I wasn't entirely sure if Rose was being honest about not staying here, but then when I began thinking about it, I decided that it was best if they did. God only knows what they would have had to go through o get in and out of the house on a regular basis and aside from that... I missed them, terribly. I hadn't physically seen either Rose or Alice in over a year and a half. We got on Skype regularly, emailed and we talked on the phone, but it had been entirely too long since we had last been together in the same room.
So the majority of our afternoon was spent eating and cleaning. When I say I cleaned I mean Edward did most of the work. He was ridiculously overbearing ever since we felt the baby move and he wouldn't even let me take the pillow cases off to be washed. I relented, because for one, I appreciated it... and second it was adorable as hell.
However, I was just grateful to have something to busy my mind with. Television was not exactly something that was becoming my favorite thing to do at this point, because it seemed as if every gossip columnist had their own detailed version of what was happening with me and Edward. I wasn't entirely certain that I wanted to hear the sorted details, but from what I had caught from their views so far was that Edward and Kate were childhood sweethearts and had reconnected as adults. However, I was a one night stand that went bad and Edward was doing his best to save the family's name and image. I stopped listening shortly after his conquests over the last six years were plastered on the screen and numbered off one by one.
When I would glance at Edward, I could see that he was frustrated, but he was doing his best to not lose his cool. When he would meet my eyes I could see the nerves going into overdrive as he waited for me to snap. I didn't feel like I was going to snap, but at the same time, I wasn't the picture of ease. There was a long and sorted past that was between us and I had to remind myself that he was with me and he was going to stay beside me... at least that was the plan.
Around five in the evening, Rosalie called. She said that they were getting their connecting flight and would be here around ten in the evening. Edward and I took that time to relax and listen to some music. He was even more adamant that we not watch what was transpiring on television than I was, and I could understand that... I couldn't imagine what it would feel like to have your life being played out in the media as entertainment. However, there was a part of me that felt like I needed to see it... like I needed to know the deeper seeds of what he was doing while I was alone and pregnant. I had heard earlier that they were going to be breaking down the time line and showing the inaccuracies of our relationship... as much as I knew that no good would come from it... I wanted to see it anyway.
Amazing isn't it? The way we sometimes can't let something that is just so wrong go... we know it's wrong, We know it's gonna hurt... but we do it anyway. It's like sensing your husband or boyfriend is cheating... then you have their phone... you see a message from a name that makes your heart drop... you know what it's going to say, you know it's going to hurt, but you have to read it anyway. Yeah... I was about to do that.
I waited until he went to take a shower; I waited until I heard the water on and the shower door close. Then like an addict, I turned on the television and what I was trying so hard to ignore was right in front of me.
I sat stoically for a few minutes and let myself absorb the pain. They weren't saying or speaking of anyone I didn't already know about. Hell I had written about most of them myself in his press releases. But then there were things that I didn't know... there were faces I had never seen, dates and galas that I had not been privy to because I no longer worked on his account.
I watched the dates flash across the screen where the pictures of him and other women adorned the television. He was always so composed, so carefree, like he didn't have a worry in the world. It hurt... badly. I felt my nerves shaking and my stomach fluttering as the tears in my eyes welled up at the images of him holding a girl that wasn't me filled my screen. I felt the same tears that had filled my eyes roll down my cheeks as the date of my doctors visit for my twelfth week flashed at the bottom of the screen alongside a picture of him holding a blonde near a yacht with his hands around her thighs while he smiled a lazy smile and pressed myself against her body, lit up my screen this time.
The narrator went on to say how Edward was seen constantly in a throw of women and that there was no way he and I could have been anywhere near exclusive. I listened to the same band of people continuing on and on about how sad and really unhealthy it was for me to even consider trying to make this work. I was about to turn off the television, so that I could compose myself before he came out and found me watching this.
That thought was stopped though, when the worst possible thing for my eyes to see came on screen. It was a picture of Jessica.
"It would seem that another woman has now been named in this growing throng of women. New reports are now surfacing that Edward Cullen was also having a sexual relationship with Jessica Stanley, the PR rep assigned to his name after Isabella Swan was released from the position. In this report that was received earlier, it states that Ms Stanley was let go from Spitting Image earlier this afternoon for the same misconduct as Isabella Swan."
