Disclaimer: Bones and its affiliated characters do not belong to me. I mean no copyright infringement.
In the Beginning: A collection of short one-shots of Booth & Brennan learning to live together. They are in no particular order. Please let me know what you think!
One-Shot #2 – Bones, what the hell?
Author's Note: Okay, this one is rather… strange. I just couldn't help it. The muse goes where the muse goes.
"Bones, what the hell do you think you're doing?"
"What does it look like I'm doing, Booth? I'm going to brush my teeth."
"Now?" he asked incredulously. "I'm trying to take a shit. It's not like I'm masturbating in here."
She set her toothbrush down before applying the toothpaste, walked over and stopped right in front of him. "I would hope not. I would like to be invited for that."
"You are amazingly weird. Who walks up to someone trying to take a dump?" he said as he was forced to put down his graphic novel to accommodate her presence. "This isn't helping. Go." He smacked her on the rear.
"Fine. I'll be quick about it." She resumed her task and Booth laid his head in the palm of his hands shaking it lightly. She quickly finished and was about to leave the bathroom when she turned around. "I can grab your beer hat if you'd like," she said seriously.
"Bones! I'm not soaking in a tub!"
"Maybe you should start eating healthier. Fruits and vegetables would help your bowel movements tremendously."
"You want to talk about this now?" He half snorted and half chuckled. "You've made me eat enough rabbit food since moving in and I eat fruit… apple pie, cherry pie…"
She rolled her eyes.
"Temperance," he whined.
One of her eyebrows went up. "First name, Seeley? You definitely would prefer masturbating right now."
"Oh, for crying out loud!"
"No one's crying, Booth."
He glared at her.
"I'm going. I'm going. Don't forget to put the cover down before you flush. I don't want germs all over our toothbrushes." She left as quietly as she came in.
"Unfucking believable," he muttered to himself.