Chapter Fifteen:
The next day Vivian and I made a point to find Steve first thing. He was in the gym giving a punching bag what for and he didn't notice us come in until he sent the punching bag flying across the room,
"Now what did that poor ol bag ever do to you?" I asked grabbing Steve's attention and when he turned around I almost forgot my 'make Steve relive his chorus line days' plan.
His t-shirt was stuck to his body and showing off the well defined muscle underneath. It was only when Vivian started humming his theme music that I remembered why we were down here,
"I didn't hear you guys come in" Steve said picking up a punching bag to replace the one he'd killed,
"No you were busy killing a punching bag" I laughed as Vivian's humming got louder. Steve finally noticed,
"What's that you're humming?" He asked warily although I was sure he already knew,
"Why it's your theme music darlin" I said seriously, "don't tell me you forgot about all those pretty dancing girls or your fabulous film star days"
"Where did you find that footage?"
"Well Viv's a star hacker. Not even Stark's security could keep her out" I explained, "and well there was some stuff Stark's Daddy had collected on you and your amazing dancing girls were part of that information"
"That was a long time ago" Steve started
"Oh don't worry it's not like I'm jealous of some dancing girls. Of course you aren't likely to live this down" I laughed, "The Star Spangled Man with a plan. I have to admit it is a catchy tune"
"It's your ringtone right?" Vivian asked
"That it is. I even have your part" I said to Steve "your best guys gun? Who wrote that claptrap?"
"It was either a dancing monkey or a lab rat" Steve said, "I chose dancing monkey"
"Then solider of course. I got a look at your record too. Not just your chorus line days"
Vivian was about to say something when Fury walked through the doors of the gym,
"Just the girls I wanted to see"
"I don't like the sound of this" Vivian said immediately
"Me either"
"Apparently our guest was rather taken with Miss Rose yesterday and has asked to see her again" Fury said
"Me? What the hell does he want to see me for?" Vivian asked
"You'll just have to find out"
Vivian couldn't get the overly catchy theme tune out of her head as she hummed it down the corridor as she marched literally down the corridor, most of the agents stared as she walked past mostly because of her marching and the other because for once she was in flat DM creepers not her platforms so they saw her at her full height.
Her cheerful mood vanished when she walked into the containment room where Loki was being held,
"Good morning Miss Rose" he said smiling at her,
"What do you want?" she asked folding her arms impatiently
"I am willing to tell you everything, all of Apocalypses plans"
Vivian looked at him suspiciously "And what's the catch?"
"Your services" the way he said that and the creepy smirk on his face told her it wasn't the services she was proud of,
"Sorry my services include gambling, hacking and destruction, the services you're after you should have asked for Alice" she corrected bitterly,
"I don't want Alice, I wanted you"
"Nope. Not going to happen"
"So you don't care what happens to the world?" Loki questioned,
"Not really. The idiots here can save themselves and mankind could do with a clean up" she shrugged nonchalantly,
"And what about the man you snuck off to England to meet? Do you not care what happens to him?" Loki watched with amusement as he struck a nerve with the small woman "I can easily send the horsemen over to England"
Vivian laughed suddenly, clutching her side "O I doubt that. I mean since they left you behind I'd hazard a guess that they don't need you anymore. So your threats are invalid" Vivian unfolded her arms to stretch them "So unless you have something worthwhile to say, I'll be going back to work" she said turning on heels to walk away
"I believe interrogating me was your work"
Vivian cringed 'damn he's right' she glanced over her shoulder back at the god "Look if you want sex that much I'll get Alice to find you a hooker"
"I beg your pardon?"
"A hooker. A whore. A prostitute"
Vivian left the room frustrated and soon found Alice in the canteen with a Steve, Stark and Banner.
"I need you to do me a favour" she stated sitting down with coffee and a cupcake,
"I hate it you say it, the last time you asked me for a favour it resulted in high jacking a police car and filling it with fireworks before rolling it down a hill"
"It was fourth of July! And your birthday! I was celebrating in style" Vivian reminded licking the icing off the cupcake before eating the cake base
"Didn't have anything to do with the fact you were plastered either?"
"Anyway! Where can I find a hooker?"
