What's Done In The Dark: The King's Concubine
Dear Diary 23
Fallen into the darkness of emptiness, Serena floated in a void of blackness. It had been two days since she was discovered in the pool of her own blood in the art studio bathroom. Pale, cold and unmoving, she had somehow managed to stay alive if only by a thread of breath. She was unaware of anything around her, unaware of the man who hadn't left her bedside since, unaware of the many tears he had cried. Disheveled, wane and weary, Darien watched the silent woman that was the love of his life. Though her breasts did not rise and fall to indicate she still lived, the machines hooked on her showed life, faintly.
Sitting at the foot of the bed fast asleep was a tired looking Lita who, like Darien, hadn't left Serena's side since her discovery. The king and servant girl both remained with the girl most important to them and to see them, you would never guess that one was royalty and one was commoner. It went a long way in enforcing that despite class and status, when it came to love, all were equal.
Tired of sitting and watching her, Darien pushed his chair backwards and knelt by the bed. He stared at her ashen face, devoid of life, devoid of laughter and devoid of love. He missed her lively face, her pure crystalline blue eyes that always reflected all her emotions, especially her strongest emotion, love, for him. He missed her joyful laugh, her sweet and tender voice, her gentle touches and her pink cheeks when he made her blush. He missed all the things about her that made her alive. He had been so lonely in the past two days she had been sleeping.
"Oh my love, I am so sorry." He murmured, tears shimmering in his eyes. It seemed that no matter how much tears he shed, there was still more left.
"I should have seen your pain. I should have noticed your fears! I should have been there…I should have…." He whispered, the tears now freely falling. He softly held the sides of her face, leaned forward and softly touched his lips to her cold ones. He pulled away, looked at the unmoving girl and kissed her again, this time with a little more force. Again and again and again as if true loves kiss was all he needed to break her spell but this was no fairytale and her illness was not that of magic. She was in real danger of dying and not even a fairy godmother could save her if even one could be found.
"Oh Serena I am so sorry. I failed you again. Always I am useless when you need me most." He said as he laid his head gently on her breasts, listening for the sound of her heart beat which faintly beat.
"Please wake up." He begged miserably, his shoulders shaking with grief and sorrow.
"I don't care about the baby so please, please come back to me. Please! I need you!" he crumbled to the floor as memories assaulted him.
Flashback
He had been frantically moving from one bathroom to the next when Lita's loud scream reached his ears. Stretching his legs to its fullest, he sprinted up flights of stairs and arrived at Lita's side in less than a minute. Lita's legs gave out under her as her large eyes perceived the scene before her. Darien's own shock and fear lasted but a minute and he dashed to Serena's side, feeling her chest and hand for pulse. He lifted her into his arms, trying not to wretch at seeing Serena looking so dead.
"Call the damn doctor!" Darien screamed, his calm demeanor losing ground fast. Rei, who had also heard Lita's scream, came upon the scene and immediately rushed to get a doctor. Taking no notice of Lita, Darien ran out the bathroom, down the stairs, out the studio and to the palace clinic where he expected the doctor to be. Moments later, Lita picked herself up and frantically followed after them.
Darien laid Serena on the clinic bed, wiping her with whatever cloth he could feel. Seconds later the doctor entered the room and forcefully, with Rei's help, shooed the distraught Darien out of the room. Darien paced and paced for the hour it took the doctor to clean Serena up.
"What's taking so damn long!" he shrieked.
"Complications." The doctor answered from behind him. Darien wheeled around and rounded on the doctor.
"How is she? Is she well? Is she ok? Will she make it? What happened? What's wrong with her? May I go in there to see her? The blood…so much…"
"Shhhhh, I can't answer all that if you don't pause." The doctor said, sighing. For the first time Darien noticed how uncomfortable and grim faced the doctor looked.
"Please please tell me she is ok." Darien begged, his eyes shimmering with tears.
"I hontesly don't know Your Majesty. For her well being right now is a matter of opinion." He answered. Disturbed, Darien shoved the doctor to the side and rushed into the room to find Serena sleeping so soundly on the bed. Darien himself paled at Serena's white skin. He swallowed and the tears overflowed. Quickly he rushed to her side and took her hand in his.
