I want to thank my incredible Beta cookie-monster-kiki, for helping to make this story even better.
Chapter Two
Even after years of being free of having to spend his nights in the orphanage or on the streets of the Capitol, Peeta still found himself as a light sleeper, the fear of having to defend an onslaught of abuse was always a constant.
When he had first moved into his home located in twelve he had been fifteen, newly plucked out of poverty and sent to a district he was never aware existed.
The extent of his knowledge had grown. It didn't in any way change the fact that he was still a frightened child who had to struggle to survive; only now the means to go by it were less honest than stealing.
His nightmares never ceased, the content only changed; their presence in his sub-conscience one of the only constants in his life.
He had first awakened earlier in the night from one of his night terrors, the vivid sensation of roaming hands made his heart drop, his throat becoming dry and restricted. The small sheen of sweat on his forehead rolled from his face onto his pillow, causing him to roll over to his other side as he wiped his face with the back of his hand.
Peeta kept his eyes closed as he concentrated on trying to fall back asleep, which to his dismay was fleeting and out of his reach. When he heard the squeaking of the boards beside his bed it alerted him to someone else in the room.
With his eyes still closed he groaned, his annoyance taking over his need to rest. Peeta assumed Haymitch had been sleep walking again, something he did on a regular basis especially after a night of heavy drinking.
Peeta allowed the older man to reside in one of the servant housings, which remained on the property from when it was used for dignitaries who spent their holidays in the district before it had become run down.
This time of the season was always worse for the man, a time of the year where the memory of his wife Maysilee haunted him more than usual. Peeta would find him passed out on the middle of the floor, his body in the fetal position.
In most cases it was best to allow him to sleep it off, but the stress of the previous day and the one soon to come was beginning to wear on him.
His patience was fleeting and he wasn't in the mood to humor an exhausting albeit harmless drunk.
He sighed before opening eyes, his shoulders tensing in case Haymitch was to become agitated, which sometimes he did if the spirits were especially strong.
The thick darkness of the room clouded his vision as he attempted to make out the form a few feet from the side of his bed. It took a few seconds for the shape to come into focus; his eyes were weighed down and heavy from barely being able to sustain a couple hours of rest.
It didn't take long for him to realize that the outline wasn't Haymitch's usually hunched over shoulders forming into a wide chest. Instead the form was petite with delicate lines which could only belong to a woman. Instinctively, Peeta reached for the top of the nightstand where a familiar item sat.
Her voice was quiet but it still cut through the silence of the room, "It isn't there anymore."
Peeta closed his eyes; his brow creasing as he mentally scolded himself for being so careless.
He cleared his throat as he inched his fingers over to the bedside lamp, pressing the silver button," Well, then where is it?"
The sudden assault of the artificial light caused his eyes to strain before his vision adjusted. His hand remained by the lamp, his body midway on the night stand, while the rest of his side remained on the mattress.
Her hair was tangled and wild from sleep. Half of the dark mess had fallen over the left side of her face but a few strands had parted where her eyes were allowing the deep gray color of her iris's to show through.
The silk nightshirt of his was wrinkled, as half of it was tucked into the waist line of the cloth shorts. Peeta moved his eyes down the rest of her body, finally stopping at her feet.
Her toes were caked with mud, and even in the dimly lit room he could see the sheen of dew at her ankles. He assumed she had been outside. Most likely she had attempted to leave, but with the thick darkness and her minimal knowledge of the area, she had ultimately decided against it.
However when Peeta's eyes travelled to her right hand, he questioned whether escaping was her actual intention. The blade in her hand reflected the light and he had to stop himself from advancing on her.
He had to remind himself of the aggression she had shown towards the Peacekeepers, because even if he could over power her, he wouldn't make the mistake of underestimating the traumatized girl.
Peeta kept his movements slow and deliberate as he watched her closely, studying her face. With a pace that made him ache, Peeta turned his body to rest on his back before he pulled himself up with the blanket, his back against the headboard.
Katniss' eyes darted around frantically reminding Peeta of a frightened animal. He was certain if he couldn't keep his calm that the situation could become dire very quickly.
Katniss' body began to shake as the cool boards of the room mingled with the dampness of her feet. She curled her toes into the floor boards as her legs began to pimple with goose bumps.
It was difficult for her to keep her body still from the shaking, the handle of the blade rubbing against her palm as her grip loosened.
She felt small and insignificant under his gaze and she wasn't sure if the tremors were actually from the temperature or something else entirely.
Peeta swung his legs over the edge slowly, careful not to tangle himself in the bedding and most importantly not to startle the armed girl standing only a few feet in front of him.
Peeta straightened his back as he curled his fingers over the edge of the mattress. Her shaking started to increase causing the blade to gently knock against her bare leg. Peeta could see the situation escalating if he didn't attempt to deflate the tension.
Therefore, he did the one thing he was gifted with: he attempted to distract her until he was able to gain opposition.
"I'm no threat to you. There's no need for that."
"I didn't go through all the pain of surviving to become one of those girls."
"What?"
Katniss stepped forward, the blade waving in the air between them," Men would come to the orphanage looking for girls promising them a life but they lied. They would send them back and something was different," Peeta could see the tears welling up in her eyes, the gray setting afire," I won't let you do that to me. I'll die first."
