Title: Possibly, Maybe: Chapter Eight
Author: Blu_Eyed_Demon
Fandom: Uncanny X-men
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I don't own the X-men or any of the characters or this would have probably happened in the comics
Summary: Bobby's utterly miserable and no one but Jean Paul seems to be noticing...
Chapter Eight: In which Bobby takes significant steps forward, Jean Paul yells a lot and the women get the shock of their lives.
Chapter Eight
Friday morning found Bobby Drake heading to the mall with Jubilee. It hadn't been his first plan for the day, if he were brutally honest, but Jean Paul had some business meetings to attend to and so Bobby had decided to use the time to his advantage.
He wanted to make amends with the friends he'd been treating so badly, maybe even work his way up to telling them about Jean Paul if not his secondary mutation. He'd been an ass because he was scared but Jean Paul's words on the rooftop had hit home: he wasn't going to lock himself in another closet and have his new boyfriend end up resenting him for hiding too long.
Jubilee asking him to go shopping with her had been a lucky chance, she was one of the more forgiving X-men when she wanted to be and a good place to start making amends, though she'd been obviously surprised he'd accepted her offer. The shock on her face had made him feel lousy again but at least he was trying to make things right. In fact, he was planning on killing two birds with one stone if he could work the nerve up.
He was hoping that Jubilee was going to be his 'tester'; the first person he came out to just to prove to himself the world wouldn't end if he did. In a way she was perfect: she hadn't known him quite as long as some of the others had and they'd always had a playful friendship based on pranking and goofing off. He was almost certain that she wouldn't react too badly and it would therefore give him the much needed confidence to tell the rest of his friends and perhaps the whole mansion in time. He'd just take it at baby steps for now though, first he had to focus on working up the nerve to tell Jubilee.
"You know Frosty, I've missed this." Jubilee told him over the racks. She had pulled him into a clothes store to play one of her favourite mall games, a game that he knew as 'Dress up Bobby'. Since he wanted her in the best mood possible,and did need some new clothes, he was playing along happily.
"I have too." Bobby replied honestly as she came round and held up a shirt against him, pulled a face and returned the hanger. "I've just had a weird time lately and, you know..."
"You're back to being yourself now, that's all that matters." Jubilee smiled happily and Bobby felt as if he could hug her. He knew she was curious but she still held back for some reason. He wasn't really sure why that was, after all he knew how much she loved to gossip, but the fact that she was trying to give him space made him give into the desire and suddenly hug her tightly.
For her part, Jubilee let out a startled yelp before just hugging, giggling a little. "Bobby, what're you doing, you big Goober?"
The giggling soon quietened and she hugged him back just as tightly. She sounded scared when she spoke. "Bobby? Is there something wrong? Has something happened?"
Slowly, he released Jubilee from his arms and smiled at her, trying to reassure her.
"No, nothing's wrong Jubes. I've just missed you." And as he said it, it hit him hard exactly how much he'd missed her, missed everyone in fact. He'd been so cut off for so long, though it was not entirely his fault since everyone had been wrapped up in their crap that they'd all drifted away from one another, but he knew he needed to make more of an effort.
She gave him an extended look, concern still obvious, before slowly nodding. "I've missed you too, Popsicle." She kissed his cheek softly and then led the way to another rack of clothes.
Bobby followed her for the next few hours, after which both of them ended up collapsed on the couch in the rec. room surrounded by shopping bags as their feet ached.
"We should do that again sometime." Jubilee decided with a content smile as she kicked off her shoes.
"I might need to build my stamina up first, I forgot what hitting the mall with you was like!" Bobby groaned dramatically as he removed his jacket and stretched out on the couch, making a lazy grab for the remote. He hadn't yet found the right moment to talk to her though.
Jubilee sat up straight suddenly with a gasp "Bobby, is that a...Oh my God, you have a hickey!"
"Whaa? Oh, yeah." His fingers lightly brushed over the bruised spot on the nape of his neck. Jean Paul had gotten a little carried away the night before, the other man had been more than a little embarrassed by it this morning but Bobby kind of liked it. It was visible, physical proof that despite the spreading ice, despite all the flaws that were so often listed about him, someone found him attractive. A very sexy someone.