"Wake up I say! Wake up! You can't leave me! Not now! Not ever!" he cried miserably as he cried on her. From behind, the two girls and doctor stood silently as they watched their king grieve.
"She is not dead." The doctor said, his words barely registering in Darien's ears. He turned his eyes ever so slowly to the doctor, his eyes begging for hope.
"She is just slipping in and out of consciousness." Lita who had gone to the other side of the bed and taken Serena's order hand breathed a sigh of relief but still her worried expression remained.
Before the Doctor could speak of Serena's condition, Rei, Amy, Rita, Andrew, Prime, Nephrite, Zoisite and Lord Ephraim hurriedly entered the room and all rushed to stand around Serena's bedside. Prime took his place besides Darien and Lord Ephraim went to stand beside Lita. Everyone went on their knees, staring worriedly at the girl who in such a short time had become so important to all of them. Surprising of all was the tall woman who had followed in after Lord Ephraim but remained by the door way. Lady Trista Elion, cousin to the throne and Hotaru's personal governess and advisor.
What is she doing here? Darien wondered briefly but quickly forgot about her as he turned his attention back to his lover.
Standing there, Trista was genuinely touched by the look of unhidden concern and fear these people had for this woman who wanted to dethrone their queen.
It's amazing what this little girl has done. She thought to herself. In her short while in the capital, not only had she arranged what they had heard to be an epic gathering but dare introduce such new and forbidden ideas to the ladies of the court. Ideas of dreams and being able to shape their own life. Though many of the ladies scoffed at the ideas from their return of the party, Trista saw in many of their mannerism an undisguised hope to believe in all that Serena had introduced them to. Despite their stubbornness, they could not shut up about the party they had labeled "a disaster." If it was such a disaster, why did they sigh wistfully, why did they look sad after they've scoffed it? Why did they look like they've lost something or realized they never had anything to begin with? Trista was very irritated that she hadn't attended the affair but as Hotaru's personal friend and governess, what Hotaru says goes and she had forbidden any of them from attending the gathering though Trista was much aware that some of the ladies purpose of going was to either destroy the event or spy on everything and report back to Hotaru.
The first time she had met Serena in the mansion in the forest, she had immediately thought of a frail and broken glass doll which is exactly what she looked now on the bed but could such a frail person do what she had done? Would such a weak person dare go up against their ruthless queen? Trista shook her head. Now adays she was starting to realize that nothing was ever as it seemed. Earnestly and honestly, she hoped and said a silent prayer for Serena to be ok.
"What is her condition doctor?" Lord Ephraim finally asked after feeling Serena's forehead and finally sitting by her side, taking the hand that had been in Lita's hands.
"I cannot disclose her condition to just any…"
"Speak!" A direct command given by the king could not be argued and so with a sigh, the doctor looked through his file and spoke.
"She has just lost a baby."
The silence after his sentence was golden. The silence not only seemed to be in the room but everywhere in the world. No cemetery could get any quieter than that. Absolute shock rip through all of them, deafening their senses and making them mute a whole minute before they all broke into an array of voices asking questions. Lita who had known of Serena's pregnancy laid her head down on the bed post and cried knowing how hurt Serena would be when she woke up.
However it was obvious that no one else in the room had even ever suspected their little tiny soon to be queen had been pregnant.
"Pregnant? When? For how long?" Darien demanded of the Doctor and flashed his eyes over to Lita who avoided his gaze. A lump of hurt and pain rouse to his throat as he tried to digest the news. His true love had been pregnant and had kept it a secret from him. And now the baby was dead and she was close to dying too….what?
"I noticed her pregnancy during my observation on her the night she fainted in the old castle and she's been coming to me for regular checkups. She swore me to silence because she said she wanted to be the one to deliver the news to you all but she would do so when her condition was better." The doctor explained, silence once again following his statement as they all tried to absorb his words.
"How long?" Ephraim asked.
"A month and a half at the most."
"So close." Ephraim mattered. No one save Prime heard him and he couldn't help but to agree. If the baby had survived, Serena's chances on the throne would have doubled. She was birthing their king's baby. She could legally become his wife even if she carried the title "second wife." But without the pregnancy to anchor her to Darien, she could only become his mistress and even if she gets pregnant after she had been sanctified as his mistress, she would hold no grounds to the throne.
So close.
"But that is not the worst news." The doctor once again interrupted their reverie.
"What do you mean?" Rei asked, her stomach churning. What could possibly be worse than Serena losing a baby except if Serena is dying herself.
"The baby's death was no accident." Everyone paid attention.
"My Lady's deteriorating condition was not accidental either." Lita blinked, fear clutching at her. She had suspected but had not been sure…
"Speak plainly doctor; I have no patience for word play." Darien said curtly.
"There was a concentrated mass of poison in her system."
Gasps of shock and horror disturbed the room and its inhabitants.
"How?" Darien demanded; his eyes large with shock.
"I do not know. Nor have I yet to determine what kind of poison it is. Give me some days to work on it and to work on an antidote. My guess is that the poison must have been a slow acting agent but a powerful one at that. Her insides are torn. Honestly at the look of things, it would be a miracle if she manages to live pass a month. But even if she survive this, her chances of giving birth again is zero. The poison ate away too much of her inner organs to the point where she cannot support a baby."
Awakening from his flashback, Darien squeezed Serena's hand gently. He would never have a little one to call his own. Their love would never bear fruit. Their battle for the throne just got that much harder for what kingdom will choose a barren queen?
During his flashback, Lita rouse from her sleep and organized the covers around Serena properly. Lita felt most responsible for everything. She was in charge of foods eaten by Serena so it was no surprise that everyone looked at her at the mention of the poison but it hurt that Darien would still doubt her loyal to Serena even now but she supposed she deserved it. She had not poisoned Serena and everyone knew that but unless Serena took the poison herself, there was no way anyone would have had the chance to poison her.
So how had it been done?
A knock came at the door and Darien and Lita both turned to it.
"Come in." Darien answered tiredly. The door slide open and in came Trista. Both conscious occupants of the room straightened up as the older lady approached them.
"Good evening Your Majesty." She greeted, paying no mind to Lita. Darien nodded.
"What brings you here Milady?" Darien asked, fighting to remain civil though all she wanted was to tell her to be gone. He did not want any of Hotaru's henchman around Serena at this time of trouble.
"I came to offer my condolences on the loss of your child and on Lady Serena's ill condition. I am most sorry for your loss." She said honestly, Curtsying to show her respect. So fresh was the loss that Darien could do naught but nod.
Right then the doctor walked into the room and checked on Serena's medications and life support materials. Her oxygen and blood bags and the equipment monitoring the beat of her heart.
After which he turned to Darien.
"I cannot identify the poison use but I know it is a herbal poison, the kind that might grow on a mountainous region." He said.
"A herb poison?" Darien asked.
"Yes My Lord."
"If that is the case then the only way it could have entered her system is through her mouth which means it was administered to her through food." Lita said.
"But you're the only one who feeds her." Darien said, trying to refrain from out rightly accusing Lita of sabotaging Serena again.
"Yes…." Lita said softly, recalling every meal she has ever served Serena except that time….
"No wait…there've been three occasions where I did not feed her. During her stay at Hotaru's house."
"I don't think any of them will poison her." Darien said wearily, the idea not totally counted out.
"Neither do I. And when she stayed at the commoners' community."
"I definitely don't think they are capable of this." Darien replied.
"Which leaves only one time left, the night of Hotaru's ball. The night when Serena ran off to Hotaru's family house."
"Do you know what you are suggesting Lita?" Darien asked, seeing exactly what she wanted to say.
"Doctor, can you please describe as best you can the form of the herb could be in before it is fermented." Trista asked. They had all forgotten her presence in the room.
"A piece of the herb was found inside her during the operation. Let me retrieve it." When the Doctor left, they stayed silent and paused. Then back in the doctor returned. He showed the leaf piece to Trista, Lita and Darien hurried over to look. As soon as Trista saw the leaf she gasped and exclaimed, "Brizon ilaer!"
