Thanks to els, i. have. lost. myself. again, fookyeahskins, DNNHK, Alice Boricua, Beck89, Ujin, sexpistols07, spikie142003, fakevegan, dourememberthat, sookieheartsbill, EmZ2009, M, skinsfan15 and mUfF MuNcHeR for leaving one.
Especially to els and skinsfan15 for really liking certain paragraphs I wrote. Such inspiration would never exist without the beautiful poem. But thank you for noticing the effort I put into the sentences. :) I really liked writing that chapter.
It's been a really long time since I wrote something. Conversation isn't my strongest as you might notice in this chapter. I hope the quality's still there. Y'all might need to go back and read a couple of chapters, if anyone's still interested in this. Let me know what you like, what you don't like and what I can improve on yeah? Cheers.
Chapter Fourteen – The Kiss
Emily
Wobbly knees. Heartbeats in a staccato symphony. Heavy gulps of air.
If two weeks ago, someone told me my chances of ever kissing Naomi again was zero, I'd believe them in a heartbeat.
Now, I'm faced with the prospect of possibly kissing Naomi again. And again.
My brain had gone into a comatose state of shock, unbelief and careful delight. I kissed Naomi. Correction. Naomi kissed me. Three times. And didn't run. That was a start.
Oh her kisses were – surreal. I can still feel the taste of her tongue in my mouth, which she had plunged in and consumed the whole of me, making my mind swirl, fingers clench and forget this was happening and the world around me still existed. The sensation of her kisses fell straight into the pit of my stomach and settled low and warm, causing an unexpected reaction.
I hadn't had much time to think as I was already following Naomi up the stairs to her bedroom. Her bedroom. The most intimate space to her or anyone. I reckon.
We were going to study, or actually have a proper chat on what had actually happened. My mind honestly cannot function well enough to handle the simplest math problem. It kept backtracking and rewinding itself to the way Naomi was kissing me. It was only capable of thinking about that. No, well, about what she said too, about her kissing me in class and actually meaning it, that it meant something to her.
I should be ecstatic, delirious with joy, but I kept a lid on it because this didn't mean anything. Her kisses didn't say anything, they weren't contracts, there were so much left unsaid, so much can be changed.
We made it up to the landing on the second floor and I followed her to her room, which was situated at the corner. Opening the door, she hobbled in. I stepped in after her, expectantly. I was excited to see her room; you get to know someone in an intimate way once you've seen their room. There are so many things you can find out about them from what they have in them.
The first thing I noticed was a queen size bed right in the middle with its dark blue bed sheets and double pillows. To it's left was a small cluttered desk with all sorts of papers, books and little items strewn across it. On right side of the table was a very full open bookcase, bursting with books, stacked vertically and horizontally over, in front and on top of each other, and a tiny personal toilet. Her trophies and medals were placed neatly on a small table at the other side of the room. There were only four of them in total. One trophy and three medals. The trophy was the one she had won for last year's finals. It was gold and gleaming, standing erect and proud.
My eyes fell on a puddle of clothes at the foot of her bed, a jumbled colourful mess. The piece of clothing that caught my eye was Naomi's lush satin blue bra strategically half hidden right at the top of the pile. It seemed to be peeking out and waving for my attention. For a moment, a cluster of inappropriate pictures of Naomi wearing nothing but that bra materialized in my mind.
"Room's a bit of a mess." Naomi broke me out of my thoughts, smiling sheepishly and may I just add, rather adorably. She was speaking casually to me as though what happened downstairs hadn't happened. I wish I could display that kind of calmness.
I just zoned out staring at her bra. I felt a blush creeping up my cheeks as the images refused to disappear, hovering in front of my eyes like a solid mist. A slight wetness started to form in my knickers. My face immediately flushed and I lowered my head, trying to use my fringe to hide my face. Fuck! I was easily getting turned on again, first from kissing Naomi, and now from her lingerie. When did I turn into such a teenage boy with raging hormones? When did such triviality start such a catastrophic reaction in my hormones?
