"the internet killed the video star "
[インターネットがビデオスターを殺した]
an aph facebook fanfiction
DISCLAIMER:
Don't own Hetalia. You should already be well aware of that.
I also don't own the title. I got that from the song "The Internet Killed the Video Star".
Not much else to say, except enjoy.
Oh, wait. There's a BUNCH to say. The reason I've been absent is simple: life promptly decided to kick me in the ass. HARD. Things got complicated fast, and I either had no time to write or wasn't inspired to. It was seriously depressing - I wanted to write but was utterly drained of any inspiration to do so. And thinking about all of you, wondering whether this story was dead, I felt like I was letting you all down, and for that, I seriously, seriously apologize. Now to mention some things briefly:
1) I'm starting a new project called Poker Face. I wanted to write something dark, edgy and possibly disturbing: that, and I really wanted to see if I could jump-start a sort-of 2P! revolution. See, when writing this I noticed a bit of a spike in Lovino/Arthur fanfics (which made me so very happy. I really love that pairing.) and I was hoping I could prod the fandom into seeing the massive amount of potential 2P! holds. Now, some people have some really great ideas considering this - but it's a little disappointing to look for 2P! fanfictions and find almost NOTHING but gorn. (Gorn = Gore + Porn, BTW)
2) I love this story, I really do. But a lot of the fanon and new information thought up by the fandom contradicts quite a bit of what's it this story and some of it I really do love. That, and new information is coming out from CANON sources so things may change a bit. If you'd like to see various head canon that I've either thought of or just like, it's on my profile. I really only have it filled out for AMERICA, CANADA and ENGLAND at the moment. Scotland's is next, followed by Wales and Ireland might take a while due to new canon input. So, if you notice some little changes here and there, that's me trying to update to fit the new info. (On an unrelated note: expect new characters! Like India with his badass Bollywood self. Between him, Macau and Romania... I don't know who's my new favorite. :D)
3) I apologize (again) for the accidental self-promoting. I really don't like doing that unless I need input for a particular part of the story - I'm not going to spam my author notes with "OMG to lyk finish this sotry I need MORE REVIEWS!11! REVIEW OR YOU'LL DIE!" And may I also mention that the sentence before this was PAINFUL to write? Ick.
4) I've been trolling around on Fanfiction for a while before I started writing again, really, and I just have to say... we have a GREAT fandom. We're highly united and far more respecting of each other's personal opinions and thoughts than other fandoms that are around here... (Kingdom Hearts, I'm looking at YOU. YES, YOU.) Very few things divide us and even less are things we start arguments or god forbid flame wars over: and I just realized how much I appreciate that in this fandom. You guys rock. Really! ^_^
And now that all of THAT is over, now you can enjoy!
chapter thirty-one :: 45 [shinedown]
- saturday, september 6th
PROBLEM SOLVING:
answer :: Genesis "General" Winter
conclusion :: Here we go, ladies and gentlemen. Mostly ladies. I don't think I've ever had a male reviewer. The answer to all problems, the devil haunting us since the beginning of this arc... is General Winter, gracefully swooping in to make Ivan's life a living hell. Glorious. He fits both clues, unlike his brother who only fits the fact that his last name is Winter... and Thanatos also isn't on the archive character list. General Winter IS. (This is a clue I introduced towards the beginning.) Now... for one. last. question.
question :: how does general survive?
hint :: Since this is the last question for this arc, I'm going to give you a little change for some WMG. Wild Mass Guessing. Remember that little vote back in chapter 24 when I asked you whether to let him live or not? Swingo. He lives and comes back later for more. If you haven't starting regretting that discussion NOW, you probably will very soon. Either way, be as inventive as you want. I want to see if someone actually gets close to what I had planned. And if you're right, I'll think of something to give you.
Peter Kirkland: Well, this sucks.
[Arthur Kirkland and 14 others like this]
Ludwig Beilschmidt: We really shouldn't be doing this ourselves... the police could have handled this much better.
(Mobile) Tino Vainamoinen: I normally save the sarcastic laughter for Maiken or Brynja but... HA.
[Berwald Oxenstierna and 7 others like this]
Mei Wang: Oh my Gosh, do something! Please!
Antonio Carriedo: Ay... that didn't sound good...
Feliciano Vargas: Wah! What is it now?
(Mobile) Chantal Zwingli: Seriously? Imelda, tell those four to get some common sense so that way Renate can stop panicking. Don't know why she is, but she is.
Antonio Carriedo: I... can't... she's gone again.
