*Author's note: So all I will say is that I'm ditching the blog author's notes on here, BUT there's not much to say for this chapter. First of all, looks like you guys liked my twist! I'm so happy that the risk paid off! Anyway, its now time for you too see how far renegade Shep has come with his... erm renegadeness. And just to be clear, this is EVIL renegade not I'm still saving the galaxy renegade. This chapter might strike you guys as a little odd, but just bear with me you'll see how it all fits... I think. xD I always liked Shiala and wanted her to have more of a part in ME, and you will see that more part in the coming chapters.
Last chapter there was also a complaint about the spacing of the words and how its hard to read. I tried tweaking it a little, please tell me if this is better, and I will then apply this to all my pieces so they are all easier to read. Enjoy!
Remember, everything except the actual story belongs to Bioware, this story is part of a series of stories, the first being A Little Ship Lost in Space, and then this. For those that have stuck with me from the beginning, you are awesome! :D
O Shepard, what has happened to you?
Liara sat on the couch in the captain's quarters staring at a picture frame. The picture it contained was of Liara and Shepard together, holding hands and looking out onto the citadel. Shepard had once told her that as he went around the galaxy fighting the collectors, he had that frame display a picture of Liara, so that she was always there when he needed her.
And now it seems that the tables have turned.
Where can you be?
She looked at Shepard in the picture, almost asking the questions that popped up in her mind to it. She had checked the wreckage of the shuttles that Shepard had blown up. Shepard was nowhere to be found.
And why the shuttles? What purpose did that hold?
No one knew why Shepard had blown up the wreckage of shuttles, not when they were scheduled for demolition in a week. One theory was suicide. Liara knew in her heart that Shepard was alive, and that was enough for her to dispel that theory. This renegade Shepard would never do that either.
Maybe Shepard's mind is just more messed up than we all thought?
Liara hoped that it wasn't the case, but was all the more driven to finding Shepard. This different Shepard was alien to her. The old Shepard she knew by heart; from all his mannerisms to what side of the bed he preferred, to what flavors of ice cream he loved. But this one was privy to an outburst at the slightest disturbance, and cared only for himself.
But the Shepard I know is still there, just buried.
Liara heard the doors to the cabin open and several feet enter the room. She stood up, placing the picture frame back onto the coffee table where it had been previous. It was Garrus and Tali, holding hands as they approached Liara. Liara couldn't help but notice the hand holding, and longed for her own hand to hold. By that time they were talking to her already, and she snapped their voices into focus.
"-worried and so you're going to come with us for some fun." Garrus was saying.
Liara sighed. She sat back down.
"I won't be joining you."
"Liara, you're worried sick, we need to help you relieve some stress."
Liara stood up, assuming an aggressive stance. "THAT'S BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHERE THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE IS." She yelled.
Immediately she broke down and fell back down onto the couch. Tali approached the couch and sat down next to the crying asari.
"It's ok Liara. You know Shepard knows how to take care of himself."
"But not this different Shepard!" She sobbed.
Garrus sat down on Liara's other side.
"What do you mean, different Shepard?"
"Shepard's synthetics couldn't reject the nanites, and now they are slowly taking him over with a renegade self."
Tali cocked her head in confusion. "What nanites? Liara what are you talking about?"
Liara took a deep breath.
"When the Reapers tried to indoctrinate Shepard, Reaper nanites infiltrated his body to help the indoctrination process. When Shepard rejected indoctrination, his body rejected the nanites."
Tali raised a hand in understanding. "And his synthetics couldn't, resulting in a buildup of nanites at his synthetics."
Liara nodded. "But now instead of amplifying indoctrination, since there are no more reapers, they are amplifying his subconscious, and turning Shepard into a terrible renegade."
Tali put a hand up to her port.
"Keelah... and now you don't know where he is."
Liara could only nod as she held back tears.
"I have to find him and figure out some way to fix him."
Tali put a hand on her shoulder.
"We got your back Liara."