I dropped my bag and moved awkwardly, almost frantically to her bookcase with the intention to hide my face, willing it to return to its rightful colour. I glanced briefly at the spines of the books. She had the whole series of Harry Potter, A Song of Ice and Fire, Lord of the Rings and many literature books. You can also tell a lot about a person from the books they read. If you didn't know Naomi, you'd think she just all brawn and no brains. She wasn't. She was smart and got A's in her other subjects; apparently she was only hopeless at math. Some people were like that. But I had no idea Naomi was a secret bookworm.
Turning back to Naomi with the intention of complimenting her taste in books when I saw her propping her crutches against the wall, pulling off the duvet and settling in on the left side of her bed. My words never made it out. I mean – like why is she getting into bed? Aren't we supposed to be studying? Shouldn't we try to use that cluttered desk or the floor and not her bed? My mind was freaking out, jammed, stuck in a traffic of a fluster of thoughts. My body knew not what to do. Was I expected to climb in on the other side beside her or take up residence in that swivel chair at the desk that was just as tantalizingly close to the bed?
Needless to say, I chose the swivel chair. I let what is left of my composed mind to dictate my actions because seriously, she wouldn't exactly want me to climb in next to her right? I mean, come on.
I know we don't belong
Everyone says it's wrong
We come from different ways
So I try to erase everything that I've felt
I took the steps in the direction of that innocuous swivel chair. I felt like I was being watched. I was. Her blue eyes were trained on my shuffling steps and myself. There was a look in her eyes I couldn't quite place. A hard look, like she was staring right into me. It was almost wanting, the kind that made my body shudder involuntarily. I tried to suppress it. Her tongue came out to wet her lips. I gulped inaudibly, almost reaching out to that swivel chair for assurance and support before I voluntarily crumbled into a Naomi-induced mess. The static between us was crackling. I could feel the hairs on my arms stand to attention. I shakily reached out and habitually tucked my hair behind my ear.
Naomi's hand shot out and grabbed my left forearm. I didn't make it to the swivel chair.
Instead I was pulled, insistently, purposefully and willingly by her hand and fell sideways, bum first into her lap like some dramatic movie scene. A surprised gasped escaped from my mouth but her hand wrapped itself around my neck, pulling my head down and her lips instantly silenced my gasp, kissing me hungrily and fervently. Her other arm came to rest on my waist, her fingertips squeezing my lower back, making me tip my body towards her, half ticklish, half instinctively with want. As if she realised she poked my ticklish spot, she encircled her arms firmly around me, pulling me closer into her.
Then you kiss me and suddenly I don't care anymore
Something in me tells me you're the one I'm looking for.
I held on tightly to Naomi's biceps and squeezed them momentarily before sliding up to rest them tentatively on her shoulders.
For now, it didn't matter that there wasn't any verbal communication on this matter between us. For now, I didn't need to care. The way Naomi was kissing me made me realise that, through the way she was kissing me, she was the one I'm looking for, the one I only ever wanted.
It may seem foolish, wishful and naïve that at the age of eighteen, without any prior relationship experience or any prior form of being romanticized in my life that I could come to a conclusion that Naomi was the only one that I wanted. It is foolish, I admit. But you can't blame me for feeling all these when I'm sitting in the lap of most beautiful girl that I've laid my eyes on and us kissing like we are for eachother.
I moaned in approval as the intensity of our kisses escalated, our tongues doing a delightful water dance with each other. Each thrust and flick of our tongues left an imprint in my senses. I swear I'll remember this sensation forever even when it or I cease to exist.
I slid my hands further up and around her neck, clutching on to the collar of her polo tee like I was drowning and my life depended on it as she broke her kiss and started a delicate trail of kisses along my jaw line, causing me to unconsciously tilt my head up and take shaky breaths while she traced the smooth of my neck with her lips down to my clavicle before kissing her way up and attaching our lips together again. My insides squirmed and twisted themselves into strange beautiful knots as I sighed with approval and breathed the air she was finished with.
