Making It Alright

The sun heated me up as I walked the barren field that led up to Mother Gana's cabin. Now, I wasn't afraid to talk to her like I had before the incident (I'm too ashamed to admit that I tried to commit suicide, so for now on, it's "the incident").

I could see a small brown shape in the distance. Good, I was getting close to her cabin. I hoped she liked the plan I thought of. I thought about after I left the lake. It took me sometime to actually come up with a good idea, but it eventually got to me what I needed to do. I just hope Mother Gana liked it.

Eventually, I hit the dirt road that swirled up to Mother Gana's shack. Smoke rose from the shaky chimney. It occurred to me that I had never been inside her house before. I wonder what it was like. Was it as bad on the inside as it was on the outside? How did it smell? Like strawberries? Oh now, Jani, don't make yourself giggle. It probably smelled like earth, but the nice rich earth that one would smell in a garden, not the kind you would smell on a slum street in India (personal experience).

Midway to the house, I stopped. A brown figure stood before the house. A worn-out blue shawl was wrapped around her as she knelt down and dug up holes to plant seeds in. A full-leafed tree stood beside her house in the winter afternoon. Six flowers sat firmly on it.

Taking, a deep breath, I looked to the Spirit. "Mo . . . . Mother Gana!"

Mother Gana stopped digging. She looked up slowly and squinted in my direction.

I waved. "Mother Gana!" I called again.

She dropped the dirt in her hand. "Jani!" she called from her spot. She jumped up and began to run towards me.

I ran to her too. We collided, and hugged each other tight, as if we were mother and daughter who haven't seen each other in years. I felt a tear rolled down my cheek. She wasn't mad at me. Oh thank God she wasn't!

"Oh Mother Gana," I sobbed. "I'm so sorry! I'm sorry I released the evil spirits! I'm sorry I disobeyed you! I'm sorry I tried to end myself! I'm just sorry!"

Pressing my face into her stomach, I inhaled her rich scent of flowers. It was a calming and sweet. Sort of like Mother Gana.

I felt Mother Gana's hand rub against my back in a comforting way. Something wet dripped on my head, and for a second I thought it was raining. I looked up to her face. My mouth dropped. Mother Gana was crying.

We knelt down to the ground, still clinging to each other. "Jani," she said through tears. "Oh darling, you have nothing to feel sorry about. It is I who should be asking for your forgiveness." She petted my long black hair. "It took me a day to realize that I was . . . wrong. It's only natural for you to want to know the answer to your questions, and that I had no right to suppress such urges. I tried to track you down, but your spirit was so low I couldn't. Then last night, I sensed nothing of you. I haven't felt that much dread and regret since . . . ."

"Since you changed Sol?"

My response took her by surprised. She nodded. "Yes. I felt like your disappearance was my fault, that I was responsible for losing one of the most important things to the Spirits. I felt like I had failed."

She hugged me tight like a teddy bear. I hugged her tighter. "But you didn't," I whispered.

She sniffed. "But I almost did. You must understand Jani . . . . Even Spirits get scared of losing something they care about."

I looked into her black eyes. They were soft, yet so powerful I was about to cry again. I stood up, my shoulder back and chin high. "I was stupid and foolish. I thought as I had been defeated, but there was one thing that had escaped me."

Mother Gana stood up. She nodded for me to go on.

"I am a half-Spirit. Human blood runs through my veins, but a Spirit's powers run through my entire body. Many lives ago, I had a Spirit parent, who may or may not know that their half-human child lives through me. Surely, if none of my other lives had given up on life, then why should I?"

I almost brought tears to my eyes whiling saying this little speech. There was something inside me, something powerful. I could feel it building inside me, making me stronger.

Mother Gana placed a hand on my shoulder. "I had many doubts when I first triggered your powers." She smiled. "Now, I have no doubts, but full hope that you are the one that can help us."

I smiled. We hugged again. This time, we hugged more like best friends than a sorrowful mother and daughter. Yes, I had Mother Gana's support back. No even better that, I had Mother Gana back.

