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Haymitch

After the interview replay, I walk Maysilee to her room. We don't talk at all. Just walking, that's it. Until I say goodnight, that is. I'm not sure if she heard me though. She seems kind of… I don't know… Distracted? I feel like she's drifting away from me. Then I go to my room.

I get back to my room and try to relax. It's hard. I know there is something going on with Maysilee. I wonder if I offended her in some way.

So I take a shower. Try to let the hot water calm my muscles. But that does not calm my brain. My mind is still thinking about her. She took her hand out of mine. She never does that. She didn't talk at all when I walked her to her room. She usually does. Did I offend her? Or maybe she realized that I really care for her, and doesn't feel the same. I don't know.

I get out of the shower and dress in some pajamas. I lie down in bed. That doesn't do me any good. I'm going to be up all night thinking about this unless I get some answers. So I find some slippers and head to her room.

I get to her door and am about to knock, when I think, what am I going to say? I don't know. Should I just wing it? Oh I know! I'll ask her to go to the roof with me! I knock on the door.

But what if she doesn't come? Uh oh. Now I'm having second thoughts. Should I run? Oh no, I hear her coming to the door. Darn it. What am I going to do?

She opens the door. "Haymitch, what are you doing here?" She asks. She's surprised to see me.

I take a deep breath. "Will you come up to the roof with me?" I finally get out.

"Ummm… I don't know…" She thinks about this for a minute. I am really starting to feel something eating at me. Fear? No. Anger? No. Hurt? Maybe. I don't know. "Ok." She finally says. I can tell she is reluctant. I don't really know what to think about that.

We walk up to the roof in silence. When we finally get there we go to the benches and sit, not talking for another few minutes. I don't know what to say. Well I could be blunt and just ask her what is wrong, but I just don't want to hurt her feelings.

"Maysilee…" I don't really know what to say.

She cuts me off. "Haymitch, I can't be in an alliance with you." She pauses, "You're my friend, now. I can't lose you and I can't kill you. What am I supposed to do?" She says. Her blue eyes are looking straight into mine. "I can't just stand by and watch you die, it wou-" I kiss her. I don't know what made me do it, but I did.

It was a magical feeling when our lips met. Electrifying. Then her lips felt warm and soft against mine. Amazing! When our lips part, I look at Mayilsee and see that she is very surprised by that kiss. I'm not sure if she is happy or upset about it. I blush and try to apologize.

"I'm sorry. That was stupid of me. I shouldn't have done that. And I honestly had no intentions of kissing you when I brought you up here… I darn it, I mean that wasn't planned… Oh how do I say this without being rude? I… I umm…" The next thing I know she kisses me. I guess my apologies were for nothing. She didn't mind the kiss!

I kiss her back eagerly. I'm seriously falling for this girl. She just makes me feel on top of the world. I wonder if she still doesn't want to be in an alliance with me. I'll ask her that later. This is a long, intense kiss. I like it. I put my hand on the side of her face and we keep with the long intense kiss for a while. Until we both need air. I want more but I just have to ask her.

"Maysilee?"

"Hmm." She responds

"I don't really want to ruin this moment, but I need to ask you something." I start.

"It's about the Games, isn't it?" She asks.

"Yeah… do you still not want to be in an alliance with me? I ask. I'm hesitant. I don't want to be rejected, but I can understand if she doesn't.

"No, what's the point? I don't want to spend another moment without you. I'd rather risk everything, than constantly be worrying about if you were okay or not. If every cannon shot was announcing your death. I want nothing more than to be in an alliance with you." She says. My heart soars. I am so unbelievably happy to hear this.

"Good, 'cause I don't want to spend another minute without you either. We need to figure out a way to find each other in case we can't meet up in the beginning or if we are split up." I suggest. I feel so much better now.

"You're right. What about a water source? Usually there are distinct ones in the arena. We'll constantly checks those when we can if we aren't together." She adds.

"Sounds great!" I pull her closer. There is nothing better than having her in my arms as we watch the sunset.

It's dark when we decide we should go back to our rooms. We walk holding hands, down the stairs and through the hall to her room.

She hugs me and says, "Stay safe tomorrow."

"Don't worry. Make sure you make it out of the Cornucopia alive, too." I can't stand it if she dies in the blood bath. That right there would probably kill me.

She kisses me again. A quick kiss, but still as overwhelming as the others.

As she opens her door, I head to my room. I turn and look at her for one last time for the night. Her blue eyes are sparkling with joy. I enter my room and lie on my bed thinking about the night.

The last thing I see before drifting into unconsciousness is Maysilee's face, smiling at me after our kiss.

Maysilee

Haymitch and I walk back to our rooms together after the interview recap. All the while see don't speak, which is odd for us. I wonder if he's hurt because I pulled back from him earlier today. I head into my room without saying a word to him.

