New chap! I'm pretty excited for the new episode tomorrow. But it also means that this fic's coming to an end sooner or later.
Thanks for sticking with me! I see that more and more people favourite this story and review it. Thank you so much.
I hope you enjoy it and that you can look past its flaws. It's my first fic after all.

setting: episode 11 "Judge, Jury, Executioner" (+ deleted scene)

Salvation

Chapter 28 - Doubts

They left the shed half an hour later. Daryl had been pretty rough by the end of their questioning and now that they were out of the shed Connor felt guilty.
The problem was that he couldn't really tell whether the boy was innocent or not so he was having a hard time deciding if it was right to torture him like that.
Daryl headed for his tent and Connor had trouble keeping up with him because of his injury.

"Eh Murph, don't fuckin run like that" he said after a moment and heard Daryl sigh.

The hunter turned around and eyed his friend.

"So now yer injured for once and can't keep up with me and I'm all glad I can run away from yah and now yer asking me t' wait?"

Connor nodded and stopped walking to rest for a minute.

"So, I take it yer nat gonna leave the group?"

"Nope. At least not yet. Not til this is finished. I owe 'em."

"So can I get me stuff an..ye know, come back ta te tent? I don't wanna be with that group on me own. Besides, ye need someone ta watch yer ass out there.
In case walkers attack?"

Daryl snorted.

"I can watch my ass just fine."

"So I take that as a yes?"

Daryl rolled his eyes and turned around.

"Whatever. Freak."

He headed for his camp when Connor turned around to get his bag and guns from inside the RV. He heard how Rick and the group were discussing what to do with Randall and when he was just about to tell them what he and Daryl had heard he saw his friend coming. He was wearing his biker vest again, with his crossbow strapped around his shoulder. So he was planning on going hunting again. Connor grabbed his bag and joined him.

"Boy there's got a gang, 30 men. They have heavy artillery and they ain't looking to make friends.

They roll through here, our boys are dead and our women, they're gonna - they're gonna wish they were."

The Irishman grabbed a smoke and nodded.

"Aye, started showing off with those guys. Apparently, they go out, scavenge an whenever they meet other groups they torture and kill the men and rape the girls.
Sick shit."

"What did you do?" Carol asked and pointed at Daryl's bloody knuckles.

"Had a little chat" he said and turned around to leave.

Carol looked at Connor then. He knew what that look meant.

Why didn't you stop him? It isn't right.

The Irishman turned his head and looked at Daryl. All he saw was the angel wings on his vest. He sighed.

I know.

"No one goes near this guy." Rick said and left as well.

"I'm with Murph if ye need me" Connor murmured and followed Daryl.

"Where are ye going?" the Irishman asked as he followed his friend back to the farmhouse.

Daryl turned around in surprise and looked at Connor, who had caught up with him and smiled at the hunter. Daryl just rolled his eyes.

"Just cos I saved yah ass and allowed yah t'sleep in my tent it don't mean that I want yah with me all the time" he murmured and sat down on a stone.

Connor grinned at him and grabbed a smoke.

"Well, should've thought about it before coming t'get me outta that car."

Daryl lay his crossbow down on the ground and looked at his bloody knuckles. The Irishman noticed all the blood and frowned.

"Want me ta get ye something?"

The hunter looked at him and snorted.

"No? Besides, 'm pretty sure Carol's running to get me stuff."

Connor nodded and looked down. For a while he just kept smoking and kicking the grass. He sighed and chewed on his lower lip.

"Do you think we were too hard on that kid?" he murmured and Daryl raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

The Irishman shrugged and looked at the shed where Randall was.

"Do you think we were too hard on him. Ye know, te whole torturing part. Especially you, man."

Daryl growled.

"What, yah think I didn't see how Carol glared at yah after trying t'stare me down? I told yah t'leave me be and get the fuck outta there.
Not my problem that you decided t'stay. I told yah to leave if yah don't like what yah see."

Connor snorted and looked at his friend.

"Aye, cos I'm that sort af man who turns his back on evil shit."

His friend raised both his eyebrows and snorted.