Garrus also put a hand on Liara's other shoulder.
"I might not understand all that technical stuff but if Shepard needs help, I'm in."
Liara smiled, something that she hadn't done in a while.
It was the only place where no one would think to look for him.
Why didn't I think to hide in the hospital in the first place?
Shepard walked around the quiet halls of Vancouver Memorial Hospital. He had watched Dr. Chakwas leave for the Normandy, and those other doctors make their ways to their homes and families. The rest of the doctors that were in the hospital at the time wouldn't know of his supposed issue. All was right as Shepard made his way to the food court of the hospital. Because of all the soldiers that were being treated, the food court was open 24/7, handing out food to those that needed it, and selling food to those that could afford it. Although the system was honor based, everyone was happy to help or be helped.
Shepard found a table and sat down. He was alone at it, but he didn't mind at all. There were times that it was nice to be alone. In the tables surrounding him, soldiers of all species chatted and shared stories. These were the survivors, the truly strongest and most skilled that each species had to offer. Those that claimed being lucky didn't realize that having good luck is a skill. Shepard wondered if anyone he knew was here.
"Commander Shepard, it is a surprise to see you here."
A familiar voice answered the question in his head. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw something green approach the table. Upon turning his head, he saw that it was Shiala, the green asari commando that he had saved from the thorian on feros.
"Long time no see." He responded. "And so much has happened."
"Might I sit?" She motioned to a vacant chair at his table.
"Of course you can."
She sat down.
"What is the great Commander Shepard doing here on Earth?" She asked, crossing both her arms and placing them on the table. "Don't you have the Normandy and the crew?"
"The reconstruction of Vancouver is what I'm doing. You'd think they'd want someone else to do it. I just wreck stuff."
Shiala laughed. "Well I could help, I've got some experience with the Feros colony."
"That won't be necessary, I'm quitting really soon."
"Why?"
"Head's just not in it anymore. I've got other things to worry about."
"Like what?"
Shepard surveyed her body language and disposition to him, remembering his previous encounters with her, he came to a conclusion. She wants me alright… That's good because Shepard gets what HE wants.
Shepard feigned a depressed look.
"Love just doesn't last now does it?"
Shiala expressed surprise and sympathy.
"I'm so sorry. Are you... are you ok?"
Shepard looked down.
"I just miss the company. I'm kinda on my own here."
Shiala looked away. "I know what you feel."
"What do you mean?"
"The Ferocious of Feros they called us. We fought with such ferocity and fluidity; we were the perfect fighting unit. We thought we were invincible..."
Her voice trailed off and she shook her head.
"What happened?"
"We must have made quite the scene back in London. A Reaper capital ship came down and wiped us all out with its laser. I was the only one left... I felt all their pain and suffering though. None of them died right away." She looked off in the distance, almost lost in the memory. "I used to be comforted by their thoughts and our connection, but now the silence that has replaced them is just... unbearable."
Shepard had gotten up and made his way to Shiala. He slid his arms around her.
"It's ok. We can be here for each other."
Eventually Shiala brought her arms around Shepard.
"What were your last words to me when we last spoke?" Shepard asked her.
"I was just trying to flirt with you commander. Something about when I'm not helping the feros colony and you not doing galaxy saving stuff." She answered. She looked away. "But that was a while ago."
"No it wasn't. Look at us now, both of us with no business to attend to..."
"Shepard, are you making a pass at me?"
"If I was, I'd do this." He kissed her on the lips. He parted slowly. "I want you." He whispered into her ear. Shiala smiled.
Both left the hospital together and they made their way to an abandoned building. The building itself was still stable, most of the frame was still present, however the inside was abandoned and empty. Shepard lead her inside. No words needed to be spoken. Both came together as their bodies intertwined. Shepard felt something savage develop inside him, and he let it out on Shiala. When Shepard was finished with her, a trembling Shiala melded minds with Shepard, as was customary for asari after sex.
