Thank you for the reviews, everyone. Seriously, they mean a lot. :)

Also, this goes along with the suggestion because, hey, why wait?

Warning: maybe not in this part specifically, but hints of slash because I'll do almost anything suggested. nothing explicit though because, well, he's pretty young. Also, insanity.

Disclaimer: don't own anything you don't recognize.

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"On the Nature of Beginnings and Endings"

Sometimes Kenshin is truly convinced the world is laughing at him.

"I'm not a girl," he says, staring wide-eyed at the Shinsengumi man who just killed three people for attacking an unarmed girl. And unarmed or not, Kenshin is most certainly not female nor is he helpless. And the last thing he needs is an enemy to save him, but here the Third Captain is anyway, smirking with blood coating his sleeves.

He says, "I see. Well, Kyoto at night isn't safe for little boys either."

Kenshin's hands curl into fists at his side. Normally he isn't this easy to annoy, but in the course of one night he had someone accidently injury him, Okami mother him worse than usual, and Katsura give him a lecture on how he promised to tell him next time he started to feel like this (and, well, it had admittedly happened twice before so there is reason to worry). And now here he is, walking around all innocently without a katana because it's not like anyone knows what he looks like, thinking that no one is low enough to attack a kid unarmed, but naturally it had to happen anyway. And naturally the leader of a group actively trying to sniff him out and kill him is the one who saves him.

Really, this has to be one huge, sick joke.

"I'm thirteen," he says. "I'm not a little boy."

Saito Hajime, Third Captain of the Shinsengumi and one of Kenshin's greatest adversaries, crosses his arms. "That's still a far cry from being an adult, kid," he says and Kenshin feels his brow twitch. Typically he doesn't show this much emotion, but he's so irritated with himself and the day in general that he's having trouble with his body language and facial expressions. He came out here to get some fresh air and just be a normal, every day citizen for once. Getting ambushed by a group of opportunist criminals wasn't part of the original equation.

Then the man's voice changes to something more commanding and he says, "Look straight, boy."

Since he doesn't want to start trouble, he ignores the screaming in his mind telling him to get out of there and instead turns his face so that he's looking in Saito's general direction. He isn't sure what his eye color is right now, but he hopes it won't change anytime soon. The hand moves out faster than he anticipates and roughly grabs his chin, forcing him to look up. Blood rolls down his face. He stupidly hadn't bandaged it, thinking it was done bleeding. And it had been until about two minutes ago.

"Did they do this to you?"

"Yes." It's a blatant lie, but answering "No" will inevitably lead to "Why" and he doesn't care enough about looking suspicious by evading the question or making up a story. Instead, he says, "You shouldn't be here."

The man quirks a brow. "Really?" he says. "Why's that?"

"You're the Shinsengumi. This isn't your territory."

If he thinks that it's weird that a kid knows this, he doesn't let it on. Not that Kenshin's a kid, of course - No, thirteen is plenty old enough. Saito says, "I can go wherever I please. Isn't that what you're doing?" He stays silent. "What were you thinking, coming out here?"

Kenshin shrugs. "Just wanted to go for a walk," he answers, which is true.

(later, though, once the nightly walks begin regularly, that is the reasoning less and less)

Saito's eyes scan him in a disbelieving sort of way before he says, "Right. Do your parents know you're out here?"

"No."

He doesn't want to say he doesn't have parents either and more than anything he wants this conversation can end so he can leave this alleyway littered with the dead bodies of his "attackers." That and he's still a little sore about the girl comment because even though he's dressed like his own gender, looks like his own gender, and for the most part acts his own gender, he's even had drunk Ishin Shishi flirt with him. It isn't his fault that he seems borderline unable to gain weight.

To make it worse, Saito's look of amusement drops a little, like he doesn't believe kids should go behind their parents' back. Either that or he doesn't like the idea of parents not noticing their kid leaving. Both work, Kenshin supposes it. "Someone should probably tell them not to let their thirteen-year-old son wander off on his own."

"I'm fine."

"Clearly." Again, there's a silence and Kenshin's eyes twitch in the direction of the attackers. He wants so badly to think of the Shinsengumi as evil, but if he'd come across someone unarmed getting attacked in an alley in the middle of the night, he'd have the same reaction. "Well, at least do something about your face."

He reaches up, touching the cut. How the hell is it still bleeding anyway? It's not like it's that deep. Then he repeats, "I'm fine."

But his unknowing enemy is already pulling out a cloth and handing it over. "Keep this pressed on it until you get home," he tells him and since he's too shocked, Kenshin accepts it. It's already folded into a rectangle the size for his face and he places it lightly against it. The contact hurts. When he doesn't move right away, the man frowns are adds, "What're you waiting for? Leave. Go home."

And he can honestly say that he has no idea what goes through his head when he answers, "I don't want to."

Saito's eyes narrow. "Excuse me?"

