Chapter 7

I awoke to Bailey gasping for air. She rolls over and I pretend to still be asleep. I don't want her to think I was awake staring at her back tattoos and thinking about how much I wanted to find more. I feel the mattress move and I open my eyes. "Hey, what are you doing? Get your sexy ass back over here." I growl at her.

She stops briefly and smiles at me. "I'm just getting something to drink, go back to sleep."

I settle back in the bed and I finally fall into a deep sleep.

I pull my Southern Comfort from the cabinet and grab a shot glass from my collection. I need to calm my nerves. "This dream is killing me." I think to my self. "Was the dream because Paul showed up, or because I slept with Johnathan?" I down a few shots and return the bottle to its hiding place and rinse the shot glass. I know I won't be able to sleep, so I pull out my new Dan Brown book and try to focus on reading. About five minutes in, and I realize that I can't focus on reading, so I set the book down and sneak into my room to get dressed.

I get in my car and head to Duggan's just to be around people. I can't think straight with him in my house! The place is packed tonight. I see a familiar car in the lot and pull up beside it. Smiling, I walk inside to see my buddy sitting at the bar.

"Nick! What the hell are you doing here?" I ask as I walk over to hug my old friend.

"Couldn't sleep. I thought a little night life might tucker me out." He smiles and hugs me back. "What are you doing here?"

"Maybe we should get a table for this discussion." I say. I turn to the bartender and order a drink. "Jack and Coca Cola please?" I grab my drink and we find a table in the corner.

I tell Nick what happened with Paul and a condensed version of what happened with John and the fact that I had the dream again. Nick sits there shaking his head. "I thought that after I left Paul, the dreams would stop. Maybe I dreamed the dream because he showed up? I haven't dreamed that dream since a few weeks before I left him."

"I don't know, Bai. You have to figure that out on your own. But I do have a suggestion…go see someone and talk to them about it. Tell them about everything that has occurred in your life. I mean, hell, after you told me what happened to you as a kid and how your husband messed up your head, I need a therapist to get over that shit!"

"You don't think that I know that, Nick? I know I need to. I am scared, man. What if it doesn't help?"

"It will help. I will pay for your drink, now get back to that man that looks at you like you hung the moon." Nick teases.

I grin and walk out the door to head home.

John is awakened by a noise in the room and he looks up to see Bailey sliding back in bed. "'Bout time you made it back to bed." John says sleepily. "Hey, why do you smell like smoke? You don't smoke and you hate the smell."

Bailey sighed and stretched, "Just go back to sleep. I'm exhausted and I really don't feel like talking right now"

"Ok, but tomorrow you have some explaining to do." John yawns and snuggles in close to Bailey.

In the morning, Bailey is already up and in the shower. John can't shake the strangeness of last night. He keeps thinking about how she got up and didn't come back to bed until late. He obsessed over why she smelled of whiskey and cigarettes when she came back. Was she seeing someone else? Did she leave while he was asleep to meet with this other guy? What about Nick the mechanic, could she be seeing him?

"Why do I care, we just had sex. That was all. She doesn't have to be with just me. We aren't exclusive." He said to himself. John just couldn't get these questions out of his head. He needed to go. He needed to think this through.

Just then, Bailey walks out of the bathroom fresh from the shower. "So, what are you going to do today?"

"Well, I have to go to Australia for the Captain's Tour in a few days. I thought I might get started on packing and closing up my house." John said as he pulled on his boots. He decides to wait to ask her all of those questions until he was ready. He had a feeling he didn't want to know.

"Ok. I have things to do as well and the girls are coming home today from their friends house. So, we might go exploring or something. Who knows what we may do." Bailey said as she pulled her sneakers on. "Maybe I'll see you when you get back. If you want…"

"Yeah, maybe." John said. He planted a kiss on her lips and left without another word.

Bailey didn't mind, she had more important things on her mind. She was going to try to get her life straight, and the first thing she had to do was talk to Paul. They had some unfinished business to deal with and the girls would love to see him as well.

I walked down the hall towards Paul's room and stopped in the doorway. "May I come in?" I ask, quite unsure of myself.

"Why not…" Paul grunted

He looked bad. John had broken his nose, busted his lip in two places, and broke a few ribs. He was sitting up watching the sports channel and looking a little loopy from the pain meds. Nick was sitting in the corner looking uncomfortable.

"I am going to check on my shop. I have a new guy working for me and I am not sure I can fully trust him yet." Nick said as he walks over and kisses my cheek. "Be nice, woman."

I smile at Nick and turn to Paul, sitting in the chair by the bed. "Well, uh…he did a number on you didn't he?"

Paul cuts his eyes towards me but doesn't say a word.

"I suppose you want an explanation why I chose Alaska over you. I don't really think that you deserve one now. I don't know what you were thinking, just breaking in to my house like that." I sigh as he turns his head to look me in the eye through his half swollen eyes.

"Bailey, I don't want an explanation why you left me. I knew that when you got the opportunity to leave, you would. I see why you chose to move here, it is beautiful here. I went crazy though, I thought you were keeping the kids away from me. When they didn't want to talk to me, I freaked out. I am sorry I over reacted. Nick brought the kids to me and they explained everything to me. If you will, please forgive me?"

"Paul,' I said while standing up. "I forgive you. I am not the one you should be making amends with though. It's the kids. You have never been there for them. You are only there when it was convenient for you. But at other times, you would ignore us. We didn't deserve that. And the mental crap you pulled with me…I never knew how to act around you! Now, I don't have to put up with that and I am happier. Listen, I have decided to not press charges on you. In return, when you get better I want you to leave and not come back here. We will still have the girls come see you every summer and you never have to see me again. Deal"?

"Deal." Paul said as he settled against his pillows. "Now let me get some rest."

I walk out without another word. I feel better than I have felt in a long time. "Now on to the more hurtful skeletons in my closet…"