"Roza... Youre pregnant... What am i supposed to think?" he asked, frustration laced in his tone as he opened his eyes and looked at me.
I knew this looked bad, i knew he would think the worst. Its supposed to be genetically impossible for dhampirs to have babies with other dhampirs, i still had no idea as to how it happened, all i knew was that Dimitri was the only person i had ever, ever slept with. I just had to make HIM know that... But how? How do you try to prove the impossible?
I searched his face, not sure what i was looking for exactly. "i never slept with a moroi... Ive never been unfaithful to you, even after you left i never slept with anyone else." i spoke as firmly as i could, staring into his eyes, hoping with everything i had that he would believe my words.
He stared back for a moment before looking away, i could see the doubt in his eyes. Of course he wouldnt believe it, of course he would think i was weak and had run to the first person to offer themself to me after he abandoned me. "i dont know how to prove it to you Dimitri... But i wouldnt lie to you about something like this, i wouldnt try to make you believe something that wasnt true. If you trusted me at all you would know that." i spoke, looking down at my stomach, i rubbed circles on it, " this child will grow up knowing who his father is... Even if his father doesnt believe it." i said with complete certainty
I would tell him all about his father and what a great man... Great guardian he is. And maybe... Just maybe... One day Dimitri would see the truth, he would believe i was telling the truth and accept this child as his. I closed my eyes tight as a tear slipped from my eye trailing its way slowly down my cheek.
"Roza... Why have you never mentioned this before... You wrote me so many letters But you never mentioned this...not once..." he whispered, i could hear pain and saddness in his voice.
I flinched slightly as his hand came up and wiped the tears from my eyes. I looked up at him to see his eyes, they shone slightly in the light. I shook my head side to side slowly,
"i did... I did write you letters... I just never sent them... I didnt want you to come back just because of him..." i whispered, there was no way i could speak normally, the fear and hurt i felt wouldnt let me.
"what do you mean you did? Why didnt you send them? Roza, if we're having a son i had a right to know from the very start." he stated, placing a finger under my chin and lifting it slightly. I could tell he was struggling not to get frustrated,
I held back a sob, "Dimitri you dont understand... You said you left to protect me... I felt like you abandoned me... Would you have really thought any different about being able to protect your charge if i told you that you were going to be a father? It would have just added to your reason to stay away...and... And i was being selfish. I wanted you to WANT to come back... Come back for me..." i choked out.
"oh Roza..." he started, but let his voice trail off as he sighed, "you kept this a secret from me Roza... You say im the father but... Were you ever going to tell me?... When is he due?" he asked me, the hand that wiped the tears was now cupping me cheek. I leaned slightly into him, itd been so long since i felt his touch, i shivered slightly as i felt the familiar tingle run through me.
I let out a breathe, "2 days ago..." i whispered.
Dimitri stiffened slightly, i looked at his expression and my heart stuttered. He was looking at me with a mix between awe and love. There wasnt a hint of anger in his face like i had expected. He placed a single hand on the top of my stomach and looked down at it.
"youre telling me the truth... Its really my child in there?" he asked, still looking at my baby bump.
"its your baby boy." i whispered smiling down at his hand. I had to stifle a small laugh as the baby kicked his hand hard from inside, the look on Dimitris face was priceless, it almost took my breath away. But i was so sad and mad at myself, this shouldnt be the first time hes feeling his son kick, he should have been here from the start. Who was i to stop him, even if he hadnt come back for me.
"come on guys, were leaving for dinner now..." Christian spoke stepping into the doorway, he trailed off slightly as he took in the scene before him. He knew i hadnt told Dimitri about the baby before. His face flushed a little as he realised he had just walked in on a special moment, "...sorry..." he murmured stepping away quickly.
I shook my head again, a smile etched its way onto my lips. And as if on cue My stomach rumbled loudly. Dimitris answering chuckle swirled around me like music, i hadnt realised how much i missed it until i heard it again.
Just as i was about to step past him he surprised me by pulling me into a hug, squishing my stomach between us. "im so sorry Roza, you should have told me... I would have come back to you, i should have been here from the start..." he whispered into my hair.
"no Dimitri... Like i said, i didnt want you to come back because of him... I wanted..." i trailed off, not wanting to go into detail again, so instead i just pulled him towards the door, "come on, its dinner time." i said smiling brightly. I still felt the pain and turmoil inside. Not knowing why he came back, why he was here with Tasha of all people, and what would he do now that he knew?
'Rose?' Lissa asked warily through the bond. I dropped Dimitris arm straight away and turned to where she was walking towards us down the hall.
"im ready whenever you are Liss" i smiled at her. She seemed a little shocked at my more cheerful mode change, but she shrugged it off. She knew i wouldnt talk to her about it right now, but eventualy she would get it out of me. She had a nack for interrogation.