Again, he shrugs. "I don't feel like being inside. I like Kyoto at night." Of course, no sane person would say this (not that he is sane, but he likes to cling to the childish belief that he is, in fact, mentally stable) and the strengthening of the suspicion on the man's face proves that he isn't the only one who thinks so. "What? I had a bad day. I mean, I think after being attacked and getting called a girl, it can't get much worse anyway."

Normally he doesn't talk this much and if he were thinking straight, maybe this realization would've worried him. But he's feeling weird, trapped in his own head and like the only way out is to spew something random and have a person notice him as Himura Kenshin, some kid wandering around Kyoto alone after dark rather than Himura Battousai, Ishin Shishi's number one hitokiri whose name people fear to say. Maybe Saito Hajime will even kill him, but by this point he honestly can't care - (and this is exactly what Katsura fears).

"Are you -" Saito pauses, then throws his hands up in defeat. "You know what? It's your fault if you have a run in with the Battousai or another hitokiri, not mine."

Now it's his time to smirk and later, when he looks back on his actions, he truly has to wonder what was going through his head. "I don't have to worry about that," he says. "They're not going to hurt me."

Suddenly the man's eyes sharpen. He's taking a gamble here and he knows it. "Oh?" says Saito. "Are you part of the Ishin Shishi?"

"I thought thirteen-year-olds were just kids."

Even though there's no facial change, Kenshin knows he hit a nerve. He looks younger than he actually is, no denying it, and probably the defying of an authority figure on its own is a little off. What Saito doesn't know that if they were on the same side, he'd probably be a higher rank on skill set alone.

"Your parents?"

"I never said that."

Considering the utter lack of effort put into hiding his swordsman ki, Kenshin obviously isn't viewed as a threat. He rarely ever is outside of those who work with him, and the only other person this open around him is Katsura. The feeling is bizarre, to say the least.

Saito practically growls in annoyance. "Shinsengumi have permission to torture those withholding information about the rebellion," he says and Kenshin purposely doesn't dodge when he's suddenly pressed against the wall, though it is slightly embarrassing realizing that he doesn't even go up as far as the man's shoulder. "Are you involved in the Ishin Shishi, kid?"

Since he doesn't feel like straight up lying, he evades the question and says instead, "I have a name, you know." The pressure across his collarbones pauses. "It's Kenshin. Himura Kenshin."

There's a moment where Saito is presumably running the surname through his internal list of rebels before he finally releases him. There'll be a bruise there by morning. "I'm letting you off for now, Himura," he says, "but I don't want to see you this close to Shinsengumi territory again. You might get hurt."

Saying anything else will get him in worse trouble than even he's willing to deal with, so he says, "Thank you for helping me."

Saito watches until he's gone.

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"I thought I told you not to come this close again."

It's been almost a week since Kenshin first ran into the Shinsengumi man leader and here they are again, but on a bridge this time, facing each other. Again, he isn't armed but he just needed to get out and think. The assassination today had been especially bad because ten people gave the last man just enough time to scream for mercy, saying that his daughter needs him. And Battousai might be heartless, but in truth he's just Kenshin by a different name and Kenshin isn't as ruthless as he should be.

More sullenly than he wants to, he answers, "I don't know where I am."

Unfortunately, this is true. When he's given a job, he's also given specific directions and he doesn't go out enough during the day to really memorize every nook and corner of this city. And he's ended up on this same bridge about four times already. Saito tells him, "You're currently in Shinsengumi territory," which catches him off guard.

"Oh." He pauses and Saito looks at him evenly. "So how do I get out?"

He refuses to believe that one of the most feared men in Japan just rolled his eyes at him. "Turn around," he says, "take your first left, then the third right. You'll be away from the edge of neutral territory by that point. Good enough, boy?"

"How do you get back to the marketplace?"

He's pushing his luck and he knows it, but he really is lost right now and he can't exactly give the spot of an assassination as his point of reference even though odds are that they're closer. He can feel Saito's aggravation rising. "Just walk in the opposite direction of here," says the man. "You'll fine it eventually."

"Okay."

"Now will you go home?"

If he didn't know any better, Kenshin might say Saito is worried about him. "Probably not," he answers with a shrug, "but I'll head back that way."

Again comes that spike of suspicion in his ki, but it's a different kind. He asks, "What's your problem with home, boy?"

"Kenshin." What's with people and their inability to use his name? "Just call me Kenshin, please."

(in retrospect, telling the enemy his real name was a foolish thing to do, but Saito was more foolish in never spreading this insight after everything goes to hell)

Exasperation now. He's putting too much effort into reading this man. "All right, then, Kenshin." He stresses his name like he's humoring him. "What's your problem with being home at night?"

He looks away, suddenly uncomfortable, drumming his fingers against the wood of the bridge railing. Though his life is so shrouded in secrecy, he rarely ever tells real lies. Just omits a lot of truths. "I don't like it," he says, which is true enough. He likes being out here without his weapons because even then he isn't powerless and people's eyes skip over him. On nights like this, he's like any other thirteen-year-old in the city, though one with red hair and purple eyes.