Darkness approached from all sides until they were the only ones in a void of darkness. Shepard grabbed Shiala's hands and they stared into each other's eyes, savoring the moment. Shepard couldn't help but notice another Shepard off in the distance. He let go of Shiala's hands and made his was towards the other Shepard. Shiala followed suit.Shepard approached his other. As he did, he realized that he had morphed into the child that had tormented his dreams earlier.
"Are you happy now?" The Shepard began to yell. "I listened and look at all that has happened!"
"Things are only just turning around." Shepard answered.
"Turning around from what? I was happy!"
Shepard took a step back. The darkness gave way to the conference room at the hospital. Chakwas was standing and pointing at the real Shepard. In Dr. Morrow's voice, Chakwas spoke.
"Shepard, the mental trauma that you faced was enough to drive others literally insane. Your brain had to deal with it in some way. So it locked all that trauma away into your subconscious to be dealt with later as is the case in some people. What else was locked up in your subconscious were thoughts, notions, and decisions that you actively suppressed; in other words, due to your paragon actions, your renegade thoughts were locked up. The nanites needed some signal to amplify, and since the Reaper's signal was not present, they went to the next available thing, their host."
Liara was also present in the scene. She was facing the real Shepard.
"I know you're in there Shepard." She said, a tear running down her face as she stared into his eyes.
Shepard began to run in the other direction but slammed right into Shiala.
And they were back in their own minds. Shiala pulled away from Shepard.
"I know how it feels for your mind not to be your own." She looked out a broken window of the building. "But ditching your bondmate and seducing another asari is not the right thing to do."
Shepard laughed. "I'm done with her. She doesn't understand what I'm trying to become."
Shiala faced Shepard. "And what are you trying to become? No you're not done with her. The fact that she was there tells me she is not." She looked away, talking to herself. "How could I be so stupid!" Again she faced Shepard. "WHY DID YOU DO THIS? WAS I SOME FANTASY TO YOU?" Her biotics flared up and bits and pieces of rubble began shifting around randomly. Immediately she regained her composure. Shepard spoke before she could say anything.
"Maybe I wanted something more, something exotic."
Shiala sighed and looked away.
"Shepard, you need help... or maybe you're not the real Shepard. You should go back to the Normandy and find Liara."
"I will not. I don't need help."
Shiala shook her head.
"How can you be so blind? If you won't help yourself, I care enough to get you help." She began to make her way out of the building. But Shepard blocked her way out.
"Now you're not." Shepard challenged.
She told me herself that her biotics are unstable, and I can match her in hand to hand. I can take her.
He shoved her backwards. "Who would believe a crazy green asari that Commander Shepard has gone crazy?" He took a step forward. "I ought to teach you to know when to shut your mouth." He took another step, raising his fist. Shiala looked up helplessly on the ground.
"Shepard, look at what you are doing! Look at what you have become!"
Shepard looked away and brought his fist down. It pounded the ground right next to Shiala. He then swung his hand and pushed Shiala over.
"Next time, you're done."
He turned and sprinted out the door that Shiala had attempted to escape from. Shiala watched him leave, standing up and holding her hands to her belly. A tear ran down her cheek and she quickly rubbed it out.
"If only he knew what he had done." She muttered to herself before making her way out the building.
Liara's omnitool lit up to indicate that she had received a message. She had been talking to Garrus and Tali about the good old days when the Reapers terrified the galaxy and Shepard was sane. Before she checked the message, she gave Garrus and Tali an anxious look.
I told the agents, only a message if Shepard is spotted.
She opened the message.
Subject: ShepardAround 2216 hours at initial sighting. Shepard spotted leaving hospital with green asari, named Shiala. Spent most of the night in abandoned building. Shepard left in a hurry.
Liara scrolled down to see that there was a video attached. She played it, but hid it from the others. Moments later, Garrus and Tali watched Liara flare up in a biotic rage and throw the coffee table across the room onto the bed. She ran out of the room with a scream of anguish.
A scream of a lover scorned.