Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter 2

~~~~ In Godric's Hollow ~~~~

It was well past noon when James woke to a horrifying sight, even with his glasses off.

Sirius was holding himself in his hand, waving it less than a foot from James' drool smeared chin, asking, "Do you think I've put some muscle on with that intense workout I got, Prongs? Eh? What do you think?"

"Put that away, Padfoot. What's wrong with you?"

"Keep dreaming. This has plowed so much trim, I think I should be eligible for an agriculturerererer of the year."

"What?"

"Er er er, Prongs. Get it?"

"What are you rambling about?"

"That's what the girls say when I'm jamming it down their throats. Er er er."

"Uh, whatever …" he muttered, putting on his glasses. Now that they were on, he saw that Sirius had only stepped back, but had not done as he requested. "Put your … away. What if my mum comes in?"

"I'd politely refuse, mate."

James suddenly realized what Sirius was suggesting, and his face scrunched up in disgust. "Don't talk about my mum that way."

"I was only kidding. If your parents hadn't let me move in, where would I be now?"

"Probably laying face down in a pool of your own vomit, Padfoot."

Sirius smirked thinking of the past week of girls and firewhiskey. It was a blur, but he'd always remember it as the best week he ever forgot.

"Hey, are Remus and Peter already up?"

"Yeah, they went either to the pub or the post office or something."

"Oh, I wanted to see when they wanted to go to Diagon Alley."

"Yeah, I need more fireworks too."

"No, I meant for our school things."

"What? We got almost two weeks yet. You're letting this head boy nonsense go to your head."

"Hey, Evans wants me to concentrate on my studies."

"What does that got to do with me? Or even you for that matter? Nag, nag, nag … you don't need that."

"It's our last year at school, mate."

"Yeah, so? You don't have time to be hitting the books. You need to concentrate on what's important. World Cup. Next summer. You got to train."

"Train. Schmain. I'm a natural. I'm sure to make the team for England."

"No, no, you got to show a good work effort. Remember, Prongs? What that guy from … was it Portney … anyway, after the Cup, you'll be looking to take your pick of professional teams, so you got to show them that you train hard and play hard."

"You're right, Padfoot. A week of Evans just got me all muddled. I'll let her know that I don't have time for that book stuff."

"Let her know? Why would you let her know anything?"

"She's my girlfriend now," James announced.

Sirius laughed and kept laughing until the crestfallen look on James face made him slow down to a chuckle, then stop. "What?" he asked.

"I'm serious."

"Me, Sirius. You, numbnut."

"No! Seriously, Evans agreed to go out with me. I can't wait till the first Hogsmeade weekend. I'll take her to Honeydukes, Zonkos and then for a butterbeer at the Three Broomsticks. Yeah, it'll be great."

"No, it won't. If you want company for Hogsmeade, wait until Friday just before it to ask her. There's no need to burden yourself with a steady girlfriend, Prongs. You're our quidditch captain."

"It's more than a date to Hogsmeade," James replied airily.

Sirius laughed, "I don't care how good you think Evans was, Prongs. Without that potion, she's not going to do a tenth of that stuff."

"What potion?"

"The potion."

"She wasn't on any potion. Evans has always fancied me."

Cooing, Sirius simpered a bit and called to James, "Oh toerag."

James grinned like a goon. Evans did call him that a lot.

"Get over yourself. Wormtail gave her some pumpkin juice when she first got there, just like the rest of them."

"What rest of them?"

"I know you probably took your glasses off so you weren't blinded by the great expanse of pale skin in front of you, but there were other girls in the house. How do you think Wormtail scored two hot babes? One of each."

"Each?"

"One blonde and one brunette."

"Wait, Peter had two girls?"

"Yeah."

"So he bought some love potion and gave it to them?"

"No, not love potion. As soon as they stop taking that, they'll want to kill you or worse."

"Oh yeah, Slughorn did say that people on love potion remember how they acted."

