Chapter 13: Taking Risks and Calming Nerves
Saturday, September 17, 1977

Another morning waking up in James's arms?

Yes, I think I could get used to this.

I hoisted myself up enough to see the clock on the bedside table. Nine-thirty. Not too shabby. Breakfast ends at eleven on Saturdays, so I might as well wake up Sleeping Beauty here. Need to make sure he eats a good breakfast and lunch since Quidditch trials are this afternoon.

I laid my head back down on his pillow, facing him. I began stroking his hair gently. Going to do this nice and slow. I don't need a repeat of Tuney at Christmas those years ago.

After about a minute or two of this, he stirred. He opened his eyes slowly, then smiled.

"I was so happy to see you in here when I returned from rounds," he said. "I noticed your door was shut, so I assumed you were in there. I was pleasantly surprised to realize I was wrong."

"I didn't want to spoil the surprise," I admitted, still stroking his hair.

"How was Slug Club?" he asked. I moaned and rolled over to shove my face in the pillow. "That bad, huh?"

I uncovered my face enough to reply coherently. "He kept trying to show me off. Brought up the Patronus, then my relationship with you. 'Oh, you know how to pick them, my Lovely Lily. Head Boy and captain! My, my!'" I said, doing my best imitation of Slughorn. "It was mortifying," I added, then put my face back in the pillow.

James laughed. "I'm sorry, Lils."

I rolled back on my side to face him. "I told Slughorn off. Well, I was subtle about it. I eloquently told him to 'sod off.'"

"Was the rest of the company at least pleasant?"

"Besides Regulus, yes. But you know him. Sev was actually pleasant. Asked me why you guys weren't targeting him, too. I told him that I made you all promise not to since he wasn't the one harassing me that night, so he thanked me."

"He wasn't upset over what we did to his friends?"

"Actually, no. He was irritated but that was all. Actually said they deserved it."

"Why are you nice to him?" he asked softly. "He flip-flops all the time towards you. One moment, he's civil and the next he's as bad as Avery and Mulciber."

"I know our friendship is done but I stay nice to make things easier, for one. Don't need the extra stress, especially in our final year. Then two, I feel as the least I can do for myself is be nice to honor what we had. He was there when I had no one else. He was the major part of my childhood and who I became today. I'm not about to turn my back on it." I smiled at him.

"Understandable," he said, leaning in to kiss my forehead. "So, breakfast?"

I nodded. "Meet me downstairs?" I kissed him quickly and jumped out of bed and to my room. I noticed 'Nola wasn't there, which didn't shock me. She sometimes would fly back home, being fond of my father and all. He'd buy mice for her instead of the owl treats I give him to give her.

I changed and went to the common room, once again getting startled by a form on the sofa.

"Morning," Sirius said.

"Could you please stop that?" I told him.

"Don't know how we could warn you," Remus said from the chair. I jumped again, I didn't see him there.

"You two are going to be the death of me," I told them, trying to catch my breath from my double scare.

"And then where will I be?" James said from behind me, leaning in to kiss my neck. Luckily, I heard his footsteps coming. I didn't want people to think I was extra jumpy today.

"Man, Prongs, is it really necessary to do all that in front of us?" Sirius said, slight tone of disgust seeping through the joking tone he intended. "Wormtail doesn't feel well," he added. "He's staying in bed today."

"What's wrong?" James asked.

"He found Padfoot's Firewhiskey," Remus said, shaking his head.

"He never was the smartest drinker," James said, a slight laugh to his voice. "And you didn't share your stash of hangover potions, because?"

"They were next to the Firewhisky. He should have grabbed them. He brought it on himself," Sirius nonchalantly replied.

"What if he just didn't see them there?" I asked.

"I put them in neon bottles so even I wouldn't be dumb enough to leave them behind," Sirius replied.

"At least he admits he is dumb enough to forget them otherwise," Remus mumbled through a laugh.

"To breakfast?" I asked the group, trying to distract Sirius before he attacks Remus with one of my belongings. My distraction was successful and we all went through the portrait hole and down to the Great Hall.

"I really hope there aren't any more Seekers trying out today," Marlene said, staring at her toast. She's barely touched it.

"Marles, you really have to eat something," I told her. She was sitting directly across from me. "A little now, then a little at lunch."

"If I eat it will come right back up," she said, throwing her toast down on her plate.