I feel immensely sad. This isn't how I wanted my last interaction with Haymitch to go before the arena. But maybe it's for the best? Now that we seem to be drifting apart I won't have to be in an alliance with him in the Games. I couldn't stand to be allies with him just to end up being the last two people and then being forced to kill him or die myself. To be honest, I'm not sure what I would do in that situation. I'll always think about the good times we had together here and he's my friend. I can't kill a friend. But, on the other hand, I would love to return to my family. I'm glad the chance of this dilemma happening isn't a possibility now. I just saw Haymitch for the last time before the Games. There's no way we are going to be in an alliance now.

Just then there's a knock at my door. Who on earth could that be? I open the door and Haymitch is standing in the doorframe.

"Haymitch, what are you doing here?" I implore.

Haymitch takes a deep breath and asks me to go to the roof with him. I'm taken aback. We go from not really talking to him wanting to hang out on the roof? I don't know if this is a good idea. I don't want to get closer to him than I already am. It will just be that much harder if I lose him in the Games. But, maybe I can take this opportunity to tell him just that. So I finally agree and we make head up in silence.

Once we are on the roof Haymitch heads to the benches so I follow him and sit down on what seems to be our favorite bench; the one in front of the water fountain. I know I like it because the sound of the water soothes me. I wonder why Haymitch likes it?

I can tell Haymitch has something on his mind so I wait silently for a few minutes to allow him to gather his thoughts.

"Maysilee," he soon begins but seems to stop, still unsure of what to say. So, I decide to voice my thoughts.

"Haymitch, I can't be in an alliance with you." I think this is what he's been trying to ask me and I feel terrible rejecting him. "You're my friend now. I can't lose you and I can't kill you. What am I supposed to do? I can't stand by and watch you die, it wou-" he cuts me off…with a kiss. I'm so shocked that nothing registers in my mind until it's quickly over. I feel like a tornado of butterflies is flapping around in my stomach. I swear my heart stopped in that moment.

Haymitch seems embarrassed by my lack of response on the outside. He has no idea the fireworks of emotions raging through me right now. I'm so elated but scared at the same time. This is exactly what I didn't want to happen. I didn't want to become closer with him, now the Games will be unbearable. I can't stand the thought of watching this boy die before my eyes.

Meanwhile Haymitch is mumbling apologies to me, and he looks so cute sitting there obviously flustered and increasingly embarrassed as I'm still sitting still. And before I exactly realize what I'm doing I'm leaning in and this time I'm the one that's stopping a speech with a kiss.

It takes him a moment to realize what I just did and then he's passionately kissing me back. Who was I kidding? There's no way I can stay away from this boy. He's been slowing working his way into my heart this whole time. I've been naïve to deny it. I try to express my feelings towards him with this kiss. To let him now how much I care for him, and I think I succeed.

The only this that stops the kiss is our need for air. I feel so lightheaded and I can't seem to think straight. Plus I can't wipe the happy smile off my face. But I don't mind.

Haymitch pulls me close to him and I cuddle up next to him on the bench. So content in this moment, that not another thought is in my head besides us together right here right now. All thoughts of the Games and not wanting an alliance with him gone from my head.

After awhile Haymitch finally breaks the silence. "Maysilee?"

"Hmm?" I reply.

"I really don't want to ruin this moment but I need to ask you something." He responds.

"It's about the Games, isn't it?" I ask him.

"Yeah…do you still not want to be in an alliance with me?" He asks cautiously. He sounds kind of sad.

"No," I say softly. "What's the point, I don't want to spend another moment without you. I'd rather risk everything than to constantly be worrying about if you were okay or not. If every canon shoot was announcing your death. I want nothing more than to be in an alliance with you." I tell him, feeling the truth of this resonating within me as I speak.

He seems relieved and happy when he replies. "Good, 'cause I don't want to spend another moment without you either. We need to figure out a way to find each other in case we can't meet up in the beginning or if we are split up."

"You're right. What about a water source? Usually there are distinct ones in the arena. We'll constantly checks those when we can if we aren't together." I put it.

"Sounds great!" He tells me and he pulls me closer.

We stay holding each other for another hour before we are forced to acknowledge that we really have to go back to our rooms to get some rest if we want to ensure that we both make it through the first day.

When we're at my door I pull him close and hug him tightly. "Stay safe tomorrow." I whisper in his ear.

"Don't worry." He whispers back. "Make sure you make it out of the cornucopia alive too." He urgently tells me.

"I will." I say as I pull back from the hug but still hold his hands.

I rise up on my tiptoes while I still cling to his hands and plant a light kiss on his lips.

I smile into the kiss and then turn and start to open my door. I turn back around and see him heading down the hall to his room. As he reaches his door he looks back and looks me in the eyes. I see such strong emotions in them that it pains me to finally look away and close the door.

I have strong emotions coursing through me as well and it's these emotions that pull me to a desk in my room that contains a pen and some paper in its drawers. I sit down and begin to write Haymitch a letter. He won't see it before the Games. I'm going to give it to Rosale to give to Haymitch if he wins. I pour my heart out into this letter, hoping that he will be able to read it one day.