Chapter 27
(A.N: Sorry that it's so late! 'These are thoughts.' "This means someone is talking over the phone." TT means time passing or scene changes. You guys know the drill. And even though Christmas is over and done with – this is Christmas themed, so I'm going to say it: MERRY CHRISTMAS, BITCHES! R&R? Appreciate the love!)
TT
Kamui wasn't sure how he managed to hold himself together.
He didn't know how he kept himself from crying...Kept himself from falling to pieces...
Fuuma barely paid him any attention. The others didn't seem to notice – except for Fai; who looked confused. But the blonde was trying to pay attention to Kurogane – who had missed him more than anything.
Kamui understood, and kept out of the blue eyed males sight as much as possible.
He tried to keep to himself as much as possible...But it was hard. Subaru could see that he was down, so the younger raven made it his goal to cheer up his best friend.
It wasn't working.
He couldn't take much more of this. He needed to get out of here. His bag was already sitting by the door, so he went towards it now.
"Kamui, where are you going?" That was Subaru, who followed him to the door.
Seishiro watched over the two from the background, in case something should go wrong. Kamui didn't answer as he picked up his bag, and started to put on his shoes. Subaru kept grabbing on to his arms, his hands, trying to stop him from leaving...
Finally he latched on to one of the taller ravens hands, just as he finished with putting on his shoes.
"Kamui! Why are you leaving? Why do you have to go? You never tell me what's wrong anymore! You're always so sad! And I just want to know why! I feel like I know what might be causing it...And you know how to fix that...Is this...Is it all because of what happened? Between you...And Fuuma?"
The entire world slowed down and went silent as Kamui shoved Subaru down to the ground.
"SHUT-UP!" It was a breaking point. It was more than he could take,
"You've never experienced any real pain, Subaru! You have your Mother, and your Father, and they love you!"
"Yours loved you too-"
"—AND LOOK WHERE THAT PUT THEM! They died! They were in a car accident, and they died! You still have yours! And you've never experienced anything close to what I've experienced! You don't know what it's like to walk in my shoes! Don't act like you understand me! You don't know what it's like to lose everyone...I've lost my family...I gave up on the one thing that mattered to me...And then I nearly lost my best friend...You still have everything...You...You..." Realization dawned on him, as he stared down at the younger male. He'd shoved him down. Subaru was sitting on the floor, because Kamui didn't know how to control his emotions. Just like Fuuma wasn't looking at him as much these days.
Because he had no control over himself.
Kamui stared at Subaru for a moment longer, before he opened the door, and stepped outside. He closed the door behind himself, and walked in a daze. He walked aimlessly. He didn't know when he started crying...
But he knew that he was slowly falling to pieces.
TT
The rest of November carried on with Kamui looking more and more miserable, and Fuuma staying out of his way. But halfway through November, their friends got annoyed with the both of them, and forced them into hanging out again.
And it was on the last day of November, that the raven found himself walking home from school – back to his apartment. Back to a home that he didn't want to live in alone.
He'd been offered rides home – by Kurogane, Doumeki, Shogo, and Fuuma – all of which he'd declined. Sakura's older brother offered to drive him, but he politely told him that he wanted to walk home...Subaru's parents offered to drive him home as well – as they were picking up Subaru and Seishiro – who didn't drive because of his blinded eye. But he'd declined them as well.
He was all set on walking home, in the rain.
He was left with his thoughts.
Kamui wasn't sure what bothered him more; being around Fuuma while they weren't a couple, or not being around Fuuma at all. He wanted him back, but he didn't know what to say, how to say it...
And he was afraid.
What if he screwed up? What if his words came out in the wrong tone?
He inwardly kicked himself for that thought. Wrong tone? As in the angry tone that he used when he tried to tell Fuuma anything? How many times had his sentences sounded bad? Sounded angry? When did he ever talk to him in the ways that Syaoran spoke to Sakura...Or Hideki spoke to Chi? Even Kurogane spoke to Fai in a soft sort of way...His voice was gruff, but his words, and his feelings? Those were kind, and soothing. He'd seen the way the two coordinated themselves. They fit together like a puzzle.
