'Tongues on the sockets of electric dreams,

Where the sewage of youth drown the spark of my teens'

Apologies and Anger

"Well what word choice would you choose, Black?" Riley snarled, turning around to face Sirius who was hovering above her, his arms folded.

"Anything that wouldn't offend Claudia. It's a shame really," he said, "How someone as nice and funny as Claudia could have the… misfortune of having you as a sister."

Riley stood up to face him. "Excuse me?"

"Well, we all know that Claudia is more apt to go out with her friends and have a good time. Whereas for the past five years, you've been a rather boring little loner."

"Get lost, Black." Lily spat and stood up beside Riley.

Riley was just staring at Sirius, anger coursing through her. She knew that he knew that that had gotten to her. She knew he knew it was the truth. And it was. Until this year, Riley was happy to be alone. If she was alone, there was no drama and what was happening just proved how she was stupid to befriend anyone. She stood her ground though. She would never give Sirius Black the satisfaction.

"Well you know what, Black," Riley snarled, "All of that might be true but at least my family can accept me for who I am."

After registering the look of utter shock on Sirius' face, Riley stormed out of the Great Hall. She hadn't even noticed that half of the Great Hall had been listening to her and Sirius' argument. All she knew was that she had went just a step to far. But it was his own fault. He had pushed her. She quickly walked down the stairs and came across the portrait of a bowl of fruit. James had once let slip of how to get into the kitchens, so she tickled the pear and sure enough she had soon entered the kitchens of Hogwarts.

The place was swarming with House Elves running back and fourth from the four tables that represented the House tables in the Great Hall. She saw a clear space at the back of the far left table and went and sat down at it. There were immediately at least four house eves surrounding her.

"What can we be helping misses with?" one of them asked.

"Can I just have some pumpkin juice and chocolate cake, please?"

The four elves nodded simultaneously and ran off, muttering orders to themselves. Riley sighed and watched the house elves for a while. It was a shame really that this is what they done everyday. Riley even heard they clean up the common rooms at night. But they seem to enjoy it, so why take that away from them?

"Here is your pumpkin juice and chocolate cake, misses."

Riley thanked the elf and watched it walk away. When she looked down at the cake she realized she didn't even feel hungry. She got up from the table and started to make her way out when someone entered through the portrait.

"James," Riley said and turned back around and sat at the table next to her. James sat across from her. "Get it over with." she sighed and rested her head on the table.

"I'm not here to shout or yell at you, Riles."

She looked up.

"I just want to let you know, that what you said was just a little bit out of order. I know he was pushing you, but Sirius' family is a very…delicate place to go."

Riley whined. "I know, James, I know. I honestly really do fee horrible for saying it."

"I think…" James paused. "I think you should apologize."

He flinched, afraid Riley would smack him on the head as she had done so many times for him suggesting idiotic things.

"Fine.." Riley mumbled.

"Let's go back up to the common room, then."

James stood up and waited for Riley to follow.

"What? I've to apologize now?" Riley exclaimed, standing up.

"Yes."

"But- I can't do it now."

"Why not?" James questioned her. She opened her mouth to reply, but before she could, James had grabbed her hand and was now pulling her through the portrait and through the corridor.

X

"Padfoot!"

James had dragged a protesting Riley all the way up to the Gryffindor Common Room while she made up pathetic excuses on why she was unable to apologize tonight. As he entered, they Common Room was packed.

"He might not be here," Riley said, "It'll just need to wait then."

She managed to squeeze out of his grip, but stopped instantly as she saw Sirius at the bottom of the boys dormitory steps. She felt James stand beside her.

Sirius looked at her with distaste then back to James.

"What?"

"Riley here has something to say to you," James replied and looked at Riley who was giving him daggers.

She turned to face Sirius.

"I'm sorry…" she mumbled, barely audible.

"Sorry, I didn't quite catch that," Sirius replied, smirking. "Can everyone in here quiet down for me? Martinez over here has something to say!"

He looked around the common room and watched as almost every eye turned to them.

"As you were saying?" He said to her.

"I said," Riley said, clearing her throat. "That I am sorry for what I said to you, Black."

"Apology not accepted," Sirius replied and turned to go back up the stairs.

"WHAT?" Riley yelled.

Sirius turned back around, smirking.

"You honestly don't think after one sorry, I'll forgive you instantly, do you?"

"Er, yes, I do!" Riley said. "That's how sorry's work! Someone says 'I'm sorry' and the other says 'apology accepted!'"

"Not with Sirius Black, it doesn't."

X

The Saturday morning sun shone through the windows of the girls dormitory, signaling that it was time to awaken.

Ever since Riley tried to apologize to Sirius, they had been arguing non-stop. And it was over the most pointless things.

"Did you put the boomslang skin over there?" Riley had asked him, civilly, one potions class.

"No! It must've been you."

"It was not!"

