melismatic melody of summer and sweat.
"Urhhhh, get the- Bllaakkke- urrrhh." Gerard murmured.
"Awake enough to hear the bloody phone." I muttered through the teeth. Swinging my legs from the bed I found the floor. My bones groaned and grinded like the tinman as I stretched and strolled to the phone.
*Brrriinngg*
"Alright, Alright- I'm coming." I snapped at the plastic intruder. I grabbed it, curling my fingers around the flex and interrogated:
"Hello?"
There was no answer, just a deep breath in.
"Hello?" I repeat, place my hand on my hip in subconscious exasperation with the mystery caller.
No answer.
"Helloooo?" I pronounce very carefully down the phone.
"It's you; it really is." A male voice stutters
"What?"
"I've been searching. I saw your picture in a magazine, something to do with you being engaged to some musician. They said you lived in New York so I checked the yellow pages and..."
"Who is this?" I gasp down the phone. My eyes scrutinising the little holes as if I'd see his face looming in them.
"It must be you, it sounds like you darling. Oh I'm so sorry; I need to apologise. I've wanted to since I left."
It clicks through my head, cogs turn as I replay the voice. Over and over and over until...
"...Dad?"
"Yes?"
"Dad. Is this you?"
"Yes." I put a hand over my mouth, my eyes building. I pick up the phone and move to seat. My eyes check the doorway to ensure privacy.
"Why are you calling me?"
"I needed to apologise." His voice is honest and solemn.
"No you didn't..." I started
"I did."
"No, it was mams fault, not yours."
A silence follows.
"I should have been in contact sooner"
"Yeah, I would have loved a birthday card. But I'm a nomad- It makes it hard."
"I shouldn't have left."
"You shouldn't have, it really hurt me. But I understand why you did."
Another silence, but I'm determined not to let it last. There have been so many questions- so many that I didn't think would ever be answered.
"Where are you? What have you been doing?"
"I'm in London. I have a job and a house and things are good."
"Good...I really missed you dad. " I suddenly felt tears pouring down my face, my voice quaking`. I wiped them away shakily.
"I missed you too, that's why I have been looking for you. I tried calling but the house phone was disconnected and you moms mobile was too. I has no idea where you were." His voice swelled into a passionate mass.
"She sold the house you see." I attempt to say.
"I figured. The thieving bitch, I should have signed some blumming pre-nuptials." We both laugh uncomfortably through our tears. As the laughs die out we both breath in.
"I want to come back to America and see you. I want to see my daughter again."
"I want to see me dad."
I am my mother's only one
It's enough
I wear my garment so it shows
Now you know
Only love is all maroon
Gluey feathers on a flume
Sky is womb and she's the moon
I am my mother on the wall
With us all
I move in water, shore to shore
Nothing's more
Only love is all maroon
Lapping lakes like leery loons
Leaving rope burns, reddish ruse
Only love is all maroon
Gluey feathers on a flume
Sky is womb and she's the moon
"I don't think you should see him." Gerard said, his hands on his hips- back arched.
"Oh don't do that." I mutter as I pick up dirty underwear and dishes and walk into the kitchen. Gerard follows me.
"Do what, Blake?" I can tell you what he was doing, even though I wasn't even facing him. He was throwing his arms around likes he always does, his cheeks red with frustration.
"The things you always do when I talk about my parents." I thrust the underwear into the washing machine, slamming the door closed. I turn to find Gerard directly behind me, I sigh and move out of his way.
"Would you care to clarify?"He snaps. I roll my eyes as I put the dishes in the sink.
"Oh you spout of these platitudes" Water rushes over the plates, I scrub at dried tomato sauce angrily. "You puff out your chest; like a monkey. You suddenly have to get hyper masculine about thi, why do you think you have to do that, huh?" I snarl as I turn quickly to him. His mouth opens slightly. He doesn't know what to say- lost for words he stares at me.
"I..I..."
"I..I... What Gerard? Why won't you tell me?" I continue to clean
"I just didn't want to see you get hurt, but fine just walk into this fucking mantrap. I'm going to practice any way." He turns and walks to the door.
"Yes, yes. Just fuck off whenever we have a problem." I yell, only my head leaves my chore as it turn to follow him. He whips around.
"No, I'm just leaving because you're impossible to talk to when it comes to your dad. You just want to believe that he's perfect and it wasn't his fault, but I have news for you Blake. HE LEFT YOU! You don't owe him anything."
"You don't understand!"
"Why not Blake what makes you so special? Hmm, what gives you the right to stand there and scream at me about how I just can't comprehend betrayal? Or dissa-fucking-pointment?"
"YOU HAVE YOUR PARENTS. YOU FUCKING CALL THEM DAILY AND YOU CAN VISIT THEM. SINCE THE AGE OF17 I HAVE HAD NOBODY. AND NOW I HAVE ONE CHANCE TO GET EVEN THE SMALLEST AMOUNT OF MY FAMILY BACK... and you say don't take it?" My voice softens, partly because I'm not angry anymore, but also because my throat is starting to hurt. I throw the dishcloth in the sink and dry my hands on a tea towel.
"No Blake, I just don't want you to be carried away with all of this; I couldn't bear to see you hurt." He says, his eyes widening as he leans against the wall. I put my hand on my brow, trying to breathe properly.
"I know... Just go to your band rehearsal thing. We'll talk about this later."
"So you'll consider not seeing him so soon?"
"No Gerard, my dad's coming to America in four days and I am going to see him. Whether you'll be there is another story."
"Fine."