((Yup, Sammy's next. I don't think I've ever written for him... but yeah... I'm sorry in advance for the extra Cas!whump. He'll be awake for the next one... I think... ^^)
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It is so quiet. From what Bobby tells me, that alone is a small miracle. I've been sitting here for hours- the only way we could convince Dean to finally get some sleep was to set up some sort of shift schedule. That way, Cas would never be alone, when the time comes.
Dean still refuses to see it. He refuses to see the stillness that had taken hold of his angel. To see the shuddering breaths that wracked his body, the vessel. I can't help but wonder, why didn't he leave Jimmy's body, at the very least his death wouldn't be wracked with human frailty. I frown, watching his expression tighten and a thought strikes me. Perhaps he can't.
I know the truth, I was prepared for it the instant that I drove that blade into his back. Castiel, as we knew him, was gone. And I knew what I had to do. Dean would hate me, in fact, there's a good chance that he would never forgive me, but I knew what I had to do.
Cas' body jolts suddenly, effectively pulling me out of my thoughts. I feel a trill of fear shoot down my spine.
Now?
I grab his hand as a harsh cry rips out of his body. I can't risk going and getting Dean or Bobby and him dying alone. The thought of that would kill Dean. So the Angel of Thursday will have to die with no one but the man who tried to kill him for company.
I try not to think about the weight of what is happening. That a being older than I can comprehend was dying on a ratty old mattress in the house of a junk man in South Dakota. It felt so… wrong. To let a warrior of God die so broken and alone.
I close my eyes, hearing the rattling gasps that are coming from Dean's guardian angel, and wishing I couldn't. I don't want to be here. I don't want to be the one to watch him die. I may have tried to kill him, but I don't want to let him die.
I grip his hand tighter. "Don't you dare die, Castiel."