We sat down on her porch of her house. As a celebration of my return, Mother Gana made the strawberry tea that she fed to me the day I came to her house. It was still as good as the day I first tasted it.

"There's trouble Jani," Mother Gana said, before taking a sip.

I quickly sipped my tea. "What kind of trouble."

"There are only two kinds of troubles to Spirits," Mother Gana explained. "And that is humans and-"

"Evil spirits?"

She nodded. I could already guess which kind of trouble it was. "Is it my fault?" I asked.

Mother Gana stopped sipping the tea. She placed the cup on the tray. "I wouldn't blame you. If you didn't let them out, someone else would've. That night on the battle, we lost a lot of Spirits, but we defeated even more evil spirits. Though some got anyway nevertheless. And we fear that they may have gotten into this world."

I gasped.

"You should be afraid." Her face turned serious. "Evil spirits have no mercy. They are greedy, greedier than humans. Their presence in this world will only cause chaos and destruction."

My cup slipped from my hands and splattered to the ground, breaking into a million pieces. My thoughts suddenly went to my loved ones. My parents, Mary, the clans. I'm sure they were vulnerable to evil like children were to pedophiles. No, I had to protect them!

"Mother Gana, I must go!"

I jumped from my spot, about to sprint back to my house, but something grabbed a hold of my wrist. It was Mother Gana.

"Jani no!" There was a pleading sound in her voice and in her eyes.

I struggled as I tried to pull out of her grasp, but her skinny form deceived me, for she had a grip of a god. "No! I have to save my friends and family!"

"You'll cause more misery to them if you do go to them!"

I stopped resisting. "What?"

"The evil spirits want to know of the half-Spirit that set them free. They find you a threat Jani. And they'll harm anyone close to you to make you weaker and get closer to you. Jani, your loved ones will be in terrible danger if you go them."

Shock consumed me like a tidal wave. I was pretty much number one on the evil spirits' hit list. And now I had put everyone I love into danger.

"What about the clans?" I asked. "Are they in danger when I'm near as well?"

"Not exactly. You're not the only powerful thing living around that lake Jani. With your powers, the powers of the others, the evil spirits will see to it as just another group of Spirits. But you can no longer stay with the humans you once did before. It's too dangerous."

I titled my head. "So . . . . I can never see my parents again?"

Mother Gana shook her head. "I'm so sorry Jani, but they will die a horrible death if the evil spirits find you there with them."

Tears began to roll down my face. I remembered a baby video I would watch sometimes. It was a video of when I was a baby, about seven months old. I was wrapped up in a little pink outfit my grandmother had sent from India. There were tiny anklets around my ankles. Mama was playing some Indian music on the CD player. I danced happily, clapping my hands, and moving my jingly feet. Mama, then a young and beautiful seventeen-year-old, then picked me up and threw me in the air. As she twirled around with me in her arms, her white and red sari made her look like an angel. Papa then put the camera down and then held me, Mama picking up the camera. Papa played peek-a-boo with me, then swooped me into my arms, tickling my stomach. I punched the air with my little chubby fists and feet, letting out cute little baby laughs. It was during these times, whiling watching this video, it would actually occur to me that my parents really did love me. They did, with all their hearts. And until this moment, the moment where I knew I would never see them again, did I realize I loved dearly them too.

I fell at Mother Gana's side, crying (something I've seem to be doing a lot of this week). Mother Gana wrapped a comforting arm around me. "Oh child. We Spirits don't have family-with the exception of those who have created half-Spirits-but we certainly sympathize in your pain." She looked into my eyes. "You may say good-bye to you parents, but not face to face. If the evil spirits come for them and get a scent of you off of them, they'll kill them immediately. You must say good-bye to them in under ten minutes."

I nodded. "Can I write them a note?"

"Yes. A note is fine, just don't give it to them face-to-face."

I hugged Mother Gana. "Thank you."

She smiled. "No need to thank me. Now go, you must come back to my house by sunset."