"Evil shit? News flash for yah, leprechaun: you did the same evil shit. Not just me. So don't get me started on yer justice crap. Remember that you were the one
who pulled his gun and wanted t'shoot the kid after yah heard about the raping bullshit. So don't come here and tell me about 'evil shit'."

"Aye! But I didn't do all that psycho shit with the knife. Jesus, look at yer fuckin knuckles!"

The hunter growled and turned his head. He saw Carl coming to join them.

As if Connor didn't mean trouble enough.

"Yah know what? 'm gettin real tired of yah shit all the time. How about you make up yer mind for once? Don't go in there and help me with the kid only t'be a sissy afterwards.
Help me or not, I don't care. But yah decide it's against yer oh so precious beliefs? Don't bother talking t'me about that shit then."

Connor snorted and threw his cigarette away.

"So yah think it was the right call, asshole?"

"I'd do it again in a heartbeat, mick."

The Irishman glared at his friend. Part of him just wanted to get into a fight because he hated how arrogant Daryl was right now.
When he turned his head to see what his friend was looking at he was surprised to see Carl standing there.
Connor and Daryl exchanged a quick glance and the Irishman sighed.

"I'm gonna go and put my stuff back in te tent" he murmured and headed back.

"Yeah, whatever" Daryl answered and glared at Carl.

The boy grinned when Connor passed him and ruffled his hair. The hunter had no idea why Rick's son would come to him, now that he saw that his friend was walking away. He had thought that the kid had come because of Connor, but that wasn't the case. Daryl looked at his bloody knuckles again. He tried flexing them and grunted when it hurt.

"Did it hurt to punch the guy?" Carl asked and Daryl looked up.

Had the kid read his mind? Of course it hurt.

For a moment he had thought that he had managed to break them.
He hated to admit that he was in pain, so he just shook his aching hands and looked at the kid.

"I've been hurt worse. You, too, buddy" he answered when he remembered that Carl had been shot just a couple of weeks ago.

Rick's son snorted and smiled. He came closer and pointed at Daryl's crossbow.

"Can you teach me how to shoot that?"

Oh right, now he knew why Carl had come to him.

He had never really talked to the kid before, simply because he didn't know how to talk to kids. He had found the kid way too annoying anyway.
Of course he would come because of the crossbow. He had seen how the kid had admired it from afar. Even back in Atlanta.

"Your arm ain't long enough" Daryl murmured and stroke his bruised knuckles absently.

Carl shook his head and showed him his arms.

"Yeah it is" he protested, being the stubborn child that he was.

It made the hunter snort.

"Stick to guns. It takes a lotta skill."

He was beginning to feel weird about the whole thing. He was pretty sure that Carl had got the wrong impression because of all his searching for Sophia. Daryl didn't like that Rick's son obviously believed that he liked kids because of it, but that wasn't true. He cursed himself for making Connor leave. The Irishman was way better at this. Simply because Carl obviously adored that freak. He heard footsteps coming from the farmhouse and turned his head to see who it was. Carol was coming to join them with things for his bruises in her hands.

"Where's your old man? Why don't you pester him?" the hunter asked Carl who rolled his eyes and turned around to leave.

Daryl got up and grabbed his crossbow when Carol came to a halt in front of him and handed him the medical supplies.

"Did you get what you wanted?" she asked and looked both disappointed and disgusted.

He turned around as if she was going to leave, but she just stood there and looked at him. Daryl grabbed the things and glared back at her.

"Approval? Thanks?"

The hunter didn't know what to say.

"Couldn't hit me, almost killed Connor, and now that you can't hit him anymore you beat up a kid, is that who you are now?"

Daryl looked down and growled. He knew that he had almost hit her. He knew that he had almost killed Connor, more than once. He hated her for bringing this up.
As if he didn't feel guilty enough. The hunter wasn't proud of what he had done.

Of course. But why wouldn't she get that he was trying to do the right thing this time? Why wouldn't anyone get that their prisoner wasn't a kid, that he was dangerous?

"Ain't no kid. He'd do a lot worse than hittin' yah if you gave him a chance" he murmured and looked back at her.

"This isn't what this is about, and you know it" she responded.

It made him frown. He turned around to look at her properly.

"What do you want me to do? Huh?"

She just stood there and looked at him. And Daryl knew that she didn't have a clue either. He snorted and turned away again.

