Chapter 2: My Last Wishes

"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singing
Funny, when you're dead how people start listening."

–If I Die Young, A Band Called Perry

Elena stood in silence in the center of Stefan's large bedroom and tapped her foot nervously against the hard wood floor as she watched Stefan close the door gently behind him and finally make his way over to where she now stood. Elena studied Stefan's face, but his serious expression gave little away to what his mind truly held. His golden brown hair was messy and tangled on top of his head and his clothes fit loosely on his body due to what Elena could only imagine the torture of being under Klaus' thumb for so long had done to him. His piercing green eyes were still as beautiful as ever, but on that cool afternoon they held something she hadn't seen in quite some time…concern. Stefan had asked her to come to his room for a reason that day and in that moment Elena knew exactly what that reason truly had been; it was to save her from the person he had convinced her to fear since the moment he had arrived in their sleepy little town nearly two years before…he was there to save her from his own flesh and blood, he was there to save her from Damon.

Finally, Stefan stopped just a few feet in front of where Elena stood. He smiled as he looked at her and pushed his hands into his pockets. He let his eyes move over her body slowly as he took in the sight of the woman he had been apart from for longer than he cared to remember. Elena suddenly felt uncomfortable as she felt his eyes roam over her body, so she figured now was as good of time as any to give Stefan exactly what he needed…the truth.

"Stefan, we need to talk." Elena said quickly as she began to shift her weight between her feet nervously. Stefan nodded and then looked toward the large chairs just to the left of where they now stood.

"Yes, I have a feeling we do. Why don't you sit down, I have a funny feeling whatever you want to talk about might take a while." He said with a smile as he motioned toward one of the overstuffed leather chairs. Elena shook her head and swallowed as she straightened her stance and put on one of her most serious of expressions.

"No, I'm alright. I would really just like to get this over with." She said quickly, but the instant that the words escaped her lips Elena immediately regretted them. Her words sounded cold and as if this conversation meant nothing. She knew that the conversation meant more than any conversation they had ever had before but talking to him like this made her afraid, and that was an emotion she had just never handled well.

"Alright, so talk. You obviously have something to say to me and I am all ears." Stefan said as he leaned against one of the posts of his four poster bed and let his piercing green eyes settle just at the softness of Elena's lips.

"You know…about what I said to Damon…don't you?" Elena asked slowly as she quickly dropped her eyes to the floor. Stefan laughed low in his chest and she saw his shoes begin to move from where he stood leading him closer to her.

"Yes Elena, I know what you want. I am a vampire and these walls…well they are incredibly thin." He said with slight amusement and yet pain in his voice. Elena swallowed hard and nodded once again.

"Are you mad?" She asked as she finally raised her head and met his entrancing gaze. Stefan shrugged his shoulders and looked off toward the fire place that roared just a few feet from where they now stood. She could see the pain and anger rising within him, but as he stood looking into the fire she watched as he swallowed his feelings in pain.

"Why should I be mad, Elena? I dated you for over a year and even though you swore your love and undying devotion to me, never and I repeat never did you ever say anything about wanting to turn for me. In fact, when there was a chance you might have to turn against your will, you cried and held onto me swearing that you never wanted to become a vampire; that this life was something you never wanted. And now we find ourselves here. You are with my brother for what a week or two in the flesh and now suddenly you are willing to give up your humanity? No Elena, I am not mad…I am fucking furious!" Stefan said with an edge in his voice as his tone rose and the pain that he had been choking back began to boil over his collected exterior. Elena took a step back and swallowed hard in her throat once again. She suddenly realized that maybe this talk hadn't been such a good idea after all.

"Stefan, please calm down. I just…I didn't want it then…but now…I mean it's just…" Elena trailed off as she realized she had no words to say that would make the situation any better for either of them. She couldn't tell Stefan the real reason she wanted to turn because frankly, that would cause a fight she wasn't ready to have yet and also she couldn't lie because she knew that he would see right through it. Right now all she could do was be silent, be silent and pray this didn't get out of hand and also pray that Damon was somewhere close by just in case it did.