"What?" Darien asked in confusion.
"Brizon ilaer. It's the name of this poison. It is very lethal and dangerous!"
All three in the room looked at the suddenly distressed woman.
"Trista, I need you to tell us all you know about this herb." Darien said seriously. Inside him his heart skipped a beat; there might be hope for Serena after all. Quickly recovering from her outburst, Trista looked away.
"I don't know anything." All their jaws dropped in astonishment. This woman who had just blurted out the name of this unknown herb and seemed distress about it dare to say she knew nothing? How do you react so emotionally to something you know nothing about?
"Lady Trista, the woman who I love is on her death bird and you are the only person with information that might help us save her and you dare to lie before me that you know nothing? I can have you beheaded for your lies!" Darien almost yelled. Sudden frustration rouse in him and the need to kick or hurt someone was raging in him.
Trista remained silent for a long while. The night of Hotaru's spontaneous ball, she had not been present because she had left to the residence of her family. Upon her return was when she learned of the disappearance of the King's new interest. Back then, she remembered saying that she had taken care of the pest eternally. Choosing not to touch on that topic, Trista tried to think of a way to give the information without mentioning Hotaru's name. It wasn't that she was afraid of Hotaru, the simple truth was regardless of Hotaru's cruelty over the years, they were still friends. She was not about to betray her friend, not even if it means her death.
"These leafs grow in rather remote corners of our kingdom. It is often harvested for medicine. If properly fermented, the poison can easily be taken it and it makes a very miraculous medicine for a good number of illnesses. So far I only by name know one place that these herbs grow, the Harthorne Mountains of Lilaien." She finished speaking.
To Lita and the doctor, her words meant little to them but as soon as she mentioned Harthorne, Darien's eyes shadowed with confirmed suspicion. When he had first heard of the poison, something in his mind had gone off and the only person he could think of that could harm Serena was of course Hotaru. This suspicion grew expanditory when Lita explained that it had to be sometime during the night of the ball when Serena disappeared. If that is not enough confirmation, these herbs grew on the mountains right behind Hotaru's family house, the huge mountains that separated them from most of the town of Lilaien. He knew now without a shadow of a doubt that the one responsible for Serena's condition was Hotaru and she was going to pay for it but for the mean time, they had the answers that could save her. Punishment would come afterwards.
Darien immediately left the room and swiftly made his way to his office where Ephraim, Andrew and Prime sat doing paper work. Upon his entrance, they stood up but sat back down when he flopped himself onto his chair a huge sigh. He quickly sat up and explained the situation to them with the thought of going off to Hotary's family house to learn all that he could and to bring back an antidote if there was one.
"No Your Majesty! You cannot leave the palace, especially not now!" Prime said.
"What do you expect me to do!" Darien exploded his eyes viciously crazy.
"Send someone else Your Majesty." Andrew said calmly, hoping to plicate the raging king.
"This is too important for that!" Darien said, running his fingers through his unkempt hair and pacing back and forth vigorously.
"I will go." They all turned to look at Prime who had spoken.
"What?" Darien asked.
"It is best for you to be here in case she wakes up. I'm sure she will want to see you the moment she wakes up and if you're not here I think that might bother her quite a bit. I will go and bring back an antidote or someone capable of making an antidote and I will return swiftly." No one said anything for a moment and Darien thought about his words. Although he wanted to go off to find a cure, the fact is the thought bothered him. What if….what if he doesn't get back in time? What if Serena woke up and he wasn't here? What if….what if she was gone by the time he gets back? Gone and buried? He would not have had the chance to have held her one last time….the what ifs were starting to make him afraid.
"Fine, but you have only three days."
"It shall be done Your Majesty."
Right then Lita burst into the room with a wild grin.
"She's trying to wake up!" she announced and bounded off again. All four men in the room quickly followed her to the clinic and into the room that housed their beloved woman. Trista had already left the room. Darien immediately resumed his seat by her and took her hand. She was trying, her lips were trying to open and her eyes shook with effort to open.
"Come on love, you can do it. You can do it." Darien said, gripping her hand and watching her anxiously. Everyone in the room held their breath. For a minute Serena paused and Darien was afraid she was not going to try anymore but she slowly moved one finger in his hands that were folded over one of hers.
"Yes, that's it. I'm right here. Come back my love, please. Come back to me." he said soothingly and continued to say sweet nothings. After about 5 minutes of tense anticipation, her hand drop. A dramatic moment that made them all thought she was gone. Seconds later her eyes, shadowed by sleep and pain opened. No one spoke or breathed. They just watched her like a hawk, waiting to see what she would do next. She closed her eyes back up again and opened them. The room was dimly lit to avoid blinding her when she opened her eyes. Painfully slowly, she turned her head to look at Darien. For the first 30 seconds her eyes registered no recognition. She blinked slowly, her eyes opening one more time and she made an effort to smile when Darien registered in her mind. Filled to the brim with emotions, happy tears dropped down Darien's cheeks. He sat up by her side, leaned down and embraced her as gently her could.
"Serena serena serna. " He whispered over and over. Everyone else breathed a sigh of relief, their tense expression replaced with something akin to anxiety and happiness. They moved a step closer as if drawn by a pool, each waiting to have their turn by Serena's side. Finally Darien leaned back up and Lita who didn't want to give Serena any hard work came across from the other side so Serena wouldn't have to turn her head.
Looking up from Darien's eyes, she saw Lita and smiled a little more and everyone else moved a little closer, wanting to be noticed. Her eyes brightened a shade as she took them all in.
"Hi." She mouthed soundlessly. Darien continued to run his fingers up and down her cheeks, eyes glued on her.
"Hi yourself." Andrew answered softly as he went on one knew to be a little more eye contact with her. Suddenly there was this awkwardness that could not be described in words. How does one carry on a conversation with someone who had just woken from two days of sleeping lacked sound to communicate?
Serena tried to turn her head to the other side but realizing the purpose of the gesture, Darien stopped the turning of her head. Questioningly, her eyes conveyed her confusion.
"It's just us here right now. No one on the other side." He said and she tried to nod.
"Amy will be here shortly." Ephraim finally spoke. They all looked at him but only briefly for Darien who quickly returned his attention back on his beloved woman.
"She has been very distraught since you took ill and has not been much of herself to the point she skipped meals and showers so I have her grounded in the house till she can master the effort to make herself presentable. It won't be too long before she gets here." He explained.
Serena nodded in understanding.
"So what's going on?" there was sound this time but only on the "what" and "on" but they figured out what she was trying to say.
"Nothing, just waiting for you to wake up since you have been sleeping for the past two days."
"Oh." Soundless her lips made the shape.
Almost unconsciously, Serena moved her hand down onto her stomach, sighing seconds later. Her eyes teared up, the knowledge that she had lost her first born came to the surface of her mind and she closed her eyes, hoping to hide the tears but they all knew and they all hurt with her. Darien rubbed her shoulders soothingly and she opened her eyes, eyes that were filled with pain and regrets and it hurt Darien and everyone else so much to see her in so much pain.
"I'm sorry." She whispered, a tear escaping her eyes and sliding down her cheeks.
Darien shook his head. "No. Don't be sorry my dear. You have done nothing wrong. You have done nothing wrong." He answered, laying his head gently her head. Deciding they needed some privacy, everyone left the room.
"I didn't mean to keep it a secret." She murmured, no longer soundless though here words came out as a whisper.
"I know."
"And now look at what has happened." She said, tears cascading down her cheeks. Darien kissed her cheeks, trailing up the pathway of the tears and erasing them with his lips.
"Never forget that a child is a gift of God. God knows you will make a wonderful mother so don't fear. He will give us another." He said warmly as he laid his head lightly on her chest and they stayed this way for a while.
"Darien?"
"MMM…" he lifted his head to look into her eyes.
"Do me a favor."
"Anything."