Her warm left hand that rested on my knee glided ever so slowly up my thigh leaving a fiery trail of goose bumps in its wake. A sudden rush of heat exploded through my body and filled up my knickers. I gasped and jolted like I was galvanized, dislodging my lips from Naomi's just as her hot tongue was once again in deep territory doing indescribable wonders. We weren't just kissing; we were proper full on snogging each other. It was nothing like the tiny kiss I gave James at the benches. That paled in comparison and seemed to fade into a far off distant hallucination. This was nothing like the kiss Naomi and I shared on my birthday under the shelter and a crumpled muffin. This kiss was I telling her everything that has been bottled up in me since the day my eyes fell on her.
Our foreheads rested against each other's as we both took heavy breaths, calming our frantically racing hearts.
I slowly opened my eyes as I felt her forehead leave mine, feeling a little dazed again after shutting them for so long and so hard, meeting Naomi's crystal blue ones that were staring back into mine. They were as clear as the brightest day in Bristol, the very kind that once captivated and is still captivating me. Her lips were slightly parted and panting, her warm breath mingling and interchanging with mine. They looked sexily swollen, red and puffy, like they were being kissed into their state. I had kissed them into this. And she let me do it.
Her eyes flicked down to my lips and back up to my eyes before she closed them and leant in, placing another slow lingering kiss. This time the kiss was chaste again and full of tenderness. She pulled away before I could lose myself in it again. I surveyed the spectacle in front of me. My very hands that had clutched on desperately had twisted the collar of her lush green polo tee askew; many stray strands of her soft blonde hair had escaped from her already messily tied up ponytail. But she looked ravishing and fucking beautiful.
The corner of her lips twitched up into a tiny smile. "Is this real?" She blurted out a little hoarsely. I could have sworn that it sounded almost of disbelief.
Nevertheless, the question took me by surprise. Wasn't I the one that was supposed to ask that question instead? Was kissing Naomi real or just the best dream I ever had? Was it real that I'm actually sitting in her lap with my knickers sodden and her arms around me? It was all very real indeed. I clamped my thighs tightly together, fully embarrassed and aware that my knickers were absolutely wrecked. Never had anyone or anything brought out such a reaction in me, not in a way that caused my knickers to be slick against my skin.
I smiled at her, returning equal disbelief, as she looked at me softly with a smile of her own and hesitantly reached out her left hand brushed the hair out of my cheek with her fingertips, threading it back behind my ear and cupping my cheek. I automatically leaned against her touch and I reckoned my smile brightened by a few million watts.
"I think so." I replied, realising my voice had become more low and husky from all the kissing. Naomi's eyes widened and she bit those still puffy lips of hers, while another smile threatened to emerge again.
"But how – I mean, when – I thought – " Naomi shook her head a little, like there were too many questions and didn't know where to begin. She took a deep breath and tightened her arms around my waist. I kind of already love that feeling, of being in her warm arms, like she was protecting me, like I'm the one that only mattered as long as I'm in them. "I like you." She said abruptly, looking startled at her own sudden abrupt confession as she bit her lip nervously this time, eyes flicking to mine, like she was waiting and judging my reaction.
I cannot tell you how high my heart soared when I heard those words fall out of her mouth like precious gold nuggets nor how loud a symphony orchestra sang in my chest as my mind waltzed in delirium around those words. I think I've wanted this since the day I met her in secondary school. Probably at that time, with that age, I wouldn't have known it. But today, here, this, something feels really right, something perfect, like something clicked into place. Oh Naomi Campbell, when I first met you, I never knew I would have to spend the rest of my teenage years rearranging my life so there'd be room for you to stay. I think I've liked you ever since I was twelve, going on thirteen, the very day I saw you in school where you walked past me and never knew I existed.
My smile elongated, spreading wide and happy across my face. "I like you too." I said it back, bravely, the very words I had meant to tell her a long time ago.
"Yeah?" Naomi replied with a dazzling smile that seemed to light up the room and outshine the sunrays.
"Yeah."
"But," she continued slowly and unsurely, pausing, completely getting it all out, airing all her concerns, "You don't like James, do you." She was fiddling so nervously with the hem of my top, eyes flicking hesitantly to mine and chewing on that lip of hers. There was something about that lip of hers that was driving me insane, in an aphrodisiac way.
