Ludwig x Reader - Betrayal - Part 2

(Ludwigs POV)

A month ago

When _ and I parted after dinner, I went straight to the bar and ordered my first shot of whiskey. I was dead set on going home dead drunk . I had acted like nothing was wrong all through dinner, but it was awkward for me to say the least. Every smile was a forced mask, a formality to pretend that my pride wasn't torn . Why didn't she want me? Didn't she trust me? Why? Was I not good enough for her? My mind swam with these thoughts as I downed my liquor angrily, hoping to dull the pain. I signaled for the ancient bartender for another shot and he just shook his head. "I've seen that look on many a man, I think I'd better just leave the bottle."

I ended up going through almost half the bottle that night before things started to blur together. I remembered nothing more about that night, except for some girl with long red-brown hair. The next morning I woke up in my bed with a pounding head ache, naked as the day I was born and laying next to an equally naked woman. I felt my heart rise up into my throat, headache long forgotten. How could I betray _ ? I looked over at the girl as she was waking up and I jumped up, wrapping the sheet around me, instantly wanting somewhere to hide. It wasn't just some random girl from the bar, It was Felicia. Shit!

She rubbed her eyes, giving me a small smile that I could swear was almost a smirk, as if she had won some kind of prize. "Good morning , Luddy. You were amazing last night." I felt like I was going to vomit. I slept with her, the woman who left me, who said I wasn't good enough. For some odd reason I felt like a hooker. Nothing more than some cheap whore. I hoped to god that I didn't call her up begging to be with her , anything but crawling back defeated and begging. What little pride I had left would be killed if I stooped that low. Pride . . .

I felt my face heat up in anger as I thought of my _ . "Hündin! Was zur Hölle are you doing here?!" Felicia wasn't fazed in the least as she kept her odd smile. "Aw Luddy! Don't cha remember last night at the bar? It was your idea, after all." I felt a fresh wave of embarrassment and rage wash over me. I wanted this? I would willingly betray _ ? My dearest? She sat up and stretched, rubbing her head contentedly. "I ran into you at the bar, dead drunk. You were bitchin' about that girl of yours. How she didn't trust you and such." I sunk back onto the bed, my face in my hands. Last time I go to a verdammt bar to ease my problems. . .

She continued , her smile changing into a smirk slowly. "So, I listened to your troubles like a good friend and you started getting cozy with me. One thing led to another, and well . . ." She winked and chuckled, low and villainous as she continued, her small hands laying to rest on my shoulders. "We ended up making you forget all about Little Miss _, now didn't we?" II resisted the urge to throw up. "I don't remember. Your'e lying! I would never -!" "Oh, boy did you ever cheat on your girl! Let me tell you-" My mind raced, thinking about how to fix my problem as Felicia went over every disgusting detail of what we did .I felt as if her hands were claws , sinking into my shoulders like I was prey. She manipulated me . Thats right, she manipulated me into bed with her! She took advantage of me when I was drunk! I'll just tell _ the truth and -! I couldn't. I just couldn't .The thought of telling her left a lump in my throat.

Felicia moved her head onto my shoulder, her arms wrapping around me like a turned to hiss against my ear "I have a wonderful idea, Ludwig." I managed to shrug her off and glare at her. "Yeah, I have one too. Like you getting ze hell out of my apartment." She gave a fake laugh and continued as if I hadn't said a word. "I was thinking that we could do this more often. You know, get together and have mind-blowing sex, just like last night . . . " I felt like vomiting as she brought it up again. I shook my head, gritting my teeth. When would she leave?! "Nein! I love _! Not you! " She laughed "I never said Love. I said sex . We could be friends with benefits!" I stared in disbelief. "I'm not going to just cheat on her! I love her! " She laughed . "You already cheated on her. Why not do it some more ? Or I can call her up and let her know what we did ~ "
I shook my head. I would do anything to keep her from the truth. "That won't be nessacary ." She squealed with delight. "I knew you'd sees things my way!"

From then on, I cheated on _ almost every night . It turned into the equivalent of a drug for me. When I was with _ , I was sexting with Felicia, not giving _ the attention she deserved . I even canceled plans a couple times to be with Felicia. It sickened me , but I wanted and needed more. She made me feel in control and powerful, like I was important. She would feed my ego, and I would be at her beck and call . I thought less and less of _. Soon I stooped lying to myself about why I was with Felicia. I was with her because I wanted to have sex with her, to feel important, not to hide _ from the truth.

I even forgot about our Anniversary. The morning of our Anniversary, Felicia called me up and told me about a dream she had of us. She said that she wanted to continue where the dream left off. I readily agreed, my mind filled with disgusting thoughts of what was in store when she came over. My mind was so occupied , that I didn't look at my calendar. When Felicia came over, we set to work. We were so caught in the heat of the moment that we almost didn't make it to the bedroom, let alone notice my brother knocking on the door. I wish I would have stopped and answered him. He would have slapped sense into me, before _ found us.

She threw open the door of he bedroom,and I managed to notice her as she fell to the floor. I stopped Felicia, and she just smiled as if this was what she had planned all along. I jumped up, grabbing on my jeans before picking up _. I laid her down on the couch, I couldn't bear for her to lay in the bed were I - were I made an awful mistake... I knelt beside her, petting her hair . In that moment I finally seemed to realize that what I had done was wrong. I shouldn't have doubted _ . She did trust me, she did want me, she just didn't want to go against her morals. I should've known better. I had to tell her the truth. She deserved to know. I no longer cared about my pride if it meant hurting her. She stayed with me, even when I treated her as something replaceable. How wrong I was. She was irreplaceable, a treasure. And I treated her as common, like something I could find anywhere.

She started to stir, snapping me from my self loathing . Her eyes fluttered open, revealing those beautiful (color) orbs that I might never get to look into again. Especially when I told her the truth. She sat up in a hurry, short of breath. She saw me and smiled, as if the mere sight of me made everything right in the world. I didn't deserve her. She threw her arms around me, taking me by surprise. "Oh Ludwig , I had the worst nightmare! You were cheating on me and - " It broke my heart, but I stopped her. How I wish it was a dream. "Schätzchen, _. . . That wasn't a dream." I wanted to die when I saw her face as she pulled away from me. She looked as though I stabbed her. I held her hands , as I started to try and explain . She just looked away from me pulling her hands away. "How could you?" I swallowed and tried to explain, but the words were stuck in my throat. She shook her head and stood up, grabbing her coat.

She walked to the door and I stopped her. "_! Wait!" She turned and slapped me. It felt like I was hit a thousand times by someone twice her size. "Wait for what Ludwig? We're done! " She turned and walked out the door, Leaving me feeling broken, like how she must feel now.