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"Jeanie, is the icing almost ready?" Dunkerque asked, diligently frying donuts.

"Just about," I said.

"Could you bring it over, please?" Dunkerque asked.

I set the bowl of icing on the counter next to her. She delicately ran a finger around the edge, gathering a small sample to taste.

"Hmm..." she said, smacking her lips. "Maybe a teeny bit more mint extract. Say... an eighth of a teaspoon."

I nodded, fetching the small bottle of mint extract and the one-eighth teaspoon. I carefully measured the exact amount and poured it into the bowl, mixing thoroughly.

"I thought I followed your recipe to a tee," I said.

And yes, this is Dunkerque's personal recipe for these donuts.

"Oh, it's not your fault," Dunkerque said. "I undermeasure flavorings on purpose so I can adjust as needed. Like tuning an instrument."

"Ah... that makes sense," I said, finishing mixing up the icing. "Alright, try it now."

She ran a different finger around the edge and gave it another taste test.

"Perfect!" she said. "I can handle the donuts from here. It's best to add icing when they're hot. In the meantime, would you mind preparing the tea?"

"Sure thing," I said.

I found the electric kettle and filled it with water. Meanwhile, Dunkerque fished the first batch of donuts out of the oil and onto a wire rack. A beautiful set of dark chocolatey pastries that would make anyone's mouth water.

I brough the kettle to the island counter, plugged it in, and turned it on. Now I wait.

"Thank you so much for helping," Dunkerque said. "An extra pair of hands makes everything much smoother."

She speaks as if I made a big contribution. All I did was the icing, and I just followed her recipe. She even pre-portioned some of the ingredients ahead of time and did everything else. Nevertheless, I don't mind lending a hand.

Also... I knew exactly why these donuts were being made. Or rather... whom they were for.

KNOCK KNOCK

"Hello?"

*gasp*

"Bonjour, Commander!" Dunkerque said. "You're just in time!"

...merde. Shit.

My cheeks lit on fire. He only said hello, but that's all it took to fill my stomach with butterflies. I knew he'd be coming by, and I still wasn't ready.

Meanwhile, Dunkerque gestured for the commander to come closer, smiling like nothing was wrong.

But why would she think anything's wrong? It's not like she has a huge crush on him or anything.

The commander didn't even glance at me as he walked to Dunkerque. And then they shared a hug.

I know it's only a brief hug between friends... but it still stung to watch. I could almost feel the warmth... if I pictured myself in Dunkerque's place...

...what the... ugh! These stupid, mushy thoughts! He always does this to me! Why the hell would he hug me anyway? That'd be... weird.

...hngh... why did that thought feel like sucker punch to my heart?

Suddenly, the kettle whistled sharply, and I flinched.

Oh right. The tea.

I turned off the kettle and took it off the base, and the whistling stopped.

Keep it together. I can't let him distract me. Focus on the tea. That's my only job right now. Tea. Not the commander.

I picked up the teabag Dunkerque set out beforehand and steeped it in the kettle. And now I have to wait again... only this time with the commander in the room.

It took zero seconds for me to start stealing glances at him. He was talking to Dunkerque about something... with that smooth, buttery voice...

"It'll only be another minute," Dunkerque said. "Have a seat and make yourself comfortable."

I froze. I knew there were only three barstools in here, all on the other side of the counter. The first was closer to Dunkerque. The second was about equidistance from both of us. The last one, the furthest from him, was right across from me.

Which one will he choose? Surely, he'd wanna be closer to Dunkerque, right?

But he walked right past the first stool.

Okay... the second one, I guess?

Nope. Walked right by it. Which means...

...oh no.

He stopped at the final stool, and my fear was realized. He casually took a seat, seemingly oblivious that I was freaking out.

"Hello, Jean Bart."

Guh!

I flinched. His heart-throbbing voice hit me like a gust of wind.

"Um... b-bonjour, Commander," I said, tucking my hair behind my ear. "Heh..."

He nodded with that damn smile, and those perfect eyes.

Damn it... my cheeks are on fire.

Silence fell between us. My body felt like stone, with lava coursing through my veins.

This is awkward, right? Definitely. Maybe? Is it just me? He doesn't look bothered.

I stole a glance at Dunkerque. She was nonchalantly dipping each donut into the icing while humming to herself, as if all was well.