I felt the air leave my body as the words processed through my head. I couldn't believe that this was what I was hearing... he had been with Jessica... he had been with the only person in this world that I wished had never existed. No wonder he had been so nervous when she was going to speak to the reporters... no wonder he didn't want me to watch this... he didn't want me to know.
I sat there on my couch shaking and unsure of what to say or do, the tears had stopped, I had no tears for this. I didn't know what I had for this. As I let myself take in the report, I remembered the day he had been in the office and getting quite cozy with her... my stomach was churning again and I had to fight to stay in control of it. I'm not sure how long I just sat there without listening, but eventually I heard him. He was beside me and gently grabbed the remote and turned off the television.
"Isabella... please... please talk to me sweetheart." I couldn't find the words just yet, so I kept my eyes straight ahead while I searched for them. "Please... just tell me what you're thinking, love."
That did it, which pulled me from the dark waters I had been drowning in just now.
"Love?" I scoffed. I watched his eyes fall closed and his breath leave his lips with a resigned sigh.
"Sweetheart?" again he sighed but he wouldn't open his eyes. "You say you have loved me for a long time now, Edward..." my tone was not angry... not mean... just even and calm. I was trying to stay calm.
"I have, Isabella... I do.." It was my turn to close my eyes and sigh.
"Why her Edward? Why Jessica Stanley?"
"Bella..."
"No, Edward...why? I don't understand why?" I opened my eyes then and watched as he dropped his head and stared at his feet. I waited... but still nothing. I decided that if he wouldn't start, then I would.
"You know... I had told myself that I could be okay with things in the past... that I could forgive or even move past the fact that you had dated people while you saw me... because you never promised me anything. Because you never led me to believe you wanted more. I got that."
He still wouldn't look at me, but that didn't stop me from continuing. "When I found out I was pregnant and you told me to have an abortion..." he cringed at that and the even mask he had worn while staring at the ground was long gone. I could see the pain my words were having on him... but I didn't really care, his actions were hurting me more. "I knew then that I was alone, that you weren't going to be coming to see how I was doing or if I needed anything. And when I came home that night I laid in bed wondering what you were thinking or even how you were feeling... I thought maybe somewhere inside of you that you were sad... but I know now that you were out getting laid by a bartender from the club Venus."
"Bella." he said in a calm but firm tone, it didn't deter me though.
"When I went to the doctor for my twelfth week checkup, I wondered if you had thought about me since the day you kissed me and left me standing on the sidewalk when you heard a car..."
"Bella please" he begged in a harder voice. But still I wouldn't stop.
"I listened to the baby's heart again and I even cried for it... because it hurt to think of raising him or her alone..."
"I'm here love... I'm here! Were supposed to be going forward, not backward! Please, Isabella! Please stop this!" I could hear his voice breaking as he begged me with everything he had for me to stop. I couldn't.
"I know now that you were fingering a girl before getting on a yacht for weekends trip out to sea... just the two of you." he had stopped trying to get me to relent... I guess he knew it was pointless.
"All of that... I could have gotten past... could have made myself move on from... but Jessica! You knew she worked with me! You knew she could say something to me! You didn't care!" The tears I had tried keeping at bay were making their way down my face fast and hard. It was hurting far too much for me to pretend it didn't. This was killing me... slowly and painfully it was killing me.
I felt my sobs wracking through my body and I was faintly aware of the arms around me as I cried, but I was too far gone to pull away. I don't know if it was because he had broken me, or if it was because he was the only one able to fix me, but I let him hold me while I sobbed inconsolably.
"You need to try and calm down Isabella... the baby... this can't be good for the baby." His voice was terrified and bewildered as he said it. I felt his hands move to my belly to try and rub circles, but that was my true breaking point. I couldn't take it; I couldn't bear to feel him doing that.
"Stop!" I sobbed as I pushed him away. "Don't touch us! Don't you dare try to make this right by using the baby?"
"Bella! I would never... I didn't touch her... I don't know how to...! Please! Please just let me be here for you! I can't leave... I can't be without you!"
"Yes you can! You have! You did it for 15 weeks! You walked away from me without looking back! You thought I had an abortion until you knocked me on my ass at the office! You didn't fucking care!" I was screaming and punching his chest frantically with all the pain and humiliation I felt at that moment. I could see him fighting his own tears before it was too much for him as well.
"What do you want from me?" he screamed with his hands in the air as if in surrender. "What do you want me to say! I fucked up... Yes! I did, I fucked up and fucked other people and I lived my life. I fooled around, but Jessica, or whatever the hell her name is, I didn't fuck her!"