It had previously been covered by his jacket and he'd forgotten it was there to some extent, so Jubilee suddenly noticing it had made him jump. At least it gave him a slightly easier way into the conversation he wanted to have with her.
"What are you, like, sixteen?" She asked whilst laughing hysterically and as Bobby started to reply she cut in "No, wait I've got a better question! Who did it?"
"Well, I've been wanting to talk-"
"Oh God! It's a student isn't it?" Jubilee's expression was suddenly scandalised. "A student, how could you? Which one? Do I know her? Is she legal? You are gonna be in so much trouble, Mister! Wait until Scott finds out!"
"Breathe, Jubes. Just breathe, will ya?" Bobby replied dryly as he moved to sit up "It wasn't a student so you can chill out. Just listen, let me get a word in edgeways yeah?"
Very solemnly, Jubilee mimed zipping her lips before leaning forward eagerly for the gossip.
"Ok, so first off I haven't told anyone else yet so..." His palms were feeling sweaty as he tried to think of the words he'd been rehearsing over and over. "I'm seeing someone. Well, more than that really, I'm dating I guess. Can you call it dating when there's only been one date and neither of you knew it was a date at the time?"
"Huh." Jubilee stared at him with wide eyes, zipped mouth apparently forgotten. "And I thought my relationships were complicated."
"Wait, ok? There's more. For a long time I ignored something about me and now that I'm dating, I kind of can't ignore it and I don't want to either. I don't want to stop myself being happy just to fit the image I had in my brain of what I should be or what you guys wanted me to be. It's still freaking me out but I'm so much happier now that I've stopped ignoring it and, and why are you laughing?"
Jubilee was indeed shaking madly as she stifled her giggles though she managed to calm enough to inform him "You lost me a while back Frosty, what're you trying to say?"
"I'm trying to say," He paused and took a deep breath. "Jubes, what I'm trying to say that I'm dating a guy."
Silence. Stillness
Bobby felt his chest tighten as he stopped breathing, his heart thudding violently as he waited for the reaction. His tension released when Jubilee's face split into a grin.
"Great, next time we're at the mall we can check out the guys together!" She said happily before tilting her head thoughtfully "You said you hadn't told anyone, so I'm the first one who knows? Oh Frosty!"
He found himself quite suddenly, once again locked in a tight embrace with Jubilee. This time it was made slightly more awkward by the way they'd both been sitting on the couch but it meant even more than the first.
When she pulled back, she beamed as she rambled on "I can't believe I'm the one you chose to come out to first! That's so sweet you trust me like that. Though, you know, come to think of it I had no idea you might be gay, why didn't I see it?"
"Well, I'm not so sure about the gay part." Bobby tried to explain feeling a little awkward though he certainly appreciated how well she was taking his news. "I'm not quite sure what label I am right now but I think having a boyfriend definitely crosses me off of the 'straight' list."
"No kidding!" Jubilee giggled as she poured them both glasses of soda, handing one to Bobby. "So, you said you were seeing someone. Anyone I know?"
Bobby couldn't believe how blasé she was acting about it all but he knew he genuinely appreciated it. It made it so much easier that she wasn't treating him like he'd just turned into the Abominable Snowman or something. Then again, that wouldn't be out of the ordinary for Bobby either.
"Eh, yeah actually," He felt himself grinning as he thought about Jean Paul. It was strange, last week he would never have believed that he'd ever be in this situation at all, let alone coming out as Jean Paul's boyfriend and feeling so giddy about it. There was no other word, he was giddy and he couldn't remember the last time he felt that way over anything, let alone over a relationship.
"Seriously?" She looked nothing short of taken aback. "But I don't know...do I know any who's gay?" Her brow furrowed as she thought about it. Bobby just watched with a smile, he'd put her out of her misery eventually but first he'd let her wildly guess.
"OK, I don't really know him but the only definite is Northstar and you'd never-oh God, it's Northstar isn't it?" Jubilee practically squealed the last half of her sentence as her revelation hit.
"What makes you think that?" He tried to ask as neutrally as possible whilst sipping some of the lurid green sugary soda.