By this point he's somewhat surprised that Saito hasn't left but here he is anyway, moving closer rather than farther away, leaning his elbows on the bridge rail and looking over the water. He must really be bored. "Most people hate their parents at your age," he says, which makes Kenshin wonder more than he wants to. "It's a teenager thing."

"I liked my parents." Though by the end he didn't. He doesn't even like to think about them now because thinking about them means thinking about everything else and repression really is his best friend. "I just...I don't know. Don't like sleeping or something, I guess. Or, well, I do, but I can't if that makes any sense."

"Soldiers get like that," Saito says, which is a roundabout way of telling Kenshin he's like that too. But he's not a soldier and being a hitokiri makes everything a thousand times worse. He should care but he doesn't anymore because apathy is the easiest way to live even though he feels trapped in his own head and alone even in crowds and crowds of people. The man's brows furrow in what seems like concentration. He adds, "I don't care what happens at home tomorrow night, but don't go wandering around."

Even though he wants to at least pretend to be normal at the moment, he's still a member of the Ishin Shishi and has to control himself not to show any perk of interest. Instead he looks confused as he asks, "Why?"

Saito pushes away from the rail. "Just don't," he answers and heads in the opposite direction. And right before Kenshin moves away as well, he hears, "And the name's Saito Hajime, if you were wondering."

He turns in surprise, but the man's already gone.

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There's an envelope. The name is Tanaka Hideyoshi and he's a member of the Shinsengumi. The group is planning an attack that he's supposed to intercept and this is what Saito must have been talking about. And even though he's been friendly lately with one of the leaders, Kenshin is not opposed to killing the others. There will be no clean up crew tonight, because this is far from a normal assassination; this is a warning.

The kill is quick, five men in total, and no one has time to scream. He's getting better, faster, and most of all he's beginning to care less and less, or so it feels like. Because then there will be moments like this when reality decides to warp and every body he stands near is looking at him, leering, and with no clean up crew there's no one to -

"Okita, I smell blood."

Saito's voice, even far away, is enough to force him out of this and the dead bodies go back to being dead bodies, silent and soulless, crow food eyes staring off lifelessly in whatever direction the man managed to fall. Not wanting to be seen, he flees, trying to keep the lingering voices out of his head.

When he gets back, it's Katsura who's waiting for him and not Okami and normally Kenshin has to go see him rather than the other way around. "No Ishin Shishi casualties tonight," Katsura says, giving him a smile that quiets his mind. "Are you hurt at all?"

He goes to shake his head, but pauses. Then he says, "My face started bleeding again. I didn't do anything, but it split open again on its own."

Katsura comes over and holds up the light to see his face. He only reaches his shoulder. "It's stopped," he tells him. "I'll have a doctor look at it tomorrow, though. The fact that it won't heal isn't good."

Eventually, after the mandatory injury check that will hopefully become unnecessary soon, Kenshin's allowed to go to bed. For the first time in a while, he falls asleep immediately.

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Two nights later, Saito asks, "Did you listen to me?"

"Yes," he answers, which isn't entirely a lie. He was out, but he wasn't wandering aimlessly. And since it's already hit the paper and him knowing isn't out of the ordinary, he says, "Did it have anything to do with the Shinsengumi attack? I read what happened."

Apparently Saito wants to avoid talking about the war too because instead of answering he says, "You can read?"

How many people were under the automatic assumption that he was illiterate shouldn't annoy him but always manages to anyway. "Yes," he repeats. "I can write too and I like books."

Again, he receives that piercing, analyzing look that he stands impassive against. "Are you the son of a samurai?" he says.

"No, I'm the son of a farmer." He hasn't said this to anyone but Katsura in years because he tries not to remember this either. Blocking out anything before the age of nine has done well by him so far, though sometimes he tries to recall what his family looked like. Over time, it's becomes harder and harder. "A radish farmer, to be specific, though I think there was a goat at one point too, or it might've been a sheep. My mother wouldn't let me name it."

"A farmer," says Saito skeptically. "A farmer in the city of Kyoto."

And, because he's speaking compulsively by this point, he answers, "My parents are dead. I was sold to slave traders."

This time the man doesn't even bother trying to hide his surprise. "You're -" he starts, but Kenshin shakes his head.

"I was taken in by someone else," he explains. "All the traders were killed." Uncomfortable now, he changes the subject before Saito can ask for elaboration and instead says, "I better leave, it's probably nearing around two in the morning. Enjoy the rest of your night, Saito-san."

"Try to get some sleep, Kenshin," the man says, and Kenshin likes hearing his real name from more than one person for once. "See you soon, I assume."

It's an actual goodbye for once, and marks the beginning of many others.

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I hate the ending. Absolutely hate it. Hope you enjoyed the rest of it, though, guys! Feel free to suggest!