How was it possible that she thinks I still like James even after experiencing this amazing kissing session we just had? I had to make my point clear again. And actions speak louder than words.
A bout of recklessness seized me. I took her head in my hands again and crashed our lips together, kissing her frantically, urgently and deeply as I used my upper body weight to ease her back into her pillows and adjusting myself so I was straddling her hips, trapping her between myself and her fluffy pillows. I kissed her, telling her that I didn't like James, that I liked her, that she didn't need to worry about me changing my mind about that. You should have opened your eyes, I was crazy for you.
Naomi hummed into my kiss as I threaded my hands through her hair and pulling her head impossibly closer. Her tongue swiped steadily over my lower lip and sucked deliciously on it as her hands slid down my back and cupped my ass. I felt my insides undulate, sending another embarrassing gush of wetness. My head was spinning like a carousel. All I could do was prevent myself from automatically grinding into her. She was such a good kisser, not that I had much experience but something about the way she kisses just undoes me.
It made me think whether I was good enough and whether she was experiencing the same things as I was. Or could it be just me.
We gently broke apart, breathing erratically. That's what she does to me; she makes my heart forget how to beat in a normal rhythm.
"Wow." Naomi breathed out. Her eyes were wide with surprise, the hue of her blue irises shining, looking up at me with flushed cheeks. "That was… amazing." She whispered, the corners of her mouth curled up into a soft genuine smile.
And I started to feel shy all over again. I don't know, I just did. No one has told me that my kisses were amazing.
Naomi pushed herself back upright and took my hands in hers. Time just paused as we looked shyly at each other, both of us not really knowing what to say. I took this time to marvel once again at her features, her straight nose, high cheekbones, perfectly shaped eyebrows, the curve of her jaw and flawless skin. My eyes were taking snapshots of this very moment, another epoch of my life.
"When did you know?" My eyes looking down at our hands as her long fingers twined themselves through mine, her thumb tracing circles over the back of my hand. My heart swelled at this simple action that I never experienced in my life till now. "That – you liked me?" I still can't believe it. I need to confirm this; double and triple confirm this. If I told myself two weeks ago that Naomi had a possibility of liking me, I would've thought that I was insane.
"Hmm," she paused, lowering her eyes, searching for an answer. I was afraid of what she was going to say. I was afraid that she realised all this was just a whim. Everything was that fragile to me. She has no idea how tightly I had let her wrap herself around my heart. "It was that time – in that shelter." The side of her mouth tugged up into another shy smile.
"My birthday?" I was rather taken aback. So all that she did, the cake, the hug, the kiss, she did it intentionally. She liked me for that long, a good number of months. I can't quite believe that.
"No no," her cheeks flushed a deeper pink as she untangled our hands and brushed the fringe out of my eyes. She's always doing that but I really like it. My hands came up to smoothen out her collar, which I had absolutely ruined its shape, and straightened the buttons at the front. I was touching her like it was normal, like I was allowed to. "That time in the rain," she mumbled.
My hands froze and stopped fiddling as I stared at her in shock. That was way back, to when I barely knew her, when I thought I was crushing irrationally on her. She liked me for that long? But that was impossible, she had a girlfriend at that time and when you have a girlfriend, aren't you supposed to be madly in love with her, was I the third party?
"Of course," Naomi continued, "I wasn't quite sure. I mean – I just knew you for barely two weeks. I didn't like – know, if you know what I mean." She shook her head and chuckled nervously, thinking she was hardly making any sense. "It was just this tiny feeling, you know, that I slowly realise was that I like you – a lot, more than normal." She lifted her hand and lightly brushed her knuckles against my cheek and smiled shyly, "But I guess – that was the start of it."
My heart kinda did a happy dance again but I was a tad bothered by her relationship with Angela so I asked, "What about Angela?"
She screwed up her beautiful face and gave a frown, apparently thinking how she was going to answer this. I hung on to every second that passed in silence.
"It wasn't working out between us even before you showed up." Naomi kept her eyes on her hands like she had taken a sudden fascination to it. "I mean she was nice – hot – and all that but," she shrugged a little, "We got together too fast without barely knowing each other. It feels different, with you, believe me." She looked back into my eyes and I could see the genuine sincerity pouring right out of them. And I did, believe her, yet it made me more vulnerable that she had control of when or whether she wanted to break my heart.