Of all the damn barstools, why did he pick the one furthest from him and also right in front of me? It makes no sense, unless... he wants to talk to me?

No... no way. He's here for Dunkerque, right? He wouldn't care about me. Or... maybe he would? This could be my chance!

...but what do I say? What would he wanna talk about? Should I just take a shot in the dark? What if he thinks I'm stupid? What if—?

"Giving Dunkerque a hand, Jean Bart?"

"Huh?"

I flinched, like a fuse just popped in my brain.

Oh... he does wanna talk to me?

Shoot, how much am I blushing? It feels like my face is burning. I'm not used to him being this close.

Well? Answer him, then! Don't just stare.

"Uh... y-yeah," I said, fidgeting with my hair. "Always happy to help a friend."

"You can thank her for this delicious icing," Dunkerque interjected, sampling it again. "Mmm... marvelous work."

"I only followed your recipe," I said. "You did everything else."

"Oh, give yourself more credit," Dunkerque said. "You helped make things quick and efficient, so you have my thanks, Jeanie."

Ack! Dunkerque! D-Don't call me that in front of him! I'm already blushing enough!

...ergh... but I ain't about to call her out. It wouldn't be fair.

"Is the tea almost ready?" Dunkerque asked.

Tea?

Oh crap, the tea! I almost forgot! How long has it been steeping? Damn it, Commander, I can't concentrate when you're around!

Calm down. Just get some cups out and pour the tea. It's probably fine.

I turned to grab some teacups from the cupboard, but my nerves turned my limbs into lead. It was a struggle to just lift my feet, knowing the commander might be looking at me. My joints felt like rubbing metal.

Just walk, Jean!

One grueling, friction-ridden journey across the kitchen floor later, I managed to retrieve three teacups from the cupboard. I turned around... and the commander was looking at Dunkerque.

Go figure. I was worried about nothing.

My return journey to the counter was much less rigorous.

I set the teacups down and picked up the kettle, preparing to pour... until I caught the commander in my peripheral vision. My arms turned to lead again, and the kettle shook in my hand.

Jean... focus. Pour the damn tea.

I took a deep breath, gingerly tipping the kettle's spout over the first teacup. Wisps of steam billowed from the tip as a glossy, auburn liquid poured out. I watched closely, stopping when the liquid was about a finger's width from the top.

Hmm... it looks alright. The color's familiar. Maybe I should taste it to make sure?

Wait... I can't do that in front of the commander. He'll think I'm serving myself first. How selfish would that look? I can't ask Dunkerque either. She'll know right away if I messed up. Then he'll wonder why we gotta make another batch of tea! "Oh, does Jean Bart's tea suck? That's okay. I'll drink anything you brew, Dunkerque."

Ergh... c'mon... don't be like that. Just give him the tea... and cross your fingers.

"H-Here ya go, Commander," I said, gently sliding the teacup over to him.

I held my breath as I watched the tea rock back and forth, nearing the rim. To my relief, nothing spilled.

"Thank you," he said.

Damn... just hearing him thank me made my heart spark.

"N-No prob," I said, fidgeting with my hair. "Hope ya like it."

My palms started sweating as he gently blew on the surface of the tea and took a sip.

...what if he doesn't like it? What if he spits it out in disgust? He's probably got a refined palate for tea from being around the Royal Navy so much. He'd probably like a girl who's good at making it, right? What if I ain't that girl? What if he hates it so much that—?

"Mm!" he said with a glimmering smile. "This is delicious! What kind is it?"

Huh? He likes it? Oh thank God.

"G-Glad ya like it," I said. "It's just what Dunkerque set out ahead of time. Iris-style."

"I don't think I've had it before," he said. "Come to think of it, I haven't sampled many Iris teas. I'll have to try more sometime. Thanks again."

I blushed. "Sure thing."

Once again, I had nothing to worry about.

Ugh... stop freaking out. Maybe drinking some tea myself will calm me down.

I filled the last two teacups, keeping one for myself and sliding the other over to Dunkerque. I took a sip—

"Mmf!"

Hot! Hot!

I clenched my fist, almost spitting the tea out as my mouth was boiled.

Holy shit! Why is it so fucking hot?!

I was forced to swallow it just to stop my mouth from being seared like a steak. It oozed down my throat like lava, before the scorching heat finally subsided.

"Jeanie? Are you okay?" Dunkerque asked.

