Disclaimer: I do not own this show or it's characters
Authors Note: Thanks for all the reviews everyone. I hope that you like this chapter. Please tell me what you think and review afterwards. Thank you : )
My Confusing Feelings
Everything was perfect today. It was sunny, bright and a lively day for anyone, well anyone but me for the spur of the moment. Horrible, I felt like I couldn't get up from my bed. Either I was way too lazy or something was wrong with me. I really didn't want to think that something was wrong with me cause that just made me feel worse.
You might be wondering about my sudden odd behavior. Well, it's nothing new. Today was a Sunday, a typical Sunday. I had school again tomorrow so spending some more time for myself or with my friends would be a wise decision, but somehow I didn't feel like it. I needed some time to myself. It made me think back to last night when Yama talked to me, I guess I was getting worried again wasn't I? But who could help it, especially after all that?
Flashback…Last Night
I walked with Yama to his room and then as we got in, he offered me a seat. Things were pretty quiet at first and it was getting a bit too awkward so I decided to start some kind of conversation.
"So…is something wrong?" we were back to question one
"I guess you could say that." He replied
"Yama I really do want to help you, but I how can I if you won't open up?" I asked, I never noticed that my voice was becoming pleading and softer than I would have wanted it to.
"Sorry, I just didn't want to drag you into this you know? It doesn't feel right to put you in this situation. Makes me feel selfish." Replied Yamato
"You're not, I was the one being persistent in the first place. I should be the one apologizing, don't you think so?" I asked him
"No, not really." He replied with a sigh
"Was is really that bad?" I asked, it never occurred to me how bad hi problem could have been
"Maybe, now it looks like I'm just overreacting." He told me and then he asked "How much do you know?"
"How much do I know?" I asked, just repeating his question
"Yeah, how…well, what did Tai and the others tell you about what was going on?" he asked me again and then I understood.
"They didn't tell me much, just that well…you were having problems with your dad and all that." I told him, I was trying to keep things simple
"Did they tell you what it was about? The problem I mean…" he asked again
I nodded slightly and replied "Kind of."
"What did they say?" he asked
"They said that you think your dad was cheating, you know on your mom." I told him
"I see…." He stayed silent for a while after that
"Is it true?" I asked, suddenly breaking the silence
"Huh?" he asked me
"Is that true, about your dad?" I asked again
"Truthfully I might be jumping to conclusions, that's why I told you I might be overreacting." Said Yamato
"Do you think it is?" I asked
"I don't want it to be, but I think so." He told me "It's hard for me; being the one who had to live with him anyway. He was the one who filed the divorce with my mom; he doesn't have to make it worse."
"How does T.K feel about this?" I asked, I suddenly remembered all about T.K
"He doesn't talk about it with me. He knows I kind of don't like the topic, but I'm not sure how he's taking it yet." He told me with a sigh
"…" I stayed silent for a while then asked "How did this turn into a fight over the phone?"
"He just called you know, unexpectedly. Then things kind of got ugly after that." Said Yamato
"Tai and the others said something of similar thought." I told him
"Like what?" he asked confused
"They said that, whenever your dad would call…nothing good would come out of it." I told him a bit hesitant
"That's just about right." He replied plainly like this want new to him
"Sorry, I didn't mean to bring things back." I apologized
"No, I'm used to it, maybe my dad and I will just never get along." Said Yamato
"Do you…really think that?" I asked softly
"Hm?" he asked me
"I mean, maybe…it's something else." I told him
He was looking at me now, a mix of confusion and a bit of surprise on his face. I ignored that for a while and just continued. "Maybe, you're dad doesn't have to start everything. You do."
"Enlighten me." He simply stated
"Well, you said that everything started and turned out this was since the whole divorce thing right?" I asked and he nodded "You said your dad never tried to fix things, he just made it worse."
"And?" asked Yamato
"Maybe, you have to make it better Yama. He can't…but you can." I replied simply
"How? What can I possibly do?" he asked a bit confused at my suggestion
"You can talk to him." I suggested, I kind of thought that was a bad thing at first seeing as how he never got along with his father but who knows?