I gave a brief nod, not wanting to explicitly acknowledge I believed her but also keeping the last piece of myself from her, hoping and wishing she would never break all of me if she did.
"What are we then?" My mouth blurted out before my mind had processed what my heart wanted to ask.
A smile tugged at the corner of Naomi's lips as she enunciated, "My girlfriend now of course." The sparkle was back in her blue eyes, shining, as her arms encircled them once again around my waist. Oh god I love those warm arms around me and that confident smile.
YES. My heart practically screamed in acknowledgement but my mind had other concerns. Don't get me wrong, hearing those words out of Naomi's mouth wanting me as her girlfriend blew my heart right out into the universe. It was soaring right up there flying with all the pretty little galaxies and shooting stars that rained down like confetti on this very noun. But, Naomi was dangerous, having the reputation of changing girlfriends faster then she changed her clothes. How could I be so sure I wouldn't end up in the pile of has-beens eventually? How could I be sure that we weren't getting together too fast? I mean we just kissed or rather snogged each other's faces off and called each other 'girlfriend' without going through the whole chasing and dating thing. Honestly it was all rather overwhelming, having the most popular girl at school tell me she liked me and call me her girlfriend. Even dreams didn't create this much goodness. And honestly, I've never experienced the chasing and being chased game.
"No." I managed to wrestle that word out of my mind and out of my mouth.
Naomi's brow creased and a flash of fear clouded her eyes. She started to remove her arms from my waist but I held them there firmly, making her wait for what I was going to say.
"I think we should take this slowly. We barely know each other – "
"I know you," she interrupted, "You're Emily."
"I mean, you don't know what I like or – "
"You like eating cinnamon rolls. You don't like onions and pickles in your food. You don't like horror movies. You're good at math and – "
God this girl was adorable. Naomi was rattling off the list of things she knew about me. She knew. She paid attention to me. My head was in the clouds. My heart was growing loud and I'm trying to keep it down.
"That's not what I mean." I paused, trying to find the right words. "It's just all too fast and – I never got chased after by anyone." The last sentence came out in a rush and I felt myself flush hard at this admission and I ducked my head, desperately avoiding her eyes.
"Okay." Naomi replied. I could hear that her voice was lightly laced with amusement as she placed her fingers on my chin and tilted my head up. "We'll take this slowly."
I looked at her and saw nothing that resembled skepticism or mockery or any change in her demeanor towards me; she didn't make it a big deal. In fact, she was looking at me fondly, maybe even a little relieved? A smile graced her lips as she sat up a little straighter. It suddenly became apparent to me that I was still in that awkward position, straddling her, but I didn't want to move, it felt comfortable, so natural, and so right.
"Can I kiss you again?"
Naomi asked this with such blunt honesty that I could feel myself totally abandoning this whole take-it-slow constraint that I had gotten myself into. Why was I making this so hard on myself? In this moment, I want nothing more than feel her gorgeous lips on mine and feel the euphoria I'd experienced rushing into me again, making my mind delirious. I want to kiss that hopeful little crooked smile of hers; I want to shove her back into the pillows and ravish her in a way that's totally inappropriate for someone that's not even my girlfriend yet. Yet.
"No…" I dragged out, trying and failing to suppress a smile that slipped out when I saw her wrinkle her nose adorably at my words.
Oh god Naomi you don't know how hard it is to say no to you.
She suddenly leant forward and attempted to attack my lips while I squirmed and twisted my head away in protest as she chased my lips with hers. Darn me and my quick reflexes.
I placed both of my hands on her shoulders, stopping her pursuits and keeping us half an arm's length apart. She huffed, pouted her pink lips and flashed me a pair of bright blue puppy dog eyes and I did all I can to stop myself from surrendering.
"You're such a tease." Naomi said with a whiny voice of a small girl who just got deprived from something she wanted.