That was the least likely question to ever come out of Vivian's mouth, everyone almost chocked "Not for me you twit" she snapped, "Loki agreed to reveal all of Apocalypses plans under the precedent of him getting laid"
"I heard that he requested you personally for that job" Barton chipped in with a smirk, leaning on the back of Vivian's chair, she cringed looking up at the master sniper
"It's not polite to eavesdrop. I'm not sleeping with him just for some information, the world can burn for all I care" she huffed draining the rest of her coffee.
"Surely the 'high class' girls would have their own websites" I said,
"Not that you'd know anything about that" Vivian laughed making everyone look at me,
"I have never been a prostitute" I said calmly, "So how are we going to find him a lady of the night?" I asked, "I mean it's not like we can let him out of his snow globe"
"Snow globe?" Banner asked looking at Vivian,
"I found a tub of glitter decided to make him pretty" she said taking another sip of her coffee, "We could always go round with a picture and bring the girls here. I'll bet SHIELD has some super secret brainwashing stuff" Vivian said looking at Barton in particular,
"Does any of this strike you as insane?" Stark asked
"Insane is my middle name" Vivian said, "Hers is Liberty"
"Your middle name is Liberty and you were born on the fourth of July?" Stark laughed
"Whatever I have come to terms with my wildly unoriginal mother, so we just need to get a picture of him that doesn't look too creepy so we can get him a girl. No problem" I left the table with Vivian and headed back to Loki's snow globe,
"Oh you've come back?" He said looking at Vivian making her shiver, "With a friend to preserve your dignity?"
"Actually she's going to take a picture of you and we're going to look for a lovely lady of the night to bring back for you" Vivian said cheerily
"A what?" he was obviously confused
"She means a prostitute. We're gonna take a picture then we can show it to a girl she'll give us her rate and we'll bring her to you" I said holding my phone up to Loki, "Now smile bitch" I commanded as I snapped a picture.
Thankfully it wasn't too creepy. He actually looked like a sane person and not a spoilt little bitch who wanted to dominate mankind just because Daddy didn't love him as much as his brother, "Fabulous" I said putting my phone back in my pocket, "Now do you have any preferences or any weird kinks I should know about?"
"How can you be so blasé about all this?" Loki asked,
"Honey sex is second nature to me. I've been doing it since I was fourteen"
"Slut" Vivian coughed
"Frigid" I said bluntly, "Now physical type and kinks"
"Someone like her" Loki said pointing at Vivian,
"So short with a bad temper and an over fondness for whiskey got it. And no kinks?"
"No" Loki said
"Alrighty well we'll have to wait till later to get your lady friend since by their nature they don't come out during the day and the ones that do aren't exactly class A material" I said walking off with Vivian,
"So we're really going to find him a hooker?" she asked, "I've never picked one up before, how do you do it exactly?"
"It's easy. You walk up to her ask how much for an hour or however long you want and she'll tell you and if you agree to her terms you find an alley somewhere push her against the wall and don't kiss her on the mouth" I said, "They don't like that"
"You seem so well versed in the world of street walkers" Vivian said
"I got a guy laid for his sweet sixteenth" I said, "I was dating his friend and they were to chicken to go and talk to the girl so I did it. So I'm going to drop you at the lab and then I'm going shopping. I'm not suited for these harsh New York autumns and I need warmer clothes"
"Didn't you just go shopping the other day?"
"Yes but a girl can never have too many clothes" I said as we passed the lab, "I'll be back in about an hour"
"See you"
"Are you really going to pick up a hooker?" Steve asked as I passed him in the hall
"I am. If getting that idiot laid will get him to tell us all his secrets then I'm for it. Now unless you're coming shopping with me I bid you adieu" I said brushing past Steve and heading back out of the base
"Got any information yet?" Tony asked as Vivian walked into the lab carrying three cups of coffee setting them on the desk where there was space
"No, Ali is going to pick up his fling later, then I get information." Vivian said claiming a cup of coffee,
"Would have been easier if you'd just slept with him"
Vivian scowled at Stark before continuing her work on the floor,
"We have desks"
"Does everything I do bug you?" She snapped at the billionaire,
"You're just making the place look messy"
"I don't see there being a problem" Banner defended her
"Thank you Dr Banner" she smiled, pulling a face at Stark.