"He won't listen." His voice was getting a bit colder now
"Yama…" I started. You see, we were seated quite close to each other, so reaching for his hand wasn't a problem. As I held his hand I felt him freeze a bit but I continued "How could you know that? When was the last time you talked to him?"
"Earlier this…." Before he could finish I cut him off
"Without starting a fight and having hate all over?" I added
"…" he stayed silent. I knew I was right
"See?" I stated "When?"
"I…don't really remember the last time we had a serious and peaceful talk." He told me with a sigh
"Then that's all the more reason you should try." I told him with a smile
"What if it doesn't do any good?" he asked
"Yama, you're not supposed to think that way. It will turn out fine." I assured him
"You don't know my dad like I do Sor, he won't just smile and listen." He told me
"I know, I never meant for the talk to be in his favor." I explained "You have to find ways to make him listen, make him see that you're right and he's wrong. Just because you're his son doesn't mean you can't lecture him once in a while."
"You're saying I should just…tell him everything?" he asked
"Would it hurt to try? If it doesn't work then at least you know you did something." I told him "It's better than fighting for the rest of your lives you know."
We stayed silent for a while and I knew that he was thinking about it. I simply smiled "Just think about things okay? I won't force you to do it, but think about it. Thanks for sharing with me."
I started to get up from my seat at this point, seeing as it was getting late. As I was slowly walking my way to the exit I spoke again. "And Yama?"
I could tell he looked up. "I just want you to know that I know you'll do something about this. It's a normal thing, I used to have that kind of issues with my mom. Anyway, good luck and feel free to talk to me again or with the guys, it would help you." I paused for a while then continued "A lot of people care about you, so please feel better. I know I care about you…"
Those were the last words I remembered before I darted out of his room and soon I walked back to my own….
End of Flashback….
Agh, I buried my head back into my pillow and I honestly think I've gone mad. I didn't know what was keeping me here. There was this part of me that wanted to know what Yama was doing, but for some reason, there was also a part of me that didn't. That's it, I've made my decision….
I went over the phone to dial Jou's house number just hoping that Meems would be there, because I really needed to open up right now.
Mimi's P.O.V.
I woke up a little late today. I woke up and found myself on the sofa of the living room, I almost forgot that after T.K's chat with Kari last night most of us woke up about 2am in the morning and we all just watched some movie to help us get some sleep. I got up and saw Koushiro there beside me, the only difference was he was sitting down on the other edge of the sofa.
I scanned the room and found some of the others asleep on the floor. Specifically Davis, Cody and Ken. I got up and that's about when I felt the sofa move. I looked beside me and Koushiro was up, that wasn't new. He usually got up with Jou before anyone else did.
"Hey, you awake?" he asked
"Most likely yeah *yawn*" I told him silently
He looked below and saw Davis and the others too. "Looks like the movie did it's job. They're pretty much knocked out."
"I know, man we're up pretty late today." I replied, then something hit me "Say, where's Jou?"
"He's probably up already. You know how he is." He told me and I nodded. Jou must be out early or something.
Suddenly, the phone started to ring .I glanced over at Koushiro and he picked it up. He was the one beside the telephone anyway. "Hello?" I heard him ask, and then it was followed by something like "Yeah, she's here. Just hold on and let me get her okay?"
After that, he turned to me and spoke "It's Sor, she wants to talk to you, She sounds bad."
"Okay…." I replied "Why would Sor call at a time like this?" I thought to myself. I thought she'd be up with Tai and the others already, unless something happened.
"Did something happen Meems?" asked Koushiro curiously and he held my hand
"Don't know, but I'll talk to her about it. I'll try to tell you later." I assured him with a smile
I got the phone from Koushiro, he excused himself, then I was alone to talk with Sor. I was the only one left awake anyway.
"Hey Sor what's up?"
"Meems I need help…."
"Why? Did something happen"
"Nope, well not really, but yes kind of…."