"I don't need this."

"Don't pretend like you don't care…You want your friendship back? Take it. Every kind and smart thing you've said, take it all back. Push everyone away.
Connor, me, the group. Take your tent and move away from us. I don't care. I've lost worse. "

Daryl just stared at her.

"But don't sit back here and tend to your bloody fists…and pretend you don't care" she went on and turned around without waiting for an answer.

The hunter watched her leave and started rubbing his knuckles again. He didn't know how to react. He knew that Carol was right. The only problem was that he still didn't want to care. About anything. He didn't want to care about the torture and all the things they made him do now, and he sure as hell didn't want to care about Carol and Connor. Especially Connor. Caring only meant trouble. Sophia's death had shown him that all too clearly. Daryl sighed and sat back down to tend his knuckles. Thinking about all that stuff made him angry but in the end he came to the conclusion that she was right. He still believed that torturing the kid had been the right thing to do, but there was no need to keep pushing everyone away. They obviously cared about him, no matter what he did. And maybe it was time to accept that.

Connor was busy unpacking his stuff when he had to think about the kid again. How Daryl had beaten him up. He remembered what his friend had told him about his past and family. He was an abused child after all but that he could be soviolent... He knew that Daryl wasn't evil by nature. He had seen his good side. The redneck had gone looking for that little girl after all. He'd tried to cheer Carol up. He'd cut his rope and talked him out of suicide. He'd come back and saved him from the walkers. It had been Daryl who'd pulled him out of the car. But still. It had also been him who'd tortured the kid.

What happened ta you? Yer an animal!

Connor had seen him change. Twice. He remembered the first time he had seen Daryl. So pissed. So angry. So alone. Then he had changed for the better. He had opened himself up to him. He had let him be his friend. And then Sophia had died. And Daryl was turning into something else. Those people were abusing him as their wing man. Simply because they never looked past his Redneck attitude. He knew, no he hopedto know, why Daryl was doing things like that now. Not because he enjoyed beating people but because he still wanted to be part of this group. Because he wanted to play a role in the group. People wouldn't take him seriously as leader although Connor knew that he was capable of that. So all that was left was to be their watchdog.

And he had no idea how to change that or help him out of that.

He knew that people didn't take him seriously either. Because he was just Connor, the funny Irishman. The man with the guns. The saint. The newbie. So all he could do was to be there for Daryl. Trying to keep him sane. On the good side. Because he knew he was the only one who was capable of knew that Daryl had a soft spot for him by now. He also knew that his friend would never admit that.

Daryl returned two hours later and brought a doe with him. Connor snorted when he saw him and tried to help him with his prey.

"Nat a squirrel this time?" he teased him and Daryl snorted.

He laid the dead animal on the ground and looked at his friend. Connor didn't look so pissed any more.
He was grinning and trying to help, and the hunter knew that it was a peace-offering. For now.

He smirked and nudged his friend.

"Screw yah, still haven't seen yah bring a single thing."

"Oh I will. Just ye wait. Need help with the preparation?"

They placed the doe by the fire and Daryl laughed.

"As if yah know how t' do stuff like this. Being from Boston and Ireland."

"Fuck you, I know how t'do this shit. I've worked in a meat packin plant!" Connor protested and searched for his knife.

"Yeah I bet" Daryl answered and knelt down next to the doe.

Connor growled.

"Sure did! You don't know shit about me."

They spent the entire morning preparing the doe and getting it ready for the evening.
Connor had just left the tent in which he'd gotten changed when they saw Dale heading for their camp. Daryl was busy sorting his arrows when he saw him, too.

"The whole point of me coming up here is to get away from you people" he murmured and Connor greeted the old man with a nod.

He sat down and started cleaning his guns.

"Gonna take more than that" Dale said which made Connor smirk.

"Carol send you?" Daryl growled.

"Carol's not the only one that's concerned about you, your new role in the group" the old man said and Connor nodded.

"Aye, that's true."

Daryl turned around and eyed his friend who shrugged.

"What? He's got a point there."

The hunter rolled his eyes and turned his back on them.

"Man, I don't need my head shrunk. This group's broken. I'm better off fending for myself."

"No ye ain't" Connor said and Daryl pointed an arrow at him.