Peeta tried to calm his voice and was surprised by the slight crack," Katniss that isn't why I brought you here."
Her shaking became wild as the blade followed her motions," I saw you watching me dress."
Peeta hoped she couldn't see the flush riding up his throat from his chest as his skin heated up from embarrassment.
"That was by accident. I would never intentionally force myself onto someone."
She jumped forward as Peeta jumped back out of reflex, his back bent slightly to avoid the point of the blade.
"I saw you!"
Agitation began to set in and it soon took precedence over his fear," Do you really think if that's what I wanted I would have chosen you?" He could feel his chest tighten when her eyes fell partially before locking eyes with him," And even if I had, why would I have taken the time to take you here? When all I could have done was just raped you in the alleyway, it's not like anyone would have cared. You're just street trash. Isn't that what you think of yourself?"
"I—"
Her face fell as the blade along with her arm began to lower. Peeta could see her defenses fall giving him the opportunity to take the dominant foothold in the situation.
In a swift movement he sprung forward, his right hand reaching for her wrist before curling his fingers around her petite structure. Peeta bent her wrist back so that the blade was farthest away from him. Katniss didn't have enough time to react before he pulled her forward flipping her body over to the mattress.
She hit the bed, the air escaping her lungs, her eyes shut tight. She could feel the weight of his body on hers before she opened her eyes. His chest pressed into hers causing the pressure to intensify as her breasts heaved, her breathing becoming quick and sporadic.
She opened her eyes slowly with her grip tightening on the blade as he still held onto her wrist. Katniss looked into his face, his stormy blue eyes were only inches from hers, the tip of his nose touched hers, and his warm breath lingered on her face.
She attempted to kick her legs out trying to free herself but the weight of his body didn't allow any room of movement. She was trapped.
Peeta's left hand held her shoulder down as he leaned in against her. She writhed underneath him, her knees connecting with his pelvis. Peeta gritted his teeth in pain before pushing the hand containing the blade farther into the mattress.
Katniss turned her head to each side, her dark hair striking him in the face as it tangled in both their mouths.
"Let me go!"
"Not until you listen!"
Katniss stopped struggling as she settled her face back up towards his. Peeta released her shoulder to brush her hair to the side; his fingers gently pulled the strands from her face.
Katniss was stunned by how gentle he was being with her. His eyes softened for a few seconds before shifting back to his previous expression.
"What was the plan, to stab me in my sleep?"
"You're the one who sleeps with a knife beside your bed."
"So you just came to where I normally would be asleep and decided to pick the blade up?" He searched her face, her gray eyes threatening to swallow him whole."What are you Katniss, a murderer?"
She could feel her pulse racing," I—"
Peeta shook his head, the ends of his bangs tickling the sides of her face," No, you're not. If you were, you wouldn't have waited for me to wake up. You're just a scared kid who doesn't understand how one choice can change everything you are."
"I understand enough."
"You can be more than someone just trying to survive. I can help you achieve a place in this world."
"How, I'm just street trash remember?"
"I think we both know you're more than that."
"How do I know I can trust you?"
Peeta searched her face, his eyes landing on her lips," You don't. But that's what trust is, believing in something."
"So you expect me to believe in someone who has me pinned to his bed?"
"Yes, and remember I'm not the one armed right now."
Peeta sighed before wrenching the blade from her grasp to toss it back to the night stand. He then pulled her up into a sitting position, his legs still straddling hers.
Peeta backed up, placing his feet onto the floor boards. Katniss was defenseless under his strength as he dragged her from the bed easily.
Her feet hit the floor with a thud stubbing one of her toes in the process. Peeta pulled her behind him as he pushed her through the door, her body not stopping until her hands fell flat against the nearest wall of the hallway.
Katniss turned around to face him terrified that he may have decided to punish her for her aggression. They both stood there for the longest time watching the other until Peeta let out a deep breath, his eyes looking defeated.
"Get some rest Katniss, and don't attempt to enter my room again or you and I will be having an entirely different talk."
Katniss watched as he slammed his bedroom doors shut, the sound of a lock clicking echoed around her. She leaned her head against the wall before sliding down into a seated position.
She hadn't initially gone into his room to harm him; she had watched him for the longest time before he had woken up.
He confused her, even intrigued her, and she supposed that more than anything, that is what made her turn back from her escape. Katniss closed her eyes. Everything was overwhelming. The way he watched her sometimes, the way his eyes would soften, how warm his body felt on hers.
She had wanted to pull him close but realized how unusual such an act would have been after holding a blade to him. Then again, Katniss had become accustomed to the bizarre. It was what she felt comfortable in.
Inside the room, Peeta let his hand linger at the lock before he slid his body down the length of the doors. His bottom hit the floor softly before he drew his knees to his body.
He could feel his anxiety rise, his breath quickening much like it did when he was younger after his visits to the Capitol.
He hadn't had an attack for years, and in one day with this one girl, everything was turning on its side. He had tried to ignore the tingling sensation traveling up his body by having her so close.
She made everything cloudy and he was desperate not to lose himself in her.
However it wasn't his well being he was afraid for, it was hers. Peeta was only half a man, an incomplete person, and he knew from the moment he had seen her that she deserved better.