"Sor, which is it?"
"A little bit of both…."
"Mind telling me what happened?"
"I had a talk with Yama…last night…."
"That's supposed to be a good thing isn't it? You got to talk so it's good right?"
"He opened up about some things…and I guess I got to help, a little if it counts…."
"Isn't that supposed to be like, another good thing? He opened up to you Sor!"
"I know that…."
"Then what's bothering you?"
"Well, it's this feeling I have that's bothering me…it's weird and new and….awkward."
"A good feeling or a bad one?"
"I'm not sure….both?"
"What's it like? And why'd you say new?"
"All weird and…well….I can't explain it."
"Does it have something to do with Yamato?"
"Kind of…I think so…"
"Ah…"
"What's 'Ah' supposed to mean?"
"How weird is it? Describe it, and I need details, as much as possible."
She told me as little info as she could about Yamato's problem, which I didn't mind. Then we got back to those strange feelings of hers.
"I was happy he opened up to me, a bit lonely finding out about his problem and I just felt like I needed to do something to make him feel better or my guilt was going to eat me alive."
"Sor, you always feel that way when someone has a problem. Why's this any different?"
"I don't know….especially after I said that last part…."
"Last part? What last part? What did you say Sor?" My voice got a bit excited
"Calm down. I just told him I knew he's fix things…"
"And?" I knew it didn't end there
"I told him people cared about him and wanted him to feel better…" short pause "Then I said that I was sure that I cared for him too…."
I stayed silent at that and then a few seconds later….. "That's great!"
"How is that supposed to help me?"
"Sor, come on you should have seen this coming!" I told her
"Seen what coming?!?"
".him."
There was another silence on the other line, this time it was longer though… "Sor? You still there?"
"You're kidding me right?"
"Oh come on, you have to have seen this."
"No, that's not possible, Meems…."
"You know I'm not joking, wasn't this a bit too obvious. Sor he's already asked you on a date!"
"It wasn't a…"
"Oh no, stop denying it. I know you're new at this but stop it please…"
"You're telling me I like the guy just because I told him I cared? I tell Tai that all the time."
"True, but you never did feel anything for Tai, you just said something was different with Yamato. Besides, all of us can see a connection, have you seen him look at you?"
"Yeah, but how would I know?"
"Isn't that why you called to begin with? Come on Sor, if you won't admit it you can always start with a crush…."
"That's not my problem! I can't get this."
"That's because you keep denying it. What's there to be afraid of anyway, rejection? Please, you know that's not happening."
"No I'm not afraid of rejection."
"Then what is it? Or can't you just admit something's there?"
"Meems I told you, I never wanted to get into a relationship. I went here to find Tai, get a scholarship even, but meeting and going as far as to like a rock star was not in the deal!"
"Love comes in the most unexpected places you know."
"And what? Mine just happened to be half way across the country?"
"You never know…."
"Meems…."
"Sor, look why don't you just give it some time and think about it okay?"
"Alright…"
"Just give it some thought, this is new to you. Apparently you can be oblivious at times too, and I'm just telling you what I think…"
"I know…I guess I just didn't expect that…"
"Think about it, you'll see. You never know, but I could still be right. He's a nice guy you know…"
"Meems…"
"I'm just saying…"
"That's it I guess, thanks for listening to me Meems. I really appreciate it."
"Okay, any time. I'd let you talk to Kari, but she's still asleep in her room. T.K called last night."
"Aw, that's nice. What about you?"
"I need to take a shower, I woke up with Davis and the others during 2am in the morning. Watched a movie to help get some shut eye."
"Harsh…"
"I know, I'll have bags in my eyes."
"Nah, you're too pretty for that."
"Funny, and speak for yourself."
"Anyway, I better let you take your shower. Thanks again."
"Anytime Sor, anytime. Oh and once you figure it out, we'll talk okay?"
"Sure, if I figure it out."
"Oh I think you will…."
"Heh, thanks. See you soon Meems. I'll try to visit after school if I can."
