Megan POV
So, after another month of gaining the courage I finally managed to build up the courage to talk to Remus about how things were going with Tonks, like Severus had told me too, and let's just say it didn't go very well. He had told me that he was extremely happy and that everything was going amazingly. I got the feeling there was something else he wanted to tell me as well but I was most likely imagining it.
I spent the next year pretty much alone. I lived by myself now and only spent time with anyone when the Order grouped together for meetings.
It had turned out that Severus was a spy working for Voldemort which surprised us all, except Harry who had suspected it since last Christmas.
Harry had disappeared with his two friends off looking for Horcruxes and although I was worried about him, I had every faith that he would be successful.
Remus and Tonks had had a baby which only confirmed to me that their relationship was completely serious and that I now had literally no chance to ever get him back. As you can imagine, I was very upset about this and almost went into another one of my depressions again but I was ok in the end. It just hurt to see sometimes.
I was sitting in the kitchen/dining area of the burrow when Remus walked in and smiled at me. I smiled weakly back before looking back down at my cup of tea.
"Everything ok with Teddy?" I asked quietly when Remus sat down opposite me with a cup of his own tea.
"Good thank you." He responded. "Tonks is just putting him to sleep."
I nodded slowly, still not looking up. "Ahhh."
"I actually have been meaning to ask you something." He said after a long and very awkward silence.
"You have?" I said with surprise. I lifted my mug and took a sip from the now cold tea. I stood up and tipped the reminder down the sink and rinsed the mug.
"Yes." He drew in a breath. "I would understand if you said no but..." He paused.
"What?"
"Would you be Teddy's Godmother?" Did he really just ask that? He wants me to be the godmother of his child, a child that came from a relationship that tore my heart to shreds.
"You want me to be his Godmother?" I asked, just to make sure I heard him right.
"I understand if that isn't what you want but with the war thickening he needs someone to be there for him if something were to happen to Tonks and I. I have asked Harry as well so you won't be the only one."
"Ok." I blurted and mentally scolded myself for my rash actions. I couldn't take it back now.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, as long as Tonks doesn't think it is weird."
"It was half her idea."
"I see." I said and forced a smile when he thanked me and left the room. I then pinched myself in the side as a form of punishment for my stupidity.
Remus POV
I must be an idiot. There is no other word for it. I had just asked the women I had been in a twenty year relationship with and still loved to be the Godmother of my child. I was, to be perfectly honest, screwed. I wouldn't be unfaithful to Tonks and cheat on her because that would be wrong on so many levels and I couldn't break things off with her because we had Teddy now and it wouldn't be fair for him to grow up with his parents divorced. It wasn't that I didn't love Tonks anymore, it was just that I loved Megan so much more and I was a fool to not realise this until Tonks was pregnant.
"Turn the radio up Remus." Said Molly who was sitting on one of the other sofas in the living room, I hadn't been properly listening but judging but the mass of people who had suddenly gathered around to listen, there was something important on so I reached over and turned it up.
"Lightning has struck, I repeat, Lightning has struck." The voice from the radio was projected out into the room.
"Harry is at Hogwarts." Kingsley exclaimed. "We have to go there."
"You are right." Said Arthur, "And we should go now." There was a sound of unanimous agreement before we all began disapparated and appeared in Diagon Alley outside Dumbledore's Brother's place. We took the secret passageway into the castle and were greeted by a number of students who all looked quite beaten up.
To sum up the next several hours we made our appearance in front of Severus and scared him from the main hall. Voldemort attempted to bribe us all into handing Harry over and then I was sent to defend one of the towers with Kingsley from oncoming attacks in an attempt to but Harry enough time to find the remaining Horcruxes.
I stared up at the diminishing shield that had been erected up around the school when I heard footstep to my left. I turned to see Tonks running towards me.
"You shouldn't have come." I shouted as she jumped into my arms. "It's Teddy who needs you."
"He will sleep till dawn and snore like his father." She said as we continued to hug. She then pulled back and stroked my face gently. "It's you that needs me tonight." She said but then a frown crossed her face. "Something's wrong."
"Nothing is wrong." I said with a slight laugh, I wasn't going to tell her I was still madly in love with Megan, it would destroy her.
"I know you Remus." She placed a light kiss on my lips. "Something is bothering you." I shook my head but I know I didn't convince her otherwise. "Well, whatever it is you should do whatever would make you happiest."
"Even if it would hurt some of the people I love most?" I asked. She tilted her head to the side.
"What is it Remus? You can tell me." Actually you are the one person I can't tell, I thought to myself.
"I can't."
"Please."
"Ok, fine. I am still in love with Megan." I said quickly and instantly regretted it when I saw the hurt expression on her face.
"Oh."
"It doesn't change how I feel about you." I reached forward and caressed her cheek.
"I know." She reached a hand up and hugged the hand I had on her cheek and closed her eyes. "I was a fool to think you would every love me more than her."
"No you weren't." I said softly. "And I never said I loved her more than you."
"But you do don't you." I dropped my gaze to the floor unable to meet her eyes because of the truth in her words. She put a finger on my chin and lifted my head so I was forced to look at her.
"You know what you have got to do." She whispered. "You need to tell her. Who am I to stand in the way of true love? You should be with her." How can she be so understanding? I had expected screaming and shouting and crying at this but instead there was only sadness reflected in her eyes.
"But Teddy..."
"He would be better off growing up with a happy father who lives with another woman than with his parents still together but unhappy." She said sadly but forced a smile on her face none the less. "Of course I will miss not being with you Remus but in a situation like this it cannot be helped."
"Thank you." I muttered.
"You need to go and find her now." She began to push me to the stairs that lead down the tower. "I think she is somewhere by the main hall where the fighting has already begun." I nodded and ran down the stairs in the direction Tonks had pointed me in. I was so lucky that she had been so understanding because things could have been a hell of a lot worse.
The main hall was packed full of fighting students teacher and death eaters. As I ran I had to block so many spells that came my way and I sent a few disarming spells out as well. Then I saw Megan. She had just disarmed a bald and rather chubby death eater before turning to see me. I smiled at her and in that split second while my guard was dropped, a death eater whom I believed to be called Dolohov shot a purple spell at me.
It didn't hurt much (well not in comparison to my monthly transformations did) but I could feel my consciousness slipping away. But I could hear Megan scream my name and I saw a blur of her running towards me. I was about to die, that much I was sure of and my only regret was that I didn't have enough time to tell Megan how much I loved her, how much I wanted her back, that caused me more pain than any spell or any full moon could throw at me. She was my last thought as my vision faded to blackness.
I actually cried while writing that last bit! Sorry about the cliffhanger again.
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