No, don't draw attention to me! He might...

...shoot. He's already looking at me. Ugh... who am I kidding? He saw everything, didn't he?

"I... uh... forgot to blow on it," I said.

"I see," Dunkerque said. "Don't burn yourself, okay?"

I nodded, pursing my lips and leaning my head down. I can't let him see how red my face is.

Can I go for one second without embarrassing myself? Is that too much to ask?

"Tada!" Dunkerque announced with vibrato in her voice.

She set down a huge platter of chocolatey donuts, each topped with a smooth ring of white icing. The icing itself slightly dripped down the sides like frozen water droplets on a tree branch.

"We made your favorite," Dunkerque said. "Chocolate donuts with mint icing. Bon Appétit!"

Without hesitation, the commander grabbed one and took a bite.

"Mmm..." he groaned, grinning wide. "These are amazing. Thank you so much."

"My pleasure!" Dunkerque said. "A parting gift for my last day as secretary, and for being so good to me."

She reached for a donut herself and took a bite.

"Oh my... these came out wonderfully," Dunkerque said. "Help yourself, Jeanie."

I nodded and reached for the platter, but my body felt like lead again. I could feel my back and joints creak with the slightest movements.

For God's sake, I'm just reaching for something! Why does everything have to be a chore when the commander's around? And why did Dunkerque place them so far from me? Or do they just seem far to my stressed mind?

After a weird look from Dunkerque, she slid the platter closer and met me halfway.

I guess she noticed me struggling. I tried to give a casual nod as I took a donut and leaned back. I was about to take a bite, but not before I stole another glance at the commander...

...ah! He looked at me!

I darted my eyes away, blushing profusely.

Was he looking at me already? Did we look at the same time? Hmph... whatever. Just eat the donut.

I took a bite. Mmm... damn that's good. Even with my tongue singed from the hot tea, it was delicious. A rich, soft, chocolatey cake with decadent vanilla icing, and a slight nip of mint, all swirling together and melting in my mouth. Just the thing to help me calm down.

"So, Commander," Dunkerque said. "I don't think you've told me who your next secretary is."

I perked up.

Some gossip? Yeah, Commander. Who's your next secretary?

"I'm not sure, actually," he said. "I forgot to make a new roster for the next secretary rotation. I have some ideas, and was gonna sleep on it since we have the day off tomorrow."

Am I one of those ideas, Commander? I'll be your right-hand girl! I'll...

...tch. C'mon. How many other ships are there? What are the odds that I get picked?

"That's a good idea," Dunkerque said. "I'm sure going to miss the job myself, but I'm glad we could grow close."

"Me too," he said with a smile.

"And now I'm more familiar with your food preferences," she said.

"I'll say," he said. "These donuts keep getting better the more you make them."

"Merci!" she said. "I can see why they're your favorite. Chocolate and mint are the perfect combination. Since you like my baking so much, what other desserts do you fancy? I can make anything you want."

"Like... anything anything?" he asked.

She giggled. "Within reason, of course, but I'm willing to learn beyond my usual arsenal of recipes. Tell me what you like, and I'll make it work."

Their conversation went back and forth, discussing different desserts and whatnot. Meanwhile, I just stood awkwardly by the counter and listened, munching on a donut and sipping tea.

How does Dunkerque talk to him so easily? They seem so content with each other's company. I feel like I could leave right now, and they wouldn't notice.

Is this what "third-wheeling" is?

"...what about you, Jeanie?"

"Huh?"

Wait... me?! I thought they were gonna keep to themselves!

"Um... sorry," I said. "Wh-What was the question?"

They both gave me weird looks.

"I asked if you're looking forward to the weekend," she said. "Did you space out?"

"Uh... I-I guess?" I said. "But yeah, I'm looking forward to it."

Their weird looks didn't go away.

"You look awfully tense," Dunkerque said. "Is everything alright?"

Is it that noticeable?

"Yeah... I'm fine," I insisted. "Just a lot on my mind."

To my surprise, the commander spoke up.

"Anything you want to talk about?" he asked.

In front of you? Hell no! This is all your damn fault!

Our eyes locked. Any inkling of a coherent sentence was gone in a poof. Once again, I was stone.

Ergh! Why do his stupid eyes leave me helpless? His stupid... big... lustrous eyes... staring right at me... analyzing every detail of me...

"Um... I-I think I should go!" I blurted, loudly enough that they both flinched.