I walked silently behind Lissa, Christian and Tasha, as we wandered down the main street of court. I only half listened as they chatted away about things going on with the courts politics and Tashas martial arts. Dimtri was walking silently beside me, his gaze was distant, i could tell he was lost in thought and i didnt have it in me to drag him out of it. Hearing that youre going to be a father was a very big deal, and the fact that he was hearing about it right before its birth was another deal entirely. I wouldnt be surprised if he was in shock right now.
I also knew that he must have set up a life for himself in Russia, and i wouldnt tear him away from it for the sake of a child. As much as i wanted my son to grow up with parents the way that i didnt get to, i wasnt going to force his father into anything. If Dimitri decided to leave then i would let him go for a second time without a fight.
"Rose we're here" Lissa called, breaking me out of my own thoughts as i realised the whole group had stopped but id kept walking. I grinned sheepishly.
"whoa, its not like you to walk straight past a donut shop Rosie!" christian replied snarkily, i shot him a glare that told him to shut up before i hurt him, and i smirked as his face paled slightly.
We entered the brightly lit restaurant and found a table, i sat down in a chair and was surprised when Dimitri took the chair next to me. with Lissa and Christian taking the opposite side and Tasha sitting at one end between Dimitri and Christian.
We all ordered our food, with me ordering the most, obviously, but come on, im eating for two so im allowed. Halfway through the meal, i was chatting to Lissa about a trip she was planning in a couple of weeks, and Chrisitan and Tasha were off in their own conversation, i got a big surprise when i felt a hand creep onto my thigh. The familiar tingle of electricity shot through me and i looked over to see a smile twitching at the corner of Dimitris mouth, he glanced at me for a second, the only emotion i could see was love, complete and unconditional love.
It surprised me so much i didnt even hear what Lissa had been saying.
"huh?" i asked tuning back in, and trying to suppress the urge to grab Dimitri and kiss him right here and right now. she sighed, clearly exasperated but repeated herself.
"when do you have to go see the doctor again?"
I thought about it for a second, "well i saw him two days again and he said i would have to go back tomorrow or the next day if baby didnt hurry himself along." As i spoke Dimitris hand, that was still resting on my thigh, started rubbing small soothing circles with his thumb.
He was seriously confusing me, did this mean he was ok with it? That he believed me? Why wasnt he mad? He should be absolutely furious with me...i mean i wasnt complaining at all... It was just slightly confusing to not know what he was thinking...
"So Rose, i dont mean to be rude... Im just curious... Will the father be around for the birth?" Tashas voice pipped up, id almost forgotten she was here... Almost.
I didnt know how to answer that, i didnt know whether to be honest or to just flat out lie. "well..." i started before being abruptly cut off.
"Yes, he will be... If its ok with you that is?" Dimitri spoke up, turning his question towards me.
I froze in shock, that was unexpected! This man wasnt ceasing to amaze me today. I was aware of my mouth opening and shutting a couple times but nothing coming out. I blinked a few times, before clearing my throat, "uhh of course."
His answering smile was dazzling, it almost made my head spin. I was getting slightly lost in his deep glistening brown eyes when Tasha spoke again,
"what?... Im...confused..." she said looking at both of us and shaking her head slightly as if that would make things seem clearer to her. I looked at her and then back at Dimitri, i figured since he showed up with her then if he wanted her to know then it was his decision wether to tell her or not.
"Tasha... It appears that Roza.. Is having my baby." he beamed at her. He looked so happy... So proud... That it took my breath away.
We all watched as emotions flew across her pale moroi features, she looked stunned and confused untill she blinked and her face grew furious. She abruptly stood up, causing her chair to scrape backwards noisily amd she slammed her hands on the table.
"What the hell are you talking about?! Thats impossible, we all know it is, shes obviously lyng to you, to all of you apparently" she waved one hand towards Lissa and Christian.
"no, im not. Not that its anyones buisness but mine, ive never slept with anyone except for him. He trusts me enough to know that im telling the truth. This child is his." i calmy said back, though i could feel myself getting angry.
"bullshit! Youre nothing but a lying, cheating bloodwhore wannabe! You couldnt handle the fact that he willingly left you! So you went and got knocked up straight away and are trying to pass off some bastard moroi child as his! Well im not falling for it!" she yelled back at me.
I stood up, knocking over the large cup of water that was infront me as i did, causing it to spill all over me and the ground but i didnt care, i was beyond angry, i was furious now. I knew we were causing a scene but i was beyond caring. How dare she!
"who the hell do you think you are!? You dont know me, you know nothing about me! I would never cheat on him! I know exactly why he left, i didnt fight him, i didnt stop him! I chose not to stop him! You need to-" i was abruptly cut off as i felt a shift in my stomach, it wasnt my babies normal movement, it wasnt just a kick or a flip, this was like him dropping lower, i gasped in shock just as a sharp intense pain tore through my body and i screamed out, doubling over clutching my stomach in pain.