So human

"What?" House demanded as he sat down next to Nyx. She had been waiting for him in the gazebo again.

"I didn't say anything," Nyx denied.

"But you were going to," House stated.

"Most likely," Nyx agreed. "I rarely keep quiet for any length of time during our meetings. But even so, you don't need to be so aggressive."

"You were going to call me stupid," House accused.

"Nope, no need for that," Nyx refuted. Then, as House was still clearly expecting more, she elaborated: "You already know you were being stupid. You acted like an ass – which, granted, is your normal mode of operation – and then you tried to make things right by being even a bigger ass. Fortunately you wised up, and mended what could be mended."

"You think I went way over the top at first?" House sighed.

"You know you did," Nyx laughed. "You're a typical guy. Most guys just don't get it how irritating the small things can be. Especially when she has told you that she wants you to stop. Had she expected you to just figure it out on your own, - you know the way some people do, sighing and rolling eyes and just expecting you to read her mind and then blowing up without a warning when you don't; had that been the case I would have said she was unreasonable."

"Like Wilson and Sam the first time around," House remembered.

"And almost the second time around as well had you not pushed him," Nyx pointed out. "Mind you, they still got it wrong in the end."

"Yeah," House agreed. "But why didn't I see that with Cuddy? Why didn't I hear her sooner?"

"Because you are emotionally involved," Nyx told him. "That makes you blind in a way you're not used to. When you watch things unfold from the sidelines, you see things clearly and objectively. That's what makes you such a good doctor: you really can separate your feelings from the puzzle. But when you apply that same approach to your relationship with Lisa, you are still right, but you don't see how it affects Lisa's emotional wellbeing. Sometimes being right just isn't right. Sometimes adjusting to the other person's point of view is much more important. Even when you don't agree."

"She said I didn't make her feel like I cared," House pondered. "I thought that she knew I love her."

"She knows," Nyx confirmed. "She said so. She even knows that you need her. That is why she keeps giving you new chances - and because when you do figure things out you usually do change your behaviour as well. But the thing is she doesn't need you. She can go on living just fine without you as well. You are not necessary to her. Sure her life will be less vibrant, less exciting, less intense, but 'vibrant, exciting and intense' can burn you out, exhaust you. She needs to know that she can rely on you for the small things as well, that you care about her every-day well-being too. She knows you'll be there for the big things, you've already proven that – especially with her mother. But everyday life is about small things and when the honeymoon is over it is the small things that erode a relationship. Because how you deal with her small requests shows to her how you think about her every day."

"I think about her all the time," House frowned in puzzlement. "I need her to breathe easily. But if she doesn't need me, why does she stay? Why does she give me a chance after chance?"

"Because she loves you," Nyx stated. "You need to understand that love and need can be equally powerful motivators in a relationship."

"But if you love someone, don't you need him, too?" House asked.

"No," Nyx replied simply.

"I do," House countered.

"I know," Nyx nodded. "But though you need her and love her, you haven't been acting very lovingly – until now, that is. Taking out the trash, remembering not to slam the door so that Rachel wakes up, using your own toothbrush when she has clearly stated that she prefers that you do; those are things that show the love. Sex you can have with anyone, love in that act is optional."

"But it sure is better with love," House pointed out.

"I'm glad you think so," Nyx smiled.

"You don't?" House wondered.

"I think it's better with caring," Nyx shrugged. "Sometimes it is difficult to tell the difference between caring and love. But that's just me. You, of course, have difficulties in trusting in just love."

"It's not that I don't trust it, exactly," House muttered. "But love dies; it goes away."

"So does need," Nyx reminded him.

"No it doesn't," House countered. "When you no longer need you're no longer alive."

"Maybe so," Nyx accepted. "But need isn't necessarily specific. You need vitamin C. You're used to getting it from oranges. If you become allergic to oranges you can either eat some other plant that is rich in vitamin C or you can take a pill. You need what Lisa can give you, be for you, but if she leaves you and the need is vital, you will find someone else to fill in for her. After all, you managed for years without her, too!"

"So if I can't trust neither need nor love, what can I trust?" House wanted to know.

"Yourself, as always," Nyx told him. "And Lisa. Neither of you can give the other any guarantees about future and the longevity of your relationship or even your feelings. All you can do is trust that neither of you want to hurt the other. Of course, you may end up doing that anyway but you knew that going in. But the important part is that it won't be deliberate."

"If she doesn't want to hurt me," House asked. "Why did she as good as dumb me?"

"She didn't dumb you," Nyx exclaimed. "She wanted a time out. She wanted some peace and quiet so that she could figure out if the price of being with you was worth it. She also needed to show you that she was serious about her wants and wishes. She wasn't asking you to change, just to show that you care."

"That is asking me to change," House sighed. "I'm not very good at caring."

"Don't try that with me," Nyx told him. "I know how much you care. You're just more used to hiding it than showing it. She wasn't asking you to change your personality, just to adjust to the new situation. Just to be a bit more open and … You're not going to like this, but she just wanted you to be a bit less like Wilson."

"Wilson!" House stared at her in astonishment. "Wilson is the epitome of caring and consideration! In fact the main reason why he has divorced so often was because he tried to take care of his wives so well that he forgot about himself and then he imploded. Sort of."

"His strategy is different, yes," Nyx admitted. "But his aim is the same. He uses caring like you use rudeness: as a shield to hide behind. If it is your actions that cause people to be drawn to you and/or then to reject you, then it's never truly personal. You act like a jerk, and I'm not saying it doesn't come naturally to you, just saying that it really is not the only way you can act if you want to; so you act like a jerk because then the rejection is due to your behaviour. If you care; if you open up to someone and still get rejected, then it's personal. Then it really is you who are rejected not just your behaviour. You can't say that you just didn't behave well enough for her, you would have to accept that it was you who wasn't good enough for her. Or that is how you see it. Not surprisingly, though, given that your Dad never cared about who you were as long as you acted as he wanted to."

"Can we leave my Dad out of this," House requested.

"We can try," Nyx said. "I'm not sure he can be left out, but we can try. Your Mother, too, I suppose."

"Definitely we will leave my Mom out of this," House stated.

"You do understand that the way she was brought up had a lot to do with her decisions?" Nyx asked.

"We are not discussing her," House repeated.

"Fine," Nyx shrugged. "But don't you think that when a mother loves unconditionally she would be willing to do anything for her child?"

"Is that a dig at Cuddy?" House asked - deflecting. "She wasn't willing to use her connections to get Rachel into the school she really wanted for her."

"Maybe she was trying to teach Rachel ethics," Nyx pointed out.

"Rachel is too young to learn anything like that," House scoffed. "And ethics are supposedly part of the curriculum in that school."

"Kids may be too young to understand things when they happen," Nyx agreed. "But they do remember and later they understand. And they do learn best from example."

"Cuddy is an optimistic idealist," House said. "She sees the world as it is, but she thinks that it can become what she wishes it were. I love that in her, but Rachel needs to live in the real world and Cuddy won't always be there for her. Nepotism, connections, money and influence do matter in life."

"Unless you're a genius," Nyx suggested.

"Genius is just a way to get money and connections," House observed cynically. "When you're right, people come to you and you have influence."

"You have a very low opinion of humanity," Nyx sighed.

"You claim to have been around since the beginning of time," House said. "Am I wrong?"

"Part of the time, no," Nyx had to admit. "And yet, part of the time... Let's just say that I, too, have moments of optimistic idealism."