I was much sicker now, too sick to hear this, too sick to see him. I could literally feel my dinner making it's way up my throat and before I could say another word, I was running down the hall and throwing up into the toilet. I couldn't take this, this was far too much. I sobbed as I wretched what was inside me, I stayed hunched over on my knees until I was sure that I wouldn't dirty my floor.
When I flushed the toilet and was trying to stand, I felt his hands helping my weak body up from the floor. When I was up on my feet, I pulled away; I couldn't bear to feel his touch. I grabbed my tooth brush and did a quick brush up and then walked silently into my room. When I was at the dresser, he broke the silence.
"Isabella I am sorry... I shouldn't have yelled... shouldn't have said that."
"No... you were right, and it's true, you lived your life..."
"Please... please don't be like this, you're not being fair."
I chuckled at that comment, because really? Fair? What was fair in a situation like this? I asked those very words aloud.
"And what exactly is fair, Edward? Sitting around here by myself while you finger fuck women or just good old fashioned fuck them in between your visits to my front steps to your yachts? Or maybe it's having to write about all your conquests for the press releases that are a part of my job... certainly that was fair, right?"
His hands covered his face before running through his hair angrily and frustrated.
"Please Isabella... I am begging you to just stop. Please stop thinking about it, talking about it or even worrying about it... I am pleading with you. I can't change it... it's done... but we can change the future, love... that we can control."
I could see his face go pale as he said it. This was making him sick too, and I knew that no matter what I said or did, that I wouldn't feel better and neither would he.
"I need to go and get my friends from the airport, Edward... and... you should go home. You should speak with your family and try to make amends." he was shaking his head no as he watched me back away from him further.
"Bella..."
"You should go..."
"I don't want to lose you." be whispered out.
I didn't have any other words for him that didn't include digging up his past. I was officially emotionally exhausted, I couldn't think of anything to make him understand. I just wanted to be alone.
"Do you know how hard it is feeling the way I do right now?" my voice was raw, absolutely and utterly raw. I was the shell of a woman I had once been just hours ago, but still I continued.
"I feel like my entire world is spinning out of control right now, Edward. Like all the things I had once thought were good are now bad. On the one part I hate you... I hate you for all the ways you hurt me and then turned around to treat others with adoration and attention."
I watched silent tears fall as he watched me, and then dropped his eyes to my stomach. My hand was resting there and our baby kicked as I spoke softly.
"But then there is this other part... this uncontrollable part that loves you. Despite all the way's you have treated me like trash... I still love you." I looked up to see his eyes and I was once again pulled into their depths. "I'm that girl, Edward..."
He looked utterly confused as he met my eyes and I found the strength to elaborate. "The stupid one that say's hit me again but this time really do it good."
I watched his broken form step forward to take me into his arms as he tried to apologize once more.
"How can I make this right Isabella? Please tell me how I can make you stop hurting." There was no answer to that, and I wasn't going to really even try finding one, not right now.
"I need to leave... please don't be here when I get back."
EPOV
I stood there watching her broken soul taking steps away from me. She was literally falling apart and I couldn't do anything to comfort her. I watched her grab her keys and her purse then turn toward the door, but before she walked out, she paused and called out over her shoulder, "I have a sonogram on Wednesday... the appointment is at two pm. I'll send you the info in case you want to come."
Before I could think about it, I was behind her and wrapped my arms around her body.
"I will be there... There is nowhere else I would rather be than with you and our baby..." She didn't respond or even comment on my arms being around her. Instead her arms hung limp at her side until I let her go. When she was free from my grasp, I watched her leave through the door.
How did things get so fucked up so quickly? How did we go from feeling our baby kick to a sobbing mess in the living room? I knew the answer though... I had happened. Well... technically that fucking bitch Jessica happened. I couldn't even comprehend why she was making this up... was it for the publicity? Because to be a notch in somebody's belt was no fucking prize.
I had never touched her, would never touch her... she disgusted me.
On top of her being a stupid, shit talking, little cunt who talked about Bella, she was also her co-worker. It was one thing for Isabella to have to think or assume I was with a girl, but it was another entirely for her to hear about me fucking around with her co-worker.
I sat on the sofa just trying to understand what the hell to make of things, I didn't know if I could just leave with Isabella feeling the way she was feeling... I was afraid what it would say to her if I left now. On the other hand she didn't want me here... I didn't know how to win in this situation.
