Stan and I then start playing football (Let's just say I whopped his sorry butt!), we then eat a snack of Cheesy Poofs. Well, I eat a snack of Cheesy Poofs. "I don't know how you can eat these and not be fat." Stan says to me "Well," I start "I exercise a lot so my parents let me have them anytime I want." "Like Cartman," he snickers "except for exercising" Before I can ask who the heck "Cartman" is, we both hear a doorbell ring and I follow Stan to the door to see who it is.
When Stan opens the door I see a kid about our age in an orange parka and orange pants. "Hi!" I hear him say, but, not really say because the parka hood covers all of his face but his eyes, so he really muffles "Who's this?" "Oh, hi Kenny, this is my cousin, her name is Spencer." Stan says. "Well," he replies giving me the twice over "You can come over anytime!". What the h*$# is wrong with this kid! He's in 4th grade!
"What?!" I reply, then to break the tension (or try to), I say " Where do you live anyway?" "There." he muffles while pointing at a house that looks, in all words, poor. I suddenly see an explanation for his parka being a bit patched and dirty. To make a joke, I start singing "In The Ghetto" by Elvis. "This is like a girl version of a slightly nicer Cartman." Kenny muffles. Again before I can ask who the heck this Cartman guy is, the doorbell rings. When Stan opens the door, this time it is another kid our age wearing a green ushanka, an orange jacket, and dark green pants. From conversation between him and Stan I can tell that his name is Kyle.
After some awkward moments of silence Stan introduces me to Kyle and I say hello. After that I quickly notice the small Jewish star sewn on the sleeve of Kyle's jacket. To interrupt the next moment I say to Kyle "Can I have some of your Jew gold?" "WHAT?" he exclaims "Every Jew keeps a sac around their neck that contains their Jew gold, can I have some of yours?" I reply knowingly. To reply back he says "Did Cartman put you up to this? 'Cause ITS ON B****!"
Before I know it Stan is holding me back and Kenny is holding Kyle back while he's screaming "MUFF-CABBAGE!" whatever that means, but I've already given him two black eyes and am yelling "RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH!". While we are both fight, I see a fat kid walking up to us who I think is Cartman out of the corner of my eye. He seems really cute, so I stop fighting to look. Before I know it, everything's black, but the last thing I see is Cartman looking down on me with a look on his face that seems… smitten?