CH 4: Back to square one

Destiny might be a bitch, but her best friend Marissa is surprisingly shy. I remember bumping into her in the hallways on my first day at this school. She seemed to be in a hurry, and was very apologetic for running into me. At least some people in this school know their place.

"Hey." Destiny waves when we pass each other in the halls, and I smile and wave back.

After three days of doing everything she tells me, all I get is a 'hey'. Well, it's enough for me. At least she's not bashing on me in front of the rest of the house anymore. I'm pretty sure this is the first time she's actually regarded me in a friendly matter since the incident, actually.

I arrive in my English class afterwards. It's good to have Destiny off my case, but I still have this Mindy chick bugging me about Nina's past. I don't want to get on her bad side, but I seriously think if she wants to know that bad then she should just ask her 'best friend' herself.

'Why did you leave Anubis house anyway?' Her note read. She was changing the subject yet again, but whatever makes her happy.

'Boys' I scribble down and throw the paper on her desk.

"Enough said." The girl comments aloud, and I nod.

With that she kept the note to herself and started playing with her phone. I should really be paying attention anyway, since I was already behind on a lot of my work.

I was having some difficulty following along in Debate class, mainly because I had skipped the paper I was assigned about animal experimentation. It's not my fault! Destiny had advanced trigonometry! We were at the last couple minutes of the class, though, so I guess I survived it.

The bell rang, and I start to leave.

"Oh... oh no! No this is terrible!" Marissa moans.

Ignore her and leave like everyone else, or gain possible friend points and try to help her out? ...

"What's the matter?" I ask, approaching the troubled girl.

"Oh, hey. It's Patricia, right?"

I nod.

"Have you seen the speakers panel list for next week yet?" She questions as she points to the piece of paper hanging in front of us.

I quickly scan over it.

"Hey! You made lead presentation!" I note. "Congratulations!"

"No, not congratulations!" Marissa freaks. "I can't argue animal rights in front of the whole class!"

"Uh, yeah you can." I confide. "I saw you working on that debate paper all weekend. You even missed dinner last night because you were too busy 'adding in some last-minute research' or whatever it was you called it. ...point is I'm sure you're well prepared."

Marissa plops down at the desk next to her, and momentarily burry's her face in her hands. "No..." She looks up, desperate, and I take a seat next to her.

"Why not?"

"I might have done the research, but nothing I do could prepare me to speak in front of the entire class. I'm just too nervous! I don't know what to do! I mean, I only worked so hard because I thought someone else more confident could use my research to enhance their original ideas. You know, someone who has a general idea on the subject, AND can talk in front of people. If I go up there and try to argue animal rights, I'll probably end up doing the exact opposite!"

She was really freaking out here, and I think I actually felt bad for her. I used to have a bit of stage fright too; I know the feeling.

"I'm sure if we just talk to Hudson, we can work it all out." I say in attempt to calm her down.

All the students had left by now, and our teacher had retreated to her office.

"Misses Hudson?" I call, knocking on the side of the door.

"Yes? Come on in, girls."

We do.

"Hi, so, we wanted to talk to you about the recent listing for the speakers panel. You see-"

"Patricia, if Marissa has a problem with my selections, then don't you think she should tell me herself?"

I look to Marissa, who stood nervously behind me. I step aside, and wait for her to say something.

She appeared shaky, but spoke anyway. "Um... You see, I don't feel like I am the right choice to argue this upcoming topic... and..."

Our teacher stands, and places some papers in one of her cabinets. It's almost as if she's challenging Marissa to speak up.

"And I just can't do it!" The troubled girl cries.

Miss Hudson pauses, and smiles briefly. "Dear, I've reviewed your report and I must say, never before have I read a paper more passionate and dedicated about any topic I've assigned in this class. No student has ever had this strong an opinion, nor put this much time into one of my projects. Some, by the way, didn't put any effort." She adds, looking in my direction momentarily.

I shrug.

"The thing is, I'm sick of sitting through boring debates that students don't care about. I'm sure you'll do fine. No, I'm sure you'll give a powerful argument on why animals should be forbidden to be used in scientific experimentation!"

She simply walks away afterwards, leaving me with a terrified Marissa and a new problem to be responsible for. Just great...

No one really saw Marissa for the rest of the day. Apparently she'd locked herself in her room after she got back from school and no one knows why. The 12th grade student who shares a room with her complaining about how she couldn't get to her room, and asked Silvia to unlock it.

"Kelly, it is almost supper time. I'm sure you can wait until after I've finished cooking dinner to get whatever it is that's so important, am I right?"

"Silvia I-"

"Right?" Silvia pushes, and the curly haired female nods, not wishing to upset the house mother.

We all sat around the television as usual. I learned we only get stupid channels, like the news or educational programs, but it provides good background noise sufficeive.

"Did anyone else think this week's History test was insane?" One of the twin's comments as she sits down.

"I think I'm seriously going to fail that class!" Mindy replies.

"I didn't think it was that bad!" Nina shrugs. "Yeah, there was some material on there that mister Johnson defiantly didn't cover, but they were mostly common sense."

"Nina, 'what year did the first plane break the sound barrier' is NOT common sense!" The twin on the left explains, and we all laugh.

"No, actually, I agree with Nina. The test was pretty easy. I still think I'm going to fail, though." Mindy announces.

The food was pretty good. Silvia's cooking might not compare to Trudy's, but it was still better than the school cafeteria's sad excuse for lunch.

"How'd you do on the test Patricia?" Destiny asks, and everyone seems a little confused at the fact she's talking to me.