"You're such a flirt." I threw back, scrunching up my nose in fake annoyance. Naomi bit her lip and gave me that tilted head sideways look, you know, like that irresistibly fucking sexy look with her eyes that made my insides potentially quiver again. Okay I need to get out of her lap before I really lose all my self-control.
I anchored my left knee on the bed and swung my right leg backwards and away from Naomi, determinedly ignoring her noise of disapproval, and settled into the space beside her, yet keeping a safe distance from her. I instantly missed her body heat and the way I had fit so easily and comfortably on her lap. Miraculously, I've managed to avoid accidentally sitting on her injury after all the mind-blowing kissing we had done. Well just thinking about that makes me suddenly feel very hot again.
Naomi scooted closer to me till our sides were almost touching. It was all rather unfamiliar yet very delightful. My head was swimming in her scent, which seemed to fill up my sensory system and clog up the little pathways my mind uses to think rationally. Our arms were brushing occasionally and I could literally feel bursts of static shoot through my body. Either I was that tensed or that turned on.
Naomi reached over and tried to take one of my hands with hers but I slapped them away playfully. I was serious. I was not her girlfriend yet and I wanted to make sure I was doing this right before throwing myself into a shotgun relationship. We were going to go backwards, trying to enact what was supposed to be before we kissed. Holding hands was too fast. Not yet.
And I keep saying 'yet', like I am assuming everything was inevitable.
"Naomi?" I brought my knees to my chest and hugged them tightly, as she turned her head to me. I was fucking nervous to ask Naomi this. "Can we not tell anyone about this? Can this just be between us?" If there was even an 'us'. I breathed the last word quietly. Even if I had just declared my feelings to Naomi, it didn't mean that I was about to come out waving a rainbow flag and doing PDA's in school. I just wasn't sure, not about liking Naomi, but whether I wanted to be labeled, codified. I wanted to just be me.
"Yeah that's fine with me." After brief moment of hesitation, she returned a nonchalant shrug and a smile.
"Really? I just don't think I want – "
"It's okay Em." She took my hand in hers and I let her this time. Her simple action brought me assurance that it was totally fine with her. She wasn't going to run away or force me to do something I wasn't comfortable with. "No one has to know. This is between us."
Did she say 'us'? Wait a second – am I – no I wasn't her girlfriend but it feels like we were each other's. The line was indelible; it was blurred. I could almost sigh with relief. Why did she feel so perfect? I wanted to kiss her.
Instead I smiled shyly because the way she was looking at me again made me feel like I was the only person she was looking it. I don't know how I can ever get used to it. I think it's still a dream I've yet to wake up from.
"Does it still hurt?" I asked, gently removing my hand from hers and pointing at her leg for a distraction and definitely out of great concern.
"Hmm?" Naomi glanced at her knee and gave a half shrug, "Yeah, a bit – not much. You could kiss me and it'll be better."
Her brilliant blue eyes were sparkling mischievously, daring me and I failed once again to suppress a smile. Her eyes and that quirk on her lips are going to be the death of me.
"Shouldn't we actually start to do some work? That's what we're supposed to do when you made me come up here right?" I playfully said.
Naomi gave a cute grumble under her breath, "Yeah I guess we should. I'm so behind on my coursework."
We ended up on the floor because the bed was really not conducive. And it was fucking hard trying to concentrate when Naomi was sitting at such a close proximity beside me. I don't know if it's intentional or what but she would bend over me when I was I trying to explain something and I could practically feel her body heat and her breath in my ear that sent shivers down my spine.
That night I lay in bed after a shower. For once I was annoyed that Katie was in bed and not staying over at Danny's house because I wanted to squeal with excitement into my pillow or jump around the room with joy. Just thinking about what happened in the afternoon made me smile widely and hear birds singing merrily into my ear. Naomi. The gorgeous Naomi kissed me.
I tossed in my bed, finding another comfortable spot as I shielded the light my phone emitted and looked at the latest text Naomi sent me which was just a simple 'Sweet dreams x." A strangled scream of joy accidentally escaped quietly and I pretended to cough.
"For fuck sake I'm trying to sleep. Cough somewhere will you?" A dead sleepy Katie grumbled and that couldn't dampen my mood.