"Why?"

"Tonight's a full moon, that's when evil spirits are they're most powerful. Spirits shouldn't leave their homes on full moons because we are at our weakest."

I nodded. Walking away from the house, I formed a paper and pen in my hand and began to write my good-bye letter. It'll be the last thing I would ever write to my parents.

I taped the folded letter to the front door of my house. I was timing the minutes in my head of when ten minutes was up. So far, I had nine minutes left.

Ringing the doorbell, I jumped from the stairs and hid in the thick bushes that were in front of my house. Mama answered the door. She looked around curiously as to who rang the bell. That's when she noticed the note tapped to the door. She snatched it quickly and shut the door as she went back in the house.

I placed my hand on the wall. In my head, I was able to see and hear everything in my living room. Papa was on the couch, looking at a photo album. My baby pictures! I can't believe he still looked at them.

Mama waved for my papa to come. Papa nodded to the note. "What's that?"

"Jani," Mama answered. "A note from Jani."

Papa's eyes widened. "Are you sure?"

She nodded. She pointed to Mama+Papa scribbled on the folded paper. "It's Jani's handwriting." She looked at it for a minute. Then she sniffed. "Jani always had such pretty handwriting."

Papa looked at his wife. "You say that as if she's dead!"

Mama wiped her eyes. "Well let's see if she is." She franticly opened the note. She read it aloud to Papa.

"My loving Mama and Papa,

Yes is this your daughter Jani. I can only imagine how thrilled you must be by reading this. Which is why my heart breaks into a million pieces as I write this: I can never see you again. Mama, Papa, please don't cry. Crying won't bring me back. Nothing can unfortunately. I wish I can explain to you why I can never see you again, but I can't. I just can't. But please, always know that I love you too so much that there is no way I can possibly write it. You sacrificed to give me what other children like me couldn't have, and I will always be grateful for that, and I hope someday, I can somehow repay you. Mama, Papa, I love you. Always have and always will. Good-bye . . . . forever. Promise me, I'll never leave your hearts. You'll never leave mine.

May Brahma, Vishnu, and Shiva bless you both,

your loving only daughter,

Jani"

Mama fell into Papa's arms crying her eyes out. Papa too had big tears falling down his face too. I took my hand away from the wall. I couldn't bear to watch this. My heart just couldn't take it.

Walking away from the home I had known since birth, I blew a kiss to it. Golden sparkles flew from my hand as I blew my kiss. "Good-bye Mama." I blew another kiss. "Good-bye Papa."

I began to walk away. "There will always be a place for you in my heart . . . . always."

The giant white walled and iron roofed mansion that stood on three acres of property, didn't seem larger than life to me. That's because there was a demon that lurked inside it. And her name was Ellen Wilson.

The bitches' parents worked for companies that based everything on appearances. Her father, a CEO of some kind. Her mother, a designer for some fashion company. Given these two facts, I think I had the perfect type of punishment for this bitch.

It was a good two hours before sunset, so I had time to spare. My first thought was to somehow get Ellen outside where I can punish her, then I thought, if I was gonna punish her and freak the hell out of her, why not do it the old-fashion Spirit way?

I had been practicing transporting for a while now, and I think I've pretty much got it. Taking a deep breath and clearing my mind, I pictured a room, and Ellen standing in it. I felt light for a few seconds. When I opened my eyes, I was standing in an all huge white room, with a giant queen-sized bed with blue quilts that had EW written in fancy script. I wonder if Ellen ever realized her entails spelt EW? The dragon girl was probably too self absorbed to realize such a thing.

Footsteps entered the room, along with the sound of some girl talking on the cellphone. "No Carissa, I'm almost one hundred percent sure she killed herself . . . . . Well then how else could you explain her disappearance? . . . . . . Anyway, she's dead. Like finally, the fun's over. Meanwhile, I heard Julie Chong is pregnant . . . . . I know! It's that-"

Ellen let out a loud, high-pitched shriek when she saw me standing in the center of her room. She turned and sprinted for the door, but I thought quicker. Lifting my hand, I made the door shut, and lock so only I could open it.