I decided that abiding by her wishes was probably best, so I sadly gathered the few things that I had there and left her home to go back to my own. The drive was quiet and my mind was in over drive. I had a lot that I needed to prove to her, I had a lot of mistakes to atone for. I let myself fully take that in and then began working on a way to make things right. Unfortunately I had no clue on what the hell could fix this. How do you fix something you continued to break after fixing?
I could not lose Bella for this... I had done a lot of shit that I should have lost her for, but I refused to lose her because of a lie that a jealous little twit made up to cause trouble.
BPOV
"So your saying that you believe him?" Rosalie asked with sarcasm lacing her words. I was laying down with my head resting in Alice's lap as she combed through my hair with her fingers.
"I don't know... I want to believe him. He's been so great... he wants this baby, Rose. He's given up a lot to acknowledge us. Why would he do that if he didn't care?" I was long past crying at this point, my eyes were heavy and tired and my body felt the same way, but I stayed up with the girls because I didn't have anywhere to be in the morning.
Rose didn't comment on what I had just said, but Alice finally jumped in.
"I think you need to follow you heart, Bella... you said it yourself that he has given up a lot. I can't name many men that would give up even a fraction of what Edward has so that they could be with just anyone. You obviously mean a lot to him."
I was nodding my head to agree with her, but then Rose jumped in once again.
"Ah hell, Alice! Don't go giving her all this gum drops and lolly pops bullshit. He stuck his dick in everything and anything willing with a hole! Let's not forget the way he was for what was it? Fifteen weeks!"
I felt Alice's leg twitch; a sure sign that this conversation was not a good one, but that didn't deter Rosalie.
"I would like to kick him in the balls so fucking hard that his junk isn't able to procreate ever again! That would definitely teach him to appreciate Bella!"
I was not about to comment on that. The fact that Rose was talking about smashing up his balls led me to believe that she was not going to let up anytime soon. I sat up and stretched before announcing I was going to bed.
"On that note, I'm going to bed. Your rooms are ready for you, bathroom has plenty of towels and there's lots of food in the kitchen. Help yourselves."
Both waved good night and I made my way into the bedroom and pulled back the sheets to crawl in. When my body was relaxed and the house was quiet, I let myself drift off.
When morning came, along with it came the stress. I received endless amounts of flowers and then even more amounts of chocolates. Rose, Alice and I spent the majority of our time at the table eating whatever amazing assortments that were sent our way. I had no idea who Harry and David were, but man could they grow some fruit.
I received endless calls too. At one point though, Rose answered the phone and gave Edward a half hour talk on sexually transmitted diseases. I had to admit, as fucked up as it was, it was hilarious! Alice and I giggled like little girls in the corner of the room while Rosalie continued to drive home the old saying of no glove no love.
I had yet to speak with him. I was giving myself some space, and him a taste of his own medicine. Well... kind of. It's not like he was pregnant or like he had seen my conquests plastered all over the screen.
I didn't know whether or not to believe him about Jessica, I wanted to, but it was hard to even try when she was actually giving live interviews with graphic details about what they had done and how long they had seen each other. After the first initial viewing, I gave up watching... it hurt too much.
Amazingly though, everything was much more bearable. It was because Alice and Rose were here... I had stories to share, people to talk to and friends to make food with. It was easier to stay in good spirits when you have people keeping your mind occupied instead of sitting around all alone wondering what it was that you had done wrong.
On Tuesday afternoon though a few things changed. First thing was that the lawyer Carlisle had hired for me had come by my home. This was interesting because he was also a lawyer for Edward as well. Jasper was a nice enough guy, but for the most part of his visit, he spent it flirting with Alice. I was happy for her and all, but at the same time I had a lot riding on the lawsuit. I mentioned this aloud at one point but he assured me that all this was formality and that the business would be settling no matter what. I knew he was pretty much right, all the same though... I wanted his head in the game.
Second weird thing that happened was that Rosalie began playing the devil's advocate. She would go off on tangents about Edward but then would shift directions and end up partially defending him. It was hard to keep up with the things that went on in those girls head. She truly was an enigma.
I still wasn't up for going out in public just yet, although Rose assured me that no one would be giving us any grief as long as she was around. I believed her too... it's not as if she had an image to keep up, if anything her kicking someone's ass on television would be living up to her reputation. The woman looked like a beauty queen but was somewhere between a cage fighter and a princess.