He had awoken with both of his arms haphazardly spread to each side as his legs pushed against the locked doors of his bedroom, his face turned to the side.
Peeta laid there for a few minutes before he planted his hands to the floor boards, a deep groan escaping his lips.
He assumed he must have collapsed on the floor after falling asleep against the doors. His legs were unsteady as he wobbled from side to side for a bit, his hand going to his cheek where deep indentations from the floor were now imprinted there.
When he had righted his footing, he drew his hands through his blonde hair, his fingers catching on a few tangles.
Peeta turned to the door, contemplating if leaving the safety of his room was wise. He had no idea if their altercation had ceased her anger or had merely thrown fuel on the fire so to speak.
He eventually decided against hiding out in his room from the petite girl, reaching for the doors and unlatching the lock.
He drew the doors back half expecting her to be in the hallway ready to lash out at him again. However the empty hallway made his chest tighten for a second before he made his way down to the room she had been given.
He was annoyed at how anxious he was to see her again. He had to keep reminding himself that he was excited to see a girl who had attempted to assault him the night before.
The walk to the room was shorter than he would have liked. His hand lingered at the open door before he pushed it open. Peeta walked through and noticed the bed hadn't been slept in, the quilted bedding still turned down from when Hazelle had done so the night before.
He walked to the center of the room and circled around before concluding that she must be in another part of the house. Then again, most likely she had left altogether.
He was nearly to the door when he noticed something lying on the nightstand. The worn edges of the leather binding peeled away from the spine, the color darker on the inside.
His footsteps were heavy as he traveled over to the far side of the room, stopping next to the nightstand.
He ran his fingers over the cover. The battered book was worn with tears and yellowing on the edges of the pages.
He looked around for the girl positive she wouldn't have left without the book. This was something she had been willing to risk her life for, she wouldn't leave it.
Peeta contemplated going to search for her but his curiosity had gotten the better of him. He reached for the object and picked it up.
It was small and felt fragile in his hands. He turned it around in his palm before righting it.
With a careful touch he pulled the cover open before flipping through the pages. It seemed to be a children's story, illustrations of forests and fairies were filled through its pages.
There was also scribbling, the handwriting appearing to be done by a child's hand. The worn binding fell open to the middle of the book on which a fairy sat idle on the page.
Peeta felt his stomach drop and for a time everything went bright as nausea settled at his throat.
The memory of being in a cold room with a girl with gray eyes while he scratched the scene into the wall of chipped paint rushed through his mind.
"Here even if they take the book from you, you can still have the fairies surround you."
Peeta felt so foolish for not recognizing her or the book before, although it had been years before and his years of trauma had blocked out most of his early memories.
He felt ashamed for leaving her, and even though he had now found her, it didn't lessen his depth of humiliation. Because he hadn't been strong enough to stay with her, to protect her, she had suffered. Peeta closed the book and set it back down, his fingers lingering at the spine.
It had been almost three weeks since he had snuck back into the orphanage to see her.
He had stolen the book from one of the booksellers. He had wanted something to occupy his time while he hid out on one of the rooftops.
He had enjoyed the stories about magic and love; it made him think of the young girl with the gray eyes.
He had begun to sneak into the room. At first she had clung to the wall watching him as Peeta would just rattle off stories he made up, scratching them into the wall.
She would glide her tiny fingers over the markings while considering him. Eventually he knew he had won her trust when she crawled over to him one night to bring his arm over her shoulder.
He had tensed at first, surprised by her, but it wasn't long until he tightened his arm around her.
He spoke into her hair until she fell asleep. It was then that Peeta Mellark, at age thirteen, fell in love with the girl with no name.
When he had given her the book she looked at it with curiosity, studying it in his hands before slowly taking it into her own.
Peeta was caught off guard when she leaned up to him on her bare toes and gently touched her lips to his in a soft chaste kiss. She then lowered herself to her feet, taking him into a hug.
He had slowly wrapped his gangly arms around her thin waist. She had let go before him and sat down thumbing through the pages.
He had sat down beside her, eventually taking the book to act out all of the parts with funny voices that made her giggle, causing her freckled nose to wrinkle.
Peeta placed the book on the stand pushing the memories aside. He could feel himself begin to panic.
He breathed in deep willing himself to settle down and when he was sure he had his bearings, Peeta knelt down looking under the bed. It came up empty other then the few boxes of quilts that Hazelle had stored there years before.
Peeta stood up walking toward the door when he had the thought to search the closet. It was small and he doubted that she would choose to go there but he didn't see the harm in looking.
When he reached the doors, he pushed them apart to find a dark head of hair fanned above her.
She was laying on her side, her hands and knees pushed into her stomach.
Her face was flushed and he could see the tear tracks there, her feet still muddy. He wondered if she had gone outside again before coming into the closet.
She looked almost peaceful with her body wrapped within itself. He wanted to reach out and trace the lines of her cheekbones; the shock of finding her after all these years surreal.
He wanted to wake her up and tell her who he really was, the boy who had taken care of her, who had fallen in love with her before he even knew what love was. But he was also the boy who had left her, who abandoned her because of his own weakness.
Peeta backed up closing the doors, his hands holding on far longer than need be. He knew it wasn't fair to her to bring the matter up.