I was stunned at first, but figure I shouldn't act too surprised. "Oh, just fine. I was lost on the first half, but Johnson said I could re-do it because I haven't been there for the first three chapters."

No one said anything, and I was starting to become nervous. Were they still mad at me, even though me and Destiny made up?

Then Mindy spoke. "If you want, I guess I could help you study before your retake."

"And, you can borrow my notes if you want!" Kelly chimes in. "You know, if I ever get them out of my room."

Yes! Finally, they're accepting me!

"I think I have a few of the quizzes he handed back, if you want to look at those."

"Yeah, the questions on there are practically identical to the ones on the test!" The twins offer.

"Wow, thanks everyone! I'd really appreciate that!"

"Don't worry about it." Destiny smiles. "You're going to be behind, that's just the way it is! And we're here for you if you need us to fill you in."

"Yeah, on any subject, really." Nina adds. "If you're falling behind in any of the other subjects, then I'm sure any one of us would be willing to-"

Finally, things were heading in the right direction for me. Then Marissa stormed in the room.

Everyone looks in her direction. Her eyes were puffy and red, and she looked like she'd been crying.

"Marissa! What happened?" Destiny asks, showing concern for her friend.

She embraced her friend shortly, and once they'd parted, Marissa pointed an accusing finger in my direction.

"This is all your fault! Not only do I have to give a presentation in front of the ENTIRE class, but now Misses Hudson expects it to be the best argument of the semester! Do you know how much pressure that is?"

Fuck...

"I hate you Patricia!"

With that she runs back up to her room. Destiny calls after her, glares at me momentarily, then follows her.

Just great. No one would even look at me, except Nina, who was glaring at me angrily in an unforgiving way. Back to square one...

After a very awkward dinner, I make my way up to Marissa's room. It was the only door that was closed, so I assume she must be in there. And I sorta could hear her talking to Destiny.

"It's kinda your own fault." Destiny was saying, before I open the door.

"It is not! It's all hers!" She accuses, and Destiny spins around.

I step inside and shut the door. "Marissa, look..."

"Patricia, I don't think you should really be in here right now." Destiny suggests.

I wasn't going to solve anything by leaving, though. I had to do something, or I may never be accepted here.

"Marissa." I persist, against Destiny's suggestion. "I'm really really sorry about what happened at school, but I seriously didn't mean for any of that to happen!"

She wipes away her tears, and her entire body tenses. "You're the one who suggested I go talk to her. Hudson said that she expected me to give a powerful argument about animal rights. As far as I'm concerned, you're the reason I'm under so much pressure, and I'll never, ever forgive you!"

"I said I was sorry!" I argue.

Marissa crosses her arms.

"Maybe if you hadn't written such an amazing paper-"

"Destiny, who's side are you on?"

Destiny shuts up, looks in my direction with a puzzled expression, and shrugs. I can't blame her, either. She understands I never meant to get her bestie in this mess, but no one else would.

"Get out of my room. Now! I'm done with you Patricia, I don't ever wanna see you again!"

I try to protest, but she threatens to start yelling, and I realize it best I give her more time to cool off.

There has to be something I can do to fix this. Maybe I could try talking to Miss Hudson again- no, wait. That's what got me in this mess in the first place. I should have never got involved! It's too late now, though. I'm in this, and I can't just ignore it. I'll have to do something, whether Marissa wants my help or not.

But what? How can I help her if she doesn't want to see me? Perhaps I could enlist Destiny's help, or maybe Mindy. They're the only two who even acknowledge my existence at this point, plus Marissa isn't ignoring them.

"Just give her a week or two." Mindy suggests. "Marissa's been mad at people before, but she usually gets over it pretty quickly. Trust me- that girl can't hold a grudge for the life of her!"

"But I can't wait a week or two. My test retake is in two days!"

"You can just borrow my notes then." She reasons.

"You take notes?" I say skeptically.

Mindy rolls her eyes. "Borrow someone else's notes from class. I bet Cassi would lend you hers! She's top of the class, and she doesn't even live at Woodland."

At least she was trying to help. "I guess that solves the studying problem, but... I still have to live with these people! I don't want to live here if everyone-"

"Oh, Nina's coming. Sorry, but I can't be seen talking to you." Mindy notes, then shoves me off to the side, signaling me to leave.

It's insane how much people care about their reputation! I can't believe I'm one of them. Sometimes I wonder if it's all really worth it, and if I should even care what these people think. It's going to be hard living here if everyone's too afraid to talk to me, so I guess I better talk to Destiny about what she thinks I should do. It should be fairly easy, since she and I are roommates.

It wasn't until midnight that she'd actually came in, and I was having trouble staying awake. Staying up late doing her homework has really taken a toll on my sleeping habits, and I've been exhausted since.

"Oh good, you're still up!" She notes. "I wanted to talk to you about this situation with Marissa."

"Me too." I admit. "I really didn't mean to upset her."

"I know." Destiny cuts off. "She's just stressed, and she needs someone to blame. Unfortunately that someone is you. I just want you to know that you don't have to feel bad, okay?"

I sat up now, and sighed loudly. "I do feel bad, though. She looked so terrified, and I only made it worse."

Destiny shrugs.

"Des, I want to do something to-"

"Don't call me Des."

"...DESTINY." I correct. "I want to help her. I just don't know how."

She paces around, contemplating on what I said. Finally, "I don't know."

So much for that...

"But, if you really want to help her, then I'll let you know if I think of something."

"Thanks Des." I smile.

She pauses and stares at me.

"...stiny." I finish.

She nods happily and turns the lights out, and I figure I better sleep on it before making any decisions.