"You're grinning like a moron."
"Am not." Bobby argued, he was not going to be as dorky as that but he could feel the grin he was trying to suppress growing and knew he quickly lost the battle. His cheeks heated up a little as he beamed at his friend.
"You are, aren't you? You're dating Northstar. That's so...weird actually. I've never even seen you guys together." She tilted her head thoughtfully, her large hoop earrings glinting in the light as she did so. "He's just so...And you're just so..."
"Thanks that made a lot of sense." Bobby smirked causing Jubilee to swat his shoulder before she settled back in the sofa beside him and opened a box of double stuffed oreos.
"You know what I mean, he's just so...grown up." She pulled a face and Bobby shook his head, attempting to be indignant.
"And I'm not?"
"Sweetie, your shirt has Smurfs on it." Bobby looked down to wear Jubilee was pointing and grinned widely once more.
"Yeah, I kinda only put it on to see his face this morning." He snickered, remembering how Jean Paul had come out of the shower and rolled his eyes dramatically at the sight of Bobby and once again threatened to take him shopping. At least Jubilee had taken care of that, though he wasn't sure what his new boyfriend would make of the Jubilee influenced purchasing either.
Crashing back to the moment, he asked her seriously "So, you're really ok with this?"
"Yeah, I am. How can I be against something that makes you happy?" Jubilee reasoned gently before adding wickedly "So, if he saw you getting dressed you must be at the staying over point already right? Now, you are not leaving this couch until you tell me every single detail Mister!"
Jean Paul didn't look up as the bedroom door opened, he needed to keep his focus for only a few more moments to complete the final sternly worded e-mail.
Behind him, Bobby loudly and dramatically flopped onto his bed and groaned "I feel violated."
"If you sat next to Cain at dinner again you only have yourself to blame." He replied dryly as he signed off his name, quickly scanned the email for errors before clicking the send button.
"I told Jubilee."
Jean Paul snapped his laptop shut and spun around on his desk chair. Bobby was lying spread eagled on his bed, his t-shirt had hiked up just a touch to expose a little of his icy abs. He opened his eyes, moving his head to meet Jean Paul's gaze.
"You told her what, Otterpop?" Jean Paul lent forward in his seat. Bobby had, after all, been keeping more than one secret from his friends. He smiled as Bobby reached out lazily for his hand, letting his arm flop back down lazily onto the bed when he found Jean Paul wasn't in close enough proximity.
"About us." He explained, thankfully still smiling so Jean Paul felt reassured enough that it must have gone well, despite Robert's amateur dramatics. "Planned to anyway but she accused me of sleeping with a student so kinda had to tell her."
"And how, pray tell, did Miss Lee come to such a conclusion?" He asked with amusement as he moved himself to sit on the end of the bed. He shifted closer, within Bobby's reach, and lightly ran his fingers over the exposed stomach causing the younger man to squirm just a little.
"She saw the hickey," Bobby chuckled though that could have been from the ticklish caress "And, you know, only sixteen year olds give hickeys. Which reminds me, I owe you one." He suddenly grabbed Jean Paul's tie and tugged him closer.
"Oh no you don't!" He laughed as he covered Robert's mouth with his hand. Coming home from CEO meetings to Bobby were certainly preferable to the wallowing in stress that he used to favour.
"Robert, are you licking me? You are such a child!" He laughed, straddling the other man's hips to ensure he had the upper hand in their little struggle.
"Now," He said very seriously but with a gleeful smile in place. "Are you going to behave, mon amour?" Bobby silently nodded as his hands ran up Jean Paul's thighs, a mischievous glint ever present in his warm brown eyes.
As soon as the hand was removed, Bobby was talking and laughing again. "I'm a child? If I'm a child, that makes you a very bad man."
"Oui, I guess it does." He lent down and kissed Bobby playfully before asking "Now, why do you feel violated Cher? What did the bad Jubilee do to you?"
"She's a helluva loss to the NYPD, that girl is. I just got interrogated for hours." Bobby pouted up at him before chuckling a little "So if she's scarily knowledgeable about us it's not through sudden telepathy it was from force. And tickling."