She needed the opportunity to leave her past behind and he wouldn't be the reason which caused her to relive it.
However, when he walked out of the room he contemplated if he was simply protecting her or if his reason for not telling her was that he was too much of a coward to face the past himself.
The walls felt as though they would close around him, forever suffocating him. He had assumed finding her after all these years would make him feel joy but instead, all he felt was panic and dread.
He wasn't the boy he had been when they would protect each other from the darkness.
He had lost that sense of self and without her, Peeta had been swallowed whole by the monsters in the shadows.
Having her in the house was now torture because all he could focus on was the question of whether her lips were still soft and if they were the perfect ratio to his as they had been when they were younger.
He leaned forward gently knocking his head against the dark blue painted walls of the dining room. He needed to understand that giving into his feelings or his curiosity was something he didn't have the luxury to explore.
He had made his decisions a long time ago and he had to come to terms with the fact he would never be able to give into wants no matter how much he desired to do so.
Peeta stepped back from the wall, his hands out behind him. The edge of the cherry stained dinning table met his fingers and he curled his fingers over the lip of the wood, his nails scraping the underside.
It took him a moment before he realized the steady breathing in the room didn't belong to him, his back straightened and his nails dug deep into the wood.
He slowly turned around as he willed himself to stay calm, careful not to alert her to a shift in their relationship.
Peeta mentally scolded himself for assuming they had ever had anything that classified as a relationship, especially due to the fact what he needed to be practicing was emotional distance.
His hands shifted as he settled in, using the table as a brace. Instantly his eyes connected with hers, the gray burning into him, causing his stomach to drop.
Her hair was disheveled and a few of the top buttons on the night shirt had come undone revealing the slightest bit of cleavage.
Deep olive skin stretched over her clavicle only to stop at the smallest hint of the top curve of her breast. With his height, he was able to see over the table to her feet which were still dark with mud.
Katniss was nervous under his gaze and assumed he was trying to hide his disappointment over her appearance.
She reached up and attempted to smooth her hair down, the tips of her fingers moving the strands behind her ears. She couldn't help but notice the difference in his attire, a contrast to how she had first seen him in his dark suit.
His hair now fell free, ashen blonde bangs laid against his cheek bones instead of being brushed back. And the cotton button up he wore in a light blue color made his eyes noticeable. He almost seemed human to her, organic and real.
Peeta watched her study him, he could feel his anxiety rise as he panicked that she had pieced something together.
Katniss shuffled her feet, the boards of the floor making her feet tingle. She lowered her head, her voice catching in her throat.
She could feel her body shaking again, partly from being ashamed of her actions from before and partly from having him watch her so closely.
Taking one last deep breath, Katniss looked back up to him," I want to have a place in this world." His gaze was cutting through her as she looked away flittingly before looking back to him," I don't want to be invisible anymore."
Peeta nodded. He closed his eyes briefly as he needed a short break from the intense connection that was beginning to form.
"I'm in need of a hand maiden."
Katniss let out a small scoff," No. I've seen those women, ladies of standing who trail behind companions with their propriety and grace when in reality they allow themselves to be auctioned off to men of wealth who use them as breeding partners and silent trophies. It would just be another way to not be seen," Katniss down casted her eyes," I can't go back to that."
Peeta sighed, releasing the table to walk around the corner to stand at her side. With every step towards her he could feel his pulse race, his shoulders tensed and he hoped his voice was calm.
"It wouldn't be like that."
"How can you be so sure?"
Peeta flexed his fingers before reaching out gently to touch her elbow, bringing her attention to him.
"Because I wouldn't let that happen." Katniss tensed under his touch causing Peeta to pull back." You're safe here."
Katniss looked up to him at her side," Even if I wanted to. Even if I agreed, there's no way I would be permitted. I'm a district born not to mention an orphan. To those bred in the Capitol I'm the lowest of the low."
"I'm a district born and I was permitted to be a companion."
"Yes, but you're special."
Peeta was thrown by how soft her voice had come out. He returned the sentiment," So are you."
Katniss blushed," I'm not sure that I could ever fit into that world."
Peeta was lost in the softness of her face, how disarmed she was with him," I can teach you all of those things."
"Alright."
"But there have to be rules," Peeta waited for her to speak but she merely watched him," You have to be patient and trust everything I tell and teach you as it is for your own good. You can't decide to just run off. I need you to believe me when I tell you that you're safe which goes to show that trying to attack me with my own knife is definitely not something that will happen again."
Katniss' eyes drifted to his chest as she bit her bottom lip," Alright." She looked up to him, her eyes hard," But know this; I'm not going to lose myself. I won't become something that they want me to be."
"Sometimes you do."
Katniss looked up to him her brow creased," It depends on how much you sacrifice."
Peeta's lips formed into a slight sad smile," I wish that were true."
They both stood there watching the other, neither one speaking; only sounds of their breathing filled the room.
Peeta wanted to reach out to her again, caress her face and tell her how she was so much more than what the Capitol had turned her into. He could see the strength in her to the point he found himself envious of her.
Katniss could feel the flush rising up her face, her body warming underneath his looks. She curled her toes as he broke their connection to move his eyes up and down her body.