Sirius rolled his eyes. Now Prongs remembered. Couldn't remember it for his OWL, but a few gifts got spread around and old Sluggy let Prongs join him and Peter in NEWT level. Sirius would have stuck his head in his cauldron and boiled it if he had to have Wormtail giggling in his ear constantly.

James shooed Sirius out of his bedroom so he could have the house elves get him dressed. He had to fix his own hair because they could never get it right, no matter how long they worked on it.

After he was finished getting ready, he found the guys out on the veranda enjoying a late lunch. James joined them because he was famished, having slept completely through breakfast.

While Sirius was buttering a roll, he muttered, "Ow. Oi, you elf, butter this for me."

"Aren't you getting a little old to have a house elf cut up your food?" Remus asked.

"It's my wrist. I think I sprained it with all those contraceptive charms," Sirius said while waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Peter laughed. Sirius was so funny.

Remus shook his head.

James declared indignantly, "You? That's the girl's job, mate."

"Uh, James, you did cast it last week on Evans?" Remus reminded him.

"What? She knows her charms. I think that's Evans' best subject."

"Prongs ..." Peter started, but Sirius cut him off, "Oi, I told you with that potion they wouldn't be in their right minds. I showed you the charm to cast. Did you cast it, or did you see her cast it sometime?"

"Huh? What are you talking about? Contraception is the woman's responsibility. I'm not the one that's going to end up pregnant."

Even though he knew this was a serious matter, Peter cheered his agreement out of habit, "Yeah!"

"When we talked about this, I showed you the charm. You verbally agreed that you heard and understood. Don't go playing games on me now, Prongs. Did you cast it?" Sirius asked.

"Uh, I think Prongs may have agreed, but not been paying attention," Remus explained. "He nicked another snitch and that seemed to have his full attention."

"When was this?" James asked. He had bought a whole crate of snitches to play with.

Unable to contain his enthusiasm since he played such an important part in the plan, Peter loudly said, "When Padfoot found that wonderful potion. The girl thinks she just got a craving for a little action, but not for someone in particular. See? It's better than a love potion because they don't get all ga ga over a wizard."

"Where'd you find that?" James asked. This was the first time he had heard of it.

"In a book, you dope. It makes a witch really loose and she'll do it with any bloke."

Catching on, James panicked and asked, "None of you touched Evans, did you?"

"No, we kept pushing her back to you whenever she came crawling up to us. We knew you picked her," Sirius told him.

"She was crawling?"

"And drooling," Peter giggled.

"Where was I?"

"Asleep, I think. She kept getting out of your room," Sirius complained.

"Really?"

"Yeah," Peter agreed. "You should have tied her to the bed or something."

"Listen, if you did not cast any charms on her, I think we have a problem," Remus interjected.

"What?" James asked. "It's a proven fact that a woman cannot get pregnant the first time she does it."

All three responded at once with their own observations.

Peter cheered in a singsong voice, "Oh yeah, you scored another cherry. Let's hear it for Prongs! Woot! That makes it eight now, and catching up with Padfoot."

"You only did it once?" Sirius scoffed. Then he answered Peter, "Uh, excuse me, Wormtail, but if we're still keeping score, I hit twenty-nine. None of you will ever catch me."

Remus was trying to remind them, "That potion had a fertility component. Remember? There was that odd explanation of how it was to be used."

Peter ignored Remus to demand, "I'll need names, Padfoot."

Sirius chose to ignore Peter and answer Remus with a dismissive wave of his hand, "That's for special cases. Newlywed brides that won't let the old geezer they were sold to touch them. It's a lot more humane for them to take a potion like this, then to be forced."

"Did it say how fertile?" James asked.

"Don't worry about it," Sirius said. "She can go see Pomfrey, if she is, and it'll be taken care of."

"Madam Pomfrey handles that sort of thing?" Remus asked.

"All the time," Sirius claimed. "Can't have the school full of little screaming Blacks."

"Yeah, or little Wormtails."

James, Sirius and Remus all gave Peter the same look that spoke volumes as to how likely they thought that was.