(I say this at the beginning of every chapter but again thank you for the nice words and such, it keeps me motivated ;u;. I'm almost completely moved out of my apartment too~ so I won't have that to deal with soon as well. I hope this chapter is good)
You just stare blankly at John's splayed hands before raising your slightly shaking hand up to run through your hair lightly as dread sinks into your stomach. You see, as you bring it back down, a few light strands now clinging to your own hand. You clench your hand in a fist, bringing your gaze back up to the frozen John. He doesn't look like he knows what to do.
You force a dry laugh. "Egbert it looks like you wrestled a white bunny. Why don't you clean your hands off?" You question, brushing by him towards the bathroom to stop in front of the mirror. You gingerly wipe your hands off, then set them on the rim of the sink and look at your reflection.
John kind of jumps as he brushes his hands off and then swivels around and cautiously comes to the entrance of the bathroom. He looks puzzled but doesn't say anything as you stare at yourself. You're not sure if you like the company or not.
Both you and John stay kind of frozen for a bit while you look at your hair. "I have to just…get rid of this. I can't watch it just all fall out bit by bit," you say, finally breaking the silence. The sound reverberates through the room. "Plus it wouldn't go with my Strider swag to have bald spots," you add trying to lighten the mood.
John looks down absently at his hands, nervously biting at his lower lip. "Well…I mean if you want to get rid of it, I can help you right now. I brought something so I could just get rid of all my hair as soon it started falling out," he smiles timidly up at you. It looks almost apologetic, not really meeting his eyes which seem to emphasize sadness with the dark blue.
You look at your own red eyes in the mirror's reflection. "Would…you mind if I use it?" you ask begrudgingly, not wanting to lose your hair, but as earlier stated not wanting to watch it fall out piece by piece.
"Sure, just one sec," he responds, immediately turning and going to his side of the room. You can hear him rummaging through his suitcase and you absently run a hand through your hair again, a little more hair following the previous fallen strands. A person looking directly at you wouldn't be able to tell right now but you have a feeling it won't stay that way for long.
John comes back into the bathroom, coming to a halt right beside you. "Here…" he says, offering the clippers to you. You raise your hand and take them, looking at the odd contraption. You've never seen one in person before since you always kept your hair sort of shaggy. You shake your head handing the clippers back to John. "Will…will you do it?" you ask hating the uncertainty that you can hear clearly. You're not sure if John can hear it though.
"Sure Dave, it's no problem," he smiles, and this time it touches his eyes slightly. He takes the clippers back from you and you close your eyes as you hear the clippers whir to life. You feel the blades touch your skin and slide across it in smooth strokes. His hand lightly glides behind the clippers, over the hairless areas, making your stomach flutter slightly, for some odd reason.
After a few minutes of this John turns the clippers off and you breathe in and let it out slowly, opening your eyes. Your platinum blond hair is now in a mess on the floor, on your clothes and your scalp is completely ridden of the long white blond strands.
You slowly raise your hand, running it over your head. "Feels weird," you mutter to yourself but John smiles slightly, looking apologetic. "Why don't we go to bed Dave?" he asks, lightly clasping your hand and you look at your joined hands. It strikes you as odd, but it feels good and you welcome the warmth spreading up your arm.
He leads you back to bed and goes to his own bed. You lay there silently thinking. 'John isn't so bad' you think to yourself. You could get used to his constant cheeriness overriding some of your ironic-ness.
You shift your head around restlessly, getting used to the new feeling of being bald. After adjusting and finally getting comfy you drift off to sleep.
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You rinse your mouth one last time before walking out of the bathroom to grab your crimson toboggan and sliding it onto your smooth head. After that you flop onto your bed and lean back, planning on wasting time until a nurse comes to get you for your checkup to see your progress. You let your eyes slide shut, the only sounds coming from the occasional passerby.
After dozing in and out you hear the door open. But the person doesn't knock so you say "Hey man, after the checkup you want to go outside? I figure you won't feel like it after you start up your chemo." You assume it's John since he is the only one who comes in like he owns the place, which he kind of owns half the place.
