Well fuck me sideways! I actually got off my lazy ass to write something over Christmas break! IT'S A CHRISTMAS MYRICLE!

I should have probably given credit to princess-of-all-sayins for writing a teeny tiny bit of my last chapter…probably (she bitched at me about it T_T). So there you go sis! Happy now?

I don't own Hetalia…or Pringles…

Story start!

It was 7:30 in the morning and Germany had just stumbled down the stairs to make himself some breakfast. No sooner had he turned on the Mr. Coffee machine then he heard a strange gurgling noise come from the living room. At first he simply dismissed the noise as his imagination…then the noise happened again, but with an 'eh ha' at the end, and a rustling noise.

"Vhat the…Italy! Have you snuck in again!" there was no answer.

Germany cautiously walked over to his silverware drawer and pulled out his pistol (why he had it there, we'll never know) and started tip-toeing into the living room. He was sure the noise had come from the couch.

Quietly, he peered over the couch to see…a crumpled up blanket? He stood to his full height and looked around the rest of the room. Empty.

"Veird." he said, lowering his gun slightly.

"Morning Germany!"

"WAAAAAAHHHHH!"

He rounded on the mysterious voice, firing every round in the gun as he did so…with his eyes closed.

He opened his eyes to a destroyed living room. There were two broken windows, several holes in the walls, and one bullet must have hit a pillow or something, because feathers were raining like fucking snow. Oh, and there was also a headlight that was barely hanging by a thin cord, occasionally shooting out safe looking sparks (sarcasm on safe looking). Kenzie was in the middle of said mess, in the fetal position on the ground. When she looked up, she was obviously pissed.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? You could have just killed me you sausage sucking bitch! HOW CAN YOU TREAT YOUR GUEST LIKE THIS?" Kenzie was red in the face, spitting a bit as the chewed out the slowly recovering German.

All Germany could do the entire time was stare at the enraged girl and try to regain his normal breathing pattern. Eventually his blood pressure lowered enough for him to speak.

"W-why are you in my house?" he said, still panting slightly.

"Duh! Everyone seems to crash at your house in the series!"

"Um, series?" Kenzie ignored his question and continued.

"So I decided I would live with you. :3" she finished.

Germany just stood there and stared at her with one of those vein thingies throbbing on his temple.

Calm down! She's just a strange little shit who nearly gave you a heart attack. Germany thought.

"Do I not get a say in this?" he said through gritted teeth.

"Nope. :D" was Kenzie's only reply.

"Why you litt-"

"IS THAT COFFEE!"

While all the drama had happened, Germany's coffee had finished brewing in the kitchen, and Kenzie had gotten a big 'ol sniff of it.

"Huh? Yes, but before anything we need to discuss what just happened…" Germany would have said more, but Kenzie was already halfway to the kitchen to get her some coffee.

"Bitches don't listen." he mumbled as he slowly followed.

By the time Germany got to the kitchen about five seconds later, Kenzie had already poured herself a cup of coffee the size of her head and was happily slurping away.

"Um…" Germany said, noticing the girl was drinking the coffee plain. "Don't you want some sugar or milk or something?"

"No thank you!" Kenzie chirped innocently. "I like my coffee like I like my men. :3"

"…plain and bitter?"

"Hehe. No, silly. BLACK AND STRONG!" Kenzie shouted that last part.

Germany choked slightly on his own coffee at the girls statement.

"You okay, Germany?" Kenzie said, patting his back. "Burn your tongue?"

Germany put his head in his hand and sighed loudly.

"Yeah. Think you could pour this down the drain? Suddenly I don't feel like coffee anymore. -_-" he said. His headache only got worse as Prussia walked in to the kitchen.

"Yo West! What's up with all the noise down here? I've only ever heard screaming like this when Spain gets Romano in bed."

"Bruder! To much information!" Germany said, a deep blush covering his face.

Kenzie just scooted closer to Prussia. "Go on."

"Gah! This is to much!" Germany said, standing from the table. "I'll be in my office. If anyone needs me, please hesitate to ask for help." he stormed up the stairs to his office and slammed the door shut behind him.

"Psh. What a tight ass." Kenzie mumbled.

"Yeah. West's been trying to get his paperwork done before Christmas. But he could seriously be a little more awesome about it."

"Wait Christmas?" Kenzie said in a surprised tone. "But Christmas is, like, forever away!"

"Do you even know what month it is?" Prussia asked.

"…February?" yeah…she didn't have a clue.

"Totally un-awesome. -_-"

"What? Was I wrong?"

Prussia sighed. "Lucky for you, the awesome me knows the real date. It's actually December. And Christmas is two days away." he said in an all-knowing tone.

"…so, that means…" Kenzie started, then trailed off. She sat like that for two hours, not saying a thing. Prussia eventually left and watched some TV.

Suddenly, out of no where Kenzie screamed, "I HAVN'T STARTED MY CHRISTMAS SHOPPING!" in the blink of an eye, she was out of the house, wallet in hand. Prussia jumped so high at her outburst that he hit his head on the dangling light.

"Verdammt! Son as an old ass!" he screamed clutching his head once he landed.

"What was that she said?" he mumbled once he calmed down a bit.

*several hours later*

Kenzie walked through the door with a victorious smile on her face.

"I'm back." she hollered.

"Uuuuuug." came a pain filled reply from the living room.