Chantal Zwingli: Get her back on! Renate's about to cry.
Antonio Carriedo: I can't. She hung up on me all of a sudden, and all I heard was a gun shot.
Liane Zwingli: Oh... no...
[Omorose Hassan and 10 others like this]
(Mobile) Leticia Guerra: N-No... n-no...
Antonio Carriedo: Ticia...
Raquel Cabral: I can't stand Imelda sometimes. She's too reckless for her own good.
Leticia Guerra: ... You have NO right to talk about someone else. None. Whatsoever.
[Rosario de la Cruz and 5 others like this]
(Mobile) Antonio Carriedo: Okay~ I have good news and bad news.
Mei Wang: Good news first! Good news first!
Madara Galante: I'd much rather hear good news right about now too...
Arthur Kirkland: Actually, shouldn't we hear the bad news first...?
Antonio Carriedo: Good news first it is! :)
[Madara Galante and 1 other likes this]
Jeanette Bonnefoy: People just do not listen to you, mon ami...
[Peter Kirkland and 14 others like this]
Arthur Kirkland: [/sigh] I know, right? It's really quite pathetic, especially when I'm RIGHT.
Adrian Kirkland: OY. Stop changing the subject, I'm on here to figure WHY YE BE BLOWING UP MY PHONE.
[Aeden Kirkland and 5 others like this]
Arthur Kirkland: Welcome to Socialization101. Lesson 1: If you want to be a loner, don't register into a social networking site.
[Lovino Vargas and 23 others like this]
Kiku Honda: What is the news, Antonio-san?
Antonio Carriedo: Well. Imelda's alive and perfectly okay!
Rosario de la Cruz: Finally! LETICIA STOP SPAMMING ME WITH YOUR NONSENSE.
Leticia Guerra: I'm seriously concerned. I have a reason to be this discontent.
Ludwig Beilschmidt: Now what is the bad news?
Antonio Carriedo: ... Don't kill me, I'm just the messenger... but... Imelda didn't get shot... Amelia did.
Andersen Densen: NO...
[Adrian Kirkland and 18 others like this]
(Mobile) Chantal Zwingli: Oh, that's not good.
(Mobile) Renate Edelstein: Thank you, Chantal for being so BLATANTLY OBVIOUS. -_-
[Ludwig Beilschmidt and 8 others like this]
Chantal Zwingli: I'm sorry, I can't help it when you decide to stress yourself out over something you have no control over. Don't you tell me twice a day how obnoxious Gilbert is? And yet you're going to get mad at me because you can't keep your head straight?
Chantal Zwingli: And don't you DARE tell me it's Amelia... you don't care for her and I know this.
Renate Edelstein: He's still my family, even if he's obnoxious.
[Ludwig Beilschmidt and 15 others like this]
Chantal Zwingli: You can still calm down just a little. Gilbert's not useless and he doesn't constantly needed to be looked after like you think. He's fully capable of functioning.
Renate Edelstein: Is he now. Since when?
Chantal Zwingli: You're just mad because I'm not brunette and Hungarian, and I don't bend to your every will and whim, your Highness.
[Lule Adnan and 7 others like this]
Omorose Hassan: ... Is this normal with them?
(Mobile) Anri van der Meer: NO. Ohmygod, I leave for a few minutes to cook and THIS happens? Why?!
(Mobile) Hendrik van der Meer: Don't ask me. I'm just here eating your waffles.
Anri van der Meer: Okay... but don't eat ALL of them this time. I want some too, you know! X|
[Antonio Carriedo likes this]
Brynja Stilesson: O_O Damn...
Feliciano Vargas: V-Ve? What's going on~? :(
Ludwig Beilschmidt: Well... they're not arguing on Facebook anymore...
Elizabeta Hedervary: Oh, God, they're not yelling at each other are they?
Ludwig Beilschmidt: Unfortunately. I came hear them from my bedroom.
Kiku Honda: I hope Chantal isn't upset too much... she can become very unstable and angry...
Lule Adnan: Emphasis on unstable.
[Liane Zwingli and 6 others like this]
Anri van der Meer: Poor Ludwig. Invest in sound-proofing your windows!
Ludwig Beilschmidt: I'm definitely considering it...
[Feliciano Vargas likes this]
(Mobile) Maiken Bondevik: Wait. Where's Antonio? Did he get off again?
Jeanette Bonnefoy: I believe so... he had better not go over there...
Leticia Guerra: ... No one is anyone near Antonio, are they?