"You know the paintings I was working on? They should be dry by now. Please deliver each portrait to whom it is of with a little card saying simply 'I'm sorry'." She said. He said nothing for a minute, then laid his head on her chest again.
"Sure."
Fifteen minutes later, Darien looked up and saw that Serena was sleeping. Her breathing was shallow which it would be until she was cured so he wasn't alarmed. Pulling the covers, kissing her lips gently, her stood up.
"I love you beyond life itself. I can live without a baby but I can't live without you. It's alright my love, God will give us another." He whispered, kissed her check one last time and left the room.
Outside anxious faces awaited him.
"She is asleep again." She said and they nodded but the anxiety still remained.
"Your Majesty?" Prime said.
"You may go Prime. Please ride swiftly back."
"Yes Your Majesty."
"God speed my friend."
"Be safe." Andrew added. Bowing, Prime turned and swiftly took leave of them.
"Lita."
"Yes My Lord?"
"Before you can sit next to Serena again you must go make yourself presentable and also eat something. I will do the same." Darien said.
"But..."
"No buts! Now go." A little miffed at the gentle command, Lita curtsied and left to do as she's been commanded. Turning in unison, the remaining three men exited the clinic, Darien to his room for a touch up and the two men back to their work in Darien's office.
Trista, haven left Serena's bedside, quickly made her way to Hotaru's quarters where she sat with the other two people that were closets to her.
"Ah Trista, I was wondering where you were." She said with a smile, patting the spot next to her. Trista took the invite and sat down with a sigh.
"You sound rather tired my dear, what's the matter?" the lady called Michelle with strange aqua hair asked as she went about making tea for Trista.
"I need to ask you something sweet pea." Trista said, turning to Hotaru. The queen blinked and smiled gently at the fond childish nickname the three has been calling her since she was born.
"Go ahead."
"Did you by any chance poison Serena?" they all paused, letting what Trista said sink in.
"No." Hotaru said.
"Brizon Ilaer was found in her blood and you know the only place that poisonous herbs grow is by your family house." Trista said.
"And that automatically makes me the culprit?" Hotaru said, rising to her feet.
"No. But the king suspects it is you."
"And how would he even know where the plant grows eh?" Hotaru asked, turning to walk away.
"I told him." Hotaru stopped walking.
"You did what?"
"I told him where I thought they grew and I presume he is making arrangements for someone to go seek an antidote from your fami…" Before Trista could finish, Hotaru grabbed the flowers that sat in a water vas on the tea table and smite Trista with it. All actions in the room seized.
"You foolish traitor! Go to your room! I'll deal with you later." Hotaru said menacingly. Without a word, Trista rouse and left Hotaru's living room.
"Your Majesty….." the blond of the group began but was cut off by Hotaru.
"Quick, find out who is heading towards Liliaien and stopped them from getting there or getting back!" Hotaru ordered. Both people in the room seemed uncomfortable with the idea.
"What the hell are you doing! Move it!" she screamed.
"Sweet pea please, think about what you are doing." The aqua heard woman said.
"I know what the hell I'm doing! Just do as you are told!" Sighing, both women rouse to their feet and silently left the room. Hotaru dropped back on the bed.
"This can't be happening."
In her clinic room, Serena cried. She had pretended to sleep so Darien would leave her alone to her pain. She didn't want Darien to see the layers of hurt the loss of the baby had created in her. Turning to face the window that was covered by curtains, she cried out her anguish, her voice unable to stay silent. With each tear drop the volume of her sobs increased, her face contorted into a masks of heartbreaking misery.
Fear, disappointment, loneliness, emptiness…these feelings vengefully assaulted her heart, tearing at her peace of mind.
Why her? After all she had gone through; after all she had given of herself, why was she denied the one thing she craved the most? Yet above all the crippling powers of misery was the feeling of guilt. Guilt that she had not known she was pregnant, guilt that she had not taken better care of herself, guilt that by her decision to be with a man already someone else's had caused an innocent soul the chance to live.
Please forgive the late delivery and please understand that I'm trying. school keeps me very busy. but yea^^
A big thank you to all of those who commented on the previous chapter!