Kenzie followed the moan to find Prussia looking very miserable with an ice pack on his head.

"Dear Lord, man? What the heck happened to you?" Kenzie asked.

"I was startled by someones loud voice and hit my head." Prussia said, glaring slightly. Kenzie didn't pick up on what he was hinting.

"To bad for you! Hey, can you tell me where a shovel is in this place?" Kenzie asked.

"A shovel? Why?" asked Prussia.

"I need to…bury something…something no-one can ever find." all humor or happiness was gone form Kenzie's voice. And her eyes had a dark aura behind them. Prussia was terrified.

"T-t-there's one in the garage! Beside the light switch!" he said, desperately trying to keep his frightened tears from spilling.

Kenzie immediately started smiling again like nothing had ever happened.

"Thank you Prussia! Oh! And don't look out the window until I come back inside." with that, she merrily skipped out of the house. Prussia just sat on the couch for a few minutes, to afraid to move, before slowly crawling over to the window and peeking outside. What he saw made his stomach lurch.

There was Kenzie dragging a body bag across the yard, occasionally looking around to make sure no-one was watching her.

"WEST!" Prussia shrieked before sprinting up the stairs to inform his brother of what he had just seen.

*one explanation later*

"You're absolutely sure that's what you saw?" Germany asked for the hundredth time.

"West! That chicks a crazy murderer! What else would she be doing with a fucking body bag and a shovel! She killed someone, and we'll be next if we don't do something now!" Prussia argued.

"Bruder, I'm sure there's a better explanation than homicide." Germany argued back.

"But-" the Germans went quiet when they heard the front door open then close.

"Great. Now we can settle this once and for all." Germany said. He stood and walked out of his office, closely followed by Prussia.

The two brothers made it halfway down the stairs before stopping dead in their tracks. There stood Kenzie, shovel in hand, covered from head to toe in dirt, and looking like a super crazy mad woman.

They just stood there, watching, before slowly walking back up the stair and locking themselves in Germanys office.

"I TOLD YOU!" Prussia scream-whispered.

"Just calm down! I'll call the police!" Germany picked up the phone and was just starting to dial the first number when the lights in the room flickered, and eventually went out altogether.

"What's going on!" mumbled a terrified Prussia.

"I-I'm not sure, but I think-"

A loud banging came from the door followed by Kenzie's voice.

"Hey, guys. The power just went dead. Will you two come out and show me where some candles are or something."

"Don't do it!" Prussia whispered to Germany, "The power won't be the only thing to die if we go out there to her!"

"Well it's not exactly like we can just ignore her." replied Germany. "Besides, while she's lighting candles, we can make a run for it."

Prussia's eyes went wide with understanding. "Got it! We're commin chick."

The Germans stuck to their plan and showed Kenzie where the candles were so she could light the house, all the while secretly stepping closer to the door.

"Hmmm. I think bruder and I should step outside for some fresh- NOW PRUSSIA, NOW!" Germany yelled as the two sprinter the remaining two steps to the door, fiddling with the doorknob.

"Hey, I wouldn't do that if I were-" Kenzie never got to finish her sentence because the men were able to open the door, only to be buried in an avalanche of snow.

"Vhat the hell!" yelled Germany, as he finally managed to dig himself out of the snow.

"We got snowed in." stated Kenzie.

"I can see that." said Prussia, who's head had just popped out of the snow.

"Well, guess this means we're all stuck inside the next few days." said Kenzie.

Both Germans took on 0_X faces.

And so, the next two days flew bye with the nations avoiding the human as if she were Mel Gibson.

*Christmas day*

"I can't do it anymore, West." Prussia panted. "This house is just too small to keep her from finding us."

"Prussia, we can't be talking like tha-" suddenly, the door to the room came crashing down. Both men gave a startled scream. A wide-eyed Kenzie came running into the room.

"Have to get out! Have to get out! Need to dig it up!" she mumbled.

"SHE'S LOST IT!" Prussia yelled.

"I-I-I!" Kenzie fell to the floor, sobbing like an Italy without pasta. Germany and Prussia would have ran for it if she weren't still in the doorway. "I'm so sorry." Kenzie mumbled the last part.

Germany and Prussia gave each other confused looks, before Germany spoke up.

"Why'd you do it, McKenzie?" he asked.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" she snapped before continuing. "I-I didn't mean to. And I figured no one would look for presents und-"

"PRESENTS?" both men screamed, thoroughly confused. Kenzie wiped her eyes.

"Y-yeah." she sniffed before continuing. "I figured you two would never look for them underground. So I buried them. But now…I-I-I…I FORGOT WHERE I BURIED THEM!" she promptly broke down into tears again.

"Buried presents? '-_-" Germans asked, more to himself than to the hysterical Kenzie.

"Like a squirrel? '-_-" Prussia asked later.

The two men looked at each other. After a few minutes neither of them could keep a strait face anymore and burst out laughing (yes, Germany laughed too). Kenzie just looked at them like they were crazy.

"W-what's so funny?" she managed to ask. "Aren't you guys angry that I lost your stuff?"

"I'm sure we'll be able to get over it…though I do expect you to dig that stuff out of my yard once the snow melts." Germany said.

"Yeah. What West said." Prussia added.

"Okay then."

Later that the day, the snow melted enough for everyone to get out of the house and go eat Chinese food.

The end!

Merry Christmas everyone! And a happy new year. REVIEW PLEASE! C: