I'm so sorry! I'm an awful person. I've actually had this written for . . . well, a month, I was just too lazy to get it beta'd.

I hope you enjoy it; even with the ridiculous wait for this chapter . . .

Last Time on Destiny and Love:

The decapitated head was then brought underneath the hood of the man, so close that I couldn't even see the head behind the darkness which surrounded the man. Just as my curiosity almost overtook me and I was about to step forward a squelching crunch vibrated through the air. The noise stopped me in my tracks. It was followed by the snap of teeth chewing and then a loud swallow. To my horror the man brought the head out from beneath his hood. The woman's head now had an oozing hole, the size of a mouth, on her left temple.

My vision shifted dramatically, as did my awareness. I could once again hear Gaius' voice, now frantic, right beside my ear; his breath warming the side of my face. I could also feel the cool floor that my palms and forehead were resting upon. My breathing was erratic, my body and mind still in turmoil from the whole experience.

As Gaius' voice grew louder I let out a shaky breath, trying to prepare myself for the explanation that I would be asked for. Turns out that I needn't worry about such matters at that moment, for when I opened my eyes my vision twirled. The wooden ground beneath me became a haze as black and white spots all flashed in my eyes. My consciousness immediately eluded me.

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin . . . in this universe.

CHAPTER SEVEN

-Mindscape-

I was being attacked. There were so many memories, thoughts, images, and feelings. I was sure that my brian was going to explode from all of the information. How could it not? It was as if every mind in Camelot, and perhaps beyond, was open for me to see. For me to peruse. Although right now it felt as though the thoughts were being pushed upon me. Every one of them fighting for dominance in my mind; effectively causing a loud cacophony of words that all shouted and overlapped one another.

I could't find myself within it all. I was everyone. I was lost and it felt as though I would never return. The others were overriding my own sense of self. This left me in a dangerous predicament; if they didn't leave soon I was going to be lost forever. They had to leave, or perhaps I had to dominate them.

I had to summon the strength. The strength that I had gained from living the life I had. The strength from the fear that I had been accompanied by every day of my life. The strength I was given by others who believed in me. The strength I was given by magic. My magic. It had always been there and would continue to be there for me. It defined who I was and what I did. It was my strength.

With the thoughts now reverberating around the walls of my own mind, quieting the others, I felt my eyes begin to burn; soon followed by the rest of my body. The magic was fighting back; I was fighting back. I was encased in the brilliance that was magic and all I felt was an overwhelming sensation of acceptance, of love.

The other voices and minds had all been silenced by the display. Judging by the feel I got from them, they were entranced. The magic had truly enthralled them. I couldn't help but laugh. My magic was sending out love to everyone. To those in pain, those who were brimming with sadness, even those who already had love. My magic and I, being one and the same, did our best to calm all of those who had entered our realm; who had entered my mind. They deserved the happiness that we so readily gave them; even those who had been corrupted by something did indeed need our love-if not more so.

The voices slowly began to leave; they were content. They had received what they had come for and more. If only the voices weren't just the subconscious thoughts of those around me. If they weren't I would have been able to cure most of the despair that lingered in those around me with just this simple action. Unfortunately all I had managed to do was succeed in ceasing the attack that had been waged against me.

I was finally able to rest. After all of the mental assaults that I had been submitted to today, the unawareness that began to surround me now was utter bliss.

My ears were the first to awaken. The first to acknowledge that anything was happening around me; other than my magic, which was always protecting me, especially in slumber.

The noise around me was dead, except for the soft movement of air caused by breath. If I stretched my hearing sense even further I could hear the shuffling of feet on stone further away from the breathing sound. Extending my sense to its very limit, without the assistance of magic, I could hear the movements of many throughout the castle. Some were running from one place to another, others pacing with sporadic steps.

My feeling of touch was the next to come back. Instead of the cool hard floor beneath my fingertips as I had expected there was a soft, warm, pliable substance giving in beneath the pressure I applied. My head was resting on an equally comfortable substance; all in all I was very comfortable and I was definitely not on the ground. I had been moved.

