Hello folks!

A great big thank you to Laine3112 for her help with this chapter. I know that she will probably argue that it wasn't much, because that's just who she is. But her tweaks, as well as the additions to the dialogue between Tony and Gibbs helped me get through some nagging self-doubts about where it was going. Without her help I would probably still be slogging away at it and growling at my computer screen for who knows how many more days. You have her to thank for this fairly timely update (at least compared to my last, LOL).

Enjoy!

-Moki

Chapter Thirteen

"Because I will not allow myself to think any other way."

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After thirty minutes of doing anything he could think of to keep his hands busy, Gibbs had to force himself to sit down again in front of the fire. Sitting for a few minutes after he'd gotten Tony settled had caused stray thoughts to work their way into his head and, in an attempt to keep them at bay, he had jumped up and gone to their saddle bags. Unpacking their clothes and sleeping gear, Gibbs had spread everything out on the rocks near the fire. Within a few hours something should be dry enough to wrap around Tony, as Gibbs couldn't help but to notice how the other man shivered even in his sleep.

Once he'd laid out everything on the rocks, Gibbs had gone back to look through their other supplies. There were a few packets of camp food as well as two full canteens full of water. He doubted Tony would want to eat anytime soon and water was nothing if not plentiful so he knew he didn't need to worry about sustenance. Surely, they'd be rescued well before either became a problem.

So now he sat, with nothing else to do to keep his hands or his mind busy. He watched the fire, stealing glances at the man sleeping on the other side of it.

"You know Boss, you keep staring at me like that and…." Tony paused to cough lightly. "I'm gonna start to think your interest is a little Brokeback Mountain."

Gibbs' lips twisted in a small grin, he hadn't realized Tony was awake. One of these days he was going to have to ask Tony how he always knew when Gibbs' eyes were on him, even when his own were closed or his back was turned.

"You should be resting."

Sensing the team leader's unspoken worry, Tony wrapped his arms tighter around his body and rolled onto his side to face his boss. The older man's body language was relaxed and casual but the blue eyes spoke of concern and a rare feeling of helplessness. Hating that he was the cause of that worry, Tony immediately defaulted to humor, trying to ease his partner's concern with the normality of their banter.

"Tried to sleep, can't."

"Try harder."

"It doesn't work like that, Boss! Even you can't just order somebody to sleep."

"Ordered you not to die once…worked then," Gibbs shrugged.

"Yeah, well, I was a little more motivated then. I wasn't thrilled with the alternative."

A few moments of silence followed and just as Gibbs thought Tony had drifted off, the younger man spoke again.

"You know, Boss, when I was a kid and I was sick or I couldn't sleep, my Mom would sing to me."

"You suggesting I sing you a lullaby, DiNozzo?"

"Under the circumstances, I think that would be nice but as I haven't heard your singing voice, it may do more harm than good…we don't wanna attract coyotes."

"DiNozzo! Go to sleep!" Gibbs said firmly but without rancor.

"On it, boss."

Tony closed his eyes and tried to sleep again, but even as exhausted as he was, something kept pulling him back from the peace of slumber. He'd start to drift off, his body relaxing fully as sleep would seep into his bones. Then a cough would shake him back awake. It went on like that for a while - nearly asleep then a cough, over and over. He'd almost gotten to the point where he was so used to the routine he probably would have fallen asleep anyway. But that's when the muscles in his body began their relentless ache again.

They'd originally started in on him while he'd been riding earlier, pain in his legs, shoulders, arms, hands, hell even his feet. This time, there was no motion of a horse under him to help relieve the pain from the cramping and tensing. It was like a strange form of torture, the coughs and aches keeping him from being able to lay still long enough to claim the rest he needed so badly.

As the muscle spasms in his body grew stronger, Tony slowly began moving - just slightly at first, a gentle rocking of one of his feet. There was something about the motion that felt, well maybe not better, but different, and different was something, different was akin to better. As the pain continued to worsen, it attacked the muscles in his thighs. This made Tony feel an even stronger need to move, to combat the feeling. Soon he his whole body was rocking gently back and forth, back and forth, like some sort of macabre dance.

Causing motion, rather than waiting for the spasms to make his body shake anyway - made Tony feel like he was in control. If he did it himself, then he wasn't only a bystander watching idly as his innards raged a war he couldn't fight with his own two hands. Tony really wished he could fight it - anything was better than sitting back and being a victim. Unable to fight back the way he wanted, he did the only thing he could to take back some semblance of control.