And that argument was only a minor one. Lily woke Riley up early as she had promised, so Riley could attach a letter onto the flowers for her Grandfathers grave that she would be sending off later on to her parents. Riley got up and pulled her hair into a messy bun and stuck on a pair of jogger bottoms and a tank top. She took the flowers Claudia had picked and went down to the common room to write her letter in private. It was too early in the morning on a weekend for the common room to be full, but there were a fair few, though she found a space next to the fire.

Abuelo,

You have no idea how much I miss you right now. I can't believe I've actually survived three years without you…I feel horrible. Horrible that I sat and watched them tear you down bit by bit. How I watched them kick you out of the family for doing what was right. It sickens me that I couldn't do anything to help you. But I know you wouldn't of wanted me to, that to help you would've killed me too. I'm so sorry. So so sorry I let them do that to you. You were one of the two people in this family that paid attention to me when I needed it. One of the two people that cared for me. And now your gone. I have my bracelet though. You have no idea how much I love it and the lengths I go through to keep it safe…yes, the things I do to keep you in my memory.

I promise I won't let them break me like they broke you.

Adore siempre,

Su Nieta, Riley

Riley wiped away the tears that were now spilling onto the page and folded the letter and put it into an envelope. She ran up to her dormitory and got Lily to perform a charm that would prevent anybody from reading it. Nobody could know about the day her Grandfather died. Only she, Riley knew. She shook as she remembered that day. No, she told herself, don't think about it.

After his death, for weeks she had such horrifying nightmares and sometimes, when she let herself into those memories again, she could never go back to sleep, her dreams filled with pain, torture death…

"Are you sure you want to go down to the game. Riles?" Lily asked her, watching Riley stare blankly out of the window.

"Yes," Riley replied, returning from her thoughts, "It's best if I just keep my mind off it."

X

Down in the Great Hall, Remus watched as James and Sirius stuffed their face with the breakfast the elves had prepared that morning; beans, bacon, eggs, back pudding and toast.

"How do you digest it all?" he asked astonished at how quickly they were able to refill.

"It's not that much food, Moony," Sirius replied before taking another swat of food.

Remus watch them for a few more minutes and then looked at the entrance of the Great Hall where people were filing in quickly, eager for the match to start. He saw Riley and Lily enter, Riley looking rather far away and distant. Claudia then entered after her, looking very cheerful. As Riley passed where they were sitting ,Remus smiled softly and nodded. She gave a small smile back and sat further down the table with Lily.

"Here comes Claudia, Sirius," Peter warned him.

Swearing, Sirius dropped his fork and knife, quickly swallowed his food and wiped his mouth with a napkin lying near by. Claudia skipped up behind him and covered his eyes with her hands.

"Guess who?" she asked, excitedly.

"Oh bloody hell," James mumbled and hid his face behind his hands.

"I'm not to sure…" Sirius replied, "I've got a funny feeling it's a very cute Ravenclaw?"

Remus hid his laugh behind his hands but James, obviously not afraid to hide his embarrassment that it was causing for his best friend, snorted. Claudia was oblivious to all of this.

"Correct," she said removing her hands from his eyes and giving him a peck on the cheek. "I just wanted to wish you good luck for today."

"Well thank you," Sirius said and turned around and gave her a kiss.

"Not at the table, please," James whined. "There are people trying to eat here!"

Sirius hit him in the gut, but pulled away from a now pouting Claudia. He winked at her and this seemed to satisfy her as she waved and left. Sirius went back to his breakfast as if the whole thing hadn't happened.

From the corner of his eye, Remus watched as Riley turned away from the group, looking livid, after watching it all. His attention was then diverted back to James and Sirius. James now had his hands over Sirius and in a very high pitched voice, he asked "Guess who?"

"Prongs…" Sirius replied, not sounding amused.

"No, wait," Remus interjected. "Let me guess…I think it's a very cute Gryffindor?"

"You think I'm cute? Oh thanks, Moony," James replied laughing and then giving Remus a high five across the table.

X

"It was only on Halloween she was yelling at me for being all happy and excited and it wasn't even his bloody anniversary! Now, on the actual day he died three years later, she's prancing about like Christmas has came fucking early!"

"Riley…"

"No, Lily! I have a right to be angry. She has no right whatsoever to be angry with me and the way I acted. If I hadn't of had the elixir, I wouldn't of even been acting like that. She has no excuse, though!"

Riley took in a few shaky breaths and took a drink of her Pumpkin juice. God help Claudia if she came across Riley today.

You guys have no idea how thrilled I am with this chapter, haha. I'm finally getting back in to the swing of things with this story! I decided to write this last night because I got into trouble with my parents so they've been shutting off the internet at ten o'clock at night and it's honestly the best thing that's ever happened, haha! I think I'll be writing forever if they keep doing that!

Here's the translations :

Abuelo - Grandfather

Adore siempre, su Nieta - Love always, your Granddaughter.

Please review!

Abbey xoxo