I am simply in doubt. Doubt in whether I am doing what my heart feels rather than what I think I should do. I love Maya and always will but, I feel like I have a problem with commitment. I've been in long distance relationships before and they never ended well because I always end up getting hurt. I think I am just talking/flirting with S because I am trying to get over Maya. I just want Maya to be happy but, happy with me. Is that too much to ask? But, regardless I am still going to friends with Maya but move on. I am questioning if being friends with her is even worth it. Her mom doesn't like me but, my mom doesn't either ever since I came out so, I can't blame her. She only calls me when her mom isn't around. I barely talk to her anymore it's sad. Because I love talking to her and hearing her laugh over the phone. It's adorable. Am I able to get over a girl I still partly love, in order to start a new relationship with someone who really likes me? I have to decide and I hate making decisions but, its life. So, I guess it's my time to adapt to it.