"Well, here we are, Veilstone Gym. Are you sure that you know what you're doing, Slickky?"
Lana was nervously twirling a lock of her dark hair around her fingers. Her face was contorted into a frown; she obviously wasn't confident enough for Kevin's liking, but it would have to do. They had two months and two months only, so they had to get good, fast.
He nodded, narrowing his eyes. "Lana, all you need to do is use the strategy I made up and it'll be fine. Really, so long as everything you've told me about this gym was correct, there's nothing to worry about."
Lana made some sort of noise that was a cross between a whimper and a yell. "But what if the leader notices that you're doing everything like last time?"
"I told you already, if you're ever lost, just say something like 'Attack Strategy One' and we'll fix it, okay?" Kevin sighed. This was getting tiring. For some reason, Lana was getting borderline hysterical and Kevin did not want to have to deal with her.
"But then what if you faint?" she whined.
"Use a revive or something, I don't know, just stop it already!" Kevin gave her a dark look and yanked open the gym door himself. Inside were a couple of junior trainers (who weren't all that junior-looking, they were buff as hell) among an assortment of training equipment like punching bags. He supposed that the gym was also a literal gym to work out in, too.
A couple of the trainers looked up to spot the new challenger, some interested, others quickly focusing on their physical activity again. He didn't know what the exact rules for this particular gym were, but he hoped that he could bypass all the preliminary fights and just get to the leader already.
It might not have been the best option, but at this point Kevin and probably the rest of the team were sick of grinding. As he and Lana walked forward towards the stadium at the back, nobody objected, so he assumed that it was all right.
The gym leader was a young woman with pink hair in an exercise getup. It didn't really matter to Kevin who she was, though. To him, she was only an obstacle blocking the path to the Shades. She acknowledged him and Lana, gave a friendly smile, and pointed them to the other end of the arena.
"Hey there, I'm Maylene. You're probably here for a badge, right?" She flicked her short hair away from her eyes and grinned with determination. "Three on three, okay?"
"Uh…" Lana started, but Kevin beat her to it.
"You mean three one on ones or a regular switch-out switch-in fight? Or triples?" he asked. Maylene's eyes widened.
"Ah! I'm sorry! I always forget about that part! You can switch and the battle's over when all three members of a team are down. Sound good?" It looked like she felt a little awkward, and she kept looking from Kevin to Lana trying to figure out whom to address.
All right, that was good. He still didn't know how strong this gym leader was supposed to be, so if both Styler and Mist fainted it wouldn't totally cost them the match. That said, he hoped that they'd survive long enough to at least take out one of their opponents.
Lana clenched Mist's Pokéball, her nerves starting to get to her again. Despite her shaking hand, she managed to throw the Pokéball hard enough for Mist to be released in a flash of light. Okay. Now all that she had to do was remember the strategy.
Maylene called out a Meditite. Oh, good, something he was familiar with. If he recalled correctly, Meditite was both psychic and fighting type, meaning that… nothing was that special about it. As a newly evolved fighting type, Kevin would be happy if Mist could take her out, but he was sure that he could handle her if he absolutely had to.
Lana's face scrunched up in concentration, trying to remember exactly what she had to do. Mist was supposed to be the 'test' Pokémon, a scout of sorts, so that Kevin could effectively grade the gym leader's skill level without getting too hurt himself. Basically, if Mist's Aqua Jet did decent damage, they'd have no problem.
Lana ordered the attack, which quickly hit first like it was supposed to. The Meditite wasn't hurt as much as Kevin would've liked, unfortunately – she seemed to have taken it well. Crap. Mist didn't know very many powerful moves.
The Meditite used Confusion, causing Mist to cry out in pain. She cringed and held her head between her paws, trying to sooth the throbbing feeling the attack brought on. Kevin frowned. All right, then, how about Sonicboom?
Lana let out a cry of panic. "Gah, uh, Water Gun!"
Wha— no! Mist was better with physical attacks! "Sonicboom!" Kevin harshly whispered, confusing Mist. Mist turned her head back to look at the both of them and subsequently got hit by another Confusion.
Maylene raised an eyebrow. "Hey, hey, pay attention, will ya?" she teased. "Let's Meditate, okay?"
It took Kevin a second to realize that she was calling out an attack. Hastily, he called out to Mist, "Hey, now's your chance!"
Mist nodded and did a flip, resulting in what could only be Sonicboom coming from… nowhere. Kevin didn't know how it worked. The powering-up Meditite winced when the shockwave hit her face, and Maylene raised her eyebrow again.
"So, wait a minute, who's the challenger here?" she asked idly. "Drain Punch."
Lana flushed. "I am! I'm battling you!"
"Aqua Jet," said Kevin, focusing on the battle. Mist swiftly dodged the punch and got a hit square in the back, which looked like a critical. Awesome.
"Care to tell me why your Pokémon's calling all the shots, then? Drain Punch again," She looked genuinely bewildered, but that didn't distract him. Right now, Mist and Meditite's fight was important.
As Mist took the hit, Lana's eyes welled up in tears. "I…"
"Is there a problem with that?" Kevin cut in, momentarily laying his eyes on the pink-haired woman. "Try a Sonicboom at a closer range, Mist!"
Maylene shrugged. "Confusion. I guess it doesn't really matter. It's just that I've never battled a Pokémon like this before."
"But Gardenia said I'd be disqualified!" sobbed Lana. She was kind of a crybaby, now that Kevin thought about it.
"Hold on. Time out." Maylene gestured to her Meditite who quickly stopped trying to beat Mist to a pulp. Mist stood up weakly, looking like she had expended most of her energy anyway. The gym leader turned to face Lana and Kevin. "They can't disqualify you for that— Er, at least, I don't think they can."