"Okay, I look forward to seeing you. Bye Sor."
"Bye Meems, thanks again."
And that marked the end of our conversation. I still think that in my own way, that she liked him and vice versa, but I could never know for sure right? I do hope things work out for them both and that Yamato get's through that problem of his. That's about the last of it before I walked to my room, get my clothes and took a nice warm shower.
Yamato's P.O.V.
I stayed in my room, thinking of the conversation I had with her last night. Something was wrong with me. I can't get her off of my head and something was definitely wrong with me. I was snapped out of my thoughts, when suddenly a knock was heard.
I went to the door, and when I got it, I saw Tai there standing with his goofy grin and so were the other guys, and T.K too.
"Sup Yamato?" asked Tai "Can we come in?"
"Sure thing Tai, whatever…." I told him plainly and they all came inside my room
As they went inside, they sat down on the chairs and faced me while I sat on my bed. Tai looked over at me seriously and asked "So, are you doing okay now?"
"Yeah, I'm doing great Tai, super." I told him a bit sarcastically
"Right, sure you are Yamato. Come on, did your dad piss you off again? Or did something else happen?" asked Takashi
"The issue with my dad….I thought about it. I might talk to him about it." I told them and the shock printed on their faces wasn't that hard to miss, in fact it was too obvious.
" Are you sure about that?" asked T.K "You don't have to do this."
"I want or rather need to. Let's try something new Teeks. For all our sakes." I told him seriously and sincerely.
"That's new…" stated Tai and I knew he was going to ask anyway so I just waited for it and he did ask eventually "So, what actually brought this on?"
"I knew it…" I muttered
"He's right though, what happened. You were never all into talking to your dad, so what brought the change?" asked Yutaka
"I was able to talk to Sora…last night…" I told them and they stayed silent "She brought in the idea, she suggested that it could change things."
"I see….so it was Sor…why isn't that such a surprise." Said Akira
"Hm, that's true…." Stated Tai with a smile "What'd she tell you exactly?"
"She told me that maybe it'd be nice if I started to make the change instead of waiting for my dad to do it." I told them
"And you decided to take it?" asked Yutaka
"I won't die trying and I guess it is worth a shot. She didn't force me into this, I just thought about it." I replied
"That's nice...at least you'd have some kind of closure with your dad." Said Tai
"She does have a point though, you can't just leave him just because he told you to back off. He might be your dad but he also makes his mistakes." Said Akira silently
"It's like telling you something along the lines of: 'If your dad told you to jump off a cliff, would you?'" said Takashi
"You can't do everything he tells you, especially if you know that it's wrong." Said Akira
"That's beyond true." Said Yutaka with a light laugh
"Can we stop it about my dad. This is something I need to think about, mostly on my own. I don't even know how I'll get him to talk to me." I told them with a sigh
"Just sneak up on him. He doesn't care when you come home anyway right?" suggested Yutaka
"Right, and how do I make him listen?" I asked. I knew convincing my dad to talk wouldn't be as easy as he puts it.
"Come on, let's leave Yamato to do this on his own. This was his choice and no one else's okay." Said Tai and for a few minutes I actually felt thankful and relieved, but not for long cause' soon Tai said something else. "I wanted to ask him something else anyway."
"Great, more Q&A's" I thought with a sigh
Tai must have noticed my mood and spoke "Come on, it's not that bad. I just wanted to know….have you talked to Sor today yet?"
"No, not really." I replied
"Why not?" I thought you'd be close after you opened up to her for advice." Said Takashi in wonder
"Things…didn't turn out that way. Not exactly." I replied
"Did something else happen last night?" asked T.K
"Nothing…." I lied
"Sure, that's why you're so bummed." Takashi rolled his eyes at my reply
"Mind telling us what's really bugging you?" asked Yutaka
I knew I couldn't escape this. They wouldn't stop until they get something out of me. So I ended up telling them what happened. I stopped at the part when she said she cared and left the room. That's about when things went silent in my room. I would have been grateful, if it wasn't for all the awkwardness.