I coughed a few more times just to irritate her as I turned off my phone and snuggled back into my warm bed.
The dreams were sweet as I dreamt of nothing but fat bookcases, a swivel chair, rugs on floors, blue bras and sweet sighs.
I didn't get a text from Naomi in the morning. I didn't text her either. Getting into a brand new day somehow feels different. Yesterday was history. Maybe Naomi woke up and realised everything was a mistake. I know, I could be just scaring myself shitless. I am new to this after all. But I can't help it. I think about her all the time and it's scaring me how much I yearn to see her. I want to be sure that she kind of still feels the same thing. 'Kind of' would suffice. I don't believe she'll be as crazy over me as I feel over her. Thankfully she didn't ask me when I first knew I liked her. I wouldn't know how to lie. It would be fucking stalkerish and embarrassing if I told her it was all the way in early secondary school. I don't know how she'll take that.
I walked down the hallway, in the midst of changing classes between periods, keeping an alert eye out for my favourite shade of blonde hair. Nothing. Just bunches of students streaming down the hallway. I was working myself up to the brink of anxiousness. I had to see her; I had to know if we still had this thing between us.
"Emily, wait up!"
I turned my head at the sound of James' booming voice. He pushed past a few students in front of him and made his way to me.
"Hi." James greeted me shyly.
I had totally forgotten about James as thoughts about Naomi had completely colonized my mind. I forgot that I had inadvertently led him to think I could possible even like him a little. I felt like shit after kissing him because I knew I couldn't return any of the affection but there was no way to tell him about that. I knew I mustn't lead him on but I was afraid of also losing this friendship we had.
"I was thinking – "
I never heard what James was trying to talk to me about because my attention completely diverted itself when I heard the sound of metal crutches approaching.
My eyes darted to Naomi immediately. She was looking at me with a tiny smile, the kind that wasn't strained or awkward but the type that was trying hard not to burst into an unrestrained and obvious expression of a huge smile. Her eyes were piercing into mine as her smile threatened to crack wider. The effect Naomi has on me was starting up again. My body tingled all over; everything tunnel visioned and noise became a white blur. She still feels the same. My heart started to beat wildly as I confirmed that everything that happened yesterday was real and everything has changed. I'll never ever be able behave in the same way when Naomi's in my direct line of vision.
"Hey Em." Naomi casually leaned against the wall. Everything about her was effortless. Her long hair was straight and she wore an oversized light blue t-shirt with rolled sleeves, accentuating her toned and slim arms. Her black skinny jeans were rolled up at her calves, making her legs look even longer and she finished it off with a pair of beat up red vans. I think I could have drooled at some point of time if I wasn't careful.
How can she possibly appear so calm when my heart was frantically beating at the sight of her? I know I told her to keep this thing between us but I never so much wanted to pushed her up against the wall in the general public have a give her a proper hello. It looks like she has much more self-control over herself than I have.
"So what'd'ya say?" James finished. I didn't get a single word in.
"What?" I replied, totally kicking myself for zoning out so blatantly, especially when I didn't want James to be let on about things between Naomi and I.
"Dinner with me on Saturday?" He asked hopefully, shyly, scratching his head nervously.
"Well I…" I took a sneaky glance at Naomi who was looking at her phone with a slight frown and her mouth in an annoyed line. She looked as though she was pretending not to listen to my conversation with James.
"I don't think I can – I think I'll have to help my mom out at home." I felt so terrible for giving the white lie. I didn't want to continue to lead him on, especially if this dinner was not totally platonic.
"What about Sunday?" James asked again without faltering.
"I – think Katie is making me to go shopping with her." That was true. I glanced at Naomi again. Her expression was kind of blank and not really giving me a clue as to what she was thinking.
"Oh." He looked a little dejected and shuffled his feet. "Maybe some other day yeah?"
"Definitely. We should get the others to hang out together. The more the merrier!" I tried my best to lift the conversation. It probably wasn't what James wanted to hear but he tried his best not to show it.
James grinned again and fluffed my hair. "Alwite gotta go, see yer later lil red. Naomi?"
