After four hours of surgery, Red was lifted from the operating table to the bed again. Dr. Strauss handed her patient to the nurses of the intensive care Unit. "In the next 3 hours a blood gas analysis every 30minutes, with lactate, hematokrit and hemoglobin. But I´ll be there in a few minutes.."

While the nurses took Red to the ward, Dr. Strauss went back in the operating room. She had to finish her protocol. She supported her head on her left hand while she writes.
There it was again. That feeling... That feeling she restrained the last five hours. She felt uneasiness. Thoughts ran through her head. THIS was her personal worst case scenario. She had always been professional.
Of course, she gets touched by the fate of her patients. She never let it get personally. She always did her job. Full concentration when the adrenaline rushed thru her vains. When it does she felt only that. Nothing else.
It pushed herself to the limit- and she loved it. That´s why she liked her job so much. The adrenaline made her fast thinking, fast reacting, almost high. Because of that, she was able to laugh or make a joke, even if the situation was really critical.
Later there´s time to think, not when there´s a job to be done.

Now it is this later. This time it really hit her. It hit her harder than punch in the stomach.

Two nurses wiped the blood off the floor. It was his blood. Nausea came over her.

She signed the protocol and left the operating room. Grabbed her surgical cap off.
On the corridor she met Ann again. "Ma'am.. Are you ok? You don´t look very..." "Yes,yes.. Is here a toilet?"she fell in. "Right over there." Ann showed with her finger on a door on the right side. Concerned she looked Dr. Strauss as she went there.

Dr. Strauss had to vomit several times. Her hands were shaking, cold and sweaty. She talked to herself , that she has to look after him. So she forced herself to pull together but it took a while.
With lowered head she left the lavatory and walked into a soldier. "Ah…. I´m sorry Ma'am. Was my fault.." he said. She recognized his warm voice and looked up.

"M- Mel?" stuttered the soldier. "Kelly!" she smiled anguished. Not because she wasn´t happy to see him. She was still sick and she knew, what he would ask next.
"How`s Red?" he asked low. Mel rubbed her forehead. "He got hit by shrapnel, as you surely know. This cut his femoral artery. More problems made a rupture of an abdominal artery.
It was hard to stop bleeding.. We had to reanimate him three times.." her voice trembled with each word more. To talk about it, made it real. She couldn´t fight her tears anymore. She fell around his neck and began to cry unrestrained.
He laid his arms around her. "Actually I dunno if he´ll survive…"she sobbed. He hugged and comforted her. "I`m sure you did all what you could.." She struggled for composure. "What about you? Are you ok? " "Don´t worry for me- only a few scratches."
"I´m happy to hear that, Lake. But now I have to go to the ICU to check him." she wiped the tears away. He caresses her cheek. "It`s ok.. Please tell me, if you´re getting any news. And would you ask for Flea? I´ve heard he`s here... Not more."
"I will. Thank you, Lake." She gave him a friendly kiss on the cheek and made her way to the ICU.

As Mel arrived there, Red was already connected to all medical devices he needed. So she just looked after his medication. Maybe there´s something to optimize. When she was done, she fell on the chair next to his bed.
It was five o'clock in the morning right now. Tired, with burning eyes, she yawned when Ann appeared next to her. Her smiling had gone and she looked worried at the German doctor. It was obvious, that Mel had cried.
"Ma'am.. Do you know him personally? I´ve heard you called him by his nickname.."

Tears shot again in her eyes but Mel wiped them away quickly. "Yes, " she said hoarse "we had a relationship two years ago" Ann didn´t know what to say. So she sat next to the Doc and handed her silently a cup of coffee. "You´re an angel, Ann!"
Sipping her coffee, Mel took Red`s hand . She noticed that the nurses washed the blood and dirt from his body and cared for his smaller wounds. Now he looked more than the man she knew. He wasn't that pale as before the surgery.
Except the tubus and the medical devices he really looked like when she woke up next to him the last time. Red had often smaller cuts or bruises. That wasn't unusual to for her to see. Mel watched his chest raise and lower in the rhythm of the ventilator.
It was too early to remove the tubus. He won´t be able to breathe on himself yet. Red`s hand was quite warm now. She suggested it as a good sign.

While observing him the fatigue and the monotone sound of the monitors let her fell into a kind of daydream…