I walked over to the cellphone Ellen had dropped and picked it up. I could still hear someone from the other line. My thumb pressed the "end call" button on the Blackberry. I shrugged. "I guess you'll have to call them back."

Ellen charged towards me, but I was quicker and pressed against the wall, sending her into a white leather couch in her room.

I held out my hand, and wiggled it rendering Ellen to be stuck to her couch until I freed her. She squirmed, kicking her legs and screaming. I rolled my eyes. What a baby.

"Fine!" Ellen screamed. "Kill me you demons freak! But my daddy has a lot of lawyers, and they'll find you and throw you into some prison. Or would you rather they deport you back to India or wherever the hell you came from! How would you like that brownie?"

Hoy crap, I really wanted to slap this bitch. No, no. I had something better in mind.

I walked up closer to her. Despite her kicking, I could see her trembling. She was scared. Oh man, this was just too good.

"You see Ellen," I said, adding major attitude on the bitch's name. "Killing you would not solve anything. You'll just be gone, all your victims left unsatisfied. Nah, killing you would be more like a gift." I smiled, trying to copy off that smile Mother Gana gave me the night she triggered my powers. "However, I figured this might do the trick."

Ellen raised a trembling brow. "W-What might that be?"

I did the smile again. Well, here it goes. "Since you made everyone look and think of me as something I wasn't, I shall do the same so you."

She laughed. "Ha! You're gonna spread nasty rumors about me? Go ahead. I'll have you crying out of this-out of this country in no time."

"That's not exactly how it's gonna work out."

I wiggled my fingers. Purple light beamed off them, and then flashed on to Ellen, showering her in a purple glow. Damn I wish I had a camera. Her face was petrified in sheer horror.

The purple light soon faded. Ellen looked around. Before she could laugh or say a smart-ass remark, I held up a mirror to her face. She furrowed her brows in confusion. "I look the same. Beautiful, gorgeous, like a queen."

Now it was my turn to laugh. "You truly are naïve. This is what you'll see, the true you. However . . ." I snapped my fingers. "This is what everyone else will see."

Ellen's scream was louder the scream she had made when she saw me in her room. In the mirror, she was a haggard old woman's face. Her skin was grey and wrinkly beyond belief, sagging for inches. Her hair, the six strands that hung from her bald head, was thin and grey. She looked like a hideous witch. A monster. Now she was truly what she was.

I wiggled my fingers which let her go from the couch. Ellen ran up to her body-length mirror, and examined herself. Her skin was so flabby, it was almost like a cloak on her. And rising from her back, a hump as big as her head.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!" Ellen screamed with all her might.

I smiled slightly. "You made people believe that I was a whore and many other horrible things that I certainly was not. No one believed me when I tried to tell them the truth, expect for myself. Now you will know what it feels like to be looked at as something you're far from." I raised my hand to mirror. "You know that you're far beautiful than this, but nobody will see you as it. They'll look at you and think you walked right out from a horror film."

Ellen began screaming again. She ran around her room crazy, throwing things, kicking stuff, knocking over furniture, tearing up her pillows and quilt on her bed. Her madness raved on, and I watched. Finally, she broke down on the fly, both crying and screaming, curled in a ball like a crazy person.

I unlocked the door. Looking at Ellen, I added one more thing. "And because you still won't learn your lesson, you shall remain this way for eternity. Nothing of man can kill you. You're permanently this way forever!"

Swishing my hand, I dissolved in the air, leaving a now horrid-looking Ellen sobbing and screaming on the ground, and her parents yelling their heads off, as they shouted at the monster what had she done with their daughter.

I returned to Mother Gana's house a good twenty minutes before the sunset would set. The Spirit stood on her porch, leaning against the wooden railing. A warm, welcoming smile was bright on her face. She nodded at me as I walked up the dirt path.

"Have you done everything?"

"Yes," I answered.