"You gonna buy me dinner first?" you hear a much deeper voice reply and your eyes snap open. "Bro?" you ask incredulously, "What are you doing here?" It wasn't incredibly far from their home to this particular hospital but it was no daily visit either.
"Can't I come see my kid brother without being fuckin up to something?" he asks huffily, shoving his gloved hands into his jean pockets, his dumb anime shades pointed in your direction. You role your red eyes, but the motion is lost behind your own shades.
"Well sup?" he finally asks, walking over and flopping into a chair near your bed. "Who'd you think you were talking to? What the fuck happened to your hair?"
You sigh, feeling a migraine coming on. Your brother and you never socialize this much, and you think he's probably just feeling bad for not visiting you and the whole ordeal in general. "My roommate. John. He moved into this room about a week…and a half ago," you say, tilting your head as you try to think of when he moved in. You two had really gotten along well this past week and you no longer begrudged having a roommate, you were actually happy to have one you didn't feel shades of awkward to talk to.
"And as for the hair thing, chemo does that to you Bro. Just cut it all off as soon as it started coming out so I didn't have ugly ass bald spots. That wouldn't suit a Strider at all." "Mmm," he hums in response and you kind of just sit there not sure what to do. You finally indulge in this over social interaction. "So…Uh…sup with you? Still doing shit for that stupid website of yours?" you ask, sliding your hand under your toboggan to scratch at your scalp.
"Little dude, that website is not dumb and you know it. That shit pays our bills and provides me with some occasional amusement," he says waggling his eyebrows above his pointed shades and you don't even try to understand the background to that statement.
You rub your eyes and Bro speaks up again, "So you and this John kid up to something?" he smirks, tilting his head down so you can see his eyes and he waggles his eyebrows once again. "What?" you ask incredulously, "John is just a new friend, dude."
Bro tilts his head slightly, leaning back in his chair. "Oh yeah, that's why you want to spend time with him before he gets to sick to move…hmmm sounds to me like you have a crush." He smirks again and crosses his legs. "Is he cute at least?"
You feel blood rising to your cheeks and you try to suppress it, hoping Bro can't see. "Dude," is all you say as you give him a pointed look. "It's ok to have a crush, even if your crush has a penis. Penis isn't bad at all," his smirk almost turns predatory. "Yeaaaah…because you know all about penis," you reply, knowing good and well Bro has brought home his fair share of guys. "Damn straight I know all about penis. And the added bonus of asses."
You shake your head, rubbing at your eyes yet again. Yep, there was definitely a migraine forming in your cranium.
You hear someone knock. 'Oh thank god no more talk of penises' you sigh out as relief washes over you "Come in," you say loudly and Bro sort of just tilts his head to see who comes in.
As you predicted a nurse comes in. "Uhm...It's time for your checkup," the small girl says timidly. She looks at Bro, probably unsure of if she needs to make him leave. You personally don't care. "You can stay Bro, this will take about an hour," you say as you swing your legs off the bed and stand up. Walking up to meet the nurse, you fist bump Bro as you walk past. "If not see you man, thanks for the visit." You say following the nurse out of the room and the door clicks quietly.
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You slip back into your room with a sigh. Looking up you see John in his respective bed grinning toothily…and Bro in yours. "Bro what the fuck?" you ask, thinking he surely would've left. "Sup? How was your checkup or whatever," he asks nonchalantly like this was normal.
"The chemo is having an affect on the tumor, but not as fast as they had anticipated so I'll be stuck here for longer than originally planned."
"Well that sucks. Least you have a nice little roommate here. I've been getting to know him," he nods towards John and John smiles toothily again. You feel something gnawing at your stomach, something like jealousy, but you blatantly ignore it. "You never told me about your brother Dave, he's pretty cool," John continues smiling, shaking his head a bit to get some loose raven hair out of his way.
Bro gets up and stretches. "Well I just thought I'd wait around until you got back. See ya later little dude." He walks over and offers a fist. You slowly hold up your own fist to greet his. "Nice meeting you John," Bro says, holding his hand up, not looking back as he walks to the door and slips out.