"I'll go down to the Potions classroom after breakfast and brew up something for your nerves, okay?" I told her, putting my hand on hers.

"Marlene, you're the best Seeker we've had in years. You've been on the team since your third year. No one has tried out since you joined that had your talent. You would have been on the team sooner if the one we had left sooner," James assured her. "You need to try and eat something." He nudged her plate a little towards her.

"We'll be there to support you," Remus said, wrapping his arm around her. She grudgingly picked up her toast and nibbled on the corner.

I poured her a cup of chamomile tea. "Drink."

"I think I'm going to try out, too," Sirius said. "My last year. Why not?"

"I was thinking about it, too," Dorcas said. "I usually play Keeper with my family. Figured now or never."

"Anyone else?" James asked, looking around as he bit off a piece of bacon. He couldn't hide the surprise in his voice from the new Quidditch hopefuls.

"Not me," I said. "I'm a fair flyer but Quidditch and I aren't on great terms."

"Yeah, I remember," Emmeline recalled. "You got so overwhelmed you nearly fell off your broom."

"You didn't have to say anything," I said. James looked at me curiously. "Too many rules. Gets scrambled. Don't try to explain it, I just get more confused."

"We tried," Emmeline added. "She understands enough to watch and not get too lost. Playing, on the other hand, she's a lost cause." I threw a grape at her, which she dodged with a laugh. "I'm going, by the way," she added in James's direction.

"I know Remus won't be there to audition," James stated, pointing his fork at Remus. "But I expect you," he kept pointing at Remus, "and you," he turned his fork to me, "to be there in the stands."

I bit the piece of pancake off his fork and smiled at him, "I'll be there."

He stared at his now empty fork and sighed, "I guess I had that coming."

Slughorn obviously had no hard feelings from the night before. When I asked to use the supply cupboard and classroom to brew something for Marlene's nerves, he was quick to comply. Maybe he wanted to make amends. Regardless, here I am.

I was in the empty Potions classroom with Remus, working on the Draught of Peace for Marlene. It's a very difficult potion and I wanted to be sure I had help and everyone else is either prepping for tryouts later or confined to the loo due praying for death.

Besides. Out of my confidants, it's Remus I trust most with a sensitive potion like this.

"I really hate brewing this but Marles really needs it," I said, looking over the instructions. "It's such a pain in the arse. One wrong move and it's 'good night, Marlene.'"

"You've made this perfectly at least once before. Just breathe," Remus said, looking through the supply cupboard. "Lets see, I have powdered moonstone, syrup of hellebore, powdered porcupine quills, and powdered unicorn horn. What am I missing?"

"Valerian root," I reminded him, setting up the cauldron and supplies. He brought the supplies over. "Lets do this."

I started adding the supplies to the cauldron, measuring each out carefully. Especially the Valerian root.

"So, what's the deal with you and Marles?" I asked Remus while I was stirring, not trying to hide my smirk. One... two... three... Seven clockwise, seven anti-clockwise.

"We've known each other since we were kids. I care about her but I can't let her risk her life for me."

"Does she know?"

"Yes, she does. Told her when we were younger. She was curious why I would be locked up once a month. Nothing gets past her," he said with a smile.

I lowered the heat on the cauldron so it could simmer for seven minutes. "Then why not make a move? Shouldn't it be her decision? You two have been friends forever. If you two don't work out as more than that, you don't work out for more than that. Can't know until you try."

"I know you're right but at the same time, I don't know if I can let her do that. I care about her too much."

"Again, if you think about it, it's her choice," I told him, checking the timer. One minute. I started to measure the hellebore. "She knows the risks and if she's ready to take them, she's ready to take them."

"What if she doesn't see me that way? She's always treated me like a brother," he said.

"Can't really sugar-coat it," I said honestly, adding the hellebore to the cauldron. "That's the risk you have to take."

I looked in the cauldron and sighed in relief. It was a beautiful shade of turquoise blue and emitted a light silver vapor. I put it in five small bottles, charming each to make sure they stay simmering. "One for each of our Quidditch friends, just in case."

"And legal, I checked," Remus assured.

"So, you going to talk to Marlene?" I asked him, cleaning up my space. "Scourgify," I said, pointing my wand at the cauldron. "Oh! Just thinking." I waved my wand in front of the bottles. "Now they can only be opened by who I give them to. That way Marlene doesn't try to take a double dose."