Naomi pushed herself off the wall and followed after James without taking so much of a backward glance as James waved at me. I was a bit upset at her reaction. She could probably have smiled at me properly. It was like we didn't know each other. This was torture. Just when was I going to see her again?
My phone buzzed indicating a message. I pulled it out expecting to see Katie's message telling me to hurry up and meet her.
Meet me at maths classroom now. – Naomi
My eyes widened and I turned my head back in the direction Naomi went off to. She was nowhere to be seen. The classroom was that way. Excitement rushed through me and I hastened my footsteps, winding my way through students, short of breaking into a run.
I turned the doorknob of the classroom door and slowly pushed the door open in anticipation. Without a warning, a hand reached out and grabbed mine. I gave a tiny squeal and let myself get pulled in. My back was pushed up against the door as Naomi turned the lock.
She placed her hands on either side of my head as she leaned her body in, hovering, barely touching mine, and trapping me. Although she was a few inches taller than I am, she seemed to be towering over me, domineeringly sexy. She was smouldering hot; I could melt in her presence.
I gulped as Naomi drew her face tantalizingly close, eyes boring into mine. Her tongue darted out to wet her lips. This was exactly what I wanted to do to her when I saw her in the hallway. Now I was the one being pushed up against a locked door in an empty classroom without windows. From the way she was looking at me, I was almost sure she was going to kiss me till I saw stars again. Fuck taking things slow. I'd let this be the exception.
"You're so fucking gorgeous." Naomi practically growled the words out. Her voice was low and almost animalist. It was such a turn on. I felt like I was a prey willing to be devoured by her. She brought her lips to my ear and took a deep breath and exhaled. "And you smell so fucking good." I closed my eyes and shivered at those words, relishing the sensation as her warm breath glided over my cheek. Heat rushed to my cheeks and surged through my body. I could feel myself getting wet again. She wasn't even touching me and yet I'm being completely undone. If I turned my head, my lips would definitely connect with hers without a doubt. She was just too close to me. She smelt fucking delicious.
Naomi pulled back a little to stare deeply into my eyes. I could feel her breath on my lips as she whispered shyly, "Go out with me?" My heart rate skyrocketed when I heard those words. A smile split wide and happy across my face and Naomi mirrored that.
"Yes." I nodded. A thousand times yes.
"Saturday?" Naomi asked. "Or do you really have to help your mom?"
"Saturday's perfect." I breathed out watching Naomi's eyes, if possible, light up even brighter just for me.
"Don't ever go out with James okay?" Naomi quietly said.
How could I ever when I'm so completely smitten with you? I wanted to tell her that. Maybe she was slightly jealous and wanted me only for herself. I'll gladly submit myself on a platter to her. She needn't worry about me going out with James.
"I wont." Her smile widened and she removed her hands from the wall.
And she still wasn't touching me. I wanted so, so badly to kiss her but I know I couldn't because I told her we were to take it slow and she hadn't broken that rule. I wished she broke that stupid rule now.
"I was okay out there wasn't I?" Naomi questioned.
I had to ponder for a bit, wondering what she was referring to.
"Because," she continued, "I want so badly just to push you against the wall and kiss you just now – and even right now." That low sexy growl was back again. "But I know you wanna take things slow."
My heart expanded with happiness at those words. All my worrying was needless. Naomi was possibly as crazy about me as I am with her. No I think I'm crazier for her. I get all the crazy points.
The school bell rang. Our next class was going to start soon and unfortunately we were having different classes. It was a miracle that no one was using this classroom for the next period or we wouldn't have this special moment together.
"I better get going first." Naomi straightened up and collected her crutches. "See you on saturday."
"Can't wait." I blurted out almost too eagerly. I could have cringed at myself.
"Neither can I." Naomi said, her voice laced with happiness. She pressed a quick and light kiss on my cheek before unlocking the door. I stepped aside and let her pass.
I leant my back against the door once again; smiling and touching the spot on my cheek she kissed, my heart rate easing back to a normal pace. I know I only considered dating when two people are officially together but I just can't help that these six words keep looping ceaselessly in my mind.
I've got a date with Naomi.
I've got a date with Naomi.