Elizabeta Hedervary: Ooh, no. Someone MAY want to check up on him...
(Mobile) Hera Karpusi: On it...!
Lule Adnan: And don't take all damn week, either! DX
(Mobile) Peter Kirkland: Ouch.
Madara Galante: ?
Peter Kirkland: Arthur and Adrian. Adrian flipped shit when he heard about Amelia and Arthur had to tackle him to keep him from leaving. Now I think they're both trying to keep each other from leaving. Arthur's restraining Adrian and telling him why he shouldn't go, but I think he's trying to convince himself too.
Lovino Vargas: ...
Lovino Vargas is now friends with Peter Kirkland.
Feliciano Vargas: Yay~ Make friends, fratellino!
[Lovino Vargas likes this]
Lovino Vargas || (Mobile) Peter Kirkland: Oye. Ask... Ask Arthur if he needs me... over there since apparently...
Peter Kirkland: Asking!
Peter Kirkland: He wants to know why.
Lovino Vargas: Just... J-just because the bastard might want a friend.
Peter Kirkland: He said he loves you.
Lovino Vargas: CHE? N-N-N-NO HE DOESN'T!
Peter Kirkland: Oops... He said he'd love THAT. As in you coming over. Sorry! :D I didn't hear him right!
Lovino Vargas: D-Dio... mio dio, l-listen before you tell me shit like that, dammit!
Lovino Vargas: Tell him I'll BTS.
Peter Kirkland: Sure. :D
Peter Kirkland: Vargas just got TROLLED...! :3
[Feliciano Vargas and 9 others like this]
(Mobile) Lovino Vargas: FFFFFF - PETER, GODDAMNIT!
Peter Kirkland: Hahahahaha, I am VICTORIOUS!
Arthur Kirkland: Really? You're not a singer and you don't go to an art school in Hollywood...
[Tino Vainamoinen and 4 others like this]
Peter Kirkland: Not funny! :\
(Mobile) Antonio Carriedo: Amelia news everyone~! Amelia news!
(Mobile) Chantal Zwingli: Okkka.
Antonio Carriedo: ?
Chantal Zwingli: Sorry. Renate keeps distracting me.
Elizabeta Hedervary: That was fast. You guys fight and make up like a Katy Perry song.
Chantal Zwingli: Oh, eat your damn heart out, Hungarian.
Elizabeta Hedervary: I don't get it. What did I do again? :\
[Anri van der Meer likes this]
Peter Kirkland: HEY EVERYONE. STFU and tell me what's going on! Arthur and Adrian won't leave me alone about it!
Antonio Carriedo: Amelia did get shot, but she saved Yao in the process. She was outside of the pool gate, keeping an eye on them, and she climbed the fence, ran over and jumped in. The strange man shot her in the shoulder while she was jumping but she just... kept swimming. She kept swimming until she pulled Yao out.
[Peter Kirkland and 30 others like this]
Feliciano Vargas: What...? Yay!
Lule Adnan: Wow...
(Mobile) Laima Lauriniatis: Not surprising... it IS Amelia... :)
Peter Kirkland: AWESOME~
Maiken Bondevik: ... Impressive.
Mei Wang: Yes! Yes! Thank you, Amelia, thank you!
Leticia Guerra: Go Amelia. :)
Xiang Wang: Cool. So big bro's okay.
(Mobile) Chernenko Braginski: Yong-Soo and I actually saw it... it was pretty amazing. The Hacker was even shocked by it.
[Andersen Densen and 10 others like this]
Feliks Lukasiewicz: I knew there was a reason I liked that girl. ^_^
Andersen Densen: Atta girl! You SHOW that mother who's boss!
[Elizabeta Hedervary and 2 others like this]
Peter Kirkland: Arthur is almost in tears he's so impressed! Or just relieved.
Feliciano Vargas: Fratello can fix that! Right, fratello?
(Mobile) Lovino Vargas: FELICIANO. Shut. Your. Ass.
Peter Kirkland: LOL, Lovino. Yelling at your phone does nothing!
Lule Adnan || Jeanette Bonnefoy: Mad yet?
Jeanette Bonnefoy: Mon amie~ why would I be mad?
Lule Adnan: Well, Amelia's not dead.
Jeanette Bonnefoy: Really. Everyone says I hate her, I do NOT hate her. She is just... in the way.
Lule Adnan: Maiken hates her guts though...
Jeanette Bonnefoy: That is because it was rumored that they slept together. If you heard that the boy you've been crushing on for years suddenly abandons any and all sense to chase after, date, and then sleep with a girl after three months, wouldn't you hate her too?