Even Doumeki and Watanuki fit together. Sure, Watanuki was usually fighting the taller raven off about something, but in the end, he was happy. They both were...Because they fit.
He could never fit together with anyone like that.
What had Fuuma seen in him?
He tried to see himself through his own minds eye.
He was Kamui. He was relatively short in height, had ebony locks of hair, and blue eyes. His birthday was May the thirteenth. He was currently eighteen. He'd lost his parents when he was six years old. He'd lived with his best friend and his parents until he felt that he was old enough to live out on his own.
He loved to read, more than anything else. It was his favourite pastime. He also loved swimming, because it was so freeing. He liked campfires, because it felt good to curl up next to a fire with your friends...
He was embarrassed easily. He'd never been any good at showing his emotions...
He paused.
His emotions. That was it right there. He'd never been any good at showing his emotions.
He knew it, he'd always known it. Even when he denied it, that didn't make it any less true...
How many times had he pushed himself away from telling the others how he felt? He was Kamui – the quiet one, the reserved one. The one with nothing interesting to offer...Nothing special.
He didn't have Watanuki's ability to cook, or his way with words...He didn't have Fai's selflessness...He didn't have Subaru's gentle kindness...
He didn't have anything to offer, because he kept everything locked up inside. He kept everything behind closed doors.
He didn't know how to love.
That thought stuck him, and it struck him hard. How could he have been in a relationship with someone, when he didn't even know how to open up to anyone?
What had Fuuma seen in him?
Whatever it was...It was gone. Fuuma barely looked at him. Barely met his gaze. Hardly smiled. He was turning to stone, and everyone was worried...
But even as he himself shattered into millions of pieces...
No one seemed to care.
So what was the point? He had nothing left in this life. And there were so many ways to die...Weren't there?
There was a truck down the road...
He stepped towards the road. He could step out in front of it, and it would take him. His life wouldn't last long. He stepped closer. He could die. It would be so easy. They'd crash into him, and he'd be hit, dragged a bit...He'd die. Another step. It would be so easy...
He paused.
What was he thinking? It was raining, and there were cars out here, and he wanted to die like that?
He stepped away from the edge of the sidewalk – away from the road. All of it would have been for nothing. What he lost, their risks...All of it would have been for nothing...
'You'll have a long, happy life,' the voice echoed in his head, and he clamped his hands over his ears, trying to drown it out. But it was in his head, and there was no getting rid of it.
'You'll make so many friends...And you'll have a good life...'
"...No..." He argued, wanting the voice to stop.
'You'll meet someone one day...And you'll get married...And you'll understand love...'
"...No...NO..." He protested, squeezing his eyes shut tightly...
'...You'll live...'
"NO!" He opened his eyes, removed his hands from his ears, and started running.
He needed to be home. He needed to get out of the rain, and away from the cars. He needed to escape...
He needed Fuuma.
But even as he ran into his apartment building...Up to his unit...Even when he locked the door behind himself, and called out the males name...
Even then, he knew that he was all alone.
He had nothing but his memories, to keep him company.
TT
No one saw Kamui for the rest of that week.
He didn't come to school. He didn't call – or text – anyone. He didn't come out of his apartment. He was locked up in there, and people were afraid...
But Fuuma reassured them all, that Kamui was alive. And whenever they asked questions, he simply held up his key to the males apartment. He checked up on him, to make sure that he was – in the very least – still breathing.
And, sure enough, Monday, December the sixth...Kamui showed up at school.
His eyes were lost. There were circles under his eyes. He was dressed, but his shoelaces were untied. His bag was dragging...
He was a mess.
"KAMUI!" Fai was the first to rush to him, grabbing him by the shoulders,
"You look terrible...Are you okay?"
The raven haired male blinked up at him. At first, he didn't speak. But then it seemed to dawn on him, that he should probably answer,
"...Fai?"
"Kamui...Are you alright?"