I tried to think back to exactly why I had thought I would be on the floor in the first place, considering when I usually woke up I was in my bed, my complete confusion at this fact was a bit disconcerting. Why would I believe that I would awaken on the ground?

I kept my eyes closed and activated my mind into a state of complete concentration and reflection. I searched through my memories, attempting to understand when I had fallen asleep; hoping that this information would cause more of an understanding to my initial reaction to the place in which I found myself when my senses returned.

The surface thoughts were the first ones I bypassed, the types of thoughts that were always playing in the subconscious of everyone's mind. They were superficial and mundane thoughts, best left for the subconscious to dwell upon while the conscious mind took care of more intricate and pressing matters.

I continued to delve deeper and deeper within my subconscious looking for the memories that I had unconsciously blocked. They were obviously traumatic memories, the type of memories which no one wished to remember. The type of memories which one would suppress because of pain and hate. The type of memories filled with pain and depression. The type of memories which one had a hate for, a type of hate which made you want to do something drastic. Something that you would most likely later regret. It was obviously a memory which the mind hid in order to keep sane; for with it one would break and although I knew this, I continued the search. I was much too inquisitive for my own good.

The deeper I went inside my mind the more pain I found. I tried to bypass all of it but it was difficult when it seemingly filled every single space my mind had. There was the pain from the loss of all of those whom I loved. The pain of every time someone with magic was executed. The pain of those around me berating magic and vehemently calling it evil. It was all there in my mind, clamoring me to acknowledge it; just like with the emotions of all those around me.

The thought grew to an idea within me, a plan of sorts. All I had to do now was the same thing I had done with the voices. I needed to console them, overpower them, then I would be free to continue my search. Or at least in theory I would be.

I shook the doubts away; I would find out what my mind had chosen to suppress. I took a deep breath, well, the equivalent of a deep calming breath that one can have within one's own mind. The berth succeeded in lowering the qualms I had concerning my plans, I would pass this point in myself and find what I'm looking for. With a newfound determination flowing fiercely through me I set about calming the rage of emotions trying to tear me apart and cause me to cease my search for the recent memories.

The older memories filled me with pain, but they were no match to my current state of mind. I sent out waves of consolation and love. It felt weird at first, sending out love towards myself. Yet, I knew that it was what I needed. I needed to forgive myself, something I had never really done for any of these memories; it was no wonder that these memories were so angry. They had been neglected and pushed to the back of mind without a thought of consideration for the pain. In short, I was mad at myself and now I was consoling myself; if there was ever a more strange situation I had never been in it.

The memories began to fade in their intensity. The warmth that I was filling them with finally taking effect as one by one they became just a dull forever-lasting throb in my heart. The type of throb that I would never forget but I would also be able to stand; they wouldn't attack me again. With the memories taken care of I took another deep breath inside of my mindscape and continued on with my quest.

It turns out that I needn't worry about a long tedious journey for almost instantaneously I was in front of a huge wooden door. The door was carved with numerous magical symbols; symbols I recognized from books I had read on the art of sealing. The one thing which perplexed me was how it had gotten there. Unfortunately I would have to take care of that later, currently I was consumed by the door.

It held a pull that only magical objects did. Except, this door was so much more powerful than any other object I had ever encountered. This door positively screamed its magical prowess. I was sure that if any human saw the door even they would be able to feel its magic.

My hand was now inches away from the door's handle, I hadn't even noticed that I had been moving towards it. My hand moved closer and fell upon the door.

I'm so rude; I know! How dare I end it there, but don't you worry, I already have a lot of the next chapter written . . . kind of.

Um, thanks to my beta, KeshoBesho.

Review if you feel the urge to do so.

Next on Destiny and Love:

My eyes, although open, unseeing, everything was a blur as colors played across my vision. Some of the colors were moving while others stayed in the same place that they were seemingly always in.

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I couldn't help but let a sigh escape the cavern of my mouth; the exasperation caused from all of the events which had come to life at once was getting to me.