"I don't want to calm down Elena; I want you to give me an answer! I want you to tell me why he is better than me? Tell me why his touch is better than mine? Why there is something in his cold black heart that makes you want to give up your humanity and spend all of eternity cleaning up the bodies that he has been leaving behind since 1864!" Stefan screamed as he let out a deep breath and began to move closer to where Elena stood. Elena moved back once again as she felt the anger and rage begin to pour off of him in heated waves.

"He is not the only one that has left bodies behind Stefan and we both know that." She said softly. In that instant Stefan stopped moving. He stood in the center of the room and stared back at Elena as if he had never seen her before in his whole life. A pain washed over his face and suddenly the anger seemed to be replaced with an emotion that seemed far stronger than any that she had ever seen on his face before. He let out a sigh and then dropped his head.

"You are right. You are right and I hate that you are right, but I am trying to change Elena. I am trying to survive now without killing innocent people. Damon doesn't care and he is never going to care, is that the kind of eternity that you want? It isn't just going to be all sunshine and roses Elena. This life you are about to start is going to be bloody, tumultuous and filled with darkness you can never imagine. The hunger…it will be far stronger than anything you can ever imagine and you have to figure out how to deal with that." He said as he stared across the room and locked his gaze with her chocolate brown eyes. Elena nodded and looked back down at the floor.

"I know it is not going to be easy, but I can do this. I love him Stefan." She whispered and once again she immediately regretted the words that came out of her mouth. Never in her life did she think she would be standing in front of Stefan explaining to him that she loved his brother and that this time he was not the one that would get the girl…Damon would and she would be his forever…for eternity.

"Love isn't always enough Elena." Stefan said as he ran his fingers through his golden brown hair and closed his eyes. Elena saw the pain on his face and began to slowly move closer to him once again.

"Stefan there will always be a place for you in my heart. I will never stop loving you…its just different now." She said trying to soothe the pain that she knew her words had caused. Stefan smiled sarcastically and nodded.

"I don't want a place in your heart Elena; I want your whole heart and just remember if there is a place inside still for me, then you haven't given him your whole heart either and that is bound to come up after a couple hundred years." He said with a wicked grin. Elena felt her stomach twist and pushed back the emotions and confusion that was beginning to swim in her mind.

"I think I'd better go, Stefan." She said quickly as she began to move toward the door. In a second Stefan moved from across the room and was suddenly in front of her and blocking her path. Elena took in a deep breath and stared into the green eyes in front of her. Her body shook slightly in fear and slightly from another emotion she couldn't quite place.

"Tell me you don't still feel something for me and I will leave you alone forever, Elena." He said softly as he looked into her chocolate brown pools. Elena stared at him and swallowed as she tried to formulate a sentence that would make sense to either one of them.

"I will always feel something for you Stefan, but I will never feel for you what I feel for him…never." She whispered even though she knew it was harsh and even though she knew it was a mistake, she knew that it had to be said. For the first time in her life she needed to make a solid choice and that afternoon she finally did.

"Good-bye, Elena." Stefan said softly as he stepped to the side of the door and let her pass. Elena nodded and smiled weakly as she watched Stefan grit his teeth and try to hold back tears that Elena knew pleaded to break free.

"Good-bye, Stefan." She said quietly and then quickly moved to the door and out of his room.

The minute Elena's feet hit the other side of Stefan's doorway she found herself running as fast as she could down the long hallway that led to the staircase she yearned so longingly to reach. Once she finally reached the stairway she flew down it at nearly inhuman speed and then reached out in desperation to the front door in hopes to escape the guilt and pain that seemed to be wrapped so tightly around her heart since she had seen the tears in Stefan's perfect green eyes. Quickly, Elena pulled open the front door and began to move outside, but in a second felt her body collide with another that stopped her dead in her tracks. Elena took in a deep breath and slowed her movements as she came face to face with the caramel eyes that she had been desperately avoiding for nearly a week now.