"Huh?" Lana snivelled.
"Well, technically, the 'no outside help' rule only applies to other trainers. And since your Monferno isn't a trainer… uh…" Maylene tapped her foot. "Eh, forget what I was saying, the Shades probably fixed that loophole by now."
Kevin frowned. "Wait a minute. You mean what I'm doing is considered cheating now?"
"Uh, yeah, kind of," Maylene said.
"But Pokémon can't be qualified Pokémon Trainers," he said.
"Yeah," Maylene confirmed.
"So there's absolutely no way that a Pokémon can legally participate as a trainer in the sport anymore. Wow, I'm loving Mr. Shade more and more each day," Kevin finished in a singsong voice. Damn that guy.
Nobody spoke for a long moment. Good thing, because he had a feeling that if somebody did speak up, he'd lash out at them. Oh, this was fantastic. Cosmic, even! The Shade, under the guise of wanting some sort of 'perfect world', probably wanted to make himself look politically correct. So he changed a few rules to make humans and Pokémon more equal, but ended up making it worse. Didn't he ever want to bring good fortune?
Oh wait, this was his Uncle Mono. Of course not. He sighed. "…Is there any other loophole I can possibly exploit so that I can win the league?"
Maylene looked thoughtful. "I guess if you really wanted to, you could go to court and sue—"
"Hell no," Kevin said.
The Meditite spoke up. "Well, if you just went around being a trainer, wouldn't the league people notice and fix the rule so that you can enter?"
He stared at her. "M-maybe, but—"
"You're a Monferno. That's going to make an impact on them, whether it's politically correct or not. Isn't it?" Mist added.
Kevin blinked. He didn't know what to say.
"That's what the Shade did, after all. He just showed up out of nowhere, said some stuff about Pokémon rights, and boom! Instant change," The Meditite nodded. "People might think you're just an imitator at first, but hey, you've got a point."
Any other point in his lifetime always heralded a negative reaction from every random Pokémon he'd ever met. But now? Suddenly, Kevin held a newfound respect for the weirdo residents of Crazyland. He grinned.
"All right, then. Shall we continue with the match?" He smirked.
The blank look on Maylene's face disappeared. "Oh… Yeah! Okay!"
The remainder of the match was pretty unremarkable. Mist fainted from Meditite's Drain Punch, but Styler quickly took care of that problem. He had some trouble with Maylene's second choice, a bulky Machoke, but he managed to knock out that one too, much to Kevin's surprise. He was exhausted by then, though, so it looked like it was finally time for Kevin to shine on his own.
Maylene's last Pokémon was an impressive-looking blue canine that Kevin had probably seen in a league video once or twice. The way he frowned when he saw his opponent made Kevin guess that fire types weren't his favourite.
Okay, then. Maylene called for a Bone Rush, to which the Pokémon responded by creating a glowing blue baton-like bone between his paws. Whoa, now that was neat. But if Kevin's knowledge of attacks had anything to say, attacks with the word "bone" in them meant they were ground type.
Fine, he could deal with that. Kevin instantly shot into a Flame Wheel, aiming to get behind his opponent. Maybe he could try a better version of Fire Spin by circling the other Pokémon and creating a wall of fire along the ground, but if he got too close he might get hit with a super effective attack.
The other Pokémon quickly sidestepped to face him again. Ah, so he wasn't falling for that. That would make things a bit more interesting. Kevin went directly into a Mach Punch, a move that his foe did not predict, and ended up getting a solid hit on his opponent's jaw. Sweet.
"He's close! Force Palm!" shouted Maylene. What exactly was Force Palm? Kevin tried to duck, but the move's shockwave effect grazed his shoulder and made him feel numb. Numb…
Wait, no, damn it! Not paralysis! That was like, the worst status condition ever, aside from being asleep. He swore to Arceus, if this Pokémon was going to try parafusion, he'd be pissed.
"Awesome, Lucario! Drain Punch!" called the gym leader. Oh, never mind, this "Lucario" was just a wannabe Breloom. Now that he thought about it… His old Breloom strategy would've worked fine from the start. He hated when he forgot stuff like that.
Kevin ran low to the ground and attempted to trip Lucario with his tail. It worked somewhat; the foe lost his balance but caught himself before he faceplanted. That was all Kevin needed, though. A quick Flame Wheel to the back gave Lucario a good, clean hit and gave Kevin fantastic results. Judging by the look on Lucario's face, that was definitely super effective, and it hurt.
"Turn the tables and use his own strategy against him!" Maylene yelled. Ha, no way was he going to let that happen. This strategy was second nature to him.
Kevin jumped over the Lucario's aimed kick and smirked, rolling into another Flame Wheel in midair. Lucario managed to dodge the airborne attack, but the speed of the move quickly caught up with him. Kevin crashed into him and rendered him unconscious.
So… they'd won the match. He grinned. He felt like a little kid again, when he'd first figured out how to defeat the super-strong Breloom in Petalburg Woods all those years ago. He glanced at Maylene, who was fishing around for something in a bag.
After a few seconds of searching, she pulled out a shiny piece of metal and handed it to Kevin. "Well, here you go. It's called the Cobble Badge. You won it, fair and square." She smiled again, returned her Lucario to his Pokéball, and wished him good luck with all the other badges and the league.
Lana got up from the bench on the sidelines. She looked miserable, Kevin noticed. He suddenly realized how upset she probably was, what with her gym battle turning into his. What could he say, though? "I'm sorry?" To be frank, he didn't really care about her that much. Still, he did feel a little guilty.
They left the gym in silence, their only interaction with each other being Kevin giving Lana the badge. Oh well. It didn't matter, they were one step closer to the Shade, right?
…He really, really hated that sour taste he got when he felt guilty.