So instead, I sent the girls out, and used that time alone to make a phone call that I had been putting off for a while now. As soon as the girls were gone and the house was quiet, I grabbed my phone and called him... he answered on the first ring.
"Baby... are you okay?" I felt my heart sink at the sound of his voice. It was really quite sad how just hearing him speak could nearly break me.
"Hey" I offered weakly. I was already breathing deep and trying to find myself some comfort.
"How are you feeling, Isabella? The baby? How are you doing?" He made it sound as if it had been ages since he had last seen me, when in fact it had been one day. All the same though... it was nice to be missed.
"Were okay... um, that's why I was calling actually"
"What's wrong? What's the matter? Are you feeling okay...?" I could tell he wanted to continue, but that he made himself stop.
"Um, were okay, I just wanted to give you the address for the appointment tomorrow in case you were able to make it."
"Isabella, I will be there... I can't wait." I didn't realize it but the water works had started, it wasn't until I heard myself sniffle that I had processed that was happening. I gave him the address and the basic information about what was going to happen and who I was seeing. He seemed to be drinking in all the information I was saying and I could tell he was writing it down. That made me smile.
"Bella... can I..."he paused to take a deep breath before finishing the sentence. "Can I pick you up so that we can go together? I don't really know how much the press knows about your appointments and such, but... I mean they have all your doctor's visits down to the exact date... I don't want you having any trouble getting there..."
I wanted to say yes... I was literally biting my tongue to keep from blurting it out. I won the battle, but just barely.
"No, but thanks for offering. Rosalie is going to drive me... and well... I can't really foresee us having much of an issue as long as she's coming along."
He chuckled, but it sounded forced. "She's that scary huh?"
I smiled and found myself laughing just a little bit before answering. "Yeah, something like that."
We hung up with a promise of going out for lunch after tomorrow's appointment. I had enough time to think things through, and I was ready to at least hear him out.
EPOV
Wednesday morning was spent in a flurry. I had awoken early, called the restaurant that I was taking Isabella to for lunch and made sure they were still holding our reservation. When that was taken care of, I left the house and did a little jewelry shopping. I didn't want to show up for this even empty handed... this was going to be a day in my personal history books.
By the time I had found the perfect piece to give to Isabella, it was almost one o'clock. I didn't waste time getting to the doctor's office and making sure that I was there early. I wanted to be there when Bella was there... she would not go through another moment alone in this pregnancy. I would always be there.
About fifteen minutes to two o'clock, I saw her small blue car pulling into the parking space in front of the building. I felt the nerves that usually accompanied me when she was around hit me. I didn't want to screw this up... I needed to make this right.
I felt the air leave my body as she stepped out of the car. She was truly a sight for sore eyes... my hands were twitching with a need to go to her and hold her as I caressed her belly. I was pulled from that thought though when I felt a painful thud to the back of my head.
"Rosalie!" I heard Isabella admonish. I snapped my eyes around to find the culprit and was met with the fiercest Blue eyes I had ever seen. I wasn't sure if she was a beauty queen or a pit-bull, but I knew that she scared the living shit out of me. I was still stunned into silence when her venomous tone broke through my moment of confusion.
"If you bring her back to the house and I even get the hint of her having been upset... then you and I will be having a talk with my wrench being the lead speaker. Got it?"
I was still too stunned to say anything when I felt Isabella take my arm and began walking toward the door.
"Goodbye Rose..." I followed blindly to wherever Isabella was leading. I was just happy to be in her presence.
I realized we were inside the office only after Isabella walked to the window to sign in. I followed her every action and repeated it with my own. When she walked, I walked. When she sat, I sat. When she grabbed a magazine, so did I.
We stayed silent as we waited, I would watch her from the corner of my eye and wonder silently in my head if she would slap me for rubbing her belly. I was addicted to doing that. However I was pulled out of my dream world when I heard the nurse call her to the front window.
"Ms Swan, I'm sorry, but your insurance is no longer valid, do you by chance have a new carrier that we can look up?"
"Oh..." I hear Bella say in a nervous tone. She must have not realized that would happen. But of course her insurance was no longer valid, she was no longer employed.