"Aw, poor Bobby! Want me to kiss it all better?" Jean Paul asked with a wide smile, feeling a little goofy but finding he really didn't care.
He was terrified on one level, in a mere few days Robert had gotten closer than anyone had in years, but on another level he was just full of joy and relief. He couldn't remember the last time he had had this and a small cynical part of him wondered how long it was going to last but he was, for now, ignoring it. Robert seemed to always know when he thoughts were turning in that dark direction though and would inevitably do something ridiculous or endearing or just plain sexy that would banish the negativity.
As their kiss ended, he looked down and tutted at Bobby's shirt again "Why do you wear such hideous clothes, Robert?"
Bobby grinned up at him wickedly "To give you even more of a reason to rip them off me."
Jean Paul found he couldn't argue with that logic as the foul cartoon shirt flew to the floor.
Robert Drake let out a sigh and stretched out. The evening had been going so well, more than well and he'd even been on the verge of making a radical suggestion, radical for Bobby at least, and now Jean Paul was yelling. The only consolation that Bobby had was that at least he wasn't the one being yelled at.
Apparently Jean Paul had upset some of the people in his office today because this was the third screaming phone call he'd received in succession and, really, who was that angry about work at this time of night? Bobby just couldn't comprehend that, though he realised quickly his own hypocrisy because whilst he was mentally mocking the callers, he was simultaneously admiring Jean Paul's passion.
It wasn't just his passion that was interesting either since Jean Paul had gotten straight out of bed to answer the phone and was still absolutely naked. Bobby's eyes moved over the other man's chest as he gestured wildly with a string of French swear words. The muscles in his chest shifted and rippled a little as he moved and Bobby licked his lips slowly as he admired them.
Jean Paul wasn't overly muscled like some of the men in the mansion, he was lean but well-muscled and toned in a way that showed that he took care of his body. Bobby had heard he had once been a gymnast and knew he'd been an Olympian which, of course, explained the physique but was also just a little intimidating. He had to work hard just to keep up and get by, he didn't mind it but dating another guy definitely made him more aware of his own flaws in that respect. Not that Jean Paul seemed to notice, at least he didn't seem to since he was constantly complementing Bobby . Or perhaps he was over compensating?
Bobby silently shook his head; he wasn't going to do this to himself. Just because he was dating a guy now, it didn't mean he had to turn into an insecure little girl about his own body. He could and should just be comfortable enough to enjoy Jean Paul in all his glory.
With a snarl, Jean Paul hung up on his caller without saying goodbye but his expression clearly softened as his eyes fell upon Bobby. The Iceman was still lying on the bed, as naked as Jean Paul, and he thought dimly that he ought to be self-conscious under such an intense stare but instead he felt sexy.
Sexy wasn't a feeling or description that Bobby was used to applying to himself. Dorky with an occasional cute factor seemed to be the general consensus of opinion when it came to 'What is Bobby Drake?' but then last week he would have said straight as an arrow too, he would have been lying but he would have fought the issue hard if anyone had questioned it. Now though, now he was naked in another man's bed and feeling sexy because of it. Life was just never that predictable with the X-men
With a grin, he stretched out again for Jean Paul's viewing pleasure. The sheet that had lain across him, low on the hips, slipped a little lower as he did so and Jean Paul's eyes followed it.
"Come back to bed," He demanded in a voice he barely recognised as his own, he could see the affect that his behaviour and words were having on Jean Paul. Dimly, he wondered how he could have let himself get so far through life without ever having done this, felt like this before.
He grinned, sitting up and grabbing Jean Paul by the hips as he pulled the other man back down onto the bed with him as their lips crushed together in an intense kiss.
"Robert." Bobby just smiled and kiss him again, pulling the older man down onto him even more. "Bobby-"
"Less chat, more kissing," Bobby replied distractedly, hooking a leg up and around one of Jean Paul's to maintain body contact. He coiled his arms around the older man's neck as he kissed him deeply once more but Jean Paul pulled away.
"Bobby, Cher, stop." He said, commanded, and actually pinned Bobby's hands down when they didn't desist in their groping.