"...Are my shoes undone?"
The question was random, and unexpected...But Fai couldn't even bring himself to laugh. He smiled a bit, and nodded,
"Yeah, they're undone. You should probably tie them up, so you don't fall..." As the blonde said it, he lead the raven over to the lockers – to be out of the way of student traffic.
But Kamui made no move to tie his shoelaces. He stared at them blankly for a few moments, and it dawned on the blonde that the raven probably didn't remember how to tie his shoes. He was going into regression...And it was happening too quickly...
Fai sighed, but decided he'd help out. He crouched down, to tie Kamui's shoelaces.
"...Fai?"
"Yeah Kamui?"
"...What's it like...To die...Slowly?"
The blonde froze.
"...Through cuts..." The raven haired male added in, noticing the stiffness of the males form. He noticed weird things in this state...
"...For me...It was a release...I'm so used to the pain, that I've become rather numb to most of it...But I guess for someone who wasn't experienced in it like I am? I guess...That would be rather painful...And hard..." Fai stood up again, having completed his task,
"Why do you ask?"
"...Just a thought..." Kamui looked down to his shoes,
"And thank you."
TT
Kamui's regressed state remained throughout the week...Until he seemed to realize that he was relying on the others too much, and he snapped himself back out it. He went right back to being closed off on his emotions...And he got to noticing things that he hadn't before.
It was happening throughout the last week of school – before Christmas break.
Fuuma was...
Smiling.
When had that started? How could he have missed it?
Oh, right...He'd been busy with digging himself a metaphorical grave. He hadn't had the time to notice that his ex-fiancée was smiling again. That he looked happier than he'd looked in months.
Why was that?
It couldn't just be the fact that the holidays were on their way...Sure, everyone was happy about it...But Fuuma was in a rut, like him, wasn't he?
Or maybe he was already climbing out, and doing better...Maybe he was moving on...
The thought horrified Kamui. He couldn't be without Fuuma...That was already too hard. He was still trying to figure out a way to tell him that he wanted him back in his life...He couldn't just...Move on, and be with someone else...Not now...Not this close to Christmas...
He tried to keep his worries off of his face.
"Hey Kamui," the voice was familiar, and unexpected,
"Are you alright?"
"..." He was staring at Fuuma – who was staring at him. And he looked concerned. And they were making actual eye contact. Eye contact that lasted more than five seconds. Eye contact that was turning the shorter ravens knees to water, as he remembered why it was that he loved the male standing before him. Turned his brain into a pile of mush, because he was realizing that he'd finally understood what it meant to love someone...
It had been so unintentional.
'...And you'll understand love...' That voice echoed in his head, and he resisted his urges to cry.
"...Yeah...I'm fine..." No, he wasn't. He needed to be held. He needed to be told that someone loved him...That Fuuma loved him...
But how did he say that?
"...Alright. You looked really zoned out for a second there."
"...Oh...Sorry..." He had been zoned out. He was worried. He didn't want the taller raven to move on. He needed him.
Gods, how was he supposed to tell him that?
The idea hit him then...And it stung.
What if Fuuma didn't want him anymore?
He was moving on, after all, so it made sense. Maybe he'd found himself a new girlfriend to date, marry, start a family with...Or maybe he found himself a new boyfriend...
That hit Kamui hard.
The idea of Fuuma with another man – it was even more painful than the idea of Fuuma being with a woman. Because if Fuuma was with a woman, then Kamui would understand what it was that she had, that he could never offer. She could become a Mother to Fuuma's children. Kamui couldn't procreate with Fuuma. It was impossible. But if Fuuma was with another man...Then Kamui would know for sure...That this new male had much more to offer. He would have a wonderful personality, a brilliant sense of humour...He'd be sweet, and loving, and everything that Kamui could never be.
And the smaller raven would be left alone.
TT
December. 24th.
It was early. They'd all been Christmas shopping throughout the week. And now, they were all at Kurogane and Fai's shared home. Presents to everyone, from everyone, were all under their Christmas tree – because the others had decided to come back for Christmas. Subaru had warned them that he'd be a little late – simply because he had parents that wanted to see him until noon – at least.