"What?" Dunkerque asked. "Is something wrong?"

Yeah, my heart's burning to a crisp, that's what!

"I-I just don't wanna be a third wheel," I said. "I came to help, and I did. I'll head out so you two can chat in peace."

Dunkerque looked at me like I was crazy. "Don't be silly. You're more than welcome to stay. If we needed privacy, we would've said so."

The air was heavy. They both just stared, waiting for me to speak. If I didn't have to leave before, I do now. I've made this too awkward to salvage, and with the commander here it'll only get worse.

"I-I'd rather just go," I said. "The commander's here for you, not me."

Their eyes widened. My words cut through the air like a knife. Now that I said it out loud, it sounded much harsher than I meant. But... it's true, isn't it?

"Well... alright then," Dunkerque said. "I guess I won't keep you. But you can talk to me if something's wrong, okay? Here, have another donut for the road."

She grabbed a napkin, using to retrieve a donut, and handed it to me.

Ugh... I feel like I just dropped a bomb on their afternoon. All the more reason for me to leave and take the awkwardness with me.

"Merci," I said, accepting the donut. "I'll see ya 'round."

"Au revoir," Dunkerque said, giving me a quick hug goodbye. My friends never let me leave without one. The commander offered a simple wave. I barely managed to wave back, practically flicking the air with my wrist, before getting the hell outta there.

Walking out the door, it felt like the haze cleared from my mind, released from whatever spell the commander cast on me. But that haze was soon replaced by chilling dread as I walked down the hall. I kept going until they were out of earshot, and the coast was clear. I found the nearest wall and let my forehead fall against it. I let out a long sigh though my teeth, balling my free hand into a fist.

What the hell was that?

The commander's here for you, not me.

Ugh... what a selfish thing to say.

My mind flashed images of what just happened as if to reprimand me. My cheeks were as hot as the tea that scorched my mouth. Thank God nobody was in the hall to see me like this.

I need some alone time to let this humiliation drain away. And I know the perfect place. Somewhere even my friends wouldn't think to look.

Following a scarcely defined dirt path through the trees and brush, I emerged onto a little sandbar in the side of a small bay connected to the sea itself.

Ah... finally. Solitude.

The fiery sunset sky against the ocean horizon greeted my eyes. Sparkling waves tumbled into the bay, whisking sea spray into the air. I took a sniff.

Mmm... salty and rich. It's like the world's welcoming me back to my hideaway.

I stumbled upon this place a while back, and as cheesy as it sounds, it felt like fate had led me here. Wedged in the sandbar was a respectable structure made of faded-brown wood planks. It resembled the wreckage of an old pirate ship. Its crew must've met a terrible fate, but the ship itself remained remarkably sturdy, even having some of the railing and flooring intact. And in such a beautiful bay, it was too perfect not to take advantage of. After a rigorous cleaning, I turned it into a proper hideout. I snuck a pool umbrella down here for shade, and even a hammock. Yes, the structure was strong enough to support a hammock with me in it.

I ended up coming back so much that I began storing other belongings: a surfboard, a cooler, and a medium-sized chest to store a swimsuit, some swim gear, towels, and a fresh-change of clothes. It really turned into a home away from home where I can relax alone.

Speaking of which...

I went to the chest to grab my swimsuit—a black string bikini with shorts. I ain't gonna swim today, but I love wearing it while I'm here. There's nothing quite like the sea breeze on my bare skin.

I did a quick scan to make sure nobody was peeping. Nobody should be here anyway, but I can't be too sure.

Hm... looks clear.

Quickly, I changed, throwing my usual clothes on top of the chest. The soft sand felt nice on my feet as I adjusted my top. Once I was comfortable, I climbed into the hammock.

Ahhh... now this is more like it. Feels like I'm being cradled by the sea breeze itself.

I turned my head to the bay's opening, and I was in awe. That's nothing new around here, though. It never ceases to amaze me just how beautiful this place is, especially at dusk. The setting sun filled the sea with gold and the sky was ablaze with milky red, orange, and purple halos and clouds like soft pink and purple fluff.

Dusk isn't the only time of day with stunning vistas. By day, I'm treated to soft, wispy clouds rolling over distant mountains and crystal blue waters sparkling like glitter. By night, the sea turns to silver, and the water, sand, and foliage glow with the ethereal starlight.

