BPOV

I was in and out of sleep during my time at the hospital. I would hear Edwards worried voice drifting in and out along with my consciousness. He had been worried about why I was so tired and I heard Dr Scance playfully tease him that it would last about eighteen years at the least... when I heard that, I knew my little boy was going to be okay. After that I let myself rest, I let myself just sleep and not worry... I was simply too tired to do anything more.

Around the third day there, I'd heard Esme's calm voice and Edwards gentle fingers combing through my hair as she spoke quietly to him. "What are you going to do when she's allowed to leave? She can't be alone... and her friends have lives to get back to in Seattle..."

The truth was that I hadn't even thought about that. I couldn't be alone... I was supposed to be on bed rest... I didn't know what was going to happen.

I felt Edwards lips on my forehead and then on my nose before he answered her. "I've been thinking about that ever since we arrived... I don't know how to ask her... I don't want to stress her, she cannot be stressed." The room was silent for a moment and I began to drift back into slumber, but then I felt his cool hands running over my stomach and his words were broken. "I have hurt her so much, mom... there's no way she'll let me bring her home with me... or me with her." I felt my body tighten at his words but I made my self relax... I couldn't afford to get upset right now. Instead I put it on the back burner and let sleep claim me once again.

By the time Sunday rolled around, I was a new person. I felt completely relaxed and fresh as I sat up in my bed and devoured the tuna melt that Carlisle and Esme had brought me from my favorite diner. I was in the clear to go home, but Dr Scance had explained that I would be on bed rest for at least a month and if there was no more bleeding and my next few check ups were okay, then we would play it by ear. However there was that entire month of not moving or doing anything that worried me the most. I had no job, I couldn't get a new one... and I was now sixteen weeks pregnant. My life had gone from stressful to impossible in the course of four days.

I tried not to think about it but as I finished the last of my sandwich, I realized that I had to think about it. I was supposed to go home in a few hours... and I had no way of taking care of myself. I must have had the look of confusion all over my face, because Edward was beside me in an instant and doing what he could to find out what was wrong.

"Love? What's wrong?" I popped my eyes up to meet him and then met Rosalie's eyes in the same second. She looked upset... she knew I was going to be alone and she knew that she had to leave. They both did... Alice and her both.

"Rose... when do you and Alice leave to go back home?" I tried sounding casual but one look at her face told me it didn't come across that way.

"We leave tomorrow... we could only get a week off from work... we were lucky to even get that on such short notice." I tried to smile, but I couldn't get my heart to get on board with my face and I ended up breathing deeply and doing my damnedest to not break down. Why was everything spiraling down? How come when I found some semblance of normality it had to be trumped by the endless reminders that I was indeed alone.

"Oh..." was all I replied. I sat there with my thoughts going about a mile a minute. I must have said something aloud because suddenly Alice was rambling about schedules and cover and how she should be able to just stay and deal with the consequences later. I felt horrible that she would even think of putting herself or her career in jeopardy.

"No, Alice... I'll figure it out, please don't you even think like that." I took a deep breath and let myself start working out the puzzle that was playing in my head and doing what I could to make the pieces fit cohesively without inconveniencing anyone.

Realistically I knew that Edward meant it when he said he was here for me, I knew he wanted to be there for the baby... but we were beyond a screwed up pair. With his life on a constant loop and circulating the television along side my trust issues and inability to forget, I just didn't see a situation with him and I living together... no matter how temporary, working out.

"Isabella, I was hoping that when we had a moment alone I could talk to you about that" Edwards voice was very careful and I could hear the way he thought about his words as he spoke them.

I looked around the room when I saw movement and watched everyone piling out of the door as discreetly as possible. I noticed Rosalie was the only one who didn't budge, she sat stoically in her chair and watched Edward and I with a calculated eye. She was sizing up the situation... she was weighing her options and trying to find what it was she was looking for. God only knew what that was, but knowing Rose, she was trying to see if him being with me was even worth talking about. When it was only the three of us, Edward continued on.

"Bella, you can't be alone, love... if something were to happen and you needed help, if the baby needed help... I couldn't bare it if you were hurting and we couldn't get to you in time."

He sure didn't waste time jumping into things. He painted the worst picture possible but at the same time, I understood he was being realistic. I looked over to Rosalie and she gave me a look that said, "yep... he's got you there." I wasn't ready for that though... there had to be another way.

