Ok, so the description of the batcave is completely from my head. I referenced nothing, so don't take my word on anything.
Enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing.
The team stared, wide-eyed. "Wow." Megan whispered. Artemis, Conner, and Kaldur were speechless.
Wally and Dick took one look at their teammates faces and burst out laughing.
"Your… your faces…." Wally wheezed. "Priceless" Dick agreed. "Want me to send you the footage?" "Please." Wally chocked out, and both boys collapsed again, laughing.
They were standing in a huge cave (dur). A gigantic computer system filled one wall, complete with several keyboards and a ginormous monitor. Shelves full of equipment dotted other walls, and there were several hallways branching out from the main room. Bats- actual bats- flew high above them, chattering and swooping around.
It was awesome.
Dick and Wally finally managed to stop laughing. "So," Dick started casually, "like I said, this is the Batcave. Neat huh? Touch anything and I can't guarantee that you'll leave with all your limbs intact. So don't touch."
Wally had apparently already decided to disobey him and had zoomed over to a cabinet and removed a granola bar from it, which was gone in about 5 seconds. Artemis raised an eyebrow at him. "Looks like Kid Idiot already decided not to listen."
Dick shook his head. "We gave up on Wally ages ago. That's actually his snack cabinet down here, for when Alfie isn't down here to feed him."
"Alfie?"
"Don't actually call him that. His name's really Alfred, or on bat business Agent A or just A-" "Or Batbutler!" "-Wally, he's told you not to all him that. Anyway, he's awesome and makes killer chocolate chip cookies. Even Batman eats them."
Everyone- other than Wally of course, who had been witness to this- blinked at the image of the big bad bat snacking on cookies and drinking milk.
"Seriously?" Artemis asked, sounding slightly skeptical.
"Yup." Dick said cheerfully. "It's sort of a tradition. We've been eating them since I came to live with him."
Everyone added a hyperactive 9 year old to their mental image of Batman eating cookies. It was strangely terrifying.
"Do… do you think he could teach me to make good cookies?" Megan asked tentatively. "I always burn them."
"I would be honored, Miss Megan." They turned around to find an elderly man dressed in a suit standing at the mouth of a staircase and holding a tray of cookies.
"Batbutler!" "Alfie!"
Dick and Wally ran over to give him a hug and steal a cookie or two. Or five.
Once the two boys had let go of him, the man straightened out his suit and smSo failed at the team. "My name is Alfred. I am the butler here. Would you like a cookie, before Masters Richard and Wallace eat them all?" The two boys grinned. They knew they would eat them all if they could, so they didn't mind getting called out on it. The team exchanged yet another look before they moved to take.
As they did, Dick told them, "Don't listen to Alfie. He's way more than a butler. He's like my grandfather, and this whole place would collapse on itself if he wasn't here. He's also saved Batman's and my lives more times than we can count. There wouldn't be a Batman without him. And he is the highest authority in the house, not Bruce, no matter what he says."
The team blinked. This was who bossed around the Batman?
So far, this tour was nothing like they expected.