"Smart move," he laughed. "She's really nervous. I've never seen her this bad before trials since she first started trying out for the team."

"I think it's because it her last chance. Maybe there's some fluke first year that would be the best Seeker Gryffindor has ever seen," I said with a shrug.

Remus laughed, "Not bloody likely."

I remembered James saying something about them all staying in our common room for some peace, so we told them we'd meet them there after we were done brewing.

When we entered, everyone was relaxing or doing homework. Sirius has his spot on the floor with his Arithmancy text and a piece of parchment. James and Emmeline had the study table with Muggle Studies text, and Dorcas was in an armchair with her Transfiguration text.

Marlene was sprawled across the couch, her limbs hanging off all over.

I walked up to the couch and leaned over the back, hanging over her head. She had her arm over her face. "I have something for you," I singsonged.

She lifted her arm so she could see me, "Oh?"

I pulled out a bottle and held it over her head. Her eyes lit up.

"Lily Evans, I could kiss you," she said.

"I'd rather you didn't. Just drink it. I charmed it, so it's still simmering. And it will keep simmering until you open it." I turned to the other Quidditch hopefuls and their captain. "Made enough for everyone."

Dorcas looked up from her book. "Thanks!" she exclaimed. "I'll probably need it when it gets closer to time." I passed out the bottles.

"Is this the only one I get?" Marlene asked, examining the turquoise liquid.

"Yes, otherwise you'd fall asleep and never wake up. Then where will we be?" Remus said.

"You mean where would I be. I need a Seeker like Marles to help get the cup to Gryffindor this year," James said.

I walked over to James with the last bottle. He pushed out his chair a little when I came up so he could face me better but I just took it as an invitation and sat in his lap. I put the bottle on the table in front of him. "Just in case."

"Thank you," he said, kissing my cheek.

"Really, you two?" Sirius said from the floor.

"You do know we tone it down in public, right?" James replied with a smirk. I just turned red.

"Don't need the mental images, Prongs. Do not need the mental images," Sirius retorted, going back to his textbook.

I looked at the Muggle Studies stuff on the table. "You guys need help?" I asked, trying to see what they're covering. Looks like electricity.

"I think we got it," James replied. "We're almost done, actually. We wanted to get it out of the way."

"And it's a good distraction for me," Emmeline added. I laughed.

"I want to try and get some of Monday's work done today. Less to do tomorrow," I stated. There wasn't much. Breaking down the ingredients of the wit-sharpening potion and talking about other plant-based transfiguration spells. Only about one-and-a-half to two feet of parchment each. Then I had to do a two foot piece of parchment on what I believe are the most useful defenses spells to know. Easy work.

The work station only fit two people, so I took the other armchair with my books. We had a half hour before lunch, then an hour after lunch was tryouts. I was going to sit in the sidelines with Remus to support our friends.

I was writing why I believe Finite Incantatem was important to have knowledge of when I felt a tap on my shoulder. James was leaning around the corner with a questionable look on his face. "What?" I asked quietly.

"Do you know something I don't?" he asked me, not looking at me. I followed his gaze and saw Remus sitting on the couch now with Marlene. Her head was in his lap and he was stroking her hair. I turned my face back to his, kissed his cheek, smiled, and turned back to my Defense paper without a word.

We were finishing up dinner. I was trying to enjoy my apple pie with ice cream and cinnamon but I was distracted by the blonde ball of nerves in front of me.

"Marles, chill. Take the potion. It lasts a couple of hours. You're the best Seeker in this school. Relax."

"You're just saying that," she said.

"Marles, you know us. We'd tell if you weren't any good," I assured her, eating my pie.

"Right," Dorcas added, then turned to me. "Lily?"

"What?"

"You are the worst Quidditch player that have ever graced the grounds of Hogwarts," she said, putting her hand on my shoulder. I just looked at her.

"Thanks, Dorcas," I said flatly, then turned to Marlene. "See?"

She was laughing.

"Okay, laughing helps a little," she said, taking a breath.

"You going to eat?" James asked her.

"Good feeling's gone," Marlene said, face dropping. Remus wrapped his arm around her and whispered something in her ear.

I glanced at James and raised an eyebrow. He had a little smirk on his face. I noticed the vegetable soup on the table and poured a bowl and put it in front of Marlene. "Please?" I asked her. She nodded and ate slowly. I sighed in relief.