"Was I doing something wrong?" Bobby frowned, a little breathless and a lot confused. Jean Paul hadn't ever stopped him kissing before. He then grinned, glancing at Jean Paul's hands still pinning him. "You know, if you want to take advantage of my not being able to go anywhere, feel free."
"An offer I will very gladly take advantage of but first I must go to the office." He seemed to be reluctant about it but it still annoyed Bobby.
"Office?" He repeated, his voice calm for now."Right now? Seriously? It's, like, gone nine. Who's gonna be there?"
"Believe me, here with you is where I want to be, Cher," Jean Paul stroked Bobby's cheek tenderly and Bobby pulled away from the contact with a frown. "But if I do not go now, those calls will-" He was cut off by his phone starting to ring again. "As you see, they'll interrupt the rest of our night."
"Turn off your phone then." Bobby urged and was hopeful as Jean Paul climbed out of bed though he groaned when instead Jean Paul answered. He climbed out of bed and started trying to locate his clothes so he could leave. Straight away, Jean Paul was in front of him and holding the t-shirt out of his reach.
"Robert, five minutes that's all I'm talking about. You know I can do it quickly, if it's taking too long I'll just fire them all. We will have our night and you will finish asking me that question."
"There was no question." Bobby mumbled a little self-consciously, already feeling himself talked out of it. He wasn't ready, he'd just gotten a little carried away with himself and in what Jean Paul had been doing at the time, that was all.
"There was, my lover." Jean Paul smiled at him affectionately, one hand resting lightly on Bobby's neck."But only ask it when you really think you're ready. Loosing your virginity is not a small thing. I understand."
Bobby's eyes widened slightly, his cheeks flushing pink. "Don't use that word, I'm not a..."
"You are in that way, Bobby and it's nothing to be ashamed of." Jean Paul kissed him softly "I'm going to be five minutes and no more, I promise you."
Bobby sighed softly, shaking his head as he felt his resolve and annoyance crumbling as he stared into those blue eyes. "OK, fine but I'm not gonna be impressed if this gets to be a regular thing." He didn't want to seem like a pushover or anything.
"It will not happen again." Jean Paul agreed and after Bobby had blinked, he was fully dressed in a smart shirt and sweater with slacks. Even though he knew what power his lover had, moments like this still spun him out and he couldn't help chuckling. He happily returned the kiss that Jean Paul gave him until the phone rang again.
"Five minutes." Bobby said firmly, sinking back onto the bed. Jean Paul smiled, repeated the promise and winked before, suddenly, he was gone.
Bobby made a mental note to inform Jean Paul that using his power during, say, a possible argument would not be acceptable. He pushed that thought aside quickly though since he didn't want to be preparing for fights with Jean Paul when they'd only just started dating. That just felt like he was asking for trouble.
Fidgeting, he looked around himself. He'd never been in here without Jean Paul before, hell until the night before he'd never been here at all. Although he knew it was Jean Paul's room it felt more like a hotel room than someone's bedroom, there just weren't that many personal touches and that actually bugged Bobby a little.
Maybe he should buy some paint at some point but then again maybe not. Jean Paul didn't exactly strike him as a colour person. Just like the room, his new boyfriend did seem to permanently live in monochrome. Bobby wondered what it would take to persuade Jean Paul into some colour and how much fun he could have with the bargaining of such a deal.
So content was he in daydreaming about what exactly he could do to persuade JP to his colourful way of thinking, that Bobby made a stupid error. A knock sounded at the door and he got up to answer it, forgetting momentarily that he was neither dressed nor in his own room until he'd already started to open the door. This left him with two options: close the door and rudely ignore the person or just be thankful for the bed sheet around his waist and embrace whatever was about to happen. He chose to embrace it.
If nothing else it would be an entertaining way to come out to say the least because there was no way that anyone would believe Bobby was naked in the bedroom of his famously gay colleague for any kind of innocent reason.
He opened the door fully and found Annie on the other side, her expression one of comical shock. Bobby chuckled to himself, one hand on the sheet to make sure it didn't slip as he lent against the half open door.