You let out a huff of air and then go sit on the edge of your bed. John looks at you, his smile still touching his eyes. "So what's up Dave, your brother said you thought he was me earlier today?" he asks, inspecting his hands. "Yeah," you mutter," I was going to see if you wanted to go for a walk or something." John leans forward, trying to better catch what you said as his buckteeth emerge to play nervously at his bottom lip. "Well.. we could go on a walk if you would like?" John asks smiling up at you, his blue eyes seeming to shine.
"No that's ok…Just forget it," you say, upset for no reason, totally not jealous that your brother can make John smile like that. You slip on your earphones and lay back on your bed, closing your eyes.
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You hear a familiar retching sound that for once, isn't emerging from you. Your eyes flutter open as you slide off the bed and head towards the bathroom. You push the door open to find John with his face resting on the seat of the toilet his arms limp at his side. He has sweat shining on his face and he looks absolutely pitiful.
You walk of, kneeling beside him. He slides his dark blue eyes towards yours, his hazed over with pain. "Dave, this sucks…this really sucks I feel like I'm dying. Well quicker than I was at any rate," he chuckles, trying to be funny. He quickly turns his face back towards the toilet though as he heaves some more. You grab up some of his raven locks. "First time is always the worst," you tell him matter-of-factly. It was for you at any rate.
You slowly rub his back and pap his head as he lays his head down feebly again. You now felt bad for not going on a walk yesterday but you had let your own emotions get the better of you when there was no need of them. There was no need to be jealous of Bro and John getting along. Even though just thinking about it still made the ugly emotions coil around your insides. But John had had his first chemo therapy of the day and you had figured he'd feel like this. What a great roommate you were.
After a countless amount of time sitting there John stops shaking as much and you look at him. "Feeling any better?" you ask, continuing to rub his back. The constant motion had made your hand numb. John smiles weakly at you "Yeah, a little."
He shakily tries to get up and you bounce up on your feet first, flexing your hand slightly to get feeling and grabbing his hand into yours and pulling him gently to his feet. He wobbles slightly and you wrap an arm around him to steady him. He just stands there, not attempting to move. You shift your head and look down at him. "You ok there?" you ask. "Yeah, it's just nice to have someone to hug," he mutters, sinking into your frame, wrapping his arms around your torso. You catch his weight, even though you were off guard. He's really light already and your worried what the chemo will do to him.
After a few minutes you decide he needs to sleep. "Ok champ, time to haul your ass to bed," you say, ducking down and sweeping him off his feet. He squeeks, surprised by the sudden movement. "W-what are you doing Dave?" he asks, now clinging to your neck. "Gonna tuck you in, is what I'm doing."
You walk over to his bed and deposit him gently in the bed. You then reach over and tug the covers up on him and even plant a chaste light kiss on his forehead. "You got the whole deal Egbert, you should feel special," you smirk at him, going back to your own bed and hauling yourself up.
"Haha, yeah thanks Dave. Haven't had anyone do that for me since my Dad did it for me a long time ago," he smiles sadly.
"Well..maybe he can when he comes and visits you?" You ask, not sure how far away John's Dad lived. They both hadn't really brought up family in their various discussions. Just likes. Like how Dave loved photography, and ironic things and how John had a weird infatuation for Nic Cage.
"I wish. He can't though, since he passed away a few years back," he glumly states. 'Well now I'm a jackass'
"Oh…I'm sorry…what…Happened?" your not sure if this is a good topic to talk about. But John just shrugs, "He got into a car crash when it was slick out. I used to live in Washington till that happened, then I just couldn't live there anymore so I kind of just packed up and moved to an entirely new place."
"Well I'm sorry. You know I'm here for you right?" you ask meeting his eyes. You've never felt that way for anyone but Bro before, but you mean it. You really like John and you're finally starting to admit that to yourself. "Yeah Dave, thanks" he smiles sleepily, and yawns.
"I think it's time for bed," you say and he just nods. "Goodnight Dave," "G'night John," you reply, leaning back into your pillows. You let your eyes slide shut and you drift off.
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(I'm sorry if this chapter sucks, but I hope you enjoyed it. Please tell me if you notice anything I should correct or in general if it isn't well written, because I'm kind of tired. Thanks ^_^ )