Vivian seemed to end up as the bringer of food for the lab, as she as soon went to go get more coffee Stark gave her a list so she asked the doctor if he wanted anything bringing back. So off she went, passing the confinement room poking her head in Loki was just sat looking pretty bored. Despite him being evil, she did feel a bit sorry for him she made two trips to the canteen. The first trip involved a cup of coffee, a cupcake and a book, which she delivered quietly to the cage opening the doors enough to put the items in then closing them to return to the canteen for everything else.
"Took your time" Stark complained, taking the sandwich and coffee he'd asked her to bring,
"So get it yourself next time" she replied placing the doctor's sandwich on the desk,
"Thank you Vivian." Banner thanked looking up from his work,
"At least someone has manners" Vivian sat back on the floor with coffee and a cupcake.
"Is that all you're having for lunch?" Banner asked, watching her dismantle the cupcake, she nodded, the doctor walked over to her and handed her half of his sandwich "a cupcake is a dessert not a main meal"
"But-"
The doctor took no excuse leaving Vivian with half of the sandwich. They ate then carried on with work. Vivian was concentrating on creating more bullets for Alice and Black widow since she had requested some too. Her nose twitched, she simply sniffed which sorted it out for a few seconds before she sneezed into a small pot of gunpowder which created a small plume of black smoke. She scurried away from the mess coughing painfully,
"Bless you" Banner knelt beside her rubbing her back "look at me for a minute" her checked her eyes, he could see traces of the gunpowder she'd been using in them, "Tony get me some water" he looked back at Vivian who was still coughing and spluttering "how do you feel?"
"I have a cracking headache and feel like I've swallowed sandpaper other than that I feel fine" she said between coughs. Tony reappeared with the water. A whole jug of it which he practically chucked over her
"That is for hacking my computers." he said
Vivian blinked the water from her eyes which on the bright side cleared them of the remaining gunpowder, and then she started laughing which then turned into a painful coughing fit then more laughing
"You are such a child at times" she mused trying to ignore the pain in her chest,
"Come on we need to get you outside for some air," Bruce helped Vivian to her feet and guided her to the deck.
I returned later in the evening with 'Candi', who had agreed to be Loki's date for the evening,
"This is a strange place" she said
"Yeah it's also pretty secret so don't tell any of your friends"
"Sure thing" I took 'Candi' down to the containment cell,
"This is you. Candi, Loki. Loki, Candi. Have fun" I opened the door a little to let Candi through, "oh and Candi this is his first time"
"That's ok. I specialize in first times"
"Great" I picked up all my bags and headed back to the lab where I knew I'd find Vivian,
"Oh you're back! Great" Vivian said, "Did you get my hoodie?"
"Of course" I took out a men's large hoodie from one of my many bags, "got you a hat and scarf as well" I pulled out a Tom Baker-esque striped scarf and a 'Skellanimals' hat which had long rabbit ears and a skull face,
"Great! Now I'm all set for winter!" Vivian said wrapping her scarf around her. Even after wrapping it several times around herself the scarf still trailed on the ground much to Stark's amusement,
"Well if no one minds I'm gonna leave these bags here cause I have to take Candi home when they're done in the snow globe" I left my bags under the desk Vivian was most fond of sleeping under and headed to the gym
When I got back from the gym I noticed Steve was in the lab with the others,
"Probably looking for me" I thought although the closer I got to the lab the more of the conversation I could hear,
"Honestly Rodgers. A good looking girl like that and you haven't had her flat on her back screaming your name" everyone else in the lab shifted uncomfortably, "Does she not do it for you?" Stark continued
"Not that anyone else's love life is any of your business" I decided to intervene to save everyone else's sanity,
"Oh good maybe you can explain things" Stark said
"Give me an hour I'll explain everything" I said grabbing Steve by the front of his t-shirt and dragging him off with me
An hour later and I was exhausted. My physical excursions had taken their toll not to mention my legs felt like jelly,
"That was -" Steve started
"Amazing I know. I'm just that good" I laughed pulling my underpants and jeans back on, "You're a real boy now Steve" I joked; "Now where did that bra go?" I picked up my blouse and my bra fell out of it, "ah there it is" after I re dressed I fixed my hair and waited for Steve to dress.
As soon as I opened the door I was hit by streamers,
"Mazaltoph!" Vivian yelled, "Congratulations on becoming a man Cap!"
"Vivian!" I chastised
"Alice!" She mimicked, "Loki's done so you need to take Candi back to her corner"
"Right off I go. We'll continue this later" I said to Steve before walking off to escort Candi home