"What about my mom..." Rosalie stiffened and looked to Edward and in that moment, I knew it was over. My battle was lost.

"What?" I asked unsurprised. Rosalie was the one to answer.

"She just left for a safari in Africa... but, she sends her love and hopes you feel better." her words trailed away at the end of that sentence, but I wasn't all that hurt. It's just who my mother was... it's how she had always been.

"Rose, do you mind if I talk with Edward in private?" It was only a few seconds after that until we were completely alone. I let my body fall back against the bed carefully and Edward adjusted my pillows so that my back was cushioned and my belly had a soft resting place. He was bestowing such care on me... he was literally terrified of losing us... not just the baby. When I had that thought fresh in my mind, the rest was easy to follow.

"I know that I'm not forgiven, Isabella... I know that you would rather not have to stay with me or vice versus, but... please just let me get you through this month. When you and that baby are out of danger, we'll reevaluate what happens after that."

It wasn't the matter of forgiving him... it was the fact that I didn't understand him. I didn't understand how he could claim to love me for a long time now and then turn around and say the things he said and do things he did. It just didn't add up. So either he lied about loving me, or he's just more fucked up in the head than I had initially thought. For me the pain was in the details... the details of how he would happily be seen with all those women, but hide away with me.

I didn't really want to get into the details about the way I saw things, because for one I would more than likely fall apart or get pissed. Second was because I truly was just tired of this conversation. I decided to let it go and gave him my conditions.

"Will we be staying at my house?" I watched his face go from excited, to pleased, then immediately to relieved before answering.

"It's probably safer to be at my home, love... the building has security and there are orders already in place for the employees not to comment about my... I mean our private life."

"This is going to be really hard, Edward"

"I know" he said gently.

"I don't trust you" I added

"I know" he offered sadly

We didn't say anything else for a moment and when I had turned the situation around in my head, over and over again, I finally relented.

"I'll stay with you"

When the time had come for me to leave the hospital, everyone's nerves were on high alert. I understood that they were all still very tense about the baby, but Dr Scance had assured Edward and I many, many times over that as long as I took things easy and stayed on bed rest, that we would be healthy and could make it through to full term.

However, as soon as I was rolled out front in my wheelchair, the reasons for everyones paranoia made perfect sense. It seemed as if every gossip reporter, or news anchor in the greater Chicago area was currently residing out front. Before I could even begin to feel the true definition of overwhelmed, Edward, had scooped me up into his arms and was making his way through the people and shielding my body. I faintly heard Carlisle yelling at someone that had apparently pushed forward and was trying to get to Edward. Carlisle was no longer the composed man I had seen and written about, he was fierce when protective.

The drive to Edward's penthouse was quiet. He didn't try to make conversation and neither did I. Instead I let myself enjoy the silence and the peace that came with it. I felt our little boy kicking actively as the drive neared its end, and when it was time to exit the car, Edward had once again taken me into his arms and carried me through the lobby and into the elevators.

I had been here many times before, but being here now was a completely new experience. For one, I was in Edward's arms and he was peppering my face freely with kisses as we waited for the doors to open up at his floor. Yes, this was very different.

When we were finally through his front door, he wasted no time taking me straight to the bedroom.

"I had Rose and Alice grab some things for you and Esmerelda put them in the dresser and closet for you... I mean, I'm sure that with being on bed rest and all, you wont really need much but pajamas, but I figured you might want some stuff here all the same." I was almost certain that I had seen a flash of excitement in his eyes when he had said that last part. I think he was rather enjoying the fact that I was here and so were some of my things.

I watched him for a little while as he moved around the room and explained how to use the remotes. There were remotes for everything... the light, the air, the fire place, the television, the stereo... I almost told him he was stressing me, but I decided that he would probably miss the fact that I was teasing him and drive me right back to the hospital.

"Thank you, Edward... for... well for taking care of me. It means a lot to me."

He stopped moving around and just stared at me for a moment as if he were working out some kind of puzzle that was plaguing him.

"I know I haven't been the best person to you, Isabella... and I am sorry about that. But all I can do now is show you that I'm here... I'm not going anywhere, I want to be here. Always."

his was going to be a very difficult transition, for both of us. Granted it wasn't as if I were going to be getting up and cleaning things and rearranging, my existence in his home would be very one dimensional. I was just going to be laying down... in bed... in his bed.