The air between them was beginning to thin and Katniss couldn't help but squirm. Peeta lifted his head watching her for a few more seconds before speaking.
"We have a lot of work to do and in the state your appearance is in, it'll be a miracle if it didn't take days to correct," Katniss moved her head to side cursing the tears threatening to fill her eyes," I'm going to go contact the stylist who helps me, hopefully he has some free time."
Peeta turned on his heel as Katniss gritted her teeth trying to push her anger down.
When his back was turned he closed his eyes. He was ashamed of his words but knew he had to maintain this relationship as a business venture and nothing else.
He made his way to his study where the lone telephone was kept. Speaking over his shoulder, he kept his voice cold and clipped.
"Eat something. I don't want you fainting from hunger during waxing and wasting everyone's time."
He didn't dare look back at her, not being able to be near her again. Looking into her eyes would only prompt him to pull her to his body.
When he reached the door to his study, Peeta placed his hands flat against the surface attempting to steady him. In this moment the floor was giving out and he could feel himself endlessly falling.
The room smelled of perfumes and cleansers, which only made the need to vomit increase. Her skin burned from the constant assault of waxing and tweezing.
Her body already felt foreign. The sensations traveling up her body made her uncomfortable as the prep team Peeta had called in plucked and poked.
After Peeta had left her in the dining room, she stood in the room seething at his cold demeanor toward her. She wasn't positive how long she had been standing until Hazelle had entered the house.
The older brunette had been shocked at first to find the young girl standing in the middle of the room in her nightclothes, her feet caked with mud while her hair was in tangles around the back of her scalp.
However it didn't take long for Hazelle's gentle face to form a smile, holding her hand out to Katniss.
Katniss took it cautiously, allowing the woman to lead her into the kitchen. She directed her to one of the wooden stools pushed up under the island located in the middle of the kitchen.
With her free hand Hazelle pulled out the stool helping the girl up, her muddy toes curling on the legs.
Katniss let go of Hazelle's hand, her hands holding onto the edge of the elongated table.
Katniss was taken aback when a small loaf of nut bread was placed in front of her.
She looked up to see Hazelle smile at her gently before she began to work around the kitchen beginning her duties for the day.
Katniss stared at the bread. She was still wary if she should take food that was offered to her. It was something foreign to her, as was any human contact, and she had to admit, it made her want to panic.
"You should eat dear, because when the prep team and Cinna arrive, I doubt they'll allow you to take a snack break." Hazelle turned her back to Katniss, she began muttering to herself as she rummaged through the cabinets." Lord knows, for people who look so ridiculous you would think the whole lot of them would be a little more cheery. Except for Cinna, even with his eye liner, he's a lovely man."
Katniss picked at the bread placing the pieces into her mouth as she listened to Hazelle mutter and complain. She swung her legs back and forth watching Hazelle work.
A little while later Peeta walked into the room after being absent for most of the morning.
She intentionally diverted her eyes from him as he came to stand beside her. She could feel his arm brush against hers and she cursed the way her body reacted to his touch, even if it was fleeting.
It wasn't long until a group of bizarre dressed individuals carrying large cases burst through the back door entering the kitchen.
Katniss nearly fell off the stool. Peeta's hands braced her back, his fingers wrinkling the silk and causing it to rub against her skin.
They were talking and laughing loudly until they laid eyes on the petite girl, her hair and eyes wild.
Katniss swore she heard the pale green dyed women gasp while the other woman and man looked disgusted.
Katniss held very little patience for Capitol citizens, their gluttony and narcissism infuriated her.
She narrowed her eyes at their expressions before a well dressed man walked around them to stand at her side opposite of Peeta.
He introduced himself as Cinna. Shortly after taking Katniss by the arm, leading her up to where Peeta's master bathroom was.
She had looked up to Peeta for help but he only moved his eyes away from her.
Everything had been a blur after that, her body aching from the assault.
She had immediately been stripped of her clothing after entering the large bathroom. The wrinkled night shirt and shorts fell to the white tiles. Katniss covered her body embarrassed at how vulnerable she was in front of total strangers.
She was been thrown into the large tub of warm soapy bubbles and met by hands that were rough and urgent. An array of scrubs and soaps were applied to her skin. Katniss could see the water begin to brown.
Even with the bath that Hazelle had made her take the night before, her skin still held grim from years of neglect.
She had slapped their hands away more than once, occasionally splashing the water towards them. Katniss vaguely remembers sticking her tongue out at the one they called Octavia, when she had commented on how it was beyond her how someone could be comfortable with being so disgusting.
After she had been pulled from the tub, her skin raw and shiny, she had been pushed into the gold rimmed seat in front of a large vanity.
The cotton of the towel around her was useless at keeping the cool draft traveling through the bathroom.
The male of the trio pulled out a pair of scissors clipping at her dark hair as he also combed through it, moans of agitation escaping his lips.
Katniss had closed her eyes hoping they weren't going to turn her into one of the horrendous figures she had seen in the Capitol.
When her scalp was being ravaged by the slim man with the shears, her nails were filed and painted a light pink shade.
While one of the women filed, the other continued to pluck the dark hairs overgrown at her brows. It was torture for her to sit there while she was pulled from one side or the other. She was powerless and it irritated her.
After she had been pinched by the tweezers a second time, Katniss looked over to the green colored woman.