"You keep your trap shut now or yah can go back t'the group."

The Irishman sighed and shrugged. He just grabbed a smoke and lit it with a growl.

"You act like you don't care" Dale noticed after a while and

Daryl looked at him.

"Yeah, it's cause I don't."

He grabbed his vest and put it back on.

Why was everyone bringing that up now?

"So live or die, you don't care what happens to Randall?"

"Nope."

"Then why not stand with me, try to save the kid's life, if it really doesn't matter one way or the other?"

"Didn't peg you for a desperate son of a bitch" Daryl murmured as he adjusted his vest.

Dale turned his head and looked at Connor then. The Irishman chewed on his lower lip and took another drag on his cigarette.

"What about you then, Connor. I take it you're a righteous man?"

Connor sighed and scratched his neck.

"Aye but Rick's got a point. His group's dangerous. I ain't sayin killing him is right but...lettin him run ain't good either. I...just..ah fuck it.
I don' know what's right and what's wrong here anymore. What's te difference. Rick's got the say here. And they ain't listenin ta us anyway."

"Your opinion makes a difference."

Connor just looked at Dale for a while until they heard Daryl snort.

"Man, ain't nobody looking at me for nothing."

"I do" the Irishman said and his friend glared at him.

"Yeah cos I look like your stupid brother."

When Connor was just about to say something Dale interrupted him.

"Carol is, and I am. Right now. And you obviously- you have Rick's ear."

Daryl turned around because of this and frowned angrily.

"Rick just looks to Shane. Let him."

He grabbed his crossbow and turned around to leave when Dale wouldn't let it go.

"You cared about what happened to Sophia."

Connor looked up then as Daryl turned around again and just stared at Dale.

He knew that mentioning the little girl wasn't a good thing to do when his friend was around but the old man was right.
It was the only way to stop Daryl from running away again.

"Cared what it meant to the group. Torturingpeople? That isn't you. You're a decent man. So is Rick. Shane - He's different."

The Irishman was surprised to hear Dale say something like that. And he'd thought he was the only one who saw that there was more to Daryl than most people believed.
He looked at his friend and nodded.

"He's right man. You've changed. And nat fer te better. We're worried about ye."

Daryl rolled his eyes and ignored Connor. He looked at Dale instead.

"Why is that? Cause he killed Otis?"

The old man looked at him in surprise as Daryl approached him.

"He tell you that?" Dale asked and Daryl snorted.

"He told us some story...How Otis covered him, saved his ass. He showed up with the dead guy's gun. Rick ain't stupid.
If he didn't figure that out, it's cause he didn't wanna. It's like I said. Group's broken."

He turned around and left this time. Connor and Dale just looked after him for a while until the old man looked at the Irishman.

"You cannot tell me you're alright with this."

Connor sighed.

"I honestly ain't. If he were guilty I'd put a bullet ta his head without missing a heartbeat. No matter what Rick says.
Just... we don't know if he did shit just like the other members af his group. It's a tough decision that. Especially nowadays Dale."

"I thought you did everything you could to protect the innocent back in the old days. I mean they didn't call you a saint for nothing, did they?"

Connor looked at Dale then and frowned.

"Don't pull that on me."

"But we are talking about a man's life here!You might be the only one left in this group that knows what's right and human! You're a man of god!"

The Irishman got up then.

"Ye know what I did Dale? I killed a few people to prevent death af many, countlessinnocent people. Maybe that's just like that now. Maybe we need ta kill one person ta save the life af te many. I mean ye heard what he told us. It's 30 people, with guns and they're rapists and they kill people fer the fun af it. Maybe we have ta look past his innocence this time to save our lives!"

Dale looked at Connor in shock, who was just as surprised.

The Irishman sighed and sat down again.

"Why are you askin me anyway."

"Because I want to change Rick's mind. He gave me time to talk to the group. We're having a vote later this afternoon. So please, I'm begging you.
You're a man of god. You've read the bible more than once. You know what it says. Please help me save this kid's life?"

The Irishman looked at Dale for a very long while and then sighed.

"I'll think about it."

"Thank you. And please talk to Daryl as well. You're the only one he listens to."

Connor snorted.

"He doesn't do shit."