No one complained, because they were fine with waiting. And for now, they were discussing what Christmas would be like...Turkey dinner – they'd have to cook two turkeys to feed all of these people. They were going to have seventeen people, instead of fifteen – as Shooter and Raiko were going to be joining them.
As the day progressed, and the conversations continued, Kamui built up his nerves. The others – except for Tomoyo, Fuuma, and he himself – were all cuddling up with their partners. And Kamui spent that time trying to get the courage to ask the question.
It was a simple one. A yes or no answer. It wouldn't cut him too deeply if the male said no.
So he decided to try,
"Hey Fuuma?"
"Yeah?"
"...Did you...Do you, uh...Want to hang out, tonight...?"
The others kept to themselves, but Kamui could tell that Fai was listening.
"...Sorry...I can't...I've got a date tonight..."
Heads turned.
"In fact, I should probably get going. I have to get everything ready for tonight." As he said it, he lifted himself up off of the couch, and headed towards the door.
"What's this guy like?" Fai questioned, just as surprised as Kamui happened to be.
"He's...How do I describe him? Beautiful, and amazing...He's got the greatest laugh...And when he smiles..." Here Fuuma smiled fondly, slipping in to his shoes,
"...When he smiles, the whole world stops spinning..."
He took a moment to pull on his coat, and tug his keys out of his pocket,
"If anyone needs a ride, now's the time to start asking..." He jingled the keys.
"My parents are picking me up soon...We're having Seishiro over for supper tonight..." Subaru spoke up, knowing that Kamui needed to hear another offer.
No one moved, so Fuuma grinned,
"Alright, suit yourselves then. I'll see you guys tomorrow!"
When the door closed behind him, everyone turned to Kamui – who was staring at his feet. He didn't speak. He didn't move.
"...Kamui?" That was Fai – who was trying to make sure that the male was alright.
No response.
Even when Subaru sat down next to him, as a means of comfort...Even as he spoke to him softly...
Still nothing.
A knock at the door proved to be Subaru's parents. Kamui went with them as a means of getting home, but he still didn't speak. He didn't even bother with eye contact.
He got out of the car when they reached his apartment complex. Went up to his unit, and locked the door behind himself. He stood there in the silence for a moment, before he removed his shoes, and trudged his way down to the bathroom.
He was already clean, but he decided to shower again – to give himself something to do.
When he had stripped down, and was standing beneath the powerful stream of water, he found himself focusing on every detail of his shower – just to avoid his thoughts.
And when he was dressed once again...He found himself wearing boxers, and Fuuma's dress shirt – which had been through the wash multiple times throughout all of their time apart. It no longer smelled of the male...But it was a reminder nonetheless.
And he found himself curling up on the couch with his pillow, and a heavy blanket...Watching the DVD footage from their time spent camping.
He was so used to the tears, that he hardly noticed them as they poured from his eyes...Staining his pillow with little droplets of remorse.
Fuuma had seen something in him then...In his eyes...In his smile...But now, there was another man...Someone else, who meant more to him than Kamui ever could have. And that hurt.
He closed his eyes, trying to block out the thoughts in his head...But he found himself trying to construct a visual of this other male.
He was probably taller than Kamui himself happened to be. A beautiful smile...Gentle eyes...
'...And you'll understand love...'
The voice was back in his head, and he hated it. He just wanted to block everything out.
He drifted into a fitful sleep...Stirring slightly when he heard a knock at his door an hour or two later. He'd lost track of time.
Whoever it was, they were persistent. Knocking...Then pausing...Knocking again...On and off...
Kamui buried his face in his pillow, not wanting company.
However, his ears clued in to a different sound. Jingling. A click...
His body went numb. His mind went blank. There was no way that he was hearing what he thought he was hearing. It couldn't be happening.
Even as the person entered the house, and shuffled out of their shoes. Even as the door closed and locked behind them...
