Bella's POV
"Come on Amelia, we have to be there in 5 minutes!" I yell at her while trying to find my shoes, and purse and keys.
"Bella calm down, the wedding won't start without the bride." Jake tries but I glare at him and tell him he better have her in the car in 3 minutes or I'm leaving them both.
He just laughs and goes to gets her. Nothing is ever easy with that child.
She's 7 years old and she drives me nuts on a daily basis but I love her so much and I try to remember how close we were to losing her when she was sick.
"I'm ready Mommy!" she says and comes running down the stairs in her dress.
"You look beautiful Amelia." I tell her. "Now get in the car!"
Once she gets in Jake stops me before I can get in.
"You're sure about this Bella? I know you've been with him for two years but I also know that you still love Paul. He knows it too Bella. We both know that if Paul came back you'd run to him without a second thought and right now that's almost OK but once you marry him it'll be harder." He's made a huge effort to stay out of my business but I know he thinks I'm making a huge mistake.
"I love Sam. You know I do. And he loves me and Amelia and he's a good man. Better than Paul ever was and you know that too. I'm getting married in 45 minutes Jake and I need you to support me."
"I know you love him Bella but you still don't look at him like you looked at Paul. But I support you. Let's go." And he holds his hand out for me and helps me get in the car.
I waited for Paul to come back for a year and none of us heard anything from him. I even tried filing a missing persons report but since he told us he was leaving they weren't concerned. I know he's out there somewhere and sometimes I miss him so much but I had to move on.
After Paul left I spent a lot of time with Sam hanging out at his house after work, then we started doing stuff with Amelia on the weekends and he's the one that went to all the supervised visits Mike had with Amelia before I decided he could be trusted to take her alone. Jake wanted to go with me but I knew he would just end up starting crap with Mike. Sam never liked Mike but he always controlled it. We were just really good friends but slowly it was more. I started spending the nights with him when Amelia was with Mike and we would stay up late and watch movies then one night he kissed me and one thing lead to another and we dated for two years before he asked me to marry him.
And maybe I don't love him like I loved Paul but I do love him and he'll be a good step father to Amelia.
We get to the church and Jake helps me get out while Amelia takes off like a freaking storm.
"She's going to ruin this Jake, I don't know how but she's going to too somehow. Please don't let her out of your sight." I warn him.
"Stop worrying Bella. She'll be fine, even if she ruins the wedding who cares?" He laughs and I smack him.
We are walking up the stairs when I hear him.
"Bella, wait." Paul calls from behind me and I try to keep walking but I know I will regret it and even more Jake knows I will regret it so he stops me. I turn around and I go off on him.
"Are you freaking kidding me Paul? You up and disappear with nothing but a text message and then show up on my freaking wedding day? 4 years! It's been 4 years! Nothing you can say can make me forgive you." I'm so mad but I'm crying too.
"Can I have 5 minutes with her Jake, please; I just want to talk to her." Jake looks at me and I tell him its fine, just please keep an eye on Amelia.
"How is Amelia?" He asks.
"You have no right to ask about her, you left her just like you left me." I snap.
"Bella, you deserved better than me and I knew it. The night you went to Sam's I saw how protective he was of you and I knew that he was right in protecting you from me and I knew that he would always protect and take care of you. I didn't expect this though." He says bitterly. "I still love you." He adds softer, not so bitter.
"What did you expect? For me to never move on? I didn't plan for this to happen! Sam and I were friends until one day we realized we wanted more. But why today? What kind of a jerk comes back to the girl he left on her wedding day?" I'm yelling at him.
"I'm sorry Bella! But it just seemed like this was my last chance to get you back!" He's yelling back.
And I'm standing there trying to figure out what the hell to do now. I've come along way but I'm still really bad at making decisions. All of them, from the little ones like what to wear or what to make for dinner to the bigger things like this.
Sam's good like that, he usually tells me what to do because somehow he knows what I really want before I do. Hmm. What would Sam tell me to do now? I laugh to myself or I thought to myself but Paul asks what's funny.
"Nothing about this is funny Paul." I whisper.
"Bella," Sam comes out of the church probably because Jake told him what was going on.
I turn to look at him and I see the man that always there for me, never tried to control me and has never broke my heart. The man that told Paul exactly what to bring me to the hospital that first day, the man who was there for me when I hated Jake and Paul, the man who hung out with me and my daughter and stayed up watching movies with me and never expected anything from me. The man my daughter calls daddy and runs to when she's scared or happy or just being Amelia.
"I'm sorry Paul; I'm late for my wedding." I whisper to him and the look in his eyes nearly breaks my heart but I turn towards Sam who is standing there with his hand out to me.
"You're sure about this Bella? I'll understand if you want to call this off and be with him." Sam tells me and in that moment I have never been surer of anything.
"I love you Sam. I choose you." I look into his eyes and hope more than anything he trusts me. "Please believe me Sam, I want you." I'm crying and I'm so scared that he's going to do what Jake and Paul always did and choose for me.
"Do you still love him Bella?" He asks and I think about it for a minute.
"No, I thought I did until I saw you standing there and all that mattered was you. I promise you you're all I want. I love you and only you. Please marry me Sam."
"Oh Bella I would have married you even if you still loved him. I just wanted to make sure you were making the right decision for you. I love you so much and all I've ever wanted was for you to be happy." He kisses me and we start to walk in together but he stops and turns to Paul and asks if he wants to come in.
"Thanks but no I think that would be really weird so I'm just going to go." He says sadly and I feel so awful for him.
The wedding is beautiful and Jake manages to control Amelia until the reception where she eats half the cake when no one is looking but no one really cares.
"Wouldn't it have been easier if you had just listened to me about Sam being good for you all those years ago?" Jake jokes and I think about it.
"No, because the reason I love Sam so much is because he let me take the time to love him. If I had listened to you I would have felt like I was with him because you said so. And this was never about you."
Sam comes up to us and wraps his arms around me and whispers he loves me in my ear. And I know how lucky I am.
The reason I don't look at Sam like I used to look at Paul is because with Paul everything about him was new and exciting but Sam was one of my best friends and so by the time I loved him I knew him like I knew myself.
"Dance with me Daddy!" Amelia comes and pulls him away from me and I laugh as I watch them go.
Being a grown up is hard, every choice has consequences and it's so easy to spend your life thinking what if but in this moment I have no regrets.