"Bonnie." Elena said as she tried to catch her breath. Bonnie forced a smile as she held Elena's frightened gaze.

"Hi Elena…I think we need to talk." She said quickly. Elena nodded and slowly stepped back so Bonnie could move past her and step into the entryway to the Boarding House.

"Yes, I think we do. Please come in." She said and then let Bonnie move past her as she followed her into the parlor.

Both Elena and Bonnie sat in silence for what felt like an eternity as they both fumbled with their fingers in their laps nervously. Both women seemed to have so much to say, but yet everything they wanted to say seemed far too complicated for words. Finally, Bonnie looked up and locked eyes with Elena.

"I know what you asked Damon to do, Elena." She said softly. Elena nodded and then quickly dropped her gaze.

"Wow, news travels fast when there is an eavesdropping vampire in the house." She mumbled as she stared down at the rug beneath her feet. Bonnie let out an annoyed sigh.

"He isn't just an eavesdropping vampire Elena, he was your boyfriend a year ago and he is concerned about you and frankly so am I. I mean Elena what are you thinking? Are you crazy?" Bonnie asked as her voice rose slightly and she moved forward in her seat. Elena's eyes rose from the floor and looked back at Bonnie.

"So now suddenly you are all team Stefan, Bonnie? A year ago you had my back and you were on my side, what the hell happened to that?" Elena asked as she felt anger begin to rise in her veins. Bonnie sat up straighter in her chair and leaned closer to Elena's rigid frame.

"Elena it's not that I'm team Stefan, it's that I am team you and by being on your team that means protecting you from people that will hurt you and that means…" Bonnie stopped and dropped her eyes to the floor. Elena pushed herself up from her seat and stared at Bonnie.

"And that means what, Bonnie? That means keeping me away from Damon? God, why does everyone think I need to be protected from Damon?" Elena yelled as she found herself beginning to pace the floors in front of where Bonnie still sat. Finally, Bonnie let out a sigh and pushed herself from the chair she was sitting in and stood in front of Elena.

"Elena, Damon is someone you need protected from. You have seen what he is capable of…do you really want to spend eternity with him…living that way?" She asked as she tilted her head to the side and stared at Elena. Elena let out a sigh and finally let her eyes meet Bonnie's. In an instant the anger was gone and desperation seemed to flood over her beautiful features.

"He's different now Bonnie, you know that. It doesn't matter anyway…they only thing that matters is…" She started, but trailed off as she ran her fingers through her long chocolate brown hair. Bonnie stared at her.

"What, Elena? What is the only thing that matters?" She asked in confusion. Elena looked up at her friend and locked her gaze once again.

"I love him Bonnie. I love him like I've never loved anyone else before. I am not giving up the possibility of spending eternity with someone that I love like this. I want your blessing Bonnie, but no matter what you say here today, I am still going through with this." She said softly as she looked at her friend with sad eyes. Bonnie felt a pain move through her, but stood her ground as she straightened her stance and kept her eyes on Elena.

"Then I'm sorry Elena…I can't give you my blessing and I cannot help you in any way. I won't support Damon doing this to another person and ruining another life. I love you Elena, but I will be no part of this." Bonnie said and slowly began to turn and walk slowly toward the front door.

"Bonnie, please!" Elena yelled as she began to run toward her friend and wrap her arms around her shoulders and turn her around. Bonnie stared at her with tears in her eyes and shook her head as she continued to try to pull away from her.

"I can't Elena. This is not a life. I will not help him kill you, I'm sorry." She said as tears began to roll down cheeks. Elena nodded as her eyes began to fill with tears as well and watched as slowly Bonnie made her way toward the door and then finally stepped out of the door and possibly out of her life.

