Author's note: I'm sorry it took so long for this to be updated, but ALL the things happened! lol. I hope you enjoy it. It's kind of angsty. As to the song at the end, I prefer the Evanescence cover to the Korn original, but Lacey and I agreed stating that it was the Korn version was more appropriate. I hope you agree.

Chapter Five

Sebastian awoke with a hangover to rival all hangovers. His head pounded. His body ached. He didn't want to get out of bed. But they were so close to Regionals that he had to go to school. He showered, lingering in there as nausea washed over him.

It became too much and he threw himself out of the shower and hovered over the toilet, expelling everything he ate in the last 24 hours. It felt like he was losing everything he'd ever eaten, tearing his insides apart. His body hurt even more as the vomiting subsided.

As he sat down to breakfast a few minutes later, he was glad for the large, greasy breakfast their cook always made. He usually skipped it, not wanting to face his father. He'd pick up an apple or something on his way out the door. But he needed more today.

Laird took in his son's bloodshot eyes. "You were out pretty late last night." He commented as he spooned eggs into his mouth.

"And you care?" Sebastian snapped. He shoveled food into his mouth. They were supposed to have early rehearsal that morning and he was already on the verge of being late. He needed food just a little more than he needed to rehearse.

"I do care."

"Bullshit." He spat as he took a bite of his sausage.

His father just looked at him. Then he raised his newspaper in front of his face with a sigh. "Fine, get yourself killed." He mumbled. "I wouldn't have to worry about you then."

Sebastian stared at the newspaper dumbfounded. He shot up from his chair and threw a piece of toast at the paper.

Laird lowered it and stared angrily at his son.

"You're such an asshole, Dad."

"I'm merely stating a fact."

"What the hell kind of fact is that?"

"I don't care if you don't believe it. I care about you, son. You're all I have."

"Really? You care about the son that killed your wife?"

"I don't know where you get that impression—"

"You've never said it to my face, but I've heard you say it. Cut the crap, Dad. You only care about your image." He stomped out of the house. He threw his car into gear and zoomed out of the driveway.

As soon as he stepped into the choir room, Sebastian was bombarded with questions about his tardiness. He had been the one to call the extra rehearsal after all.

He snapped, "Shut the hell up and get into formation. I want to run through as much of this as possible before class."

They started the intro to the first song. Sebastian struggled through it. He was so terribly out of breath and almost smashed into a wall. He yelled at everyone else, refusing to blame his alcohol consumption. He also didn't think he deserved the blame because he used every available moment to rehearse, unlike the rest of the group. They were the lazy-asses who just took enough time to learn the song and moves.

"We go to Regionals in just over a week! Learn your shit!" He picked up his bag and stormed out of the room just before the first bell rang.

He fell asleep in his first hour class, giving him lunch detention. In second period he snapped at his teacher for telling him to pay attention, getting him another day of detention. Somehow he made it through third and fourth without incident, though every droning word out of his teachers' mouths made him want to punch a daycare full of babies.

As he got up to leave the classroom to get his tray and go to his first detention, he slammed into the back of one of his classmates.

"What the fuck is your problem? Don't you know how to walk, Davis?" Sebastian yelled.

"I'm sorry, Sebastian." Davis demurred. He'd seen the bad side of this young man's temper.

"Sorry? You're sorry?" He shoved the other guy. "Move your ass out of my way. I got somewhere to be."

"Calm down, it was an accident."

Sebastian dropped his bag. "It wasn't a fucking accident. You need to learn to walk."

"You learn to watch where you're going." Davis countered.

Without warning, Sebastian swung the perfect right hook into Davis's eye. The other boy charged, but the teachers quickly intervened before any other damage could be done. They were hauled to the office and their parents were called.

Laird Smythe was quick to try to put the blame somewhere else stating, "I think it's the delayed reaction to not having a mother."

"He's been acting out for a while." Principal Mitchell said. "We just turned a blind eye because it was never anything bad. Talking back and arguing on occasion, giving him the occasional detention. But today it's gone too far. Sebastian is hung-over and he got into a fight. This school has a zero tolerance policy on fighting. I'm told he already earned himself two detentions today." He sighed, "I hate to do it, Mr. Smythe, but I'm suspending your son for the rest of the week. I don't want him stepping foot on school property for any reason. That includes Warbler rehearsal."

"He's not going to be happy about that."

"He should have thought about that before he picked a fight on school property."

"Understood. By me at least. I'll have someone come back for his car later this afternoon." He shook the principal's hand and then walked out to the lobby. "Come on Sebastian." He said icily.

The ride home was silent other than Laird explaining his suspension. He sent Sebastian to his room.

He considered fighting it, but he still felt like crap, so he went willingly.

He laid on his bed for a while, suffering from the worst boredom he'd ever experienced. How was he going to make it through the suspension? He found his hidden bottle of whiskey and took a swig. It burned, but he loved it.

He took another couple pulls and was feeling much better. He paced his room. He walked to the window and witnessed the return of his car. He stared longingly at his baby as his father talked with the intern that brought it back.

The guy got into another car that had followed. Laird watched the car drive away. Then he walked around his son's car slowly. He shook his head, pocketed the keys, and disappeared back inside.

Sebastian stood for a while longer, staring at his car. He rummaged in his bedside drawer until he found his spare key. He tried to casually walk down to his car, but his father was on the stairs.

"What do you think you're doing?" Laird demanded when he saw the keys in his son's hand.

"I'm going out."

"You're suspended from school."

"School's over by now. I wasn't going there anyway."

"You're not going anywhere. You're grounded."

"Look at you finally stepping up." Sebastian mocked. "I don't need this." He tried to walk around his father, but Laird caught his arm. "Let go of me."

"You're not leaving this house, Sebastian."

"Oh, yeah? Watch me." He wrenched his arm out of his father's grasp and started storming away.

"I should have sent you off when I had the chance."

"Yeah, you should have. Anywhere else is better than here." He slammed the door and stomped to his car.

He didn't see the hurt look on his father's face as he walked away.

As it roared to life, Sebastian suddenly grew angrier. Who said stuff like that? And to their own kid? He put a CD into the slot and turned the radio up as loud as it would go. Korn blared from the speakers.

Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies.

Pushing all my mercy down, down, down

I wanna see you take a swing at me, come on

Gonna put you on the ground, ground, ground

He punched the repeat button and just drove. He didn't know where he was going, but he really didn't care. He just had to get away.

He sang along to the song. Well, yelled was a bit more like it. He owned a few more lyrical versions of this song, but this one was more fitting to his mood.

He looked down to see he was running low on gas. He didn't really feel like stopping. He loved his car more than anything, so he thought better of letting it die on him. And putting a charge on his father's credit card also felt good.

But still not good enough. He drove on.

All of my hate cannot be bound

I will not be drowned

By your thoughtless scheming

So you can try to tear me down

Beat me to the ground

I will see you screaming