She tapped her chin with her index finger. "Then why do you look like something else is bothering you?"

I shuffled my feet a bit. "Well, you see, I went to go say good-bye to a close friend of mine, Mary. But she wasn't at her house, and I have no idea where she is. I just really wanted to say goodbye."

To my surprise, Mother Gana was smiling. She held up a finger, gesturing for me to wait a moment, and went inside her shack. A moment later, she returned, with a redheaded girl standing beside her.

I gasped loudly and ran to my best friend. I squeezed her so tight I thought she might pop. "Mary! Mary! Mary! Mary!"

"That's my name," Mary joked. She looked at me. "It's good see you're safe Jani."

I suddenly looked to Mother Gana. "But how in the world-"

"Perhaps I should explain," she interrupted. "It was about one hundred years ago, I had come up with an idea for Spirits to blend more naturally with the humans. I suggested that maybe, we should send Spirits disguised as families. You know? An average family, with a mother, father, sister, and brother. The idea was good, and we actually got a few families to come down here." She tapped Mary. "Your friend here was one of the first Spirit families to be spent into this world."

I looked at Mary wide-eyed. "Mary. You're a-a . . . ."

"Spirit?" She winked. "Correct, and your grand prize is this lollipop."

I giggled. "But how could I have never have known? I mean, sure the Wiccan thing was a bit off, but I mean your whole family being Spirits? You guys were too . . ."

"Normal?"

I nodded shyly. "Yeah . . . that."

Mary laughed. "Well, we've been at this for like what? A hundred years. I've rather enjoyed it. Being a young teenage girl, it's been fun."

A warm feeling fluttered in my stomach. My best friend was a Spirit? Now there were no more surprises.

The setting sun was drawing near. Mother Gana explained to me how it would work out from here.

"Being in your human form isn't probably a smart idea. The evil spirits are probably looking for a human. You're much safer being a cat than you are human."

"But then . . . does that mean I can never me human again?"

"Of course not," Mary said with a smile. "Eventually, we'll teach you how you can transform from your cat form to your human form in the blink of an eye."

"Wait, so, I can be both?"

The Spirits nodded.

"Yes," Mother Gana said. "But for the time being, I'm going to make you walk around in your cat form, so by day and night now, you will be a cat."

I smiled. "Does this mean, I get to stay with the clans twenty-four-seven?"

Mary nodded. "They're your new home now."

"Of course now at night, you must visit us so we can teach your more about your powers," Mother Gana explained. "That shouldn't be too hard. You only need a couple hours of sleep a week, and now that you've mastered transporting, you should be able to travel to and from the clans with no problem."

I nodded. "Yeah no problem at all." I smiled. "I'm ready whenever you are."

Mary gave me a quick squeeze.

She stood next Mother Gana. They both swished their hands up and down. A glowing white light formed and basked on me. I could feel the familiar transforming into a cat that's I've been feeling for the past few months.

Mother Gana knelt down to me. She gave me a motherly kiss on my head. "Good luck Jani."

I shook my head. "No. Jani was my human name from my human life, a life that is now forgotten. My name for this new life is Violetmoon."

Mary and Mother Gana bowed their heads.

"Very well," Mother Gana said. "May the Spirits be with you . . . Violetmoon."

A/N: Whoop! Whoop! Yeah baby! Violetmoon in da house! Thank you for the lovely reviews and stay tuned for the next chap-

Mother Gana: Hello Enyo.

Me: What the? Mother Gana what the hell are you doing here?

Mother Gana: I thought I join you in your author's note.

Me: Why?

Mother Gana: You seem lonely.

Me: . . . . . . . . Damn.

Mother Gana: To help cure Enyo's loneiness, review please! We Spirits will be thankful.

Me: I'm not lonely!

Mother Gana: Yes you are.

Me: No I'm not!

Mother Gana: Yes you are.

Me: No I'm not!

Mother Gana: We can go all day with this.

Me: Bring it! I don't start school til Friday. No I'm not!

Mother Gana: Yes you are . . . .