Beautiful... and peaceful too. Barely a hint of wildlife besides crickets and fireflies at night. Not even the waters had signs of bothersome creatures. The surrounding foliage was not only nice to look at, but also kept the bay well-concealed from riffraff. It's true privacy. I can do whatever I want, free from judging eyes. Best of all, it's within walking distance of port.

It's my own slice of paradise... and I intend to keep it that way. I'll be damned if others catch wind of this place, and it becomes a playground overnight. Call me greedy, but I don't wanna share something so precious. Not even with my friends. I love them, but sometimes I need to escape it all... like now.

Dunkerque... Commander...

The images of them staring at me were vivid.

Why did I forget how to be normal? I guess ya usually don't have to think about that, but when the commander's around I don't know what to do. I forget how to speak, and my thoughts become so mushy... like the stupid phrases you'd find on one of those chalky valentine's day candy hearts.

One would think the flagship of the Vichya Dominion would be more hardened than this. Jean Bart, the mightiest of the Templar Knights, the Vichya Dominion's last cutting-edge battleship, wouldn't fall for someone so easily. Her heart would be earned, not stolen.

...but no. The commander shattered all of that with a look. He pierced my heart with an arrow laced with... feelings. Even now, all I can think about is him. Being around him makes my heart palpitate so hard, it feels like it's gonna punch out of my body.

I don't know what to do. Worst of all, I can't ask for help. If anyone finds out, I'll be a laughingstock. He'll be creeped out and never wanna talk to me again! Argh! It's so frustrating...!

No... calm down. I came here to relax, not beat myself up.

I took a deep breath and let my body relax...

*gasp*

What the—?!

Oh... jeez. It felt like I was falling for a second. Was I so tense that simply relaxing felt like falling?

Hngh... why do I feel chilly? I'm usually fine in my swimsuit, even when it's a bit windy. And it's the middle of summer. Maybe it's the lingering thought of Dunkerque and the commander hugging?

My heart feels cold... like it's yearning for something... or someone... to keep it warm. Perhaps with a hug?

I sighed. I bet it's really warm in his arms...

Ugh... God! What am I thinking?! I don't need a damn hug from him! Ya wanna hug me? Ya gotta earn it!

And yet... just thinking about how warm it must be in his arms... gives me goosebumps.

Hmph... I guess Dunkerque's just braver than me. I may be a flagship, but when the commander's around, I crumble. I wonder if the commander likes Dunkerque the same way I like him. What's not to love about her? She's sweet, charming, beautiful... everything I'm not. Sweet, caring Dunkerque instead of... cold-hearted, selfish Jean Bart...

No... don't be jealous. Jealousy's poison. Last time I got too jealous, I... I...

"Augh!"

I yelped. Flashbacks shot through my head like bullets.

"Shit... n-no... no no no... stop! Stop!"

No use. I was already falling.

My ears rang. I grasped the sides of my head. It all suddenly came back to me. A grand city burning to ash, filling the air with choking smoke. Casablanca. A crippled, unfinished battleship, helpless and immobilized. Me. And the battleship's superior elder sister, gazing down with cold, disappointed eyes. The golden-haired Cardinal... Richelieu.

As of now, the Vichya Dominion has been dissolved.

Don't do anything that will tarnish your noble name...

"Shut up! Stop! Stop!"

Apathetic to my protesting, the images and voices continued their onslaught.

Hngh... I... my chest feels like... it's caving in...!

No! Calm down. Calm down! Just focus on what's around you. The shimmering waters... the brilliant sky... the wispy clouds... the gentle sea air... the cozy, comfortable hammock... the safety of the hideaway... I'm safe... I'm safe...

...

...ergh!

It's not working. The sounds won't stop. That Eagle Union battleship... about to take another shot...

Maybe... music? Yeah. Yeah, music oughta help. Quickly...

My limbs felt like bending metal, but I managed to grab my phone and earbuds. I hastily put my earbuds in and went to my playlist of easy, relaxing music. My hands were shaking as I desperately and aimlessly tapped the screen until the first note of any song hit my ears.

C'mon, Jean Bart. Concentrate. Be strong.

With some deep breathing, I focused on the gentle beats.

I'm safe... I'm safe... I'm safe...

With one last repeat of that mantra, I sank into my hammock with a sigh.

Finally... it's stopping.