Watching from across the fire, Gibbs was helpless. He knew the earlier exchange was a ruse to cover the discomfort the younger man was feeling, but Gibbs could see what was happening as clearly as Tony could feel it. Remembering what Ducky had said, he'd known that the other man might start feeling pain in his limbs, but knowing it and watching him go through it were two different things and the watching part was a lot harder than he thought it would be. There was absolutely nothing he could really do for him, but unable to watch the younger man suffer any longer, Gibbs got up and knelt at Tony's side.

"Tony, stop." Gibbs ordered quietly, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Can't." Tony said, keeping his eyes closed and continuing to rock his body in time to some unheard tune.

"Yes, you can."

Tony looked up into the other man's eyes and saw something in them that compelled him to pause in his incessant motion. Gritting his teeth, Tony forced his legs stop moving. Shivers still shook his body and coughing rattled his lungs every few minutes, but for now at least, he had stopped forcing the unnecessary movements of his limbs.

Gibbs gave Tony's shoulder a squeeze before nodding his head and settling himself down next to the other man. It had unnerved him to see Tony lose control like that and, even more than that, it worried him that the other man was going to further weaken his taxed system if he'd continued.

The crackling of the fire was the only sound inside the cave, though the storm still rampaged outside. Gibbs checked the sat phone again, knowing it would still be out but feeling the need to see the "out of service" message on the screen with his own eyes to be sure. Rubbing his arms with his hands, he took another piece of wood and threw it on the fire. Stealing a glance at his companion, it appeared that Tony had fallen asleep again. Gibbs didn't know how long he was going to stay asleep, but for Tony's sake, he hoped it would be for a little while at least.

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"Dammit!" McGee's voice ripped through the small hotel room, jarring Ziva awake and causing her to sit up in her chair and blink in confusion until she remembered where they were. The two of them had gotten a hotel room close to the town's small landing field, wanting to be able to get to Gibbs and Tony just as soon as a chopper could lift them out of the canyon.

Ziva looked over from where she'd been dozing in her chair, unwilling to climb into the bed. Her reluctance had nothing to do with bunking down with a member of the opposite sex. She'd done that plenty of times, not only during her time in the army in her own country, but also while on Gibbs' team. She could care less if McGee or any of the other members of the team saw her in sleeping attire. She was forgoing the bed because she didn't think that she deserved to sleep in a nice, warm place while two of her teammates were suffering out in the cold, especially when one of those teammates was ill.

By unspoken agreement, the two agents had thrown their bags on to the empty beds in the rooms when they'd arrived, but had yet to get anywhere near them again. McGee had set up shop at the small desk, pulling out his laptop and the sat phone and setting up chargers for both. The corner was now a mess of wires and constant beeps and noises as one of McGee's programs gave them up-to-the-minute weather reports. With all of his technology though, McGee had no control over their situation and it was starting to really piss him off.

"McGee? What is the matter?" Ziva asked, stretching awake from the chair on the other side of the room.

"The sat phone is still dead. The weather programs are predicting the current storm to get worse in the next two hours, guaranteeing no service for at least that much longer. I still can't get anyone on the line who would be willing to chopper out there, oh and the national weather service is reporting a possible second storm on the way. Take your pick."

Ziva got up slowly and walked over to her partner's side.

"McGee, you have been staring at these screens all night. Perhaps you should…."

"I'm not sleeping, Ziva."

"I did not suggest sleep. But maybe you should step away for a little while. You cannot solve this problem right now and it is not your fault, it is no one's fault."

McGee didn't take his eyes off of his screen. "If I hadn't been an idiot on horseback, Gibbs and Tony wouldn't have had to leave us behind. Then we would have been with them….we could have helped them get to Dina faster and caught Sax faster. Then we would have been back before the storm hit…..before Tony…."

"McGee, you are forgetting that I was unable to control my horse, also. I, too, was a…what did Tony call it…a 'tenderfoot,' yes? We cannot lay blame where there is none to be had.

Gibbs and Tony did what they needed to do and if the roles had been reversed, you and I could just as easily have been the ones out there with Gibbs in the rain."

"Yeah, but neither of us is sick right now," McGee pointed out sullenly.

Ziva turned away and went to look out the window and the rain crashing outside.

"They will be fine, McGee," she stated with conviction.

"How can you know that, Ziva?"

"Because I will not allow myself to think any other way."