Lule Adnan: She should have done something then! Gee. If I told you who I have a crush on right now and told me to go do something about it, I would!
Jeanette Bonnefoy: Who is it then?
Lule Adnan: Elizabeta.
Jeanette Bonnefoy: But... you know her past with Renate, don't you?
Lule Adnan: Oh, I know. It's kind of because of me that they were together in the first place.
Lule Adnan: But this is kind of a recent thing.
Jeanette Bonnefoy: I think it's adorable.
Jeanette Bonnefoy: Now do something about it.
Lule Adnan: ... ...
Lule Adnan: That's good. That's really good. You totally got me on that one - I give you my temporary respect.
Jeanette Bonnefoy: See? I am no dumb blond~
(Mobile) Antonio Carriedo: ... Um. You guys. I think this is over...
Mei Wang: What you talking about?
Antonio Carriedo: The Hacker's dead.
[Andersen Densen and 20 others like this]
Ludwig Beilschmidt: Dead. How...?
Antonio Carriedo: Imelda says he shot himself. In the heart.
Peter Kirkland: Wait a second... Tino told me that men don't usually shoot themselves in the heart.
Madara Galante: He... t-told you that?
Peter Kirkland: Tino likes Law & Order. We watch it sometimes when I sleep over! :D
Ludwig Beilschmidt: I don't see how this is relavent, Peter...
(Mobile) Tino Vainamoinen: Men usually shoot themselves in the head or through the mouth when committing suicide. Women usually shoot themselves in the heart...
Antonio Carriedo: Well... he did.
Eduard von Bock: How did Ivan take that?
Antonio Carriedo: I don't know, nothing from her about anyone else.
Elizabeta Hedervary: But that was so... that's not right. Why he drag up through all of that... and then just off himself? That's not the General Winter I remember...
Renate Edelstein: You knew this guy?
Elizabeta Hedervary: Because of Gilbert. Remember how I told you that Ivan was messing with him? Well, it turns out that GENERAL was messing with Ivan. All of those off-the-wall theories and stuff he spouts? General's doing. The reason why he has a little harem of people? General told him to. The boy's been screwing with him since his mom disappeared.
[Feliks Lukasiewicz and 11 others like this]
Renate Edelstein: ... I actually feel sorry for him.
(Mobile) Chantal Zwingli: You actually feel sorry for the guy. I don't believe you.
Renate Edelstein: Did I NOT just show you how very capable I am at sentimental things?
Chantal Zwingli: You showed me. I just don't understand why you feel sorry for a homicidal maniac.
Jeanette Bonnefoy: Showed her how~?
Elizabeta Hedervary: Really? This is a public wall, anyone can see this!
Chantal Zwingli: You just don't want to hear it.
(Mobile) Berwald Oxenstierna: This really isn't the time and place for this... especially when before we were actually united...
[Tino Vainamoinen likes this]
Tino Vainamoinen: Exactly! :3
[Berwald Oxenstierna likes this]
Alannah Kirkland: Not to rain on any parades, but... you guys are not united. At all.
Brynja Stilesson || Feliciano Vargas: Feli. The whole Hacker drama thing just turned into CA bait. Seriously. Read this.
Feliciano Vargas: Whao~
Brynja Stilesson: They're so ridiculous it's funny.
Feliciano Vargas: Meeting time!
(Mobile) Feliks Lukasiewicz: Okay, so, like, what is UP with Chantal and Elizabeta? Chanti is constantly down her throat.
Lule Adnan: Because Renate and Elizabeta were, THE couple back in middle school.
Feliks Lukasiewicz: Middle school?
Jeanette Bonnefoy: As in 7th to 9th grade. Two whole years.
Lule Adnan: See, they got together because Elizabeta had moved and came back in 7th grade, and she made the hideous mistake of breaking my sunglasses. So, I taught her a lesson. And while she was walking home, apparently Renate saw her and took her to her house to clean her up, because I DID bust the girl up a bit...
Brynja Stilesson: She just broke your sunglasses. -_-
Lule Adnan: I was a firecracker back then. ^_^
Lule Adnan: Well, anyway it was the start of a beautiful friendship. And I'm not totally sure, but the more popular version is that Renate was practicing singing The Cell Block Tango and Elizabeta walked in on it.
(Mobile) Adrian Kirkland: That's true, actually.
Brynja Stilesson: How the hell do you know that, Adrian?
Adrian Kirkland: Because. I'm Adrian Kirkland. I know things.