I felt the warmth rush over my face at that single thought and I felt my pulse quicken. I knew that even with as much as we had been through, there was no turning off the physical and emotional attraction I had for him. I ached for him, I ached for the feel of his warm arms caressing and holding me. That never got old.

My only saving grace was that sex was out of the question. I wasn't allowed to be aroused... it could cause contractions... and I wasn't in any condition for that to start happening, our little boy wasn't ready to come out yet.

He didn't say anything else after that, but instead came to my side, kissed my head and said he was going down to the car for the things that were still in the car.

I laid back and let myself get comfortable while I waited for him to come back, I was only on twenty minutes of bed rest and already I was bored out of my mind. Not long after he had left the room and I heard the front door close, I heard it reopen.

I figured he had forgotten his keys or something so I called out to him.

"Hey! That was pretty darn fast Mister" I was smiling as I waited for him to give me a comeback or even one more kiss, but instead I heard the voice of a female... not Edward.

"Edward? Are you here?"

I felt my body go cold as the reality that this was probably one of the many that had graced my television screen not even a week ago. I closed my eyes and tried breathing in and out so that I could stay calm. I couldn't afford to be hurt right now, I couldn't afford any emotion that would cause me to stress. All too soon though, the voice was in the room with me.

"Oh!" she said in a surprised and nervous voice.

I opened my eyes very carefully and came face to face with beauty reincarnated. She was exactly what I imagined on Edwards arms... she wasn't me. Her blonde hair was smooth and in perfect place as well as her airbrushed make up and designer clothes and hand bag.

"I am so sorry..." she began, and she truly sounded as if she meant it. I didn't know what to say, I juggled with telling her he would be back soon and to wait, or if I was supposed to be scared and nervous. She didn't look like she would hurt me though. I decided I needed to at least give her some response. She didn't wait for one though.

"You must be Isabella... right?"

"Yes..."

"How are you feeling? And the baby? You are both well, yes?"

I was outright confused now. I wasn't sure if this was a Charles move. Was she just reeling me in with her nice tone only to shank me with her words after? I played it very careful.

"Were doing better than we were... thank you for asking."

We stayed staring at each other for a moment and then she looked around the room and smiled.

"I'm sorry that I just barged in on you like this. I was looking for Edward... he hasn't returned any of my calls." she looked at her shoes a little sheepish and I felt relief flood me at the same moment. He hadn't called her back... he wasn't calling her...

I made myself stay focused though. This girl... whoever she was, had access to his home and felt more than comfortable with letting herself in. I didn't let my mind wander down the aisle of that though for too long, because if I did, my easy going woo-sah attitude would be blown out of the water.

I was just about to tell her that he would be right back, but no sooner than I thought the words, I heard him come through the front door.

"Love, do you want your flowers in the room so you can see them? Or does the smell overwhelm you?" He came around the corner and through the door just as he finished that sentence and the flowers he held in his hands fell to the ground. The only noise in that moment was the crystal vase shattering at his feet.

"Get out." His words were venomous as he said them to the girl standing at the foot of the bed. She physically flinched at the tone of his voice.

I watched the entire interaction with wide eyes as I rubbed soothing circles at my belly. If this had been a week ago... I would have been dieing to see what was going to happen, but with the new turn of events in my health, I really just wanted to get up and walk out. I really didn't want to see what may or may not happen at the moment. In that thought, I saw Edward's head snap in my direction and his eyes widening. Before I could calm him though, he was at my side and kneeling at the bed and rubbing at our son as well.

"Baby, are you okay? Are you in pain? Did she say something to you? Are you upset?" I didn't get a chance to answer him because he was facing the nameless girl still at the foot of the bed watching us.

"I said GET OUT!" His voice was threatening and even I flinched from the volume and my heart thumped loudly in my chest. Along with my reactions, the baby began playing Dance Dance Revolution in my stomach.

Edwards head snapped back to my eyes and instead of fury they held wonder. He stuttered a breath and continued to stare at our wonder that was moving my me and spoke in a calm hushed tone that was somehow scarier than his wrath.

"I will not ask you again... leave."

I glanced up to see her form backing away with watery eyes and confusion on her face. She did as he asked but couldn't help saying one last plea. "E-Edward... I thought we... well I just thought that we could go out on the boat..."