He listened as the male wandered in to the kitchen, and set down what sounded like paper bags. Then he heard him stop to lean against the kitchen entryway. He didn't move from that position, and Kamui knew that he was waiting.
The shorter raven sat up – remembering too late that he was wearing the males dress shirt. He tried to keep his breathing even, as he got to his feet, and turned in the taller males general direction.
He couldn't lift his head at first. Couldn't think of what it was that he wanted to say. Couldn't form a proper sentence...
"...Hey..." The voice was so familiar, it nearly tore him apart to hear it.
When he didn't respond, the taller raven spoke once again...
"Kamui?"
"...What are you doing here...? I thought you had a date."
"I do."
Here he looked up, feeling that anger course through him. If he had a date, then what the hell was he doing here?
"Then what are you doing he-?"
"—I told you I was coming over."
Kamui froze. His mind replayed the words that the male had used to describe his date earlier that day, and he scoffed, shaking his head,
"Fuuma, none of the words that you used, describe me. At all."
"That's because you don't see yourself very clearly." Fuuma didn't move, but he did smile. And it melted Kamui's heart to see it...
"...I'm not beautiful," Kamui announced – using Fuuma's description from earlier on in the day as an argument,
"I'm...Average...And there's nothing amazing about me...I have a nasty temper, and I love to read. Plain and simple," as he said it, he turned away.
"...You're not so plain and simple..." Fuuma murmured, disagreeing,
"...You love to read...You also love to swim...And you like campfires..."
"Those are things that everyone knows, Fuuma." Kamui felt his shoulders drooping. He felt...Disappointed.
"...Alright...You love to read, and swim, and you like campfires. You're secretly scared of watching horror movies alone – not because they're scary, but because they leave you feeling that lurking paranoia. You actually enjoy the occasional chick flick. You sing when you're in the shower. You love Asian food, but you won't touch sushi – because you don't like the concept of raw fish. You have a vendetta against macaroni and cheese. Your eyes are blue, and when you're happy – the shade is deeper. You're a sucker for cuddling, but you'd never own up to it. You don't make eye contact when you're embarrassed, and you blush right up to your ears...You'll only drink double doubles when it comes down to coffee...When you read, you don't just read...You become one with the characters. You feel what they feel, and you live their lives with them until the end of the book. You can't read about car accidents without cringing, and you won't watch them happen in the movies – you always look away...You hate having your hair in your eyes, but you like to have it long enough, so that you can hide behind it, so no one can see your face...You have three scars along your right hip – from when you were six...You criticize yourself on everything that you say and do..." Fuuma usually didn't say so many things at once. But Kamui needed to hear it. He needed to understand that there was so much more to him than what he was seeing in himself...And Fuuma saw all of it.
He approached him from behind, and moved around him, to stand in front of him,
"...You really are beautiful...And when you laugh...It's the most beautiful sound in the world...And when you smile...The whole world really does stop spinning..."
Kamui ducked his head, using his bangs as a means of hiding his face.
"...There you go with that hair of yours again..." Fuuma murmured, taking one of the shorter males hands, and placing it over his own heart. He knew that Kamui was blushing at the contact. Fuuma's nerves were raw, but he wasn't going to give up.
"...You feel that? It's my heartbeat...And it's racing. And that's what it's like, whenever I'm with you. It races and you drive me crazy – in the best of ways..." He paused for a moment, stroking his fingers over the hand that he had captured against his heart. He smiled fondly, continuing,
"...I've missed you...More than anything...And I want to be with you...Forever..."
Kamui lifted his gaze, to make eye contact with Fuuma.
"...I love you, Kamui..."
The blue eyed male couldn't stop the fresh flow of tears,
"...I love you too..." It was a whisper...But he'd managed to say it.
Fuuma lead him in to a kiss, his lips soft and strong. Kamui kissed back – eager for the time that they had missed out on...He needed this. This simple display of affection. He needed it like he needed air.