"If you pinch me again, I may have to stab you with those tweezers."
All three of them had gasped almost overpowering the small echo of laughter. Cinna was leaning against the door frame.
After the prep team was done with their beauty routine, Cinna escorted them out.
Katniss was glad to see them leave. She was tired of their side way glances toward each other.
Cinna walked over to her bringing her out of the chair, her now sleek wavy hair falling over her shoulders.
Katniss scratched at her back squirming as Cinna circled her.
"Why does my body itch so much?"
"It's been exfoliated; a new layer of skin is needed for its health. You'll get used to it."
"I feel like one big bruise. I never knew hair removal was so important."
Cinna shook his head as he headed over to a large leather trunk. He opened it pulling out a few items. He walked in front of her holding out something peculiar, one of its straps hanging from his hand.
"What's that?"
"It's an undergarment called a bra. You wear it under your clothing against your breasts."
Katniss made a face," Is this really necessary?"
"Yes, and just to warn you, the underwire will be uncomfortable at first but you will get used to it."
Katniss rolled her eyes before taking the garmet from him," I doubt it." She watched him walk back over to lay a few dresses down over the edge of the trunk." Do you think I can do this?" Katniss asked. Cinna raised an eyebrow as he looked to the article of clothing in her hand." Not the bra. Do you think I can fit into the world of the Capitol, that I can pull this off?"
Cinna stood up watching her closely," I don't know yet, but Peeta seems to believe you can and I've come to trust his judgment. So if he has faith in you, so do I."
Katniss nodded before straightening her back determined," Alright, now how does the blasted thing go on one's body?"
Peeta leaned against the door frame watching Hazelle attempt to navigate around the prep team as they gossiped and complained about how it was difficult to find certain body dyes that enhanced one's aura.
He knew how irritated Hazelle was by how she continuously cleaned the same spot of the counter.
He glanced up towards the stair case anticipating how she would look when Cinna had finished with her.
Peeta had to remind himself of how this wasn't something he should be concerned about. Although every time he thought of her, he could feel a blush rushing up his cheeks.
The prep team was too busy to notice but not Hazelle. She watched him with knowing smiles when she wasn't rolling her eyes at the others.
He almost didn't notice Cinna walking into the room, his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Cinna stopped short as he motioned for her to ascend the stairs.
"Come on lovely, everyone is waiting."
Hazelle walked around the island to stand at the door frame, as Peeta turned towards the stairs. He could only see her feet at first, a pair of delicate white sandals on.
His eyes traveled up her body as she stepped down the stairs slowly, the hem of her white summer dress moved and wisped against her knees, purple flowers embroidered into the fabric. When she made it to the last step Peeta had to stop himself from sighing.
The top of the dress was much more restricting, easily showing off a bit of cleavage, as her dark hair fell around her shoulders in waves.
She was stunning. Her face was now clear and he could see the freckles sprinkled across the bridge of her nose and onto her cheeks.
Katniss stood there self-consciously as she watched Peeta stare at her closely. She felt unnerved and she wanted desperately to know what he was thinking.
His bangs had fallen into his eyes again and she wanted to walk over and clear her view of his blue eyes. She closed her eyes annoyed with where her mind would go when it concerned him.
She opened her eyes when she heard someone walking towards her. Hazelle's kind face stopped in front of hers.
"You look lovely dear, absolutely beautiful, but you always were."
Katniss smiled at her gratefully," Thank you."
Hazelle stood by Katniss' side wrapping her arm around the girl," Peeta, doesn't she look wonderful?"
Peeta cleared his throat before studying her again," You look," he swallowed before he tensed his shoulders," It's an improvement."
Katniss' shoulders fell as Hazelle gave her a reassuring squeeze before ushering everyone into the den for a cup of tea, leaving Peeta and Katniss alone.
The silence was deafening and only made her feel even lonelier than she had previously. She turned to walk out of the room, leaving Peeta in his place at the door frame.
He watched her leave, her dark hair brushing against the bare skin of her back where the dress didn't cover.
Peeta had wanted to reach for her, brush her hair away from her face, before telling her how incredibly beautiful she was. He knew however, that showing her affection wouldn't help her; it would only hinder her chances of having a better life.
The sun shined down through the leaves casting a contrast of shadows and light on her face. She giggled lightly finding it hard to contain her glee.
Katniss felt alive amongst the trees, her back pressed into the cool earth as fallen leaves surrounded her. The scents and sounds of the forest enveloped her and for the first time she felt truly free.
After Cinna and his prep team had left, incredibly impressed with their work, Peeta had left the room almost immediately as Hazelle continued her daily tasks around the home.
Katniss had sat there for the longest time contemplating if she should remain seated in the quiet den or venture out.
It wasn't until a warm breeze blew through the window lifting the gauzy curtain that Katniss could see the tree line form where she sat, thus confirming her decision.
She had been careful to not be seen, the last thing she wanted was to be lectured by Peeta about how improper it was for her to be running off into the woods.
Katniss had made it halfway at a brisk jog before she began to run with all her speed to tree line, her delicate shoes occasionally getting stuck in the mud as she made her way to her destination.
She had thrown herself onto the ground as soon as she had reached the shade provided by the trees.