Ugh... ain't the first time that's happened. When I wanted to relax, this ain't what I had in mind. Why can't I just forget? Apparently, God won't let me. Maybe it's just my punishment.

Thank goodness nobody was around to see that. Especially the commander.

I need a nap. That'll clear my head.

I adjusted myself in the hammock and closed my eyes. I kept my music on as a shield from any rogue flashbacks. I could still hear the waves rolling across the bay, and in my mind, I could see them. Gentle waves pushing and pulling on the shore sands in perfect time with the beat. Pushing and pulling. Pushing... and pulling. Pushing... and...

"Mm...?"

I yawned, roused by the sea breeze.

Oh... I dozed off. Just like I wanted.

I rubbed my eyes before they fluttered open. I stretched, grunted loudly as blood rushed through my muscles, before collapsing back into the sweet embrace of the hammock.

I took a deep breath.

Ah... my head is much clearer now.

Wait... is that music?

Oh, that's right. I was listening to music before I fell asleep.

I paused the music and took my earbuds out. My ears were treated to a cacophonous symphony of crickets. As my vision came into focus, I could make out the occasional glint of a firefly in the nearby foliage. The waters of the bay were glowing with silver, and barely a hint of orange sunlight peeked over the horizon. All of which means it's nighttime. And that means the stars are out!

I peeked out from the pool umbrella and was in awe again. There was the night sky greeting me in all its glory. Not a single artificial light was around to inhibit the its true majesty. Millions of twinkling stars and astral bodies were scattered in a sea of endless celestial beauty beyond comprehension. And the cherry on top was the elusive dusty ring of the galaxy coloring the sky. The natural starlight made the bay glow like something out of a fantasy. Hard to believe that a place this beautiful was real and right in front of me.

I'd love to stay and stargaze, but I've been here for a hot minute. My friends will worry if I'm gone for too long, especially at night.

I carefully got outta the hammock, stretching one more time before getting my clothes. I changed back into my normal attire and fixed my ponytail before starting my short trek back to the dorms.

As I neared port, the increasing artificial light caused the band of the galaxy to fade. A few steps later, stars began fading too. Once I reached the main walkways, the galaxy's band was gone and only a few stars remained. It's a shame, but I know a breathtaking night sky is always waiting for me at my hideaway.

Following the walkways, I looked around. Plenty of ships were still out and about, enjoying the evening.

I wonder what the commander's doing right now?

OOF!

Ow! Damn it. Who'd I bump into?

"My bad," I said. "I wasn't paying attention."

"Jean Bart?"

My heart stopped. I'd know that voice anywhere. That smooth... masculine voice.

I looked...

"C-Commander?!"

Merde!

It felt like a hot branding iron had been shoved against my chest.

He's... right in front of me!

"Um...! B-Bonjour!" I said. "Wh-are you doing here?!"

Huh?! What kinda question is that? What's anyone doing out here?!

"Just out for a walk," he said calmly. "It's a nice evening for it."

An obvious answer to a dumb question.

"What about you?" he asked.

"Me?" I said. "Oh, y'know... just enjoying the evening... like you."

Oh shoot, I'm playing with my hair. Why do I always do that when I'm nervous?

"Uh... sorry for bumping into you," I said. "You alright?"

"Yeah," he said, smoothing out his uniform. "It happens, don't worry."

Shoot... I didn't think I'd have to face him today after what I did with him and Dunkerque earlier.

Although, he hasn't mentioned it yet. Maybe he won't bring it up? Regardless... it's awkward.

"Hey, I'm actually glad we ran into each other," he said. "I need to talk to you."

Talk? To me?

"Um... sure," I said. "What's up?"

"Well... earlier with Dunkerque..."

Damn it. I should've known.

"Did I say something to upset you?" he asked. "You left really suddenly, and you kinda glared at me on the way out."

I did? I wasn't trying to, I swear!

"I was a little bummed out," he said. "When I saw you there, I was looking forward to talking to you."

What?! Are you kidding me?! I freaked out over nothing?!

"I just wanted to make sure it wasn't something I did," he said.

Hmph... wouldn't you like to know, hotshot?

Crap... what do I say? I can't just walk away, but I also can't say that he was the one giving me butterflies. I'm trapped! My heart's gonna burn me from the inside!

Wait... no! This is not me being trapped. It's another opportunity to talk to him, and I ain't gonna blow it this time! I'm strong! I'm Jean Bart, damn it!

