Yup. I went there.
Music, out. :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Percy Jackson and Olympians. Nor Cheerios. Or Lucky Charms.
C is for cake VS cereal
Apollo was not one for vegetables. Or oranges. Or nuts(except for cashews). Or cereal. Anything categorized as 'healthy' really.
He was one for cake though.
So, when Demeter walked into the Olympian equivalent of a living room, found Apollo pigging out on cake, and tried to make him eat cereal, he was not happy.
"No." He crossed his arms childishly, not caring at all how that made him look.
"Come on Apollo," she coaxed, "Just one bowl."
"No." Basically spitting in her face, he ate a piece of his chocolate cake.
"Apollo!" she cried, exasperated, "Cheerios are cholesterol lowering, healthy, and all-natural! What is cake next to that?"
Apollo blinked, not very sure what the goddess was saying. He only understood the last part. "Tasty."
Demeter threw her hands up, "Ugh! Why do I bother?"
Apollo shrugged, not at all bothered. "I don't know."
"Just one bowl?"
"No."
"Half a bowl?"
"Nuh-uh."
"One spoon?"
"...Maybe."
"One bite."
"What kind of cereal?"
"Cheerios."
"No."
Demeter wanted to scream. Why did this sorry excuse for a god hate cereal so much? Honestly, cereal was irresistible.
"Then what kind of cereal do you want, Apollo?"
Apollo contemplated it for a few seconds, "Lucky Charms."
Demeter's nose crinkled. That cereal? The one with way too much sugar and marshmallows?(I'm offended. Lucky Charms taste very good.) Well, if that's what it took to make Apollo eat cereal.
She waved her hand and the bowl of Cheerios was replaced by a colorful assortment of cereal and marshmallows overloadingTthe white landscape of milk.
Apollo grabbed the spoon and took a bite, making sure to get extra marshmallows. Halfway through chewing, he visibly choked and spit it out. All over Demeter.
...Oops.
She wiped off half-chewed bits with her hand, glaring at Apollo.
"Oops?" He asked weakly.
Demeter deliberately reached for Apollo's forgotten cake, and smashed it, plate and all, into his face. When she removed the porcelain plate, she admired her handiwork.
Apollo's face was an interesting mixture of chocolate cake and the vanilla that was inside, giving him an odd look, like a face someone made out of chocolate cake, but ran out halfway through and had to use vanilla.
His face was completely covered with sugary goodness. Almost. Only when Apollo opened his eyes did Demeter realize she hadn't gotten cake everywhere on his face.
She thought she did a pretty good job. His usually tan lips were chocolate. Literally. A soft peach color intermingled with dark, dark brown all over his cheeks and forehead, looking a bit like freckles. Apollo's chin was the color of fudge.
When he raised a cake eyebrow, she just smiled innocently. "Oops." She said, sweeter than the cake coating Apollo's face.
"I should have spit more cereal on you," He grumbled.
"Really?"
"Really." And with that, he reached over, got more cereal, spit it on her. Again.
Demeter shook her head, flinging most of the bits off. "You do know this means war, right?"
Apollo grinned, "Bring it."
Suddenly, Ares appeared out of nowhere. He looked around, "Who said war?"
Apollo snapped his fingers. A buffet table, that had not been there a few minutes ago, appeared and an army of cake, cakes from Double Fudge to Neapolitan, came with it.
Demeter waved her hand. The buffet table became even larger and cereal joined cake. Demeter even unbent a little to allow sugary cereals as well as healthy ones.
Ares cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled at a randomly picked direction. "FOOD FIGHT IN THE LIVING ROOM!"
Quicker than the Ares's echo could die, a dozen gods and goddess filed into the room.
What? Olympus gets boring every now and then.
According to the laws of nature(which were a little more than sexist)the male gods joined Apollo and his cake army, and the goddesses with Demeter and her cereal.
They armed themselves. Someone-Ares-let a cake fly. It hit Melpomene, the muse of tragedy, who was extremely temperamental. She pitched a bowl of cereal, covering Aether, a minor god.
As everyone exchanged food in a really intense way, Calliope, the muse of epic song, was furiously scribbling down on a note-pad. After all, this was epic as far as food fights went. Besides, Olympus had been a little short of epicness lately.
Eventually, the gods succeeded in their mission to take down Olympus's supply of cake and cereal, leaving over three dozen-more had joined during the fight-of immortals to sit on the floor, drowning in various cake bits, milk, and crushed cereal dust.
"Well," Apollo said lightly, picking himself off the floor. "That was fun."
He got a few groans and grins of agreement.
Finding it exciting and a time-killer, every year, the day before that same day, all immortals, minor and major, could be found baking until their fingers bled. The next day, April 24th, gods loaded down with pastries (really anything classified as food) marched over to their living room and threw food until there was no more food.
Thus, Food Fight Day was created.
This has to be the longest one yet. You have no idea how hard it was to write positively about healthy cereal and bash on tasty cereal...
How was it? Review!
If you have an idea for a letter, tell me. Through a review, PM me, whatever.
Music, out. :)