In that instance two things happened. The first was that my jello began rising in my throat, and the second I recognized her from the pictures the news had of he and her "preparing" to go out to sea. I was trying to get out of the bed then, I wasn't even thinking and I got as far as putting my feet on the floor before I heard Edward's worried voice trying to get me to lay back.

Simultaneously he was shouting for the woman to leave and never come back and when he realized I was still fighting to get up. I figured he needed me to spell it out for him.

"Edward, I need to throw up... please move." I begged. He scooped me up and had me in the bathroom in record time and I was dry heaving over the porcelain crown in no time at all.

"Baby, I'm so sorry! Are you okay? Should I call an ambulance? Are you getting cramps?' He was on the verge of tears at that point but all I could offer him was a shake of my head as I caught my breath and tried to gain my composure.

This moment right here was exactly why I didn't want to be here... at his mercy and under his roof. He had the home advantage as well as the numerous booty calls dropping in. I didn't think I could do this for a month.

Apparently I had said those very words aloud because he was nearly falling over himself trying to convince me otherwise.

"Love, I can promise you that nothing like that will happen again. I don't even know how she gt in here... I don't even know how she knew where I lived!"

I turned then and raised my eyebrow to signal that I wasn't convinced on that last point.

"She probably knows where you live because of the last time she was here..."My words were cut off immediately by his reply.

"I have never brought anyone here, Isabella... only you."

I sat there on the bathroom rug with him just staring. I was almost certain that he was lying to me but when he took my face into his hands and held my gaze, I began to believe otherwise.

"Only you..."

I didn't really know what an appropriate reply to that was, so I just sat there unmoving and unblinking. A few moments alter, I was in his arms again and he was placing me back in the bed. He tucked me in, surrounded me with pillows and then kissed me cheek before going to the main room, locking the door and calling the front lobby.

Could hear him giving directions to whoever he was talking with to not let anyone other than his parents and a few other names I hadn't recognized. All the while he was picking up the crystal pieces and gathering the roses that had been inside.

I watched him silently as he carefully placed the roses into a new, more elaborate vase and place it beside the bed for me. When the spot was vacuumed and the water was sopped up, he took off his shoes and crawled onto the bed with me. We lay facing each other and not talking and after a few minutes of that he rested his hand on my belly and sighed a content breath.

With his eyes closed he began talking to me.

"I sometimes think that all this crap that happens is just Karma's way of getting back at me. I was so happy to have you here... Im still happy to have you here. I could only think about how nice it would feel to have you with me all the time, and how good it would feel to be of use to you... how I could be the one taking care of you..."

I didn't say anything as he paused, but I let myself move closer to him and draped half of my leg over his own. He continued.

"... Even when I'm trying to do things right, when I'm trying to prove to you that this can work, that wecan work... something always comes in and disrupts the progress we make."

I turned his words over in my head and dissected each sentence... just like I always do. After about three minutes of silence, I went ahead and started my own rambling sentence.

"I prayed a lot... at night, during the day, when you would kiss me, when you left me..."

He let out a moan that was pained, but I kept going. "I used to pray that you would want me the way I wanted you, that you would somehow be everything I knew you could be... but mostly I prayed for the patience that would get us to a point where that was possible."

I smiled as I remembered my favorite quote. I almost kept that part to myself, but I decided that since we were being honest, that I should not hold back.

"Have you ever seen the movie, Evan Almighty?"

Edward opened his eyes then and a grin spread over his face as he shook his head no. "Bruce Almighty was enough stupid for me, the second would have just been too much."

I tightened my eyes in mock hostility but continued on with my point.

"Well, as you know it's about a regular human man being guided by, God... well, there is this part where God tells Evan something that has always stuck with me."

The smile was still on his face, but I could tell he was taking me serious. I appreciated that.

"He said, people always pray for patience and expect it to be instant. But that instead of that, God gives us opportunities to practice patience... and that that is how we gain it."

I watched Edwards face as he thought about what I had just said and when I was sure he was still confused, I continued with mt point.

"What just happened... with that woman here..." He was about to apologize again, but I stopped him.

"That was me being given an opportunity to practice patience."

In an instant his arms were around me and his face was buried in the nook between my belly and breasts. I held him and he held me, and for the first time in a long time I was able to hope that even if this didn't work out, that we would come out of this different people... better people.