"Can you guys at least say something? You guys wanted a story and I just gave it to you." I told them hoping one of them would talk.
Tai was the one who broke the silence "Um…let me get this straight, you're pissed because she told you she cared? That's just…wrong."
"No, I am not upset about that!" I replied "Just confused."
"About what?" asked Akira
"I don't know, her words just hit me. I don't usually care about stuff like that." I replied
"I see, so you're…not sure how you feel?" he asked
"Sort of?" I asked a bit of a question more than a statement
I think I've been too occupied to notice anything because a few minutes later the others started laughing their heads off.
"Guys…mind telling me what's so funny?" I asked with a sigh
"You are." Replied Tai
"And why is that?" I asked calmly
"Didn't we already tell you? You like her Yamato, big time." Said Yutaka
"I know." I replied plainly
They stopped laughing and looked at me. I just stared back and soon I spoke "What?"
"You know that you like her?" asked Takashi questioningly
"If I didn't, would I have asked her to spend a day with me?" I asked knowingly "Why is that such a shock? Did you guys think I didn't know how I felt?"
"You were the one who said you were confused." Said Takashi as he shook his head
"If that's the case, then you admit that you like her?" asked Akira
"Yeah." I replied. I wouldn't admit this in front of Sor, but I can't lie to myself either.
"…" Tai suddenly became silent and then he spoke soon enough "So, you like Sor…that's not new. But it's new that you're just admitting it now."
"Sorry about that. I kind of realized it not too long ago too." I replied honestly
"Then what are you so confused about?" asked Yutaka "If you know how you feel and you can admit it, what else is there."
"This is just my side. I don't know how she feels. Besides, I told you I didn't want to rush things, not in my state. I just met her. We've known each other for what? Weeks? Almost a month?" I asked "I don't even know if this is right."
"What's not right about liking someone? This is your one chance to even like someone, you never did." Said Takashi and most of them agreed. They knew I never liked dating girls.
"Please, I haven't known her long. What is this, love at first sight?" I asked
"You never know. She's the first girl you've ever liked seriously right? So we can't really judge." Said Yutaka
"I know that…" I replied
"You shouldn't worry about this. There's just about a few things you need to worry about and remember if it's Sor." Said Tai
"Of course, he'd know. This was his best friend we're talking about." I thought
"If you decide to tell her, once you're sure about your feelings. Make sure you won't regret it, and you won't make her regret it. I'm not rushing you. Just once you're sure, make sure you'll stick to your decision." He told me
You see, this was a side of Tai I rarely get to see, but he's making sense. "I know that Tai, you'd rip me apart if I did something crazy."
"Yeah. I would wouldn't I?" he said with a slight laugh "Anyway, the point is you have to think about this carefully kay?"
"I know that Tai, that's why I'm confused. I have my feelings to make sure of, and her feelings to consider." I replied
"You'll think of it. She's going to be here till' senior year. You have years ahead of you to think about it." Said T.K
"He's right. Besides I doubt she's going to get into some kind of relationship anyway." Said Tai
"Why wouldn't she? Yamato has dozens of competition in school." Said Takashi and seeing the guys in school, he was right about that.
"Yeah, but Sor's not fond of sudden relationships like most girls in school. She's different here remember? If she wasn't, then Yamato wouldn't even be confused about anything." Said Tai
"It's cool, I'll think of this." I told them
"Just try not to take too long, you can't avoid her forever. You have the whole day." Said Tai with a smirk
"Thanks Tai." I replied with a smile
Soon they all left my room and gave me some time to think. I really took in what they said. I had things in my head right now pilling up into one big something inside my head. From my dad, to Sora to me. I needed some time with myself. I knew I couldn't ignore her forever, Tai was right about that. Now I just needed time, hopefully that'd be enough to give me answers.
Something I need to ask myself: What am I going to do now?
Authors Note: Thanks for all the reviews everyone. I was happy I got to update a bit earlier now. Thanks and please tell e what you think about this chapter : )