~ Chapter 8 ~

The next week went by in a numb daze. Loki lost the number of times warriors of Asgard would come to his cell and rape him. It all melted into one single thing in his mind. Among the warriors was the one who had promised to return. He had kept his promise many times, forcing his monstrous flesh inside him.

Between the beatings and the rapes, he didn't have enough time or energy to heal.

Things started to lose color around him. Even the lack of food didn't bother him any more. In the week that had passed he had received food three times. Each time he bore the evidence of his treatment but if the one delivering his food cared or not was another subject.

There was probably not one person in Asgard who worried or cared for him by now. He thought about everything his life had contained and he felt nothing.

He thought about Odin and he felt nothing. He thought about Sif and he felt nothing. He thought about Frigga and he nothing. His teachers were all the same. Asgard in all its glory held no charm to him. Neither did any other realm that he could think about. The universe was so senseless that it turned into a black hole that swallowed him.

But despite his detachment to the world, he didn't think about Thor.

In his mind, his golden brother was shrouded in darkness and shadows.

Above ground Thor was standing on the terrace connected to his room. Over looking Asgard. The golden thunder God felt sick to his stomach. His mother had locked herself away in her personal chamber, refusing to see anyone. All because of him.

Every minute of every day, he was plagued by guilt for what had happened to Loki. He couldn't eat. He couldn't sleep without the image of Loki on the floor before Odin haunted his mind. Loki's tears as he lay pinned to the bed.

However, the strongest emotion in him was the one that fueled his guilt the most. He still longed for Loki. Not only did he miss his younger brother and still desired him just as strongly as the day everything went wrong, but his personal feelings were slowly growing as his mind was filled with old memories of Loki.

It was distasteful. It was wrong, and still Thor couldn't help the growing longing inside of him.

The lust he had felt for so long was slowly turning into endearment and...love.

Thor shook his head as he walked away from the view of Asgard.

How can I possibly love after what I've done?

"Are you still stuck in what happened?"

Thor spun around and saw Sif standing inside his private chambers. His temper threatened to blow for the indiscretion but Sif gave him no time to do it.

"You have to let the past go." she walked up to him and put her hand on his strong arm. "You can't let Loki haunt you for the rest of your life."

Loki.

"It's not that easy. Some things can not be forgiven."

"I know, Thor, but you can't let the Loki fester inside of you anymore. It will only ruin you and lead you away of becoming the King you are capable of." She tried to get his attention by looking into his eyes, but he wouldn't met her. "Loki can no longer hurt you. He can no longer hurt you, or Asgard any more. He was never meant to be part of your family. Forget about him."

Sif waited patiently for her wise words to melt into Thor, but when he finally looked into her eyes the blue orbs were cold and hard.

"You do not have the right to speak his name." Thor growled at Sif, "Leave."

"But Thor-" she started to protest when her jaw was caught in a bruising grip.

"You have no knowledge of what I'm capable of. Leave."

Actually scared of Thor's tone of voice, Sif removed her hand from his body and quickly left, feeling shocked.

Left alone, Sif's words echoed in his ears. He had allowed this to happen. He had allowed the slander against Loki. He had heard what was said behind his back. It was entirely his fault, and now others thought they could get away with saying anything because Loki had taken the blame that was rightfully his.

As if feeling eyes on his back Tho turned around and caught sight of the Bifrost.

He knew he had to speak with someone about what happened. Even a small confession would be better than nothing, it might even give him courage to confess to his father about the truth.

In the shadows of the dungeon, Loki sat in the corner. Mindlessly watching the rat search his cell for anything edible. His clothes in rags from all the rough handling he had been through.

I shouldn't be here. This is all a nightmare, I'm actually dreaming. I'm on my way to the elves realm where I will soon meet their head magician and he will teach me all he knows about the art of magic. Then, after a few years I will go back to Asgard and Thor will have gotten his crush under control. We will laugh and share mead like the old times.

Loki closed his eyes and let himself sink his mind. He was sinking into water of endless depths, engulfing him and shielding him from the world. He felt safe for the first time in weeks.

No warriors to worry about. No spiteful Sif. No father who turned his back on him. No Thor.

Nothing could disturb him here. It was as if the whole sea were cradling him.

Bubbles rose from the dark bottomless sea. There was no need to breath or struggle. Nothing could harm him here.

Around him, from the dark bottom of the ocean rose Jormungandr. It's eyes stared at the lonely figure before circling around Loki in an endless spiral, protecting and comforting the man.

TBC