Elena sat in the silence of the parlor for what felt like an eternity. She sat curled up on the couch with her eyes closed thinking about the words that her and Bonnie had exchanged and the painful look on Stefan's face when she had chosen his brother over him for the first time since they had met. Tears rolled down Elena's face and then suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Elena?" Damon's velvet voice flowed into Elena's ears and immediately a small amount of the pain that was pooling inside of her began to subside. Slowly, Elena lifted her head from her knees and stared up into the bright blue eyes that seemed to always fix any pain she was feeling.

"They all hate me." Elena whispered as Damon sat down on the couch next to her. Damon let out a sigh and looked off into the distance where the fireplace roared before them.

"By they, you mean, Stefan and Bonnie, am I right?" He asked as his gritted his teeth slightly. Elena nodded as tears continued to roll down her face.

"Stefan says I am entering an eternity of darkness and Bonnie says she won't help you kill me. They don't understand…how can they not understand?" She asked as she dropped her head back down to her knees. Damon let out a ragged breath.

"Maybe they are right." He said softly. Elena's head shot up in an instant and she stared at Damon in confusion.

"Are you having second thoughts?" Elena asked as she stared at him. Damon laughed low in his chest and shook his head.

"No Elena, I am not having second thoughts. The idea of having you with me for as long as my enemies allow me to live is the greatest gift I could ever ask for. I am, however, asking you if you are having second thoughts. This is a big decision; I want you to be sure." He said as a grin spread across his beautiful face. Elena smiled; she couldn't help but smile when he grinned at her like that. He was too beautiful not to smile.

"No, I'm not. I just…I don't want people to hate me and it seems that everyone does and if I do this, it feels like I am losing a lot of people I love." She said as she laid the side of her head on her knees and stared at Damon. Damon nodded.

"They are mad right now. Stefan is mad because he always wanted you to turn for him, Bonnie is mad because…well let's face it, she fucking hates me and well everyone is just worried that you are giving up your life too fast for someone that…doesn't deserve it." He said as he suddenly looked away toward the fire. Elena stared at Damon's beautiful profile that was illuminated by the warm glow of the fireplace. Elena swallowed and suddenly pulled herself up. Slowly, she slid her hands up the sides of Damon's jaw and turned his head toward hers.

"It hurts that they feel this way Damon, but they have not changed my mind. I want to turn because I love you and if you think you don't deserve that you are crazy. You deserve far better than me, but I will give you me forever…if you want it." She whispered softly as she stared into his cobalt blue eyes. Damon smiled and looked at her in complete disbelief.

"I've wanted you since the moment I laid eyes on you, Elena. I love you…I love you more than everything and I always will." He said as he stared into her chocolate brown eyes. Elena smiled.

"I love you too and because I love you Damon I want to turn…and I want to turn tonight." She whispered softly as she stared at him. Damon felt his stilled heart nearly jump in his chest at her words. He saw the truth in her eyes and heard the desperation in her tone. Slowly, he nodded his head to clear his thoughts and swallowed thickly before he spoke.

"Then tonight it is." Damon whispered softly as he forced a smile and ran his thumb over the smoothness of Elena's full bottom lip. He tried to keep his composure, but inside he felt himself crumbling to pieces before the woman he loved. He had spent the past two years doing nothing but trying to keep Elena alive and now in one night he was going to have to undo all of the work he had done for longer than he wanted to remember. Tonight he was going to have to do the one thing that he never thought he would ever have the strength to do, but knew now that he had to do in order to have her forever. Tonight he was going to have to kill Elena Gilbert.

Please read and review. I know this chapter was possibly a bit boring but I needed it for story line. I promise that from now on there is a lot more action. I love all of you and thank you for all the amazing reviews and comments that you have all left. I am trying to get this stuff out as fast as I can but sometimes I get blocked and would rather wait than put up something icky. Anyway, thanks for reading, please click the button below and review my work. Thanks! Please forgive me for any typos, those editing eyes are tired today lol.