I could hear her whispering something to the lady at the desk but it didn't matter to me. I was out of my seat and reaching for my wallet before Isabella could finish whatever she was saying. I handed the lady my credit card and asked her to run it. Bella turned to me then and I could see the glossy reflection if her tears as she met my eyes.
"I can pay for it, Edward..." I simply shook my head and gently placed a kiss to her head. I pushed my boundaries and placed my right hand at the top of her gentle bump and whispered to her.
"I know you can, Isabella... but this is my responsibility too... this is the least I can do. Please let me do this."
I saw her lip shake as she nodded her head sadly. I was about to take her face in my hands and kiss that quiver away, but the lady from behind the desk interrupted our moment.
"Here you are Mr Cullen, would you like a copy of your receipt?" I turned to look at her and saw the small approving smile that she gave me as she had undoubtedly watched the whole thing play out. I went to take the card, but thought twice and asked her a question that popped into my head.
"Is there any way I can leave my card on file for future visits? Just in case I'm unable to make an appointment?" Bella was already trying to say no, but when the lady nodded her head I handed her the card and took Isabella into my arms and kissed her nose gently, and then her eyes...
"Shhhh, love... please let me... this is all I have really been able to do for you two." I was ready to keep trying to win the argument, but she shocked me by resting her head on my chest and nodding silently.
When the lady handed me my card, I wasn't ready to let go. However just as we pulled away, Isabella's name was called.
"Isabella Swan?" There was a nice woman in a lab coat waiting for us at the door with a smile and we both followed her back into a small room. I watched Bella settle onto the small bed that awaited her and I tried keeping up with what was happening.
I vaguely heard the woman giving Isabella instructions to lay back, nut then she looked at me and asked me to pull up her shirt to expose her stomach. I almost fell out of my chair at the chance to have an active role in this and in no time at all, I had done what she had asked of me.
When I pulled back isabella's shirt though, I had to take a deep breath to calm my nerves. I fought even harder against my instincts to rest my cheek along the swollen bump and kiss her bare skin tenderly. I imagined that was frowned upon when trying to do the wand thingy.
I was watching the woman prep her things and squirt some jelly on Isabella's stomach when I felt warm fingers braid through my own. I looked down at our joined hands then up into Isabella's eyes and I felt nothing but complete.
This was right... I was finally where I needed to be... I was finally where I belonged. I wanted to say those very words aloud, but before I could, there was a swooshing sound filling the room we were in. I still couldn't pull my eyes from Isabella's though... she was so beautiful. When she heard the swoosh, her eyes closed and a smile spread through her gorgeous face. I wondered briefly why that noise had made her so happy, but she answered me with her eyes still closed.
"That's the baby's heart beat..."
My mouth was hanging open and I was searching for the source of the noise. When I jerked my head to the right though, I found it... there on the screen was our little life...
"Oh my god" I breathed out. I couldn't believe that we were seeing the baby. I felt Isabella's hand squeeze my own and I turned to see her smiling at the screen as well. In that instant there were feelings coursing through me that I had no idea I could possess. I knew that feeling things that I felt with Bella were new, but this... this feeling of complete and utter wholeness could only come from having both of them, the baby and Isabella. The package was better than the singular... but only with her... only with my Isabella.
I felt her warm hand rub along my arm as I let those feelings wash over me and suddenly I was aware of another person in the room.
"Would you like to know the sex?" I snapped my eyes to Isabella with a pleading desperation and I found her watching me the same way. Wordlessly we both nodded and smiled and we turned back to the screen. I faintly saw a small arrow moving across the monitor and it had my attention.
"Well I wonder if it will be fire trucks or jungle animals that decorate your son's nursery..."
I lost it then. I was spilling tears faster than my eyes could make them. A son.., Isabella was carrying a son. I watched the screen as he moved around little by little in front of my own eyes. He was beautiful...
I heard sniffling from the bed and looked down to see my love crying. I knew they were happy tears, but I also knew they were emotional tears built up from everything that we were going through. I bent down to kiss her lips reverently and brushed the tears from her cheeks.
"Thank you... for everything... for our son..." I wished my vocabulary had been stronger in that moment, but words were eluding me.
We watched the screen together for a few frames more and then waited as the woman printed different shots for us. As we waited though, I helped Isabella get cleaned up and helped right her clothes. When we had the pictures and a dvd of the experience in our hands, I helped her into my car and we drove silently but in peace to the restaurant for lunch. The whole way there I prayed that we could make it past the hell that Jessica had stirred up.