"Hi Annie." He grinned as he watched the school nurse imitate a goldfish. He knew from talking to Jean Paul that it had been Annie's pushing that had eventually made that dinner and the rest of this amazingly turbulent week possible so he just enjoyed the moment without worrying too much about a negative reaction.
"Bobby...?" She said his name softly, as though uncertain of what she was really seeing. The Iceman grinned even more, enjoying himself as he tried not to laugh. He could literally see Annie's thoughts of disbelief and shock turn to joy and excitement in front of his eyes.
"This is Northstar's room...right?" He stifled laughter as she asked him the question. He nodded his response since he didn't quite trust himself to speak just yet.
"Oh God, this is huge!" Annie gasped gleefully, practically bouncing on the balls of her feet. "Jean Paul's in there right? I knew it! I told him not to give up!"
"Er, yeah, we're kind of busy right now Annie, how about you guys catch up tomorrow, yeah?" Bobby suggested, grinning as Annie seemed to grow more and more flustered as she hovered, cleared excited and not certain what to do about it. As much as as he was having fun watching her though, he didn't want anything distracting his lover's attentions when he returned.
"You..." Her eyes trailed down Bobby's body and registering the fact that he's only wearing a sheet and the implications of that fact. "Oh, you two are, oh crap. Um, I'll be going now. Have fun and um, yeah." Her eyes seemed to linger on the hickey and scattered bite marks that Jean Paul had left on Bobby. He hadn't expected Northstar to have been quite so possessive, he couldn't think of any other reason why Jean Paul seemed to enjoy marking him so much other than possessiveness unless he perhaps had a vampire fetish. Not that Bobby was complaining, it was actually a lot of fun.
"Just, don't get carried away, yeah?" She giggled nervously and hurried down the hallway.
Closing the door, Bobby laughed to himself. Sure, he knew Annie would keep the encounter to herself for now but it would definitely going to be a funny story to tell somewhere down the line. His life used to be full of funny stories but lately he'd somewhat been lacking humour in his life. It felt great to be smiling and laughing so much and so often again.
Alone again, he was at a loss as to what to do with himself. Absently, he ran his fingers over the Jean Paul's desk and noticed a book. It was in French and by an author he didn't recognise but still he picked it up out of curiosity. As he flicked over the dog-eared and tired pages of the obviously well-read book, two polaroid photos fell out.
The first, Bobby saw as he picked it up, was of Jeanne Marie. He'd met her a few times in his dealings with Alpha Flight but only briefly and strictly in a professional capacity. He'd never really gotten to know her, only ever spoken to her when it was needed for a mission but he knew that Jean Paul loved her absolutely.
Bobby knew only a little about the twins issues and pasts, Jean Paul had yet to be particularly forthcoming about it but Bobby knew it would come in time. Both Jeanne Marie and Aurora, in Bobby's experience, could be difficult if they wished to be but the photo in his hand showed an entirely different side to her.
In the photo she was sat on a couch, reclined comfortably with a glass of wine in hand and she freely laughed. There was something beautiful and innocent about the photo, something wholely devoid of the turmoil and violence he knew the women had been through and that she herself could cause. Here she was just a girl, a happy girl who Jean Paul loved. Bobby smiled, his forefinger tracing the cascade of silver black hair that tumbled down her back as she laughed.
With a smile, Bobby turned his attention to the second polaroid, expecting it to be another of Jeanne Marie or perhaps Aurora, though he wasn't sure how he'd tell them apart since he wasn't overly familiar with the disparate personalities, or even a photo of the twins together but instead it was a baby.
Bobby looked down at it in surprise, wondering who the baby could be. Then again, he'd heard Jean Paul and Jeanne Marie had largely grown up apart so maybe this was Jeanne Marie as a baby? He wasn't sure who else it could be but then if he didn't know maybe it was because Jean Paul didn't want him to know? Realising belatedly that he was snooping through his new lover's things, Bobby picked up the book to return the photos to their hiding place as a breeze suddenly came through the room.
Odd, Bobby frowned to himself since no doors or windows were open. His confusion quickly cleared as he felt arms coil around his waist, Jean Paul had returned as promised. He smiled as he felt soft kisses on the nape of his neck.