Her mind raced with thoughts of contentment and confusion. Peeta had been so cold and indifferent towards her, opposite from how he had been on her journey here.
Sometimes the air would become so thin when he was near and other times she could feel his indifference towards her. He confused her. She was never quite prepared for having him near.
Katniss sighed before sitting up; a couple of leaves had tangled themselves in her thick dark hair.
She attempted in vain to brush her dress off but she was positive that the dirt from the ground had already found its place in the fibers.
She pushed herself off of the ground and made the trek back up to the house, walking quickly not wanting to be seen.
Keeping a constant pace, she was almost to the porch when a loud cracking sound startled her, gaining her attention.
Katniss ran up the steps, not stopping until she reached the wall, her body hugging the structure tightly.
She kept her hands flat as she inched closer to the corner of the porch, peering around it cautiously.
She had to squint against the sunlight shining around him as it set his blonde hair aglow.
His arms extended up into the air wielding the axe before he brought it back down against the log of wood, splitting it precisely.
Peeta bent down for another and Katniss could see the muscles of his bare back flex.
His skin was lighter than hers but he had gained a tan from working out in the sun. Unlike hers, well until the prep team had erased all her scars, the skin on his back was smooth and tight.
She watched as his broad shoulders would tense as he lifted the axe.
Katniss could feel the flush rising up her body as a slight tingling worked its way through her toes up towards her cheeks.
Peeta grunted as the blade made contact with the wood. He placed his foot at the edge, using the leverage to pull the axe free.
He had needed some release after arguing with Effie on the phone for a record hour.
She didn't see the effort in training a district born who had no formal training but Peeta argued that she had great potential and that when she succeeded; the Capitol would see how much of a visionary Effie Trinket truly was. How she was able to take a girl from the streets that was an empty shell and turn her into a lady of standing.
In the end her narcissism won out and she allowed for him to take a couple weeks absence to prepare the girl for social standing.
When he had left the study he could smell the perfume she had been wearing, she was everywhere and threatening to drown him.
Peeta wanted to find her, take her into an embrace. The need to touch her was growing and he needed to clear his head.
Therefore for the last hour he had been out by the wood pile adding to the already overwhelmed stack of fire wood.
The physical exertion would help him rest later on and he hoped being exhausted would help to take his mind off of the girl.
Peeta couldn't get the image of the way the sun dress moved against her firm skin while she walked out of his head. Or the way the hem rode up mid way to her thigh when she had sat down for tea.
He tossed the axe to the side, reaching for his shirt that was tucked into his jeans. The cloth was already damp with his sweat as Peeta moved the fabric across his forehead.
His released the material letting it fall back to place along his side before he rolled his shoulders, the muscles and joints there stiff and popping from the stress and physical exertion of the task.
Katniss felt her heart drop from her place on the porch, as he stretched and rubbed the muscles at his shoulder. The sweat between his shoulders made his skin almost glow; only making her pulse quicken.
Katniss was lost in watching him when the opening of the back porch made her jump back. The breath knocked out of her lungs as she collided with the structure of the wall.
She slowly turned her head to the right to a smiling Hazelle.
"Hello dear, I was wondering where you had run off to," Hazelle leaned over to the side easily spotting Peeta splitting wood. She leaned back over righting her stance," Admiring the scenery?"
Katniss's face became red as her eyes widened," What?"
Hazelle lifted her hand to cover her grin," The tree's dear. I see you brought some of the forest back with you."
Katniss looked down to the front of her dress, she had completely forgotten its state," Yes, I did."
Hazelle nodded trying to fight back her laughter as the girl stammered," I see. So why are you still on the porch? I would have loved the company."
Katniss' eyes widened even more as she searched for an answer," Walls!"
"Walls?"
Katniss forced a nervous toothy grin," I like walls," Katniss patted the boards behind her," A lot."
"Alright."
Katniss swallowed her eyes looking anywhere but at Hazelle," Can I go now?"
"Of course."
Katniss forced herself from the wall, as she nearly ran into the house, the screen door slamming behind her.
Hazelle shook her head laughing quietly to herself as she walked down the steps, making her way around the corner down to where Peeta was sending the blade of the axe into another log.
Each half fell by the way side as his hands gripped onto the handle.
"You do know if you do all of Haymitch's duties you'll just be paying him for nothing. It's hard enough as it is to get the man to cooperate. What's going to happen when he decides not to bother at all?"
Peeta let go of the handle before wiping his brow with the back of his hand.
"I needed something to do."
Hazelle shook her head," No, you paint or read when you need something to do. You split wood when you're frustrated or troubled," Peeta turned to her, as she folded her arms over her chest." I remember you being fifteen, trying to lift the axe above your head. When I questioned you to why you felt the need to almost impale yourself with an axe or shards of wood, you told me that—"
"That I needed to move some of the pain and grief around, I know."
"So what is it?"
Peeta shook his head," I just needed to get out of that house. I couldn't breathe."
Hazelle turned her head to the house then back to Peeta," It wouldn't have anything to do with a fiery brunette would it?"
"Yes, Hazelle, you're the source of all my problems."
"I meant the girl."
Peeta turned away answering her gruffly," No."
"Alright, but since we're on the subject, I wanted to clear up the fact of why you were so cold to her before."