Even when they pulled apart, Kamui still had not had enough. He offered Fuuma only a few seconds of breathing, before he leant up on his tiptoes – stealing the taller ravens lips once again.
TT
They had managed to eat – Fuuma had bought dinner from Kamui's favourite restaurant.
And now, they were sitting together on the couch. The TV was on, but the volume had been turned down, to be used as background noise.
Kamui had been sitting next to Fuuma – with his head on the taller ravens shoulder...But now he was sitting with his knees pulled to his chest. His arms were crossed over his knees, and he was staring unseeingly at his barely decorated Christmas tree. It was up, and it had lights. He hadn't bothered with doing anything more than that, because at the time – he hadn't had Fuuma.
But none of that mattered now.
"...I told you, that you don't know everything there is to know about me...But you're pretty close to it..." Kamui murmured.
Fuuma chuckled lightly at that, but let it fade when he read the shorter males expression,
"Kamui? What's wrong?"
"...Just thinking...About my parents..." He continued to stare at the tree – but he wasn't seeing it. He was so far gone in to the cracks of his own memories, that he couldn't see the tree at all.
Fuuma didn't answer verbally, but he did reach out – brushing his fingers through Kamui's hair. It was a gentle reminder that he was still here, still listening.
Kamui sighed,
"...Their accident...I always describe it in the same ways...Detached...Limited information...But I know about it...I know the details off by heart..."
"...I imagine that it would be hard to forget about something like that," Fuuma agreed gently.
"...Yeah..." There was another pause, before Kamui spoke up again,
"...They were driving in the rain...It was late...And there was a dog in the middle of the road...They didn't want to hit it...So, they swerved..." He took a moment to swallow hard,
"The car rolled...When it finally came to a stop...It had crashed into a building...Dad died on impact...Mom held out though...But she hadn't been in her seat, wearing her seatbelt...She'd been on her way in to the backseat...And she got cut by the glass...She wound up dying from blood loss..."
"...Why would she-?" Fuuma turned to look at Kamui, and the pieces fell in to place,
"...Kamui..."
The tears slid past the shorter ravens eyes against his will.
"Kam-"
"—I WAS IN THE CAR!" When the words were finally out, Kamui buried his face in his arms. He could feel himself falling to pieces...
"...I was in the car! I asked her to come back and sit with me! And then I saw the dog in the road...And I was young...I didn't want to hit it with the car...And I told Dad not to...So he swerved...But the rain, and the sudden turn...It made the car roll...And now..." He swallowed hard, trying to breathe,
"...I killed my parents, Fuuma...They died because of me...My Mom tried to protect me...She used her body as a shield...I only got the three cuts on my hip...But she was cut so badly that it killed her...I killed my parents..."
"...Kamui..." The taller raven wrapped the male up in his arms, holding him tightly,
"Listen...Your parents...They loved you – more than anything...Your Dad didn't want to upset you by hitting the dog...So he tried to avoid it...And your Mom was coming back to sit with you, because you wanted her to, and she wanted to do it for you...And she protected you, because she loved you...You didn't kill anyone...It was a freak accident..."
Kamui trembled in his hold – latching on to him for support. He needed him. He needed to be anchored down.
He needed Fuuma.
"She spent her last moments...Telling me about what a good life I was going to have...That I'd make friends...And get married...And understand love...She told me that I'd live...She didn't care about herself...About her pain...She was more concerned about me..." Sobs wracked through his body as he let Fuuma in on the final moments of his Mother's life. Moments that he hadn't even shared with Subaru.
Fuuma held him closer.
TT
There was a noise, stirring him back into consciousness.
It was a buzzing noise...And it dawned on him that it was a cell phone. So – eyes still half closed – he reached out to the bedside table, picked up his cell phone, and flipped it open.
Nothing.
But he was still hearing it. So, he set his phone back down, and rolled over.
He blinked at the form lying next to him, as the events of the previous night played over in his mind. Fuuma...He'd come home. So the sound was Fuuma's cell phone...
Kamui ran his fingers through his boyfriends hair, before reaching over him – to pick up the phone. He flipped it open to find that it was a call...And it was Fai.