Speak calmly and concisely. Deep breath...

"...it wasn't you," I said. "Nor was it Dunkerque. My job was done, so I figured I shouldn't get in the way. Simple as that."

Yeah... I'll stick with that. It sounds more reasonable than... the truth.

"Although, I could've put it less selfishly," I said. "So sorry about that."

"Oh, I didn't get that vibe," he said. "I was just worried you were mad at me. I promise you weren't in the way. You can be honest if it's something I did."

Hngh... no I can't, Commander. I seriously can't.

"Just... a lot on my mind, that's all," I said. "Personal stuff that I'd rather not get into."

Please don't ask more questions, Commander. I know you're curious, but you can't know.

Luckily, he shrugged.

"Alright, fair enough," he said. "I won't press you."

Phew.

"I'm glad you're not mad at me," he said. "Because I had a follow-up question."

"Oh?" I said. "What is it?"

"Well, I'm just gonna go ahead and ask it," he said. "Jean Bart, would you like to be my next secretary?"

*gasp*

...did I hear that right?

"S-Secretary...?" I asked. "Me?"

"Yep," he said. "The position's yours if you want it."

Oh... my god...

Suddenly my heart was floating. A tingly feeling radiated from my chest, rippling through my entire body.

Of all the ships, he chose me?

"Uh... can I ask why?" I asked. "And for that matter, why don't you need Dunkerque anymore? I'm sure she was great."

"She was," he admitted. "It's nothing personal. There's a secretary rotation to prevent burnout. Dunkerque was just the last one on the previous roster and I forgot to make a new one. So instead, I asked Dunkerque for recommendations, and she referred me to you."

Dunkerque, huh? I should've guessed.

Am I still asleep? This is too good to be true.

Stay cool, Jean. And don't smile too much.

"Hmph... sounds to me like an excuse to meet girls," I remarked, folding my arms and trying to smirk instead of full-on smile.

He gave me a weird look. "Well... if you don't want the position, you don't have to take it."

"What?!" I said. "Hold on! I never said I wouldn't!"

God damn it, it was just a joke! Don't you dare blow this, Jean!

"Are you sure?" he asked. "I don't want to force you."

"You ain't forcing anyone!" I said. "I accept! And I'll be the best damn secretary you've ever had!"

I straightened myself out, put my hands on my hips, stood firm, and looked right at him. Feeling the breeze flow through my hair, I channeled all the energy inside me into the most confident smirk I could muster.

This is the real me, Commander! Strong, assertive, and unafraid! Not that meek Jean Bart ya saw earlier today. Your good looks ain't gonna win this time!

His eyes were wide. I stood firm as he looked me over... which made me blush a little... but I remained unfazed. I think it worked, because I was rewarded with an approving smile.

"Impressive," he said. "I look forward to Monday. See you then, and have a good evening."

I give him a firm nod, maintaining my stance.

"Merci, Commander. You too."

He turned away and started walking. I turned the opposite way, and as soon as I did, my stance faltered.

Shoot... I'm about to smile. I can't let that happen out in the open... but I feel so tingly...

With a half-smile already on my face, already losing this battle, I frantically searched for any area around me that could offer privacy. I spotted a big tree casting a shadow away from the walkway and the streetlamps. That'll do.

I rushed over, leaning against the trunk. With three-quarters of a smile, I checked to make sure nobody was nearby.

...all clear.

And then, the visceral joy I'd been suppressing all this time burst through like a damn... and I broke into a full, beaming smile. My body was overtaken by warmth reminiscent of Dunkerque's freshly baked treats, and in a "hushed" voice...

"...YES!"

I pumped my fists, even bouncing on my toes.

I'm just so... AHHH!

I thought it'd be a miracle if he ever spoke to me again, but this?!

Hah... okay... let's take it down a notch. Might draw some unwanted attention.

I took some deep breaths. The bubbliness inside me settled, but I still had the giddiest smile on my face.

I slumped back on the tree, tuckered from my little outburst. The image of the commander's smile kept my heart warm like a hearth. I gotta thank Dunkerque for the recommendation. I probably wouldn't have been chosen without her.

"Jeanie? Is that you?"

Speaking of whom...

I looked beside me to see Dunkerque approaching, smiling. She was holding a couple bottles of wine and some paper cups.