Peeta bent down to pick up the axe," What do you mean?"
"It's an improvement. What was that?"
"I was trying to be detached, that's what she needs."
Hazelle uncrossed her arms walking over to him, "No, what she needs is support. She needs for you to be kind to her."
Peeta turned to her sharply, his eyes hard," Believe me that's the last thing she needs from me."
Hazelle watched him for a few seconds before sighing," Alright, I'm going to go start preparing for dinner. You know where to find me when you decide to actually start telling me the truth."
Peeta stood up exhaling a long breath, as he left the axe on the ground. He hated how she could see through him; how she wasn't fooled by the different versions of him he tried to pass as natural.
He could feel the anger rising through him as all the frustrations he felt from not being able to be honest with the people around him, especially the girl with the dark hair and gray eyes, boiled to the surface.
Katniss couldn't help but smile as she reached the door way to the kitchen. Hazelle's lyrical humming was calming and Katniss had begun to feel comfortable in her presence.
She had felt out of place and strange, but the older woman had a way to make her feel at ease. Katniss put her hand to the door frame before pushing herself into the room.
Hazelle turned around, startled when she saw Katniss standing there. Her hand going to her chest," Oh my! Dear you scared the heck out of me!"
"I'm sorry."
Hazelle's normal warm smile was back again," No, it's fine, you're just very quiet."
"Well for a long time it was the only way I could survive."
"I suppose that would be true."
Katniss nodded as she pulled the blue dress down, her fingers fidgeting with the fabric.
Hazelle watched her," Having problems?"
"No, it's just I've never wore dresses before. Well yes, when I was much younger but I don't remember them being so constricting, especially at the chest."
Hazelle laughed," Well be prepared, it will only get worse as we put some weight on you."
Katniss face fell in shock," You mean they get bigger?"
Hazelle burst out in laughter, her hand going to her mouth as she snorted trying to hold in her amusement at noticing how bewildered Katniss seemed.
Katniss pouted as Hazelle rounded the island, grabbing the girl by the wrist.
"It is good to see you washed the woods away because now I can teach you a few things about cooking."
Katniss stopped short causing Hazelle to do so also." I don't know how to cook."
"That's what teaching is about."
Katniss had nodded her head allowing Hazelle to lead her to the counter where a few ingredients were placed.
Katniss had become frustrated when the dough had decided it shouldn't rise. Her annoyance rose to fury when her next seven tries failed also.
She hit the counter in frustration, sending a cloud of flour to rest in her hair.
Hazelle shook her head, a string of laughter escaping her mouth.
Katniss narrowed her eyes," Why do you keep making fun of me? I don't appreciate the way you keep laughing at my expense."
Hazelle nodded, her voice becoming light and gentle," Katniss sometimes when people laugh at the things we do it's not always as an insult."
"Oh. Well alright, I suppose it's ok."
Hazelle walked over to her side to rub a streak of flour from her nose," Ok."
Katniss smiled wide, a small laugh escaping her lips, as Hazelle worked her fingers through the girl's dark hair.
It had taken another hour to prepare dinner before Hazelle had instructed Katniss to be seated at the dining table and await Peeta to join her. Her stomach had dropped realizing she would have to be in a room alone with him once again.
She was gripping the edge of the table when he came into the room, his clothes changed and his hair still damp from where he had bathed.
Katniss watched him closely as he reached the table avoiding eye contact with her. She closed her eyes. He smelled of soap and a musk belonging only to him.
Katniss felt light headed and she wondered if she would pass out by having him so close. The clatter of plates caused her to open her eyes as she was met with intense blue ones.
Peeta was the first one to break away when Hazelle entered the room, carrying the dinner plates. Peeta looked up to her clearing his throat.
"So, anything interesting happen for the later part of the day."
Hazelle nodded," Well, I gave Katniss her first cooking lesson today," Hazelle placed a plate in front of Peeta," but I think we need a bit more time to get the hang of it."
Peeta nodded, trying to focus on anything but the girl directly in front of him," Oh."
Hazelle continued on as she sat the remaining plate in front of Katniss. " Katniss seems to be interested in architecture."
"Really?"
"Oh yes," Hazelle tried to hold back her amusement as Katniss blushed," Walls."
Hazelle turned on her heel to walk back into the kitchen to fetch the rest of the meal.
Peeta reached for his cloth napkin, setting his silver ware to the side," Walls?"
Katniss looked up, her eyes landing on his chest and then flitting up to his eyes," No not really."
The rest of the meal was eaten in a deafening silence as both try to distance themselves from the other. Peeta would occasionally steal a glance her way, her dark hair falling at her chest.
She had changed from before, now wearing a blue summer dress with a dipping cleavage.
He had to swallow hard, as his food threatened to stick in his throat. Peeta decided that they would begin her lessons at once because the sooner she was ready to be introduced to society, the sooner he could find her an adequate suitor and she would be gone.
However, having her so close was destroying his resolve to keep his distance from her, with every passing moment the thoughts of being near her threatened to consume his every being, he wanted to feel her skin, hear her laughter. He just simply wanted to be in her world.
A/N: Thank you again to my awesome Beta cookie-monster-kiki, and thank you to everyone who has already reviewed. But even so, Review, Review!