Chapter 8: First confession

POV: Juice

We headed to Church and got an update on Clay's recovery. As usual Tig insists on immediate retaliation. Prez Jax won't hear it. He tells us we have to be smart about this. We're still deep with the Cartel. Though Lincoln Potter being off my back is a relief, and Roosevelt has keep his distance since he handed me my file, I've hacked his computer and found no trace of our meetings or my lock ups. It doesn't mean I'm scot free either. He can come back at any time and sell me out to the Club. With tensions high, I don't know what will happen. Clay would have offed me even if it was behind the Club's back. Jax, I'm not sure off. There's tension between him and Ope. Bobby's getting at them because it's obvious. We vote for immediate retaliation. It doesn't pass. Chibs, Ope, and me head out to our meeting with the Grim Bastards to negotiate the sale of guns that normally would have taken place with the One Niners. Jax, Bobby, and Happy head out to negotiate with the Mayans. Tig is irritable as usual with his house arrest to the Club. I re-think todays move and decide that Marta not setting foot in the Club without me. I don't want Tig getting out of line again with her. As soon as this meet is over I'm going to pick her up and take her home. I'm going to enjoy tonight. Her guard is down and she's ready to be mine. I'm getting hard just thinking about it.

"Gemma, can I ask you a favor?"

"Sure, Juice. What'd you need?"

"Keep Tig away from my girl. As a matter a fact, keep him away from Happy's too. He's been warned but you know Tig."

"Yeah, Chuckie filled me in. Congratulations!"

"Thanks, Gemma. By the way I'm glad to hear about Clay getting stronger. It'll work out."

"Thanks, Juice. I'm counting on that."

5 hours later…..

Negotiations were a trip but the Grim Bastards know how it is. We don't front. Years of our collaboration, and a discount on the guns will buy us the protection we need when things get dirty with Laroy and the Niners. I smoke my last cigarette in the pack and head into the Club.

There she is, my girl. Tight skinny black jeans, a snug v-neck tank, and combat boots knee high. She's playing pool with Rat, Phil, and her sister. I come up behind her and scare her. She elbows me in the stomach. She turns and points the pool stick at me. She drops it when she realizes she hit me.

"Papi, I'm sorry. I'm still jumpy."

"It's ok, baby. You get ready to go?" I clutch my stomach and cough.

"Did you eat? I helped make dinner with Chuckie?" I shake my head yes. Guys and I ate at the bar with the Bastards. I'm glad to see she can cook. Guess, my kitchen will get some use now. She looks a little disappointed so I tell Rat to make me a plate to go. She hugs her sister goodbye. She thanks the Prospects, Gemma, Chuckie, and even the croweaters. Her sweetness amazes me. She grabs a jean jacket and hands me money. It's the change she says. I take it and notice she hasn't spent much which is asserted when I see she doesn't have a big bag. She's not a gold digger that for sure. She even offers to pay me back when she goes home. I almost forgot she would have to go back to Oakland at some point. I don't want her to go, but I'm sure she'll come back. Her uncle's going to give her grief. I've never been good with parents. Then again the last I met a girl's parent was junior prom back in Queens. That's some high school shit. I shake it off. Why worry now. Gemma nods approvingly as we head out. I put her bag in my back pack and hand her my helmet.

We get back to my house in no time. I jump in the shower and ask her to heat up the food. Maybe its nerves but I'm hungry. I come out in my boxers and sit down. Chicken and yellow rice with chick peas reminds me of my mom's cooking. She even opens a bottle of Corona for me. It's so good I regret now asking Rat to pack me two plates. She smiles gingerly as I devour her meal. She tries to wash out the container but I can't wait anymore.

I lead her to the bedroom and remove her jacket as I kiss her neck. I start to undo her jeans when she resists.

"Juan Carlos, there's something I need to tell you about me. I'm…." I kiss her and put my finger to her lips. I tell her there is nothing I need to know. I want her to be mine. I ask her if she wants this too. She tells me yes and starts her next sentence with "but". I don't let her finish. I carry her onto bed and undress her. I kiss her everywhere. I take in her beautiful curvy body. She has phoenix tattoo on her lower back. Her left shoulder has a quote inked "Ardet Nec Consumitur". Latin, I know. That Catholic school education is something else we have in common. She tells me it means, "Burned but not consumed".

I enter her and I realize what she wanted to tell me. I feel privileged to be the first and last. After tonight, I'll never let any other man touch her. I understand her reluctance now. I'm so grateful for her gift to me. I make love to her gently so I don't hurt her too much. She moans, gasps, and says my name. My name has never sounded so good on a woman's lips. Most don't even know that's my name.

"Baby, thank you. But I have to ask why me?" I ask when we finish.

"Because you're the first I've ever felt this way about. I feel like I'm finally home around you. I think I love you, Juan Carlos." I kiss her. I hold her tight and nestle my head on her chest.

"I love you too, Marta." I fall asleep as she caresses my head.