"Didn't even need five minutes." Jean Paul smiled against Bobby's skin as the Iceman lent back into him. "Did you want to ask me about something?" Bobby was still holding the photo of the baby.
"I, I wasn't, I mean I didn't mean to pry. I just picked up the book and these fell out." He said hastily but relaxed as he could still feel Jean Paul smiling into his shoulder "Ok, who is this? Jeanne Marie?"
"Non, it is my daughter." Jean Paul replies matter-of-factly, resting his chin lightly on Bobby's shoulder to look down at the photo too. Bobby frowned, his body tensing as he stared at the image.
"Daughter." He repeated in disbelief. How had he not known this? Why had Jean Paul kept the fact that he was a father secret? Why wasn't this daughter here at the school with him?
"You didn't know? I thought everyone knew, it was in all the newspapers at the time and my book." Jean Paul said softly. Bobby pulled away a little, turning to fully face his lover.
"You never mentioned her, you never told me. Why should I read your damn book to get to know you? I want to get to know you like a real boyfriend, don't just assume I know stuff." He frowned, not liking the idea that the whole world knew this and he didn't. "So, do I get to meet her? Where is she? Did you have some straight phase or something?" He knew he was asking too many questions but he didn't know how else to process this startling news.
He swallowed hard as he saw how stricken Jean Paul looked, his boyfriend's voice barely audible as he explained "She died."
Bobby's mouth dropped open a little bit and wrapped his arms around Jean Paul as he marvelled at what a spectacular ass he'd just been. "God, I'm sorry."
"It was a long time ago." There was still a catch in his voice though and a glassy look to his eyes which didn't meet Bobby's gaze immediately. Bobby nodded and kissed his lips softly.
"I'm shouldn't have asked. I'm sorry, I was being a jerk." He said softly and stroked Jean Paul's cheek tenderly. His boyfriend lent into his touch just a little and though he was distinctly far more sorrowful than before, he didn't seem angry. "We don't need to talk about her if you don't want."
"No, it's fairly common knowledge and I'd rather tell you personally than you find out elsewhere." They sat down on the end of Jean Paul's bed, Bobby still clutching the sheet to himself. He felt very inappropriately dressed for the conversation. He waited silently as Jean Paul began to speak again, listening intently
"She was abandoned and I found her. I named her Joanne. I loved her and...she had AIDS. It had been untreated all her short little life and it was too late. There weren't the treatments there are today. She died." He spoke softly and slowly but matter-of-factly, only his hands gave away his emotions. They were trembling badly and caused Bobby to wrap his arms around Jean Paul tightly, holding him close.
"She was lucky to have you. You showed her love and she didn't die alone. You didn't fail her, never think that." As he murmured in his boyfriend's ear as he held him, stroking his back gently. Eventually, Jean Paul sat back once more and took a deep breath, blinking furiously.
"You have such a huge heart JP," Bobby told him affectionately, taking Jean Paul's hand in his own "Why do you pretend to be such an ass?"
"Why do you pretend to be such a clown?" Jean Paul shot back without venom, his eyebrows raised as he makes his point.
"Ah, touché," Bobby smiled a little as he conceded defeat.
"Finally learning French, hmm? Well, if you're offering I'd love to touch you," The older man returned the smile, leaning in to kiss him softly. Their lips moved together in a slow, intense kiss as they lay back down on the bed together.
Bobby held him tightly though the earlier urgency was gone from the kisses, now he simly felt closer and more intimate with Jean Paul than he could ever remember feeling with anyone. Slowly, he was learning more and more about the man behind the arrogance and he liked that man. He more than liked, he could fall in love with that man. Easily.
"Jean Paul," He sighed softly against Northstar's lips. The other man's eyes opened to meet his own, there was an unspoken question in them as Bobby took a deep breath and tried not to loose his nerve. "I'm ready. I think. No, I know. I'm ready Jean Paul."
"Robert, are you sure mon amour? Are you certain?" Jean Paul asked him very seriously, looking over Bobby's face as though searching for any sign of second thoughts or regret.
"One hundrend percent." Bobby nodded before leaning in and murmuring softly in his lover's sensitive pointed ear, making the older man shiver. "Make love to me."