[Feliks Lukasiewicz and 6 others like this]
Feliks Lukasiewicz: Still doesn't answer my question!
Kiku Honda: Chantal is terrified that Renate may still have feelings for Elizabeta and doesn't want to lose her. She may have possessed feelings for me, but Renate was always the great love of her life.
[Lule Adnan and 7 others like this]
Brynja Stilesson: That's deep.
Feliciano Vargas: That's so... sad...
Lule Adnan: I wish I could help her out, I mean, that sucks.
Brynja Stilesson: Status report from Peter: apparently your brother is over at the Kirkland house right now, Feliciano.
Feliciano Vargas: He IS? :D
Brynja Stilesson: Yeah. Peter's filling me in on the details. Apparently, he also "slipped up" and told Lovino that Arthur loved him. The reaction, he claims, was priceless.
Kiku Honda: I recommend that we add ourselves a new honorary member to Cupido Aiutanti: name, Peter Kirkland.
Feliciano Vargas: All in agreement like this comment~!
[Adrian Kirkland and 7 others like this comment]
Feliciano Vargas: Sending the invitation right now~
Peter Kirkland has joined the group Cupido Aiutanti.
(Mobile) Peter Kirkland: Cool! So, uh, what is this group anyway?
Feliciano Vargas: We'll give you a proper initiation a little bit later, okay~?
Peter Kirkland: Okay!
(Mobile/Mobile) Nachalo Zima || Thanatos Winter: THANATOS. UNLOCK THE DAMN CAR DOOR.
Thanatos Winter: Mother of God, General. You scared me.
Nachalo Zima: Sorry. Two questions: one, was that a convincing death? And two, are you any good with scissors?
Thanatos Winter: You mentioned this. I'm cutting your hair right?
Thanatos Winter: And yeah, you are pretty good. Nice job.
Nachalo Zima: You're still not gonna tell me where you got it, huh.
Thanatos Winter: It's best you didn't know.
Nachalo Zima: Fine. You're telling me later, though.
Thanatos Winter: -_- Damn creeper. So now what? Run like all hell?
Nachalo Zima: No. Before we run, I want to see something first.
Thanatos Winter: No.
Nachalo Zima: I didn't even say what it was yet. :(
Thanatos Winter: Oh my God. NO. You are not going to see that stupid Asian kid! No, no, NO.
Nachalo Zima: Shishishi~
Thanatos Winter: NO.
Nachalo Zima: Shishishishi~
Thanatos Winter: ... Put the saw DOWN and I'll consider it...
Nachalo Zima: Okay.
Thanatos Winter: WHAT THE FUCK?! So you drop the saw onto the hood of my CAR?! BASTARD!
Nachalo Zima: Do as I say and you won't die.
Thanatos Winter: FINE! NOW GET IN AND SHUT UP!
Nachalo Zima: Okay, Mr. Captain. :3
Thanatos Winter: ... And where the hell did you get a saw from anyway?
Oh, those two. I missed writing as them, I really did. Alright, so I made a few minor changes that I'll go back and edit the rest of the chapters to fix:
ONE: Belgium's name has changed from Wilhelmina to Anri. Why? Well, for one I ended up making an original character named Wilhelmina and I didn't want to get them confused (my Wilhelmina would annoy the crap of you if I got them mixed up. Really.) and second, apparently Anri was on the list of recommended names for her on Hima-papa's blog, and I've always had a soft spot for the name Anri ever since watching Durarara! for the first time. So, I will go back and edit THAT throughout every chapter she's in.
TWO: Chereneko's name is actually spelled WRONG. (I face palmed, facedesked, and face walled once I discovered this.) The name I gave him is a recommended choice by fans for Ukraine's surname. Actually spelled Chernenko. That's C-H-E-R-N-E-N-K-O. Not. C-H-E-R-E-N-E-K-O. So that will be fixed too.
THREE: Another name change: from Aisling Kirkland for Ireland to Alannah Kirkland, simply based on preference and that at the time Aisling was the only Irish name I could think of that I could very easily spell. Alannah is simple yet still pretty, and it's an older name whereas Aisling is far more recent. I like it. ^_^ I hope you all do too.
So. Next chapter is everyone meeting up at the local hospital, loose ends are tied, friendships restored, Peter is initiated into Cupido Aiutanti (OH LORD WHAT HAVE I DONE)... and a possible rivalry. Hmm...
Until then, everyone? (Hugs and kisses to you all... I really, really missed you.)
[dalca has logged off]