I continued eating my pie when I heard the owls coming in. Suddenly 'Nola landed in front of me and was carrying a small package. I stared at her.

"Isn't that yours?" Dorcas asked.

"No, she's just walking up to me and staring at me because she thinks I'm funny looking," I replied. I took the package and she jumped on my shoulder. After stroking her feathers I opened the package.

Oh, Mum, I love you.

"JAMMIE DODGERS!" I exclaimed. "Today is going to only get better!"

All my friends stared at me like I was going crazy.

"Sorry, these are my favorite Muggle treats. Ate them all the time growing up. It's a biscuit with jam. And I have enough to last me a while!" I slipped them in my bag.

"Lils, your owl is staring at me," Dorcas said nervously.

I looked at the bird on my shoulder. Lo and behold, Magnolia was fixated on Dorcas's face.

"She wants a piece of meat from your sandwich," I said nonchalantly.

Dorcas ripped off a piece of ham and held it up to the bird, who casually hopped onto Dorcas's shoulder from mine. Dorcas just froze, which caused the rest of us to laugh. 'Nola took the ham and ate it happily on Dorcas's stiff shoulder. She flew off when she was done.

"I swear, your owl is like a dog," she said after the owl flew off.

"I'm not denying anything," I said, eating the last of my pie.

Marlene was staring at her half-finished bowl of soup. "Drink the potion," Remus said softly in her ear. She did as she was told.

"What are we going to do for the next hour or so?" I asked James.

"I was going to go back to the room and prep. Get things together and all that."

"We're doing the same," Sirius said. "Except add on to that keeping an eye on Blondie over here."

"I feel great," Marlene said, smiling. Potion was starting to kick in.

"Do us a favor, James," Sirius said, turning to him. "Do the Seeker tryouts first. Just in case."

I was laying on my stomach on James's bed while he was running about the room. "I think you need the potion now, too," I told him as I observed him getting more and more anxious.

"In a minute," he said looking around.

"Now is better. You're almost as bad as Marles was."

He rolled his eyes and downed the potion. Ten minutes later he was fine. "Thanks," he said again. "This is just so stressful."

"No one will hold it against you if they don't get in, you know."

"I know," he sighed. "Still hard."

I waved him over to the bed and he sat down next to me. I sat up. "We don't have to be at the pitch for another forty minutes, so we can leave in twenty. Your gear is in the locker room. You know the sport, you know what you're doing. You've organized tryouts this twice before. Just relax now, okay?" I said, rubbing his back and shoulder comfortably.

He turned to me and kissed me, gently pushing me down on my back. He supported himself over me as our mouths worked as one. His kisses were rough and deep but I didn't care. It felt good. I wrapped my fingers into his hair and just held him as close as I could. His hand slipped to my waist, resting under my shirt there.

I broke the kiss and placed soft kisses on his cheek and down to his neck, hovering over his pulse points. He took my chin and moved me back so he could kiss me proper again. I felt a small moan in the back of my throat. I slipped my hand under his shirt, feeling his waist. I kept my other hand on his neck, holding him close. I felt his hand slip down my waist and down my leg and trail back up, holding my thigh beneath my skirt. I slipped my ring finger and pinky under the waistband of his pants, never breaking the kiss.

Then I heard the portrait hole close.

James broke the kiss and sighed dramatically. "Oh my fucking Merlin..." he said.

I shot him an apologetic glance and a quick kiss on his forehead. We got up and readjusted ourselves. I pulled out my ponytail and repositioned it and James cleaned off his glasses. Then he headed downstairs ahead of me while I went into my room to get my coat and Welly boots since it was wet and rainy most of the day. I also grabbed a package of Jammie Dodgers for good measure.

I got to the common room to find Remus alone talking with James.

"They wanted me to go ahead with you guys because they didn't think it would look good to come with the Captain," he was telling James.

"I don't blame them," I said when I entered. I sat in the armchair and slipped on my green Welly boots. I turned to Remus. "How's Marlene?"

"Potion's still going strong, thank Merlin. She was driving us insane all morning," he answered. "Who held auditions earlier?" Remus asked James.

"Hufflepuff," James answered. "Most of their top players were seventh-years last year. Who knows what they have now."

I got up and grabbed his hand. "Well, lets see how this goes!"