"Bonsoir, Dunkerque," I said.

"Bonsoir!" Dunkerque said. "What brings you out here?"

"Just... enjoying the evening," I said.

That sounds reasonable. I can't say that I've been in my hideaway.

"Oh? What's this?" Dunkerque asked, smirking and leaning in. "Do I see a hint of a smile on your face?"

I guess I'm not hiding it that well.

"Um... maybe," I said, turning away.

"Ooh!" Dunkerque swooned. "It's not every day that I see your beautiful smile."

Hmph... more like "embarrassing" smile. To me, at least.

"Something good must've happened," Dunkerque said. "Would you mind enlightening me?"

My smile got bigger. I couldn't stop it.

"Well, I ran into the commander a minute ago," I said, smirking. "And now, you're looking at the new secretary ship. That's what."

Dunkerque gasped. "Ahh! Congratulations!"

She gave me the best hug she could while holding two fragile wine bottles.

"Well, I should be thanking you for recommending me," I said.

"Ah, did he tell you?" Dunkerque said. "I have no doubt you'll be an amazing secretary."

I nodded. "Merci."

Dunkerque smiled. "You have no idea how relieved I am to see you smile. I was so worried when you left earlier."

"Oh... ya mean in the kitchen?" I asked.

"Yes," Dunkerque said. "I didn't mean to make you feel unwelcome. I'm sorry."

"No, I should apologize," I said. "Neither of you did anything wrong, and it was selfish to make you think otherwise."

"Aw, I didn't feel that way," Dunkerque said. "Well... perhaps we both carry blame. If it'll ease your mind, I forgive you."

I smirked. "And I forgive you too."

She giggled. "A little weight of our shoulders, hm? But don't forget, if you're troubled by something, I'm here for you."

I nodded. "Thanks. And same for you."

"Merci," Dunkerque said. "On a lighter note, would you like to accompany me?"

She showed off the wine bottles in her hand, smiling eagerly.

"I was gonna ask what those was for," I asked. "Accompany you to what?"

"I'm meeting Richelieu and Algerie at the gazebo by the beach," Dunkerque said. "We can have a little makeshift celebration."

"Oh... um... I dunno," I said. "Impromptu social gatherings aren't really my thing."

"Well, we were going to invite you beforehand, but we couldn't find you," Dunkerque said.

Must've been in my hideaway at the time.

"Richelieu especially wanted you to come," Dunkerque said.

"...really?" I asked.

"Mmhmm," Dunkerque said, speaking gingerly. "Please, Jeanie? They'd be thrilled to see you. Besides, you can't go wrong with some drinks and girl-time, right?"

Hmm... well... that does sound nice... and I'd hate to disappoint them...

"...eh, why not? I'm in a good mood," I said. "Lemme carry one of those bottles for ya."

Dunkerque beamed, handing me one of the bottles and leading me to the others.

What a roller coaster of a day. And now I get to be excited about being the commander's right-hand girl! I'll be the closest ship to him for the foreseeable future!

I'll be... the closest ship to him. We'll be together... for hours a day... alone...

Hngh... I gave myself butterflies. Knowing how I behaved today with him so close to me... will I be able to handle being alone with him? I can put on a confident, fearless façade for a few minutes, but every day? For hours?

How long can I keep up this façade?

A/N: Man, this is hard. Jean Bart is such an interesting character, but having her in such an unlikely situation is difficult. Was fun, though.

But onto more business-related things... I know plenty of you are concerned about my currently active fics, mainly My Shining Starlight and Loveliest of Trees. Those have not been abandoned, I promise. But when I have a spark of inspiration, I act on it, and everything else gets pushed out. My mind is very sporadic, and I just do whatever I feel like. The main issue with My Shining Starlight in particular is that I'm not sure what to do without regurgitating the US/UM dialogue, and I have some good stuff planned but I need to figure out how to get there in an interesting way. As for Loveliest of Trees, I just don't have the motivation. If you could see from this story, I'm trying to go for something different to challenge myself, and because Jean Bart is such an interesting character that I believe I could have fun with. If I'm not motivated, I won't do a good job, because I'll want to get it done so I can back to the things I am motivated for. I don't want to do that to those who are very excited to see where the stories will go next.

Just some updates for you guys in the interest of transparency. Rest assured that those stories have not been abandoned, and I will work on them until they are finished. Until then, have a good one.