A mutual friend – so he figured that it would be alright if he answered for him...
He hit 'talk.'
"What do you think you're doing? Kamui left here the other day looking really upset! He's not answering his cell phone! Subaru has tried to call him, and text him, and so have I! I know he's smart, but he's all alone, and dammit! You both need to swallow your pride and make up already! I mean, I know I went through this crap with Kurogane, but dammit we were never engaged! You two were! And if you two don't ge-"
"—Fai?"
"...Kamui?"
"...Yeah. It's me..." The shorter raven blinked, stunned that the blonde had called with the intention of yelling at Fuuma.
"...But I called Fuuma's cell phone...Didn't I?"
"...Yeah, you did..."
"...What am I missing?"
Kamui couldn't help but chuckle at that. Fai was completely confused about the shorter raven answering Fuuma's cell phone...Especially after the previous day.
Two long arms encircled him from behind him, and he jumped slightly – surprised. Fuuma chuckled near his ear,
"Scare you?"
"...Jerk. I wasn't expecting you to do that!"
Fuuma let out another throaty chuckle, before kissing Kamui's neck. When the shorter raven blushed, Fuuma smiled against his skin. He'd missed this.
He took the cell phone, gently,
"Hey Fai."
"...Alright, are you going to tell me what the hell is going on?"
"I lied about having a date with some mystery guy...I was really just setting up a date for Kamui and myself...I lied so that I could surprise him..."
"...So everything is back to normal?" He sounded so hopeful...
"Pretty much...We're dating again..."
"FINALLY!" A chorus of voices announced from the other end, and Fuuma pulled his phone away from his ear, so that he could stare at it dumbfounded. After a moment, he returned the phone to his ear,
"...Am I on speakerphone?"
"Yeah, you are," that was Fai.
"What? We're on speakerphone? Fuuma! Hang up! I hate you guys!" Kamui announced, covering his face with both hands.
"We'll see you guys soon," that was Fuuma – who hung up before things could turn ugly.
TT
Christmas at Kurogane and Fai's couldn't have been better.
Gifts were exchanged from everyone, to everyone. There were laughs among the group, and more love than anyone could have imagined existing within one room.
Fuuma and Kamui didn't have anything to really give to one another – because they'd been so distant with each other. But Kamui had gotten the taller raven a card – which was witty, and which made Fuuma laugh. But the taller raven had not gotten the blue eyed male a card.
Instead, he got to his feet, and wandered over to his backpack. And then he returned, standing in front of the male.
"I didn't get you a card...But, I do have something for you...So, I sincerely hope that you don't mind getting the same thing twice..."
"What do you mean?" Kamui was confused by the taller ravens words.
"I mean..." Fuuma started, setting a hand on the coffee table. He lowered himself to the kneeling position, carefully,
"...That I have something to ask you."
The room fell in to silence.
Kamui stared at Fuuma, knowing the question. His heart hammered against his chest, and he tried to regulate his breathing...
Fuuma took hold of one of his hands, brushing his thumb along the males knuckles,
"I love you."
"...I love you too..."
"And I want to be stay with you...Forever..."
Kamui couldn't make himself answer. There was a lump in his throat, threatening to choke him...
"...Will you marry me?"
The shorter raven ducked his head – trying to hide the tears. He nodded weakly, and allowed Fuuma to slip a ring on to his finger. And when he caught sight of the ring, he stared at it – dumbfounded.
Fuuma noticed,
"...I had to take it back, to have them work out the dent...But yes, it's the same ring."
"...You kept it..."
"Of course I kept it...It was my constant reminder of you..."
Kamui closed his eyes, tightly, trying not to cry any harder.
TT
(A.N: Wow, long chapter is long. But they're finally back together! And I hope you guys are happy! XD Sorry that I didn't get it to you for Christmas...I've been really off track with my sleep schedule...So, what do you think? Now we understand Kamui's